Chapter 11
eleven
. . .
Ronan
"This place is cool," I said as I walked to the big front window. The sun had set on the day and the long week and the town lights lit up the sky. "What's this apartment setting you back?" I asked Colin. He was carrying in two boxes.
"You mean how much is it setting us back?"
My happiness, my relief of no longer being passed from house to house like an old, farting uncle that nobody wanted was suddenly paused. "Bro, I can't split this with you. I thought I was just renting a room."
Colin laughed. "Relax. You're not splitting the bill. I thought a grand a month. Will that work?"
"Fuck yeah, that works." I walked into the kitchen. The counters were granite and the refrigerator was massive. "This is like a damn five-star hotel."
"Like you've ever been in a five-star hotel," Colin said. "Help me get some more boxes from the truck."
I followed Colin out. Two women were coming out of the neighboring apartment.
One was wearing a tight black skirt and the other had on jeans that highlighted curves in all the right places.
The one in the skirt hurried over on her ankle boots.
"You must be our new neighbors. I'm Jen and this is Esme. "
"I'm Colin, and this is my brother Ronan."
Jen leaned her head toward Esme. "Told you a hunk was moving in next door.
" Jen smiled. "I saw you looking at the place with the building manager, and I texted Esme at work and said our new neighbor is going to be way better than old Mr. Grimshaw.
He cooked fish every night, and he pounded on the walls if we were laughing too loud.
" Jen had blue eyes and red hair that was cut short.
"Are you moving in, too, or just helping with the boxes? " she asked me.
"I'll be moving in, too."
"Woo-hoo, Esme, it's our lucky day. We'll talk later. I have a feeling we're all going to become great friends." We watched the two of them walk away, and they made sure to move all the right parts to make their departure more intriguing.
Colin looked at me. "You're welcome. Guess this beats washing Dad's underwear and listening to him belch.
" His phone rang, and he pulled it out. "Speaking of the belch man.
Go get some more boxes." He carried the phone inside.
"Hey, Dad …" His voice trailed off as I walked down the stairs to Colin's truck.
It was a nice Saturday for a change. The clouds had gone, leaving behind a clear blue sky and a glacial chill in the air.
I was so damn happy about finally having a place to live where I didn't feel like a leech or a guest overstaying their welcome.
Nev, Indi and, of course, Rio were all cool about me staying in their places, but I could feel Zander and Jameson counting the days.
I really owed my twin this time. He got me out of a lousy, homeless feel that, even with the new job, was making me feel like crap.
I carried two heavy boxes marked "kitchen shit" up the stairs. A woman with two kids, twins, walked out of a neighboring apartment. "Morning," I said cheerily.
"Morning and welcome to the neighborhood.
" They walked past me, and I tapped the ajar door open with my toe.
Colin was putting glasses in a cupboard.
His phone was on speaker, and Dad was giving him pointers for his next snowboarding competition.
My old man had never even been on a snowboard, but he had that unshakeable confidence that allowed him to believe that he knew best about everything.
"Anyway, Colin, I'm proud of you. You stayed focused and worked hard and it's paying off. Now, if we can just get your damn brother to focus on anything besides his next glass of beer and next pussy conquest."
Colin spun around, spotted me, grabbed the phone and switched it off speaker.
"Too late," I said as I set down the boxes.
"I already heard the big love fest. And here I thought I was his favorite twin," I said wryly.
It had always been that way between Dad and Colin and me.
Colin was the fair-haired, blue-eyed wonder boy, and I was the dark-haired black sheep of the twin set.
I looked more like Mom and that seemed to make Dad dislike me even more.
They'd had a rough few years of marriage.
Colin and I were too young to remember, but Zander said they fought all the time.
My mom even threw a heavy beer glass at Dad's head once that sent him to the emergency room for stitches.
Apparently, according to our mom, she came home from work one day and found Dad in bed with another woman.
When she threatened to take us back to Ireland, he hired one of his friends, a real slimy pit bull of a lawyer to go after her green card and immigration status.
She raced back to her homeland, leaving her two twin boys in the care of their very unstable and mostly fucked up father.
Colin finished the call fast and turned back to his task of filling dish cupboards. "You know Dad. He's always big on complaining about one of us when talking to one of the other sons. I'll bet he says shit about me all the time when he's talking to you."
"Nope. You're the golden boy, remember? I'm the piece of shit who just happened to be born on the same day as you. Can't even blame his hate of me on Mom because you came out of the same woman."
Colin stopped what he was doing. "Ro, I think you're reading him all wrong."
"I'm not and it's all right because I've already figured this all out, and I don't expect it to change or him to change or our relationship to change.
Look, Zander was his first born, and he's massive and tough as fucking nails and doesn't back down.
They butt heads plenty, but it's easy to see how proud Dad is of him.
And now that he has Nev, well, that was just a big red bow on top for Zander.
Jameson was always the kid who was going to make a success of things no matter how hard Dad made it.
Even on his worst days in high school, when he was constantly in trouble and fighting the guilt of causing Indi's Dad to drive off the rainy road, even then, it was easy to see that he was going to do something, he was going to be someone.
And he took Dad's half-assed excavation business and turned it into a gold mine.
He works hard for his success, and he's earned every penny.
And you, well, you excelled at every sport, whether it was soccer or baseball or skateboarding or snowboarding. "
"You were just as good at all those sports. Better even," Colin noted.
"Except I didn't have the discipline and focus to make a go of any of them.
Dad's right in that respect. I was given talents, but I didn't use them.
I liked fun. I liked things that didn't take discipline or focus.
In a way, I took more after the old man than any of you, and I don't say that as a brag cuz it's definitely fucking not.
And then, of course, there's the true golden boy, Nate.
He was kind of perfect from the start, and his mom stuck around longer.
Dad had slowed down on his sketchy business deals and sleeping around and partying.
He became more human, so Nate probably had a better version of him than the rest of us.
Besides that, he's so fucking cute." We both laughed.
It felt sort of good to get all that off my chest. Sometimes thoughts like that got bottled up inside, and they built pressure like a shaken can of soda.
I ripped open a box with a few pots and pans. "Dude, you have a lot of kitchen stuff. Do you have some of those frilly aprons, too?"
Colin threw an empty box at me. We started putting away the dishes. "Hey, bro," I said, "thanks again for asking me to share the place with you. Your offer came at the exact right time."
"Hey, I'm ready to rock and roll in our new place.
Going to be a good time. And for what it's worth, Ro, I never felt like I was more loved or better than you.
You've always been my other half, in good times and in bad, and I hope it stays that way even when we've had our balls clamped like Zander and Jameson. "
"That sounds painful. I think if I could find someone like Nev or Indi, I'd gladly have my boys clamped."
We both stared at each other as we imagined that. Colin bent over in pain first. "Terrible fucking analogy. Never say it again."
"Agreed." I opened the next box and laughed. "Fucking coffee cups with matching saucers. Who the fuck are you, and where did you put my brother?" I pulled out the cup and was immediately reminded of Rachel at the diner. Now she'd be a catch but then who was I to think that I deserved a catch?