Chapter 17
seventeen
. . .
Rachel
"Jack, sweetie, could you go color or read with Nonna?
" Jack had been drumming on the bottom of a pot with a wooden spoon for fifteen minutes while I tried to finish cooking.
After I'd impulsively invited Ronan for dinner, it occurred to me that the apartment was a mess and one small plate of mac and cheese wasn't enough for a man his size.
I stopped at the store on the way home from work and grabbed salad fixings, a tray of fudgy brownies and a bottle of wine.
Mom had heard me trying to convince Jack to give up his new musical career. "Jackie, let's go color."
"Can we color the new one, with the dragons?"
"Absolutely."
Jack threw down the wooden spoon. The pan fell off his lap and clattered on the floor.
Mom picked it up. Somehow knowing that she'd survived what she thought was a heart attack had given her new energy and a renewed interest in her health.
"I only want a small bite of mac and cheese.
I'll eat mostly salad without dressing." I smiled to myself as she said it while at the same time breaking off a tiny corner of the brownie.
Mom came up behind me and squeezed me. "You look happy."
"You act as if I was constantly walking around with a permanent frown and scowl."
Mom turned and leaned against the counter to watch as I cut the greens for the salad. "Not a scowl. But maybe a bit of a frown. But tonight, you have a fresh pink blush on your face, and there's this fun little smile trying to stay suppressed, but I can see it."
I reached for the tomatoes. "It's just a dinner." I lowered the knife for a second and looked at her. "I like him. Not going to deny it. He's got something. Not sure what it is."
Mom laughed. "Oh, I can think of a few attributes right off the bat."
I tapped her arm. "You shallow woman."
"Hey, I'm old, but I'm not dead, and that man is pure masculinity at its absolute finest. Jack keeps asking when his new friend Ronan is coming."
"Jack is my number one concern always. I won't lie. The way I saw Ronan take over with him last night, it made my heart ache. He was a natural, and Jack took to him instantly."
Mom reached over and touched my cheek. "Jack should be your number one priority, but you have to like the man, too. You can't fall for someone just because they know how to talk to a three-year-old. Don't let that and his incredible green eyes be the only criteria."
I sighed loudly. "Again, Mom, I'm not sixteen.
Yes, I was taken in by his looks at first. I don't know how that could be avoided.
He's beautiful. But there's something more about him.
" I looked at her. "I like him. I just don't know how he'll fit in my life.
I'm pretty sure his financial security is even worse than mine, and that's saying a lot.
We can't make a life on a whisper and good chemistry. "
"Why not?"
"Because it's too hard, Mom. It's stressful not knowing if we'll be able to stay in this apartment or when the next car or health catastrophe will happen. It's hard waking up every day knowing I have to work two jobs, miss time with my little boy and still not know if I can pay the bills."
"Then set your sights on someone else, someone who can offer more financial security. Just don't leave your heart out of the equation."
"Nonna!" Jack yelled for her as if she was in the next building instead of the next room.
"Coming, Jackie."
I finished the salad and hurried into my room to shower and change.
I'd considered putting on a dress but decided it was too date-like for a dinner where my son and Mom would be joining us.
I pulled on jeans and a sweater and dabbed on some lipstick and perfume.
I was nervous as hell, and I had no idea how to turn off the butterflies.
Mom was sitting on the floor next to Jack, and the two of them were busy coloring in Jack's coloring book. It would have been a nice peaceful evening; one I'd looked forward to but now I'd added in the butterfly inducing guest.
His knock made the stomach flutters pick up energy. Mom looked up from her coloring page and winked. I took a deep breath and walked to the door. Ronan didn't disappoint, and I wasn't imagining how gorgeous he was. He was positively breathtaking.
He paused in the doorway and flashed me his utterly disarming smile. "You look beautiful," he said.
"Right back at ya," I quipped. I motioned for him to come inside. As he walked past, I noticed the gift-wrapped flat package he had under his arm.
Jack spotted his friend and crayons flew as he leapt over the coffee table to greet him. "Ronan!" he chirped. He ran straight to him, smacked hard into Ronan's legs and wrapped his little arms around them.
Ronan scrubbed his fingers through Jack's thick blond hair. "Hey buddy, I got you something." He withdrew the package from under his arm and handed the gift to Jack.
Jack jumped straight up in the air. He snatched the package and hopped onto the couch.
"Look, Nonna, Ronan got me a present." He ripped the paper off in two seconds and pulled out a dinosaur pop-up book.
Jack's mouth was wide open in joy and surprise as he opened the cover and a giant brontosaurus popped up.
Mom sat next to Jack to read him the text.
Ronan turned to me. "I went through a dino phase—it was short because I got a bicycle and somehow racing around on two wheels made those old fossils a little less exciting.
I went by my dad's place after work and found it up in the attic.
It's still in good shape, which tells you how often I looked at books. My mom sent me that on my birthday."
"Ronan, you can't give that away. It's got sentimental value."
"Nah, we don't do sentimental well in my family. It would have just sat in the attic collecting dust."
"Look, Ronan!" Jack held up the book. "Triceratops. They're so cool."
"They sure are. Coolest dinos in the world."
I took his hand and led him into the kitchen. The second we stepped out of view of the couch I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. "Thank you for coming tonight."
His long lashes lowered as he stared down at my lips. "Thank you for inviting me."
Jack was the main source of entertainment through dinner and keeping up that entertainment level exhausted him. Ronan volunteered to help with the dishes while Mom took Jack in for a bath and bedtime story.
"I'll give you two a little alone time," Mom whispered in my ear as they walked out. "Goodnight, Ronan."
"Goodnight, Emily."
The second Mom and Jack were gone, Ronan put down his dishtowel, pressed himself against my back and wrapped his arms around me. He leaned down to kiss my neck. His touch made me relax, and my knees wobbled.
I put the plate I was holding down in the dishwater and grabbed his arms to tighten them around me. I wanted nothing more than for him to pick me up and carry me off to some lush, quiet place where he could strip me naked.
"Are you thinking the same thing as me?" he asked in a gravelly tone.
I giggled. "Uh, considering what I'm feeling back there against my bottom, I'd say yes. I'm thinking the same thing."
I spun around in his arms and peered up at him. I pushed a strand of dark hair off his face. "In fact, I've probably been thinking about it for a very scandalous amount of my day. Ever since you kissed me this morning. I don't want to lose my head with this, Ronan."
"I've already lost mine, baby." Ronan kissed me again.
His hands circled my ass, and he lifted me up onto the edge of the sink.
He stood between my thighs. I dropped my head back as he left a trail of hot kisses on my neck and throat.
His hand swept under my sweater, and his fingers deftly found their way beneath my bra to my already taut nipple.
He pushed the sweater up and pulled my bra down so my breast was exposed to the warm air of the kitchen. His tongue stroked my nipple.
I tangled my fingers in his thick hair as I held his head against me. Jack's angry shout about there not being enough bubbles jerked us both from the heated moment. Ronan shook with silent and disappointed laughter. I held his head against me a second longer, then he reluctantly lowered my sweater.
"Not exactly the height of romance sitting on a dish sink and listening to awesome little Jack complain about the lack of bubbles," he said.
I took his face in my hands, and he reached up with one hand and held my hand against his face. He closed his eyes a second. "How about we finish these dishes?"
"Good idea and by then Mom will have him in bed. We can sit on the couch."
"I've heard rumor that my moves are even better on a couch than a dish sink."
I laughed. "All right, well I'm holding you to that."
We finished cleaning up, and I took Ronan's hand and led him out to the small front room. Jack's coloring books and crayons were still covering the coffee table. Ronan sat down, reached under his bottom and pulled out a green crayon.
I took it from him and dropped it on the table, then sat down next to him.
"So, where's your other job?" he asked as he pulled yet another crayon out from underneath his bottom. "Think I've stopped shitting crayons. You said it was a night job?"
This wasn't a subject I was interested in talking about.
"It's just a job." I sat up and straddled his lap.
It was my ploy to stop the questions about my job, plus I wanted to continue what we'd started in the kitchen.
It had been a year since I'd slept with anyone, and my last partner was too selfish to be a good lover.
I was happy to break up with him. He'd also set me on my path to leave the dating scene.
I figured it would take someone extraordinary to break that resolve, and I was right.
"Now where were we before the bubble interruption?" I whispered. I lifted my sweater, cradled his head in my hands and brought his mouth back to my breast. My pussy rubbed over the hard edge of his fly and the even harder erection behind it.
I paused to listen for the familiar sounds coming from the bedroom letting me know that Mom and Jack were winding down. I could hear Mom speaking softly to Jack, telling him that he'd been a good boy today.
I sighed dejectedly. "I'm sorry. This is hard, having my mom right there just a few feet away." I climbed off. "Hard to feel sexy with them in the next room."
"Well, you're sexy no matter who's in the next room.
" Ronan turned to me. "My apartment is just ten minutes away, and my brother is in New York, so I know he won't burst in to interrupt us, and trust me, he would and he'd enjoy it.
Maybe we could take a quick detour. Or will it be too obvious what we're up to?
We could tell her we're going out for ice cream. "
I laughed and combed my fingers through his thick hair. "My mom would want a cone. But she won't care if I tell her we're going to your place." I bit my lip. "I guess we could take off for a while since Jack is already in bed."
His gaze held mine for a long moment, and my sense of reason started to overtake my urge to be made love to by this incredible man. "Ronan, I honestly have no room in my life for heartbreak right now. I've got enough things tugging at all my strings."
"I'm right there with you, but I can honestly say, for the first time since I can remember, I'm worried about heartbreak, too. My heart. Cuz you've got me spinning, Ray. I can't stop thinking about you."
I leaned forward and kissed him. "I'll get my coat and let my mom know. Do you have protection?" I laughed. "Never mind. Stupid question. You've probably got a drugstore supply of them in your nightstand drawer." I got up from the couch.
"Well, I'm feeling really cheap right now."
I stopped and looked back at him with a questioning brow.
Ronan shrugged his massive shoulders. "Yeah, I might have a condom or two."