CHAPTER ELEVEN
Lexi looked up in time to see Wilder’s eyes widen. Why had she asked that?
He stared at her, not answering her right away, making Lexi wonder what was going through his mind. She didn’t think he’d considered their time together a date, so she should have just left well enough alone.
Strangely enough, the thought of being on a date with Wilder wasn’t as unappealing as she’d thought it would be. Did that mean she was over Mik?
Because of how their relationship had evolved, she’d never had another boyfriend. She’d never had the experience of dating or falling in love with anyone but Mik. Her heartbreak over what happened with Mik had been a constant in her life over the past year and a half.
And yet, when she was with Wilder, the hurt she’d carried for so long seemed to dim.
It was true that these days, when she thought of Mik, she found herself missing his partnership on the ice more than his romantic partnership in her life.
Unfortunately, Wilder wasn’t a man she could ever consider dating because he was just so different from her. She had a hard time understanding the way he lived his life. With no real direction or focus on the future. She was being forced to live that way right then, and she absolutely hated it.
One of the things she’d loved about her relationship with Mik was that they shared a passion and a drive for skating. And she had no doubt that if they’d been able to stay together, they would have achieved everything they’d planned for their future.
“No. Usually when I ask a girl out, I make it clear that it’s a date.”
“Okay. Good. I just didn’t want there to be a misunderstanding.”
“This is just friends hanging out together. I wanted to show you a bit about the area since you’re new here.”
“I appreciate that. It was a lot of fun.” Lexi searched for a way to continue their conversation. “What’s been the favorite place you’ve visited?”
Wilder’s expression turned contemplative. “It’s hard to pick just one because I’ve enjoyed several locations for different reasons.”
“How about places you don’t want to visit again?”
A smile tipped the corners of his mouth. “Honestly, I’m not trying to avoid answering your questions, but that one is also hard to answer.”
“Why?”
“I’ve had plenty of negative experiences over the years, but none bad enough to keep me from going back to a country where I’ve also had positive experiences.”
“Dare I ask if there are countries you haven’t visited and never will?”
“That one I can answer a bit easier. There are countries I haven’t been to and, as it currently stands, some I never will. Those are places where my personal safety is a concern. My parents worry enough about me as it is. I don’t feel so drawn to visit those countries that I’ll ignore their concerns.”
“Do you already know where you’re going when you leave here in the spring?
Right then, the waitress returned with their meals, and after setting them down, she left them again. Lexi opened her mouth to ask her question again, but then Wilder bowed his head for a moment. She snapped her mouth shut, waiting until Wilder looked up again before picking up her spoon.
“To answer your question,” Wilder said after he’d taken a couple of spoonfuls of his soup. “I don’t have a definite idea. Something usually comes together in the weeks before I plan to leave.”
And there was the proof of how differently they lived their lives. She needed a plan. Uncertainty stressed her out.
“Oh, this soup really is good,” Lexi said, deciding to change the subject.
“Make sure you dip your sandwich in the soup. It’s the best way to eat it.”
Lexi frowned. “Dip my sandwich in the soup?”
“Yep. Trust me. It’s divine.”
She really wasn’t sure it would be, but Wilder’s excitement about it made her want to try. Picking up the thick triangle of sandwich, she carefully plunged one corner of it into the bowl of soup.
After she took a bite of it, she had to admit Wilder was right. “It really does taste good.”
Wilder grinned at her. “Told you.”
Lexi’s stomach flipped a little, taking her by surprise. “Guess it’s important that you have at least one talent.”
That made Wilder laugh, harder than Lexi really thought the comment was worth, but she enjoyed the sound of his laughter. “Never thought knowing that dipping a grilled cheese sandwich into tomato soup was a talent, but I’ll take it.”
As she was introduced to all these yummy foods by Wilder, Lexi wondered what else she’d been missing out on by eating strictly by numbers. She’d have to be careful, or she’d end up gaining weight. Eating high calorie food when she wasn’t training as strenuously probably wasn’t a good thing.
But that was a problem for tomorrow. Right then, she was going to enjoy her soup and sandwich. She almost wished she’d gotten a whole sandwich instead of just a half.
“Do they do takeout here?”
“Pretty sure they do,” Wilder said as he lifted his sandwich. “Wanting to take something home?”
Lexi hadn’t planned to, but now that she’d tasted the food—especially the soup—she thought it was an excellent idea. And it would help solve at least one meal debate in the near future.
“I think I’d like to take some soup home.”
“I don’t blame you. I might do that as well.”
When their waitress returned to check on them, Wilder asked her about the availability of takeout.
“We definitely do takeout,” she said. “Do you want me to bring a takeout menu for you to look over?”
“That would be great,” Wilder told her with a smile.
She came back a couple of minutes later with two smaller folded paper menus. “You can order off the main menu, but we also sell in bulk if you wanted larger portions to take home to share or to freeze. You can take these menus with you too, in case you want to order again. That way you can call ahead.”
Wilder took the menus, then handed one to Lexi. “Thank you.”
“Just wave me down if you want to order something to go.”
As they continued to eat, they discussed the items on the take-out menu. Lexi quickly decided to get two different soups so she could freeze them for future use.
Near the end of their meal, Lexi noticed that the place was filling up. There were all kinds of people coming in. Old, young, families, couples. It didn’t surprise her now that she’d had a taste of the food.
In between greeting newcomers, the waitress stopped at their table to take their orders for takeout.
“Is this all on one bill?” she asked.
“Yes—”
“No—”
Lexi glared at Wilder. “I can pay for my own food.”
“I know that, but I don’t mind doing it.”
It seemed far too much like a date if she let him pay, so she looked up at the waitress and said, “Separate, please. And add a tub of cream of tomato soup and one of the minestrone to my bill. Thank you.”
Lexi thought Wilder might be mad at her for overriding him, but he just placed his own order for takeout. Once the waitress left, he said, “I’m sorry for assuming.”
“It’s fine. I just don’t want you to feel obligated to pay for me when we hang out. You said this wasn’t a date,” she reminded him.
“I did. And it’s not.”
“This isn’t going to be an issue, is it?” Lexi wanted to be sure that things wouldn’t become awkward between them.
“Of course not.” Wilder smiled. “I just thought that since I suggested going for dinner, I should pay.”
“So if I invited you, you’d expect me to pay?”
“Probably not.”
Lexi gave him a quick smile. “So let’s just make a deal that we’ll pay our own ways if we hang out.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I am. There’s no reason you should pay for me.”
Wilder nodded. “I get it.”
“Thank you.”
Lexi appreciated the fact that he wanted to treat her, but she also appreciated that he backed off when she asked him to. Often, she and Mik had butted heads when she objected to something that he’d decided for them both without talking to her. And her dad could be the same way with her and her mom.
When the waitress returned with their takeout orders and their bills, they quickly took care of them, then left the restaurant.
On the trip back to Serenity, Wilder once again did most of the talking. This time, he shared about his life growing up there, how he ended up working at the resort, and he also touched on his faith.
“Do you attend church?” he asked, glancing over at her.
“I used to. My dad made us go to church every Sunday. Well, I guess he didn’t make us go because my mom was a Christian and wanted us to go as a family. I figured out later that my dad wanted us to go because he thought his church attendance would balance out the bad that he was doing behind the scenes.”
Lexi knew that her voice probably betrayed her feelings about her father, but she couldn’t seem to contain it.
“Not everyone who goes to church does so with a heart to worship God. But you shouldn’t let the actions of your dad dictate your own feelings regarding Christians and the church. There might be people who are hypocrites when it comes to God and their faith, but we can’t control them. We can only control our own hearts and actions.”
“Why do you choose to be a Christian?” Lexi asked.
Her mom’s faith had been important to her, and Lexi had never asked her why she’d become a Christian. It was just a part of their life. She thought she’d understood why people went to church. Why they claimed to be Christians. But that understanding had flown out the window when her dad’s actions had been revealed.
Once that had happened, she’d begun to wonder about people’s motives and who she could actually trust in the church or who claimed to be Christians. Even though her mom’s faith had remained steady—and she’d married another man who claimed to be a Christian—Lexi’s faith in God had faltered.
“I’ve been a Christian for as long as I can remember,” Wilder said. “Being raised in a Christian family, I learned what being a Christian meant at a very young age. But as an adult, I’ve chosen to continue to embrace the faith of my parents and make it my own, believing it to be true.”
“Is that the case for everyone in your family?”
Wilder didn’t answer right away, seeming to give her question some thought. “To be honest, I’m not sure about two or three of them. It’s been awhile since I’ve had an in-depth conversation with them about where they are in their walk with God.”
Though they’d attended church regularly, Lexi hadn’t really socialized with anyone from the congregation. However, her mom had. Since she hadn’t worked, she’d built a small community of church friends. Sadly, they had turned on her once her husband’s misdeeds became known.
Being around a whole family who were Christians was something new to her. They weren’t preachy about their faith, but she’d gotten several glimpses of it as she spent time with Kayleigh, Hudson, and especially Wilder.
“If you want to go to church, you’d be more than welcome at ours. It’s the church we’ve attended our whole lives, and Will’s dad is the pastor there.”
“Janessa’s husband?” She was still putting names and faces together.
“Yep. He’s been the pastor there for a long time.”
“I can’t go because I work on Sundays.” It was a valid reason, which Lexi was glad for because she wasn’t altogether sure that she wanted to go, anyway.
“Yeah. I do too. Thankfully, I managed to adjust my Sundays so that I go to work at one. If someone wants to book a one-on-one session with me, they know not to book anything before that time on Sundays. You could probably work out something similar if you wanted.”
“I’ll have to see,” Lexi said, uncertain that she wanted to ask for that just yet.
“If you do decide you want to come to church, let me know, and I’ll get you the information.”
“Okay.” That might not be a conversation that ever happened, but anything was possible, she supposed. Like her dad being a convicted felon, and her losing her whole career.
“Are you going to be here for Christmas?” Wilder asked. “Or will you be with your mom?”
“I’m not sure,” Lexi said. “We never really made a big deal out of Christmas, though we always celebrated. It fell in the middle of the competition season, so I couldn’t take too much time off. I’m sure my mom will want me with her, but I don’t know if that’s what I’ll do.”
“Well, if you’re hanging around here, you’d be welcome to join us for our Christmas celebrations.”
“Isn’t Christmas usually for family?”
“Sure, it’s mainly family, but we’ve always included people who might not have anywhere else to go. Or if they’re a close friend to someone in the family.”
Lexi could only imagine how chaotic a celebration like Christmas would be with so many people present. Her Christmases with her folks had been very low key, and it had been the one day of the year that she hadn’t skated at all. They’d opened presents they’d bought for each other and had a dinner that was tasty but nothing too elaborate, since she was in competition mode and training, so she’d needed to watch her diet.
Her mom had tried to create traditions for them at Christmas, but the only one that had stuck had been the two of them attending a Nutcracker ballet performance at some point during December.
Thankfully, she had a bit of time to see how things went before committing to anything.
“Well, here we are,” Wilder announced as he pulled to a stop in front of her building.
“Thank you again for a fun afternoon,” Lexi said. “It was a nice break.”
Wilder smiled at her. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. We’ll have to do it again sometime.”
“Sounds good.” Lexi pushed open the door. “Have a good evening.”
As she stepped into the foyer of her building, she glanced out the window in time to see Wilder’s car pull away. Smiling, she made her way to the elevator and pushed the button.
As the elevator doors slid open, the man she’d met earlier stepped out. Seeing her, he smiled.
“Alexandra, we meet again.”
“Hello, Colin.”
He was the first neighbor in the apartment building she’d met, mainly because he’d taken the initiative and introduced himself.
“You’ve been out for several hours,” he said, which made her feel a little put off. “I hope you were having fun.”
“I was.” She didn’t volunteer anything more because it felt like he was fishing, and she wasn’t going to give him any information. “And now I need to get a few more things done before bed. Morning comes early.”
“That it does,” he agreed with a nod. Walking backward, he smiled again and said, “See you around.”
She nodded, then stepped into the elevator. Not wanting him to change his mind and join her, Lexi jabbed the button to close the doors, then hit the button for her floor.
Once the door had closed completely, Lexi exhaled in relief. The guy had been super friendly when he’d introduced himself earlier. And he was even friendlier this time around. That didn’t make her feel very comfortable.
She hoped he didn’t become a problem. That would be the last thing she needed in her life. Plus, she didn’t want to have to move. Something told her that apartments of the quality in that building weren’t plentiful in Serenity.
Back in her apartment, Lexi put her soups into the freezer, then went to the bedroom and changed into her favorite pajamas. Now that she was on her own, she relaxed, allowing the smile she’d been feeling all day to come out fully.
It had been a great day. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d enjoyed something that wasn’t related to skating. The time spent with Wilder had been a reminder that there was more to life than training and ice skating.
And with the distraction of the day, she had also not dwelled on whatever was happening with the Christmas program. It had been a nice break from that.
Unfortunately, it couldn’t be ignored forever. Sooner or later, it had to be dealt with. She could only hope that Kayleigh or Hudson had spoken with Alexander that day and gotten some answers for her.
After the relaxing day she’d just had, she didn’t feel as overwhelmed by whatever was to come. Somehow, she knew that Wilder wouldn’t abandon her to deal with it on her own. And she didn’t think Kayleigh and Hudson would either.
It felt weird to trust someone who wasn’t her parents, a coach, or Mik. Hopefully, they didn’t end up betraying that trust the way everyone but her mother had.