Chapter 18
EIGHTEEN
ETHAN
It’s hours later when I hear footsteps.
I’ve kept myself busy clearing the cabin’s driveway now that the snow has finally become manageable, doing everything I can to keep myself from thinking.
So, when I see Ollie showered and dressed in the clothes I found him in more than ten days ago, something squeezes viciously in my gut.
“You’re dressed,” I say like an idiot, as if it’s not obvious.
“Yeah, well,” he smiles awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I couldn’t exactly leave naked. Or with just a flannel on.”
Even though I knew this was coming, my mind refuses to register those words.
Leaving. He’s leaving.
“You don’t have to leave so soon, Oliver. You can stay, give your body more time to rest.”
You can stay forever.
Fuck, I feel like my heart will beat its way out of my chest.
He shakes his head firmly and my heart plummets.
“No. No, I want to go home. I’ve given you enough trouble as it is.”
Trouble? He thinks he’s given me trouble by staying here?
My fists clench as I cover the distance between us in just a few strides and tilt his chin to meet his eyes.
“Never say that again. You hear me?”
His throat bobs as he swallows and then nods.
His eyes hold me captive before I ask, “Is this what you want?”
His breath hitches and for a moment—one endless moment—I think he’ll change his mind. But he nods again.
“Okay,” I rasp out, my voice thick. “Let me grab my keys and I’ll take you home.”
His eyes widen. “You don’t have to, Ethan. You can just take me to the bus stop at the start of the trails and I’ll—”
“I will take you home, Ollie.” I look straight into his beautiful green eyes. “Please.”
I don’t care if I have to beg, he will not leave alone in the state his body is right now.
“Okay,” he says in a voice small and fragile.
I nod mechanically and head to the bedroom to grab a pillow, my steps halting at the sight of the bed, still rumpled from earlier, our combined scents still lingering on the sheets, in the air, everywhere.
My jaw clenches and I get the hell out of there.
Ollie waits for me at the door and we’re in the truck in a matter of minutes.
I hand him the pillow, which he takes, shooting me a questioning look.
“In case you’re uncomfortable on the hard seat,” I tell him and a small blush tinges his cheeks. Almost enough to pull a smile out of me.
Almost.
“Here.” I hand him the warm blanket from the back seat. “It’s still too damn cold.”
He stares at the objects in his lap before his gaze lifts and sucks me in like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
“Thank you,” he says softly, and I can only nod because I sure as hell can’t trust my voice right now.
We have a 40-minute drive based on Ollie’s address and it takes only ten of those minutes for him to fall asleep.
It takes every shred of control that I possess not to brush my knuckles against his cheek, to keep both my hands on the wheel.
I let the low music that’s playing in the background distract me so I don’t do anything monumentally stupid.
Like turn the truck around and take him back to the cabin. With me.
We arrive at the city and his neighborhood way too quickly, and it’s only when I’m almost in his street that he stirs awake, his eyes blinking open, taking in his surroundings.
I pull the truck to a stop at the address he gave me, tensing at the state of the building he’s staying but keeping my face neutral.
Damn it, I can’t worry about where he lives or I’ll never let him out of the truck.
“Is this the place?”
The afternoon sun shines through the window, bathing him in red and I almost miss his answer.
“Yeah, this is it.” He swallows thickly. “Ethan, I—I just wanted to say, thank you. For everything.” And the way he says it like he’s the one who’s grateful as fuck for me finding him, knowing him, taking care of him, instead of me, makes it hard for me to breathe.
I can only give him a smile back before I remember the piece of paper I stuffed in my pocket earlier.
Taking his palm in my hand—a shameless excuse to touch him again—I put the paper inside and close his fist around it.
“My number. In case you ever need anything.”
He looks at me for a long time, or maybe it’s just for a few seconds, and I would kill to know what’s going through his mind.
But everything vanishes when he leans over to my seat and I feel his lips brush the softest kiss on my rough cheek.
He’s back to his seat and opening his door before I can even realize what has happened.
And with one last trembling smile, he’s shutting the door and leaving me behind, like he didn’t just take my heart with him.
My head leans back on the seat’s headrest and I stare blankly through my windshield. I touch the place where his lips were a few minutes ago while my gaze falls on my phone.
I’m placing the call in the next instant.
“Well, I’ll be fucking damned,” a deep, amused voice sounds in my ear the moment the call connects. “Ethan Wilder as I live and breathe.”
“It’s good to hear you, Devon,” I reply, chuckling despite my spectacularly crappy mood.
“Shouldn’t you be saying ‘boss?’”
“You stopped being my boss years ago.”
“True. I just like the sound of it.”
“Good to know your ego hasn’t changed.”
“Ego has nothing to do with it.”
“Yeah, I’m sure. ’You doing okay?”
He exhales harshly. “Let’s just go with ‘yes.’ It will be faster that way. Now, tell me why you’re calling me all of a sudden. Shouldn’t you be hugging a tree or something?”
My gaze catches on the building Oliver has just disappeared into and I swallow.
“I need a favor.”
“Tell me,” Devon says, all hints of humor gone from his tone.
“There’s someone I need you to keep an eye out for. He was being harassed and threatened and there’s a chance he still might be. I need to make sure he stays safe.”
Fuck, even the thought of something happening to Ollie while I’m not with him makes something thrash with rage inside my chest.
“Alright, I’ll take care of it. Who is it?”
Dark curls, sparkling green eyes, and a shy smile flash through my mind and the phone almost cracks in my hand from how tightly I’m holding it.
“I’m pretty sure he’s my mate.”
The line goes so silent that for a moment I think I lost Devon.
“Not that it’s any of my business, but if he’s your mate, why aren’t you the one keeping him safe?”
“It’s… complicated,” I admit in a low voice.
“It’s okay, buddy. Send me his name and address and I’ll put a couple of men I trust on him. He’ll be fine.”
“Thanks, Devon. Keep me posted if they spot anything suspicious. Money is not an issue.”
He laughs.
“I know money is not an issue. I used to pay your paychecks, remember? You’re on the friends and family discount anyway.”
A smile pulls reluctantly at the corner of my lips.
“You’re very generous.”
“That I am. But jokes aside, I’ll make sure he’s okay.”
“I appreciate it, man.”
“I’ve gotta go. Don’t be a stranger again,” he says and hangs up.
I drop the phone on the passenger seat and it lands with a soft ‘thump’ on the pillow and blanket still covering the whole space.
With one last glance, I turn on the ignition and head back to my empty cabin.
Where everything will smell like him, but he will no longer be there.