Chapter 6
CHAPTER SIX
DIXIE
I stand like a spare part as Tripp lays the table, Orla checks on her food and Jorge is sitting at the breakfast bar.
Pacey has just been dragged out of the kitchen like a naughty toddler and sent to bed without supper, Aspen is talking quietly to Orla and Riggs stays away.
Tripp walks back into the kitchen, his eyes skating over me as if he is trying to avoid eye contact and I am desperate for him to look at me properly.
“Can I do anything to help?” my voice sounds hopeful, and Tripp looks up.
“I need to grab some wine, wanna come with?” his brows raise, like he is surprised he has even asked me.
“Sure,” I shrug my shoulder up nonchalantly and follow him out the front of the house, down the porch steps and towards the basement doors.
I stand back and watch as he tugs the rusty bolt across and pulls the doors open. The soft spring breeze dances around us, the sweet smell in the air and I look towards the mountains. The stars kissing the tips, the moon full and round, glowing in all its glory. Turning my face, I see Tripp holding his hand out for me. I can easily step over the lip and onto the step, but I take his hand anyway. It fits perfectly with mine and I inwardly gasp when I feel a lightning shock through me, my blood burning as it rushes through my veins. All the feelings from ten years ago consume me whole in an instance.
Snapping back out of it, I step over the threshold and continue walking into the dark basement when I hear a soft click and the whole under build lights up. I look up and see cute, twinkling fairy lights hanging from the beams.
“Fairy lights?” I ask, turning and looking at Tripp over my shoulder, pausing for a moment.
“Aspen. Scared of the dark. Riggs put them everywhere. He never wanted her to be afraid...” He trails off as we reach the bottom, his feet moving towards the racks of wine.
Sweet move Riggs, sweet. “Do you drink red?” He interrupts my thoughts as his fingers brush against the dusty corks of the bottles.
“I do,” and for some reason, I feel my cheeks burning. Why am I blushing?
“Merlot?” he continues, slipping out a bottle just past it's neck, “or a Rioja?”
“Merlot,” I answer, following him like a needy puppy.
“Or...” He pauses as his fingers dance over to another bottle, “a cabernet?”
“Cabernet.” I love a cabernet. White or red. Cabernet is my wine.
“Two bottles?”
“The whole family is here, so why not,” I step close to him, my nerves tingling from being in close proximity.
“Sound perfect.” He takes his own bottle out of the rack and holds his hand out for me to go ahead of him. We walk back towards the steps in complete silence, and for the first time, I don't feel the tension. I feel at ease.
I turn, smirking as I hold my own hand out for him to take, I don't miss the way his eyes flicker, but soothing as soon as our eyes meet.
He is hesitant, but he takes it, fingers brushing before my hand tucks perfectly inside of his.
Walking back into the house, it all seems calm, but as soon as Tripp notices Riggs, everything changes. I can feel the tension slowly rising and I know I am not going to be wanted here.
“What is it?” Tripp asks, I can hear the nerves cracking in his voice, the way his shoulders are rising and falling a little quicker tells me his heart is racing in his chest. He places his bottle of wine on the countertop, and I mirror him, hidden safely behind him for just a moment.
Riggs eyes lift over Tripp’s shoulders and land on me. That's my cue to leave.
“I'm going to check on Lainey,” I mutter softly, turning and walking away.
Silence rings loud in my ears as my feet lead me to where Lainey is sleeping peacefully. Opening her door, I sneak in and sit quietly on my bed.
I didn't know what to do. Aspen wasn't here anymore. I didn't even see Orla and Jorge but they might be with Aspen?
Who knows.
I reach for the bedside unit, dragging the drawer open and picking up my phone. My heart sinks a little as guilt weighs heavy on my shoulders. I shouldn't be here. I should be staying at Sylvia's.
I was here for one thing and one thing only.
To say goodbye to my daughter’s father and get everything he had.
I check my emails and see a notification from my agent, Lucian. My mood instantly turns sour.
Lucian
Dixie, you can't just run away. I will catch up with you, and let’s be honest, it's not going to be hard to find you.
Turning my phone off, I throw it back in my drawer when I hear Tripp scream and an almighty bang. My eyes widen and land on Lainey, who screams, and I am up, scooping her against my chest to soothe her back to sleep.
I begin to sing softly, dancing around my room, my hand patting her tooshie until I feel her little body fall heavy. Placing a kiss on the top of her head, I lay her back down and cover her with a light blanket. It's not overly cold, but there is a nip in the air during the evenings.
I go to sit back on my bed when I hear my bedroom door open, and I see Tripp’s boot.
“I'm so sorry,” he whispers, wincing.
“It's fine, she's back asleep,” I smile, standing and walking towards the door, closing it behind me.
He nods, but I can tell he isn't really here with me.
“All okay?” I ask, but not wanting to pry.
“Yeah, fine,” he rolls his lips, hands pushed into his back pockets.
“Good,” silence creeps over us, my eyes darting around the large space that we're both just lingering in.
“Dinner is being dished up,” he almost grunts as he walks towards the stairs, and I follow.
When we reach the kitchen, everyone is back. My brows furrow, but it's not my place to speak, so, I keep quiet until I am spoken to.
We take our seats; Jorge says grace and Orla tells us to dish up. Brisket, jus, mashed potato and string greens.
I am starving.
“How was your day?” Jorge asks Orla, and I chew on my mouthful.
The brisket is amazing.
“It was nice,” she smiles, lifting her eyes to me. “We went shopping for Lainey and Dixie and then we all went for lunch at Sunny's, it was a lovely girls day out,” and I can tell that today meant a lot to her.
“It was lovely, I hope you didn't mind me gate crashing,” Aspen looks between myself and Orla.
“Of course not,” I smile, and Orla gives her daughter-in-law an adoring look.
“How about you dear, how was your day?” Orla asks Jorge and he sighs.
“Same old, popped down to see the cowboys. Seems they all got a little rowdy last night, sore heads this morning. Upped their workloads.”
“Dad,” Riggs grunts.
“Someone has to tell them. Where were you today?”
“He was busy having a late breakfast,” Tripp says through a toothy grin and then groans when I am assuming Riggs kicks him in the shin.
“Took the day off, I only work three Saturdays a month now, you know that,” Riggs rolls his eyes as he spoons mash and brisket past his lips.
“Well make sure your guys know what they should be doing, I don't want to have to manage them.”
“I didn't ask you to, that's what Conrad is for.”
“The town farrier? You have put him in charge for the Saturday you're not working…?” Jorge seems annoyed as he lets his voice trail off.
“Yup,” Riggs whistles and I watch Aspen's lips twist.
“Anyway!” Aspen sings, “Dixie, tell us all about you,” her fork and knife get placed down on her plate. “What have you been up to?”
I feel my insides knot.
“Nothing you don't already know,” I half laugh, half cough.
Reaching for my water, I take a large mouthful.
“What's it like being a country singer?”
I inhale heavily.
“Not all it's cracked up to be, I have to find a new agent. I love singing, but it's just not enjoyable at the moment and of course, with Lainey... it's not as easy as it once was.”
“Is her dad present?”
The question feels like a blow to the gut.
“No, he didn't want anything to do with her.”
Lie.
“What an asshole.”
“Language,” Orla scolds Aspen and she giggles.
“Are you glad to be back in Lovelock? What’s the real reason you’re back?” she asks, eyes burning into mine.
“I told you earlier…” I smile softly, my throat thickening as panic claws at my throat.
Is it hot in here?
I take another mouthful of water to try and wet my throat, my tongue feels like it's swollen to the roof of my mouth.
“Aspen,” Riggs half snaps at her, a smirk on his lips.
“What?” she asks innocently, eyes all wide.
“It wasn't too long ago that you were in Dixie's position and my wonderful Ma here was asking you loads of questions...” he trails off and I see the realisation of what was just happening play across her face.
“Oh my god,” she covers her lips with her hands, “I'm so sorry—you're right babe— please, ignore me. It's none of my business why you're back...”
“It's just nice to see you back home again,” Riggs chimes in.
My eyes land on Tripp and his jaw is wound tight and, in that moment, I am afraid his walls have been built up again.
“To Dixie,” Orla reaches for her wine and holds it up.
“To Dixie,” everyone chimes and I feel like a fraud.
The rest of the evening goes off without a hitch, but the tension is still brewing heavily over the Rivera family.
I help Orla clean up after dinner whilst the men all sit in the back office with whiskey and Aspen is drying the plates and putting them back in the cabinet.
The sound of a door opens and closes from upstairs, and I see Orla look up in that direction.
“I'll go,” Aspen offers, placing the drying cloth on the sink unit and disappearing round the corner.
“Is Pacey okay?” I pry, emptying the dirty dish water.
“He will be. Just got a little drunk. We have a lot going on and Pacey isn't coping very well.”
I was a year younger than Pacey, I knew of him, but I didn't know him. The only Rivera boy I really knew was Tripp.
“I'm sorry to hear that.”
“He'll be okay, just need to get the next few weeks out the way,” she turns to look at me and I can see the pain in her eyes.
“If there is anything I can do, please let me know. You've been so gracious with letting me stay here, it's the least I could do.”
“Thank you, Dixie, that means a lot,” she says as she places a hand on my shoulder and gives me a gentle squeeze.
The moment is cut short when Aspen shouts out “Riggs!” and I hear the sound of his feet hitting the floor before we see him.
I give Orla a tight smile as she wanders to where Riggs has disappeared to, and I swipe up the baby monitor and take myself out the front. Closing the front door behind me, I pace towards one of the wooden rockers and settle myself into it. I reach for the blanket box and pull out one of the blankets, covering my legs as I look out to the perfectly clear night. I turn the monitor down so I am not eavesdropping, but the lights stay on so I know if she needs me. And for just a moment, everything feels perfect.
Even though I am fully aware that none of this is.
I had to go and see Lainey's uncle, but I would wait until after the funeral.
Her dad was always in touch, he would have done anything for Lainey, but me and him didn't work. He wasn't a nice man, I instantly regretted my choice when it came to him, but I don't regret having Lainey. She was my world.
I'm not alone with my thoughts long when Tripp walks out onto the porch, completely lost in thought as he steps forward and leans against the wooden railing that runs around the porch.
He hasn't seen me sitting in the corner.
So, I take this as my moment to watch him.
His head is tipped back, hair messy like he has been pulling at the root, eyes glassy as they bounce around the stars.
He looks broken somehow.
The worries laying heavy on his mind.
I shuffle slightly so the chair creeks and his head whips around to see me. Holding my hand up to say hi , he strolls across the wooden floor to where I am tucked away.
“I didn't realise you were out here.”
“I just thought it would be best to take myself out of that situation...” I pick the skin around my thumb nail bed.
“It's a shit show in there,” he huffs, his back against the railings, boot resting on the newel post and hands curled around the rail.
“I'll move into Sylvia's in the morning, you all have so much going on...”
I knew about what Austin was being accused of, everyone did. It's all that has been splashed across the front of the newspapers for the last few weeks. Sure, I haven't been home in years but I still keep up with what's going on.
I even know about the goldmine drama.
Tripp sighs, his defeated brow lifting so he is looking at me.
“You don't have to,” he looks tired.
“I know, but I think it may be best,” I nod and now it's my turn to bow my head.
Nothing but silence surrounds us, and on that last note, he walks towards me and takes a seat in the rocker next to me.
And that's how we sit until the early hours of the morning.
No words.
No noise.
Just each other’s company.