Chapter 11
Aisling
Present day
For the first time since we got here I wake up in the lake house alone.
After our super long hike up the closest of the Larch Peak mountains, which ended with the vastest, sparkliest view of the lake that I’d ever seen, my brother Connell gave me a piggy-back for almost half the return journey, and then we all traipsed lazily for the rest of the trek because after seven hours of working our way through the larches we were all wobbly as hell, which wasn’t helped by the fact that we couldn’t stop laughing.
The only thing that could have made the hike better had stayed behind at the lake.
I force myself upright in my sleeping bag, refusing to let myself wonder why Tanner didn’t join us yesterday. I mean, in the morning I’d definitely thought that he was coming – in fact, I kind of secretly thought that he’d organised the whole trek.
I frown, unzipping the bag with a violent flourish as I definitely do not consider why Tanner didn’t want to come.
I love you, too.
His night-time phone call from a week ago, where his voice was hushed and his tone was gentle, makes something clench tight in my chest.
Is he seeing someone? Someone who he literally loves?
I kick the soft quilt off of me and walk over to the doors of the balcony.
The morning light, shimmering all the way to the head of the lake, is so beautiful that it momentarily thaws my temper. But when I realise that Tanner isn’t by the shore this morning, doing the workout that I’ve grown so used to watching, I’m even more emotional than I was ten seconds ago.
Why wouldn’t he be out here? I mean, okay, we’re kind of the opposite of friends, but I thought that maybe we had some sort of secret understanding that it was okay to feel something as long as we didn’t get too close. Hence quietly watching each other from afar, a literal lake between us.
I fist my hands into the bottom of his khaki shirt, feeling like an idiot.
There’s only one reason why he wouldn’t be out here. There’s only one reason why he wouldn’t care about joining us on yesterday’s hike.
There’s only one reason why he’d rather stay in bed and put an end to our morning secret.
He’s got a new girl in his life.
Trying to push the gut-wrenching disappointment from my mind, I blink rapidly into the golden sunrise and will the stinging sensation away from my eyes.
I mean, this is literally why I pushed him away in the first place. It all happened way too fast and Tanner’s lifestyle is dangerous to a girl like me. Someone who just wants a quiet love-filled life, not the drama and stress that comes with falling for the biggest player in the state.
I rub at the crease in my brow, frown in the direction of Tanner’s cabin, and then turn back to the balcony doors, determined to finally put the last nail in these unresolved feelings.
I rifle through one of my bags so that I can pick something cute to slip into this morning and, once I’ve pulled the denim shorts and grey tank top into place, I start to pad quietly down the stairs. I grab the car keys from the kitchen counter, fasten on my sandals, and head outside.
From under the small canopy at the front of the house the lake looks vast and bright, although there’s something about the picture that seems a little bit different. I purse my lips and tilt my head, but I’m not able to put my finger on it.
Just as I’m heading toward the edge of the porch I see the door to Tanner’s cabin open, and Fallon steps out before Hunter closes the door quietly behind them.
I narrow my eyes.
Closing the door quietly. As if not to awake its sleeping residents.
Fallon instantly spots me and something like a small happy squeal travels across the lake, and she lifts up her free arm, waving excitedly.
Eternally grateful for my best friend, I lift my right hand, waving back.
Beaming, she gestures for me to join them at the logs on the other side of the lake, and just as I step forward I suddenly lose my balance.
My squeal pierces the air, knowing that I’m about to fall over the broken ledge.
But instead of hitting the dirt beneath the porch with a painful thud, I grab quickly onto the wooden railing, steadying myself as it blocks my fall.
My eyes shoot open and I look down at the secure wooden panel.
The railing. It’s fixed.
In fact, it’s completely redone.
I blink down at it with wide eyes and then teeter a few steps backwards. The debris of the old fence has been cleared away, and a whole new wooden porch railing has been carefully cut, nailed together, and erected into place.
The wooden porch is fixed. Falling is no longer a possibility.
I clutch Connell’s keys to my chest as I take a tentative step closer to the porch fence, prodding at it with my pointer finger and ooh ing when it doesn’t wobble an inch. It was so dark by the time that I made my way over here last night, Tristan’s body warming my back as he walked me graciously to the front door.
And I was too distracted in the moment to notice the brand new railing.
The night ended with a kiss on the cheek and a dark hunger in Tristan’s eyes, but we really are just friends so I’m glad that we didn’t do anything stupid.
I turn in a full circle, admiring the wrap-around porch’s new fencing.
It’s perfect.
I lift my gaze back across the lake, one million percent certain that I know who’s behind this huge unspoken act of kindness.
Now I know why he didn’t come with us to the mountains – Tanner literally built my entire wrap-around railing. And it’s so carefully made that it makes something painful twist in my chest. It’s not ostentatious in any way – it’s simply the perfect, rustic, safe necessity that this lake house needed before I finally got to work on the interior.
I twist my lips in contemplation and then make my way to the other side of the lake.
“Hey,” I say to Fallon and Hunter as I jog up to where they’re sat around the logs.
Hunter jerks his chin at me, his cell phone next to his ear, and Fallon pulls away from him momentarily so that she can join me, to Hunter’s dismay.
She’s wearing flip-flops, pyjama shorts, and one of Hunter’s shirts. We both look out across the lake, enjoying the serenity of the blissful summer morning.
“We’re heading over to Carter Ridge today, so that Hunter can help out at his dad’s garage,” Fallon tells me in a hushed tone. “Hence the super early start.”
Hunter talks quietly on his cell, his morning voice deep and husky.
“I was thinking I should go with him, if that’s okay, and then we’d be back by Monday so that I can help you start up on the lake house’s interior.” She gives me a nervous hopeful look as she asks me, “What d’you think?”
I roll my eyes playfully and nudge her flip-flop with my sandal.
“Of course you should go and watch your boyfriend do hot mechanic things over the weekend, Fallon. As if I would deprive you of that.”
She laughs quietly and smiles, cuddling her arms around her middle. “He does look super hot in his mechanic’s vest.”
I laugh with her and swipe my sandal through the dirt, wishing that I had a sexy boyfriend of my own – someone who didn’t want to play the field, completely head over heels for one girl alone.
Hunter Wilde is the epitome of that. I wonder if I’ll ever get my own.
I quietly clear my throat and glance nervously across the lake. The brand new railing seems to sparkle at me in the golden morning sunlight.
“So, um, last night…” I begin, my voice light and cautious.
How on earth do I word this without totally putting my heart out on my sleeve?
“Last night, when you were in… their cabin,” I say, trailing off as I bite into my lower lip.
Fallon slides her eyes over to mine, a mischievous smile on her pretty face. “Yes?”
I swallow and look down at my sparkly toenails. “Was, uh… was Tanner there?”
Fallon looks back out across the lake, smiling as she fluffs her blonde hair around her cheeks.
“Yes,” she says, as if she already knows where I’m going with this.
I hum quietly, eyes still on my toes. “Did he happen to mention, uh, what he did while we were on our hike yesterday? Because I couldn’t help but notice that–”
“Hey.”
Hunter’s deep voice rumbles suddenly behind us. Fallon and I both turn around as he leashes his large forearms around Fallon’s neck.
To Fallon he asks, “You okay if we set off in half an hour? I can grab us food before we head, and we’ll miss the weekend traffic. Journey’ll be smooth, I promise,” he adds, because Fallon gets pretty bad motion sickness.
Hunter and Fallon are painfully cute together.
After smushing a hard kiss on his girlfriend’s cheek, Hunter lifts his head and gives me a smug hockey player smirk.
“Nice fence, huh?” he asks gruffly, eyes flaming with bro-code secrets.
I narrow my eyes on him and he smirks harder. Then I shuffle my feet and slide my eyes toward his cabin.
I clear my throat.
“For… curiosity’s sake,” I begin, a little nervous to be talking to Hunter about this. “Tanner wouldn’t happen to be, like, in there right now would he–?”
Hunter snickers so hard that Fallon gives him a playful slap on one of his giant biceps.
He squeezes her tighter and then glances down at me, giving me a subtle nod.
“Yeah, he’s in there. Probably still asleep ’cause he worked like a dog yesterday.”
I bite my lip, eyes still on the cabin.
“I’m heading into town this morning,” I tell them, anxiously tucking my hair behind my ears. “I’m gonna buy some paint for the house and, uh, probably some pyjamas. But… maybe it’d be polite if I went in there to say thank you–?”
“Yes,” Hunter grunts quickly. “He’d like that, yes.”
I blink up at him in surprise, mostly shocked by how certain he seems, but then I recompose my expression and give him a little nod of my own. “Okay, yes. I think I will.”
I breathe out a shaky exhale and share a what the fuck am I doing? look with Fallon. Her pursed little smile makes me think that maybe everything will be alright.
“See you Monday,” I say to her, before walking nervously toward Tanner’s cabin.
Because, like, what the actual fuck do I think that I’m doing? Tanner and I are not friends, no matter how… easy things felt yesterday morning. After what I learned about him four years ago there’s no way that I could ever feel settled with a guy like that.
Our ‘relationship’ is never going to get past the whole we want completely different things thing, so why the hell is he acting so darn perfect right now?
And why am I using that as an excuse to get closer to him?
I knock softly on his front door and then press my forehead against the wood, my belly pounding with nerves over how much of a bad idea this is.
Stop trying to fix things. Just move on already .
After twenty seconds pass in silence I tap my knuckles against the door again, frowning at the wood as my anxiety turns to irritation.
I mean, regardless of him potentially being the handyman behind building my railing, that doesn’t rule out the possibility of him having a secret girlfriend – who, I quote, he loves . I didn’t actually get around to asking Fallon if Tanner was inside the cabin with someone, even though I’m certain that she would have told me if he was.
Right?
Or should I… see for myself?
I stare down at the door handle, fingers twitching to give it a little shove.
I give it a solid three seconds and then, in the next moment, I’m inside.
My breath catches in my throat as I take in the sight before me, my hands automatically closing the front door, gently so that it doesn’t wake him.
Because there on the immediate left Tanner is sleeping on his bed. Totally alone.
And practically naked.
I stumble back against the door, my cheeks burning as I look at him. Tanner is so tall that he’s half sprawled off the mattress, thick quads kicked apart, with one large foot hanging over the edge. He has a deep golden tan, biceps swollen from yesterday’s manual labour, and he’s wearing absolutely nothing except for a pair of stretched grey boxer briefs.
That his big right fist is shoved right into.
I stifle a squeak of fear as his long hard ridge flexes beneath his underwear, and his chest muscles swell, as if he heard the sound through his haze of sleep.
Nervous and panting, I stay completely still, until Tanner finally relaxes again, grunting quietly as he begins stroking his fist.
In his underwear.
Over his erection.
“Oh my God!” I squeal quietly, immediately squeezing my eyes shut.
I slam one palm over my eyes and whip around so that I can’t watch what he’s doing. But I can still hear what he’s doing and his rough sound effects are making me lightheaded. Like, he is pumping that thing hard . Grunting with every up-thrust, meaty fist slapping against his groin.
Heat whirls low down in my belly as I think why did we ever stop seeing each other again?
I crash into a small cabinet, yelping as I stub my toe against the wood, and with shaking hands, I fumble my fingers around the door handle. I squeak a quick “thank you for the railing” just in case he can hear me over the sound of his building orgasm, and then I haul ass out of the front door, shutting it as quietly as I can behind me.
I really couldn’t have made more noise if I’d tried.
I run the whole way back from Tanner’s cabin to Connell’s truck.