Chapter 5
Chapter Five
Cheyenne
I ate my burger and fries as quickly as possible, barely tasting them. A few more of our teammates came into the bar for celebratory drinks. Everyone was in a great mood despite their exhaustion. We always felt good after a positive outcome.
But I couldn’t force myself to share their joy. Not this time.
“You okay?” Sam asked quietly, slipping around to my side of the booth.
“I’m fine.”
He snorted. “Sure you are. I know you well enough to know better than that.”
I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. “Okay. I’m not fine.”
He was quiet for a minute. “Is this the first time you’ve seen him since—”
“Since he left in the middle of the night? Yeah, it is.” I brushed my hair away from my face, tucking it behind my ears, knowing I must look awful. Still hadn’t showered, hadn’t slept, and the emotions coursing through me over seeing Rhett made me feel like I’d aged another ten years in a matter of minutes. Not exactly the version of myself I’d wanted him to see the first time we saw each other again. But that was life. It never seemed to work out exactly the way I wanted it to.
Sam nudged me. “Wanna talk about it? We can go somewhere else.”
I pushed the last of my food away, unable to stomach it any longer. “No, but thank you. I’m really tired. I’m going to head out, take a hot shower, and settle in for some sleep.”
He closed his hand over mine. “Cheyenne. I remember how he broke your heart.”
I shook him off. “He didn’t break anything.”
But we both knew that was a lie.
I stood in the shower with my face turned up to the hot spray of water, letting it run down my face to hide the tears I resented. Rhett didn’t deserve them.
But they fell anyway.
When the water finally turned cold and I couldn’t possibly have any tears left, I got out and grabbed a towel, drying my face. I wiped the steam from the mirror, getting a quick glance at how terrible I looked before it fogged back up again. Red eyes, puffy cheeks, and the kind of exhaustion sleep couldn’t fix wasn’t a pretty combination.
Just like the day I’d found out he was gone.
I hated that he could still do this to me. Ten years later, he’d somehow found a way to break my heart all over again. I took a deep breath, steeling myself. It was just the initial aftershock, that was all. I was strong. I would put myself back together, and the next time I saw him, it wouldn’t be like this. I’d be ready for it.
What I certainly was not ready for was the knock on my door. I braced myself on the bathroom counter, groaning.
I grabbed a sweater from my closet and pulled it over my head, calling out that I’d be there in a minute. As soon as I was dressed, I went to the door, opening it to find Claire standing on my steps with a bottle of wine in her hand and an apologetic look on her face.
I sighed. “Come on in.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, greeting my dog with a quick belly rub as I locked up behind her. “I didn’t know he was in town, much less that he’d gone to the bar tonight. You okay?”
Claire normally gave me a heads-up when her brother was around, and I’d usually find a reason to stay busy at home instead of venturing out where I might run into him. He never stayed long anyway.
“I’m fine.”
“Liar. You’ve been crying.”
I shot her a look and headed to the kitchen, pulling out two wine glasses. “Nah. Just a hot shower.”
“Right.” She rolled her eyes, kicked off her boots, and plopped down at my kitchen table. “I love my brother, but he makes me so mad sometimes. I don’t know how he could be so stupid.”
My heart warmed at her loyalty. “Let’s not talk about him. Except…” I hesitated, wondering if I really wanted the answer to my question.
“Yeah?”
I poured the deep-red wine into the glass, avoiding Claire’s eyes. “He said he’s staying for a while to help out.”
She nodded. “That’s what he says.”
“How long do you think it will last?”
She bit her lip. “Honestly?”
“Of course.” I faced her, surprised by the worried look on her face.
“I think he’s serious. I don’t think he’s going to rush off.”
“What makes you say that?”
This time, a little grin flashed on her face. “Well, for one thing, the only horse Travis would give him is Diablo, and he’s actually trying to saddle him.”
I spit out my wine while laughing. “You’re kidding.”
She shook her head. “Travis is pretty pissed at him, obviously. Isn’t going to make it easy.”
“Apparently not. Diablo isn’t going to cooperate with Rhett.”
“Exactly.” Her face darkened. “But it’s more than that. I don’t know, Cheyenne. I get the feeling he isn’t telling us everything.”
This time, I frowned. “You think he’s in some kind of trouble?”
She shrugged. “Knowing Rhett? There’s really no telling. But normally, the first thing he does is tell us how quick he’ll be heading out again. Like he doesn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up about him staying for even a week. Always sets the expectation from the beginning that he’ll be in and out—don’t get used to it. This time, it was the exact opposite. He’s even setting up in the barn loft apartment.”
“Hmmm.” I didn’t know Rhett well—not anymore, which was a strange thing considering how we’d once known each other so well that I could read his mind from across the room. But I knew he normally blew out of town as fast as he arrived. It was interesting, that was for sure.
And complicated for me, for both personal and professional reasons.
Claire studied me. “He asked if you and Sam are dating.”
I almost spit out my wine again. “Seriously? Me and Sam?”
She grinned. “Yeah. He looked relieved when I told him Sam has a girlfriend.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know why he’d care.”
Her face turned serious again. “Cheyenne, I don’t know why he left. But I know he loved you. And I don’t think he’s ever loved anyone else since. Maybe—”
“No.” I shut it down immediately.
“If he hung around, you don’t think there’s any chance you two would rekindle things?”
“It’s too late for that. First, we have no idea how long he’s really going to stay anyway. Second, I could never trust him again. Not after the way he left. Third…” I shook my head, not wanting to reveal the truth: that loving him had destroyed me and I’d never risk that kind of destruction again. “I like my life and I’m not looking for more,” I said lamely.
“I figured. So I’m guessing you want me to discourage him if he acts interested?”
“Of course,” I said, picking up my wine and swallowing the rest of it in one gulp.
“Okay.” She rapped her knuckles on my table and stood, grinning. “I’m going to head out. We both need to get some sleep. I’m on shift tomorrow, but I’ll see you Friday, okay?”
“You didn’t even touch your wine,” I said, laughing.
“I only brought it for you.” She tugged her boots back on and headed toward the door. “Stay out of trouble—unless you invite me to go with you, that is.” She gave me an exaggerated wink and tossed her blonde hair back.
“You’re a terrible deputy,” I said, finally giving her a real smile.
“Don’t I know it,” she said, laughing. “Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
I locked the door behind her, grateful she’d stopped by. She was the sister of my heart, and that was something Rhett hadn’t taken away when he’d left.
Despite my exhaustion, I tossed and turned through a night haunted by dreams of the past. The next morning, I decided an early ride was what I needed to put me to rights before I faced what was certain to be a challenging day at work. I put coffee into a thermos, saddled up Wildfire, and hit the trail, climbing to the top of a ridge where the Wyoming plains stretched out in front of me.
Out here, I could breathe again. I slowed Wildfire to a stop, looking out over the land as a sense of peace filled my heart. This was where I belonged. It was the great love of my life now—the wind, the storms, the mountains, the sagebrush that dotted the landscape. The wild ponies, the spirit that flowed through this country. It strengthened me. Made me remember what mattered.
Once, I had wanted Rhett to be my cowboy on a white horse, taking me away from all of it.
But up here, on the mountain that was as much a part of me as I was it, I could see that it was a gift that he hadn’t. That was the problem with young love. It blinded you to everything that really mattered.
And this mattered.
I had a home I loved. Work that filled my soul. A good horse. A faithful dog. Friends.
It was all I needed.
I made a vow to remember that when I had to face Rhett again today.
Travis was pacing out front when I pulled into my parking place at the ranch. He came straight to my window, giving me a motion to stay put.
I ignored him and stepped out of the truck anyway. “What’s up?”
He put his hands on his hips and spit, disgusted. “I figure Claire told you who’s here.”
“She did.”
“You didn’t have to come today. That’s the deal. Anytime he’s here, you get a paid day off.”
I shook my head. “Not this time. Claire says he’s hanging around for more than a day or two. You’re short-staffed with Walker recovering. Besides, you already had to cover for me while I was out on the search. I’m not going to leave you in a lurch today.”
“We’ll manage somehow. You don’t have to be here.”
I put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a little smile. “Thanks. But I happen to like my new job, and I don’t plan on letting him ruin that.”
I’d only recently started working for the ranch, but I loved it. They were completely understanding about my SAR volunteer schedule, and I got to be outside around horses all day and actually get paid for it. Beyond that, I genuinely enjoyed the work.
At first, being back here had been hard. Too many reminders of Rhett. But it had gotten easier. As long as I kept strict boundaries in place—like not coming back to family dinners, no matter how often Naomi invited me—it was fine.
When Travis first hired me, he made me a deal that Claire would give me a heads-up when Rhett was home and I would get paid days off until he was gone. It hadn’t been an issue thus far though, and I had no intention of taking advantage of them now.
I wasn’t a coward. I could work here and ignore Rhett. Besides, he probably wouldn’t hang around for long. It would be fine.
Travis studied me, then nodded. “Okay. If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure. Thanks though.”
“Of course.” His eyes softened, giving me an affectionate look. He’d always treated me like one of his sisters, and I appreciated it. “He asked for a horse to use while he’s here ‘helping.’ I gave him Diablo.”
My face broke into a grin. “Claire told me. That should be fun to watch. As long as you trust him to not do anything that will cause a setback for Diablo, that is.”
“Nah.” Travis shook his head. “Rhett’s got his issues, but he always knew horses. He respects them. That’s about the only area where I trust him not to screw up. Diablo will be fine, but I figure it will help speed up Rhett’s exit.”
“Probably.” I cocked my head. “But while he’s here, you really should put him to work. Take advantage of him wanting to help.”
Travis snorted. “I doubt he even knows how to do a day’s work anymore.”
I winked. “So show him. Might help speed up his exit even more.”
He grinned. “You might be right about that. Maybe I’ll put him on muck duty.”
I fell into step beside him as he turned toward the stables. “So what do we have on the schedule today?”
“Two short tours this morning—two hours each. We’re doing a big lunch here. Then we have a longer group going out for an afternoon tour.”
“Four hours?” I confirmed.
“Four or five if everyone’s having a good time. You good with that?”
“Yeah, I’m good.”
“Great. Beth is going on the morning tours, but I think Jonathan will be your backup this afternoon. It’s a half-day at school and he wants to earn some extra money before prom.”
“Got it.”
I tensed automatically as I saw a familiar figure storm out of the barn, cursing as he kicked a rock down the pathway.
Travis chuckled. “I’m guessing he didn’t have any luck with Diablo this morning.”
I couldn’t join his laughter. The sight of Rhett made it difficult for me to breathe. “Does he know I work here?”
“Doubt it. We all kept quiet about it when he got here— that was awkward. Only one who might have said something is Claire.”
But based on the way Rhett froze when he saw me walking toward him, I knew she hadn’t told him, either.