Chapter 36
We sit at Madeline’s kitchen table, looking out over the back property.
More and more of the leaves have turned, and the woods are aglow with reds, golds, and oranges.
The sky is blue, making the colors even more striking.
She has, somehow, made pumpkin spice lattes and maple scones.
I have no idea how she does it all, running a company, raising a family, maintaining a perfect figure, and preparing café-worthy goods.
Normally I would be savoring this experience.
Autumn is my favorite time of year and this year, I could, in theory, enjoy it to its fullest each day, as I’m not bogged down by a job.
Take a walk, buy pumpkins, paint the landscape.
But I can’t. The latte tastes bitter and the scone, which I objectively know is delicious, crumbles like ash in my mouth.
“Thank you so much for hosting such a wonderful party,” I say. “I should be the one having you over as a thank-you.”
“You are so welcome.” She smiles. “It’s a blast planning it every year and I know how lucky we are to be able to bring the town together like that.”
A flock of geese fly by overhead, black and white bodies in natural formation, honking loudly.
“Are you okay? You seem tired. Sorry, I know that’s a terrible thing to say to a pregnant woman.” Madeline’s eyes flick down to my hands, the fingertips covered in clumsy Band-Aids. She doesn’t mention them.
“It’s okay.”
She looks at me, green eyes intent.
“Topher says you’ve been having nightmares?”
I feel small smack of betrayal. Why is Topher confiding in Madeline? And when? The image of her astride him in the field, hips rocking, comes roaring into focus.
But I’m almost too tired, too overwhelmed, too frightened to care, and I push the image back into the shadowy corners of my mind.
“Yes,” I admit. “They always take place in the woods. In one, I’m running through the woods at night, and it feels like someone is chasing me.
I come to this clearing filled with smoke.
” I shudder, my body still reeling from the dream itself, the feeling of exploding with anger.
“In another, I think I see a giant serpent on the riverbank. It’s hard to see at first. And then I feel a rope around my neck.
I feel like I’m being hung.” I swallow, the scone a rock in my throat.
Madeline is looking at me, her face unreadable.
“It feels like they are showing me something real. Do you think that’s possible?”
She ponders a moment. “I don’t think it’s showing you anything real. I think it is the pregnancy hormones, the stress of being in a new place. People have all sorts of dreams, and I’m sure that the majority of them are common and represent some clear stress or fear you have in your real life.”
It sounds so logical, I want to believe it. But I can’t.
“I heard the local ghost story. About the witch in the woods . . .” I trail off, not sure if there’s a question at the end of my statement.
Madeline looks surprised, or irritated, and laughs shortly. “That’s such a silly story. Don’t tell me a woman as smart as you thinks there’s a witch roaming these woods?”
If it’s so silly, why didn’t anyone mention it before? I think.
“Who told you?” Madeline cocks an eye.
“I don’t remember,” I lie. “So, nothing bad happened here. Nothing?”
“Are you asking if I know of some awful secret? Some murder that what, your family kept buried? Or if I believe there’s a witch in these woods?”
Her tone is sharp, sharper than I’ve heard it. She laughs after a hanging moment.
“Come on, Elinor. You are beginning to sound a bit paranoid.” It comes out in a lilting voice, which I think she means to sound friendly though to me it sounds almost taunting.
When I leave the house a little while later, I replay the interaction in my mind.
Normally perfectly poised Madeline let something slip today.
I definitely felt it, a flash of abrasiveness.
No, I say to myself. I don’t wonder if my uncle was keeping a secret.
But I’m becoming convinced that you are.