Chapter 39
TRACE
James looked as if he was going to puke. I just felt that way. I shivered. Then I thought of something else. Shit. “Can I borrow your hoodie?”
“Of course.” He unzipped instantly, and between him and Edwin, fastened me into it.
Thank the Goddess he wore them baggy. I pulled the hood up and over my face as much as I could.
My fingers shook. This was everything I’d dreamed of for so long, and now it was upon me, I was terrified of rejection.
That really would be the ultimate fuck you from karma if it happened.
But for now, I had to get home and somewhere private.
East London was not ready for this. I wasn’t sure how much surveillance there was in the average street around here, but being caught on even one camera would be one too many.
I bit my tongue to keep my groans of pain to a minimum and let Edwin half drag me along the pavements, James striding anxiously beside us with his hands balled into fists.
I didn’t want to worry him, but I was worried enough for myself. I had nothing to offer to reassure him.
We made it home in a pained blur of hurried footsteps.
I wanted nothing more than to hole up in my carriage with Terrance for company while I waited out the storm I expected was coming, but it was impossible.
Edwin was damn near apoplectic with concern, his hold on his vampire self tenuous if the way he was clenching his jaw was any indication.
I could just see James out of the corner of the hoodie.
He licked his lips nervously. “I think we should call a doctor.”
“No,” I bleated. “They can’t help.”
“Trace, love, I don’t think this is the time for one of your potions,” Edwin said carefully. “I don’t doubt your talents but—” I doubled over as fire raced along my spine, cutting off whatever suggestion he’d been about to make. “Fucking hell, Trace. We have to do something!”
“Garden,” I panted. “Now.”
The boundary wall of dense firs momentarily eased my breathing.
I was safe here. No street lights, no recording equipment, only the trees and bushes, plants and flowers I’d loved and nurtured since I moved in.
I wrenched off my shoes and socks and plunged my toes into the cool earth.
I was a child of nature, and to nature I would turn for solace.
I wrapped my arms around my torso and bowed my head towards the turf.
Of course it was going to hurt. My kind did love to add in reminders when they could, so simple magic this was not.
Edwin was talking to someone, I vaguely acknowledged it was Baxter, via his phone.
No idea what she said back to him, but he made an inhuman screech of disbelief.
“The actual fuck d’you mean, it’s about bloody time?
He’s in agony, Bax. Someone at the Council must know how to help.
He’s a senior witch. What in hell’s name could have made him so sick?
We can’t let him ‘ride it out’. You bloody bitch, I can’t believe you’d say that.
” He threw the phone away and it clattered against a paving stone.
James’ phone blared. He answered. “Baxter? Aye, he chucked it across the garden. He’s steaming.” He listened intently. “Fucking hellfire, you’re serious? Okay, I’ll tell him. Sure. All right. Yeah, bye.”
He ran to my side. “Trace?”
I moaned. “Yes?”
“Baxter said you know what this is and you will be ‘right as rain’ in a bit. I’m doubtful, but she did say it was important to remind you.” He felt for my hand and curled his fingers around my fist. “I’m scared, Trace. I don’t want you to be sick.”
“Not…sick,” I managed. Then promptly dropped to my knees as they gave up the fight to hold me upright.
“Fucking hell. Goddess, I’ve learned my lesson.
You know I have. Please.” I’d been trapped in this disguise for so long I’d managed to forget my true self was taller, with longer legs and torso.
Evidently, I was returning to myself the most painful way the elders could dream up, which did at least explain the agony I was in.
“What does he mean? Which goddess? Who does he even worship, Mother Earth? I’m so lost.” Edwin was back at my side, wiping his muddy phone down his pristine trousers. His sob was a dry, broken thing that tore at my soul. “Please don’t die, Trace. I don’t think I could bear to lose someone else.”
“Not…dying.” I tore at the zip of the hoodie which now felt like a straitjacket. Every stitch I had on was abrading my skin. I had to…get free.
The hoodie hit the dirt somewhere. Relief.
“What the sodding hell is happening to your hair?” Now, Edwin, my big, brave badass vampire, backed up several feet. “Christ, Trace, it’s changing colour as I watch.”
“It’s silver. Like mercury.” James sounded awed. Shit-scared, but still awed.
“The planet?”
“No, you fuckwit, the element.” A bitten-off, disbelieving laugh. “Trace?”
“Mmm?”
“Your hair is legit changing. It’s…” His tone changed, borderline reverent, “…so beautiful, like something from a fantasy film.” He gulped. “Fuck. Is this some kind of hallucination? Have we been drugged?”
I could feel it, the slow transformation from tousled ropes of coarse tangles that nothing had ever tamed, to ripples of perfect silk, slithering over my scalp towards my neck, my shoulders, beyond.
I clawed at my shirt, ripping buttons in my haste to reconnect with my true self.
I needed to feel the weight of the tresses as they hung in a waterfall down my back, the way they had, the way they should.
The way I had, until recently, thought I would never again feel them.
My shirt went the way of the hoodie. Perhaps it wasn’t warm enough to be half naked outside but, I stifled my own hysterical laugh, witches were famously known for going skyclad.
I groped for a connection. James, my brave, gorgeous boy, took my hand again.
“Not a hallucination,” I forced out through clenched teeth. “Ahhh, Christ, this hurts.”
“What can we do?” Edwin crouched on my other side. “You’re frightening me, love.”
“Don’t leave me,” I pleaded. “Didn’t know it would be like this.”
They bracketed me, silent sentinels while I sweated and shivered. Eventually, the universe saw fit to grant me a reprieve. I buried my face in my hands and took a few long deep breaths.
Aaah. And now we faced the first hurdle.
Right now my long hair, my gorgeous rightful hair, was loose and flowing, totally obscuring my face from view.
It felt amazing. I quickly reminded myself that while I could be pleased and happy it had been restored to me, vanity had been one of the reasons I’d ended up imprisoned. Take it easy.
Gingerly, I swept my fingers over my face.
Yeah, definitely not what Edwin and James were used to.
I took another shaky inhale. This was going to take some getting used to, for me as well.
It had been a damned long time since I’d seen my true reflection.
My fingers shook. I just hoped they liked what they saw.
“Eddie, James?” I hated how vulnerable I sounded. And yet, I’d never felt this defenceless, so the feeling fit the situation. “I have to show you something. Please try not to freak out.”
Edwin sat down, right in the soil next to where I was kneeling. “You’re safe with us, Trace. I don’t know what the fuck is going on, but it’s obviously pretty big. Your hair is stunning by the way. Can I touch it?”
“Yeah, sure.” I no longer felt flayed alive, so hopefully touch wouldn’t be painful.
Hesitant digits made several gentle passes through the ends down by my waist before Edwin murmured, “I know it’s not the right time and I’m a hopeless cockslut, but I cannot wait to be surrounded by this while you fuck me. ”
James sniggered. “Time and place, dude.” The air between us shifted as he got nearer. “We won’t judge you, Trace. We told you we love you. Whatever it is won’t change this.”
Easy to say. “Thank you.” Where to start? “I don’t know if I’m able to tell you what happened, but I’ll try.” I really didn’t want to do this. “I was under an enchantment. For years.”
James gasped. “Like, magic?”
I nodded, still curtained from their gazes. “Exactly like that. Fae magic, to be precise.”
“I fucking knew it. Your hair, it’s Fae, isn’t it?” Edwin, his tone strained.
Again, I nodded. “It is.”
“Oh my God,” James stammered. “You’re part Fae, like me? Why would anyone enchant your hair though?”
“I’m betting it’s not just his hair,” Edwin intoned darkly.
“Fucking Fae really can do one, the way they like to lord it over the rest of us.” He rested a hand on my back which should have been soothing but instead sent a ripple of terror through me.
He’s going to reject you once he knows the full story.
“It wasn’t like that,” I countered. Because, all right, it had sort of been like that, but I’d been an arrogant, small-minded little prick back then and thoroughly deserved punishing for my thoughtless ways.
But he wasn’t wrong; we could be ruthless and cold when angered.
Our punishments were often way more severe than most would think appropriate.
“Show us then. Or tell us.”
I sat up, hands still covering my visage. Took one more deep breath, then dropped them to my sides. Both men gasped. I opened my eyes.
James had tears rolling down his cheeks. “Is this the real you?” he asked, his words muffled by emotion.
“Yes, it is. I never meant to mislead you. I was magically bound and unable to speak about this.”
“You’re so beautiful,” he sobbed. “Way, way more gorgeous than Isher. But…but you don’t look like my Trace anymore. You look so much younger too.” He stuffed a fist into his mouth and scrubbed at his eyes. “Nnnnn.” His bewilderment gouged a hole in my heart.
“I’m still me, I promise,” I offered. I glanced at Edwin. “Eddie?”