Chapter 4
CHAPTER 4
As promised, Tuesday was her wedding day.
Georgiana’s heart hammered in her chest as she stretched her hand out toward Ellis. She couldn’t tell if her hand shook or his as he slipped a simple gold band on her finger.
“With this ring I thee wed…”
His voice was warm and steady, and under the wash of early morning sun, he was handsome as ever in his dark-blue bespoke suit.
“With my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods, I thee endow…”
His fingers curled against the underside of her palm, drawing her eyes fully up to meet his. Eyes she had dreamed of for years. But not like this. Never like this.
“In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”
His touch lingered for a beat, even as her eyes daringly peeked at his lips. Ellis never would see her as someone to love, even now.
Broad-shouldered and with a stance that seemed to fill the entire room, he was a man people didn’t cross lightly. His thick brown hair was always just a shade too unruly, and his intense gray-green eyes held a sharp edge—except when they found her. Then, the hard lines of his face seemed to ease, the guarded look slipping just a fraction. He’d run a hand through his hair—a small, almost nervous gesture that hinted at a depth no one else ever saw. His build, solid and capable, spoke of a man accustomed to exerting his will and protecting his territory. But around her, all that strength became something else: a shield, a promise that he’d never let anything touch her.
She swallowed her nerves and returned her attention to the clergyman as the ceremony concluded, and they were led to the vestry to sign the marriage lines in the parish register book.
Her family wasn’t present, only Hester and an employee of Ellis’s, a Mr. Caleb Shaw, served as witnesses.
Shaw was very tall, with brown skin and black hair cropped short to his head. His nose was crooked after years of boxing, or that’s what Esther had told her, a dear friend of Hester’s who helped out in the club’s kitchen from time to time.
Ellis stood to the side as she signed the book, her left hand still shaking from the ceremony. Or perhaps it was the sight of the ring on her hand.
She left one home in search of freedom, only to end up married to the one man she had spent years hoping to free herself from. But Ellis was far too honorable to allow her to ruin herself or her future, whatever it might hold. Everything had changed now.
She was his wife. He was her husband.
“Ye look beautiful, dear,” Hester said, walking up to gather her hands in hers. The older woman smiled, her kind eyes shining bright. “What a splendid day, indeed. Come along. Esther and I arranged a special wedding breakfast for the both of ye.”
“Oh, that is very kind,” Georgiana said. “I’m sure Lord Linfield will want to retire?—”
“I won’t miss our wedding breakfast, Georgie.”
Heat hit her cheeks at how he uttered her nickname, so familiar, around others. She swallowed hard, nodding, her heart breaking over and over again, knowing this would be her life. Yes, she would be safe, and for that, she was endlessly thankful. But he had swept in and rescued her, and now she would need to live out her days married to the one man she adored, who looked at her as no more than a friend at best or a burden at worst.
“We will keep it brief, then,” she whispered, more to herself than to anyone else.
Mr. Shaw said something to make Hester chuckle in the quiet vestry as Georgiana turned to leave. But Ellis reached out, gently steering Georgiana away from the others into an empty hallway.
“Are you well?” he asked.
She nodded, not looking up as he came to stand toe-to-toe with her. She could smell his cologne, a mix of bright bergamot and spice. His fingers still lingered over the sleeve of her best day dress, the very one she wore on her walk across London to the auction. There was no time to secure another.
“Yes,” she whispered, her attention on the feeling of his hand on her body, on the warmth radiating from him to her in the chilly draft of the hallway, the silence sinking in around them, leaving her to drown in her thoughts.
Speak , she thought. Say something. Anything, you foolish girl .
Instead, she remained quiet, the moment becoming too awkward.
“It was kind of Hester to arrange for something. I hadn’t thought…” he said. “Does your ring fit at least?”
His fingers brushed over the top of her hand, sending an overwhelming jolt up her spine. Pleasure, maybe? Anticipation?
“Yes,” was all she managed to whisper again. He pushed the band of gold over her finger, frowning as it slipped.
“No, it doesn’t.”
He licked his lips, drawing her notice of his mouth. Her pulse quickened.
It was all nerves, everything, and nothing to do with his nearness. With his hand on hers in what felt like a stolen touch. Even if he had no earthly clue how hopelessly she loved him.
“You can tell me the truth.”
His fingers pressed just enough to catch her off guard. And for a moment, Georgiana thought he wanted her to confess her feelings for him.
A wallflower through and through, that declaration stayed glued to her lips as she nodded instead.
Ellis studied Georgie’s face, uncertain why it hurt to breathe as his finger skirted over her skin. Her ring was too big. She hadn’t said a word, and he had stood there not too long ago, promising himself to her, and he had meant it.
So why did it feel like there was still some unbridgeable distance between them?
He thought that by marrying her, she would feel safe, and a smile would return to her face. But instead, she only seemed more distant and closed off. Maybe it was because he was tired. He had run the club all night. Hadn’t slept.
Since Ellis was always at the club, he kept his personal quarters a floor above, never having a home for himself.
So today, after he was quite sure the club was done for the day, he met Georgie at the bottom of the stairs, struck by the sight of her there in her gown, waiting for him, her hands clutched tightly in front of her, patient.
He had never married Dinah. They had never shared a wedding day, never mind a wedding night. But he was certain he was messing this up for Georgie. He just wasn’t understanding why or how to make her comfortable.
He released his touch but didn’t retreat. The moment his fingers left her hand, there was an annoying tug in the back of his mind, a loss he couldn’t explain.
“Georgie, I meant what I said in there,” he leaned forward, his voice low and pointed. “I stood there, and I promised myself to you, and I meant it. You are safe, and I will see to it. I will give you everything you want or need.”
She gasped, the faintest sound, just a sharp intake of breath at his words, and once again, he didn’t understand. He was confused why his eyes kept watching her mouth, the pink of her lips, the slight flush of her cheeks, and how her honey-blonde hair made the flecks of gold in her brown eyes spark more in the morning sun.
She was his wife, but they were never to share a marriage bed. It wasn’t like that. This was purely an arrangement. He would see her safe and cared for, and she would... Oh, damn, wasn’t that the problem? She would be safe, and he would?—
He paused again, frustrated, glancing over her shoulder toward the sound of the others in the vestry.
“Georgie, I know what we share from the past is not ideal. I only ask you give me a chance to prove?—”
She held up her hand, stopping his words.
“I came to your club to sell my virtue,” she reminded him, “and you saw fit to marry me instead. I won’t lie. I am thankful for that. But I don’t wish to be a burden. I... I only ask for a small room to stay in until I can find a better arrangement, then I’ll let you carry on with your life. I never meant?—”
“Georgie.”
She stopped, a soft line creasing between her eyes. Her nose wrinkled in frustration.
“I’m not good with speaking,” she admitted, her voice faltering. “I... I’m too nervous, so please just listen when I say this.”
He nodded for her to continue.
“We never spoke about this. About being married. About expectations. I’ll do whatever you wish—Lord Linfield.”
“Ellis,” he said softly, correcting her.
She shrugged. “I am grateful for the kindness you have shown me,” she sighed, “but I never meant to be an imposition either. I came here on my own, knowing full well what I was doing. I was willing to trade my virtue for money so I might secure a future for myself. And now I’ve landed you as a husband, and I—” She slammed her eyes shut. “I don’t know what to make of that. If you must know, I only ask that you are kind because I no longer know what I am to do.”
“You are to live , Kitten.”
Her eyes snapped open at the nickname, but he pressed on, not wanting to stop, even as confusion swirled within him and frustration mounted.
“You can have whatever you want. I am a very wealthy man, and I will stop at nothing to spoil you, to see you happy. You have endured too much, and I think—no, I know—that London should bow down to you for how they’ve treated you.”
“I don’t want to make a scene,” she hissed.
Damn it. That wasn’t the right thing to say.
“No scene, no scandal. Quiet, then, Georgie. This will all be a quiet arrangement. You can have your life, and I will have mine, managing the club. I will see you set up with a suite of rooms, and you can spend your days doing as you wish.”
He stopped, not wanting to tell her how to spend her days, ignoring the cry of mine that echoed in his head just then, which was altogether confusing. He was seven years older and had lived lifetimes over her.
And wasn’t she still the little sister of his best friend?
“Come have breakfast, Georgie,” he said, straightening. Slowly, he stepped back, giving them space, furious with himself and unsure why, knowing all too well that he was married, and he had a wife who couldn’t stomach being near him, much less speak to him.
He would deal with it tomorrow.