4. Mushrooms
Chapter 4
Mushrooms
T he big classroom was still packed with children and their families when Amy and James got back. The crepe-paper Christmas garlands hung limply in the steam from the hot water boiler. Laurie and Harry were over by the window, where Harry was finishing off a cupcake and Laurie was drinking a cup of tea.
‘Did you get your gingerbread man?’ Amy asked Harry.
‘Yeah, and me and Olly both won ducks. Mine’s a Santa duck, and Olly’s is an elf duck. And I ate a shortbread snowman, and a packet of Haribo and –’
‘We don’t need to go into all that now, Harry!’ Laurie smiled brightly.
Harry wondered over to the window and idly drew patterns in the condensation.
‘So, that’s Diane over there?’ James nodded in Diane and Matt’s direction.
Amy turned. At the other side of the classroom by the whiteboard Oliver chatted away with a slightly pompous air, gesticulating confidently and his granny listened intently, hanging on Oliver’s every word and nodding. Matt was looking in the opposite direction, seemingly entranced by the display of Christmas wrapping paper designs on the wall.
‘Yes, that’s Diane. Oliver’s seen us, I think they’re coming over.’ The classroom was crowded and they had to pick their way through the throng of people. ‘You’ll cover for me, won’t you, if she asks about the holiday?’
‘What do you mean, cover?’ Laurie asked.
‘Matt’s told her about the trip to the Lakes, but he’s said that the holiday’s with Harry and his family. He’s never told her I’m divorced and it’s just me and Harry. Maybe she won’t mention it at all. But if she does, please don’t say anything. As far as Diane knows, I’m still married to James.’
Diane waved a couple of little girls out of her path with the gravity of royalty. Matt and Oliver followed behind her, like a pair of footmen.
‘So you’re the family that are sharing my grandson’s Christmas.’ She had a cool, unhurried voice that made her sound like a continuity announcer on Radio Four.
‘This is Amy, Harry’s mum.’ Matt introduced her and Amy held out a hand to shake but Diane ignored it. Her attention was focussed on Harry.
‘Oh my goodness! What is that boy drawing?’ She put down her paper cup of weak PTA tea, as if the shock might have made her drop it.
Harry had progressed from drawing sheep in the steam on the window to drawing a very recognisable phallic symbol. Several of them, in fact.
‘They’re upside-down mushrooms,’ he proclaimed, as Amy hurried over and wiped the window with a tissue from her pocket. ‘What’s wrong with drawing mushrooms?’
‘They’re not mushrooms,’ Amy hissed, taking his hand and pulling him back towards the group of adults .
‘They are! There was this huge one painted on the wall round the back of the Co-op.’
‘Round the back of the Co-op? Deary me, I hope Oliver has never been round the back of the Co-op.’ Diane raised her eyebrows.
‘Dad said it was an upside-down mushroom.’ He glared at his father.
‘I did, but I didn’t expect you to copy it,’ James explained.
Oliver wriggled through the group of grown-ups towards Harry. ‘You drew willies on the window!’ He laughed.
‘I did not , they’re mushrooms.’
‘They weren’t mushrooms, I saw them, they were willies.’
‘And this is the young man you’re going to spend Christmas with?’ Diane asked. She watched Harry carefully as though he was about to explode.
‘Yeah. Me and Harry are going to Elder Fell Farm,’ said Oliver.
‘So, you must be Harry’s father. Pleased to meet you, I’m Diane, Oliver’s grandmother.’ She had looked right past Amy to talk to James and extended a hand for him to shake. ‘And you are?’ She turned to Laurie, on James’s right.
‘This is our friend Laurie,’ Amy said.
‘I work with James,’ said Laurie, glancing sideways at Amy, as if to check she’d said the right thing.
‘And what is it you do, James?’ Diane asked, as if she was interviewing him for a job.
‘I’m a solicitor.’
‘Oh, a solicitor! That’s better. I must say, I was unsure about this whole trip to the Lake District for Christmas, but that changes everything. A solicitor. Why didn’t you tell me James was a solicitor, Matt?’
‘It didn’t seem relevant,’ Matt said, through gritted teeth.
‘If you’ll excuse me, Laurie and I need to get back to the office. We’ve got a big case tomorrow.’ James turned up the charm and smiled his smarmiest smile, the one he saved for short-tempered judges and rich clients. ‘So lovely to meet you, Diane, after everything I’ve heard about you.’ Laurie dug him in the ribs. He was overdoing it.
‘And you, too. I must say, I feel so much better now I’ve met you. If I can’t be with Oliver for Christmas, at least I know he’ll be in safe hands.’
‘ My hands are perfectly safe, Diane,’ said Matt.
‘Of course they are, but … well, you never know about other people, do you, until you’ve met them for yourself. And now I have.’
‘Goodbye, James,’ Amy said firmly, before James could get himself any more involved in the conversation.
‘Yes, we really should be going. All that serious paperwork to do,’ Laurie steered him towards the door.
‘So lovely to meet you, Diane,’ James called back over his shoulder as Laurie marched him out. He was enjoying himself rather too much.
‘Deary me, you can still see those … mushrooms.’ Diane crossed to the window to give it a more thorough wipe. Presumably Amy hadn’t done it well enough for her liking. ‘Oh! Oh, goodness me!’ she suddenly exclaimed.
‘What is it?’ Matt asked. Diane glanced back over her shoulder towards Amy.
‘Nothing. I’m sure it was nothing. There. All clean, not a trace of those revolting things.’
‘So, it really is a willy? Mine doesn’t look like – ’
‘That’ll do, Harry. I think Mrs Tibbitt could do with some help picking up the paper cups. Why don’t you go and help her, boys?’
The three adults watched as the boys went to assist the teacher.
‘I’m so proud of Oliver,’ Diane said. ‘He’s such a clever boy. His mother would have loved to see him perform …’ She trailed off into silence.
‘Yes. Stella would have loved it,’ Matt said, clearly aware that some response was required. ‘Will you two ladies excuse me a minute? I’ll be back shortly.’ He headed out of the room, towards the staff toilets. They were the only two full-sized toilets in the whole building, so the queue was half-way down the corridor.
‘Poor Matt. Still so easily upset at the thought of Stella.’ Diane watched him go, and she sighed, dabbed at her eyes with a tissue, and then turned back to Amy. ‘It’s nice to finally meet Harry.’ She put her tissue away in her pocket. ‘I’ve heard so many stories from Oliver about your camping trip last summer.’
‘I expect you have.’ She hoped Diane hadn’t heard everything Harry had got up to.
‘I can see he’s a real character,’ Diane said, watching him carefully. Thankfully he wasn’t picking his nose right now, as he had been only seconds before. ‘And I’m pleased to meet you too.’ Diane moved closer to Amy, a conspiratorial tone to her voice. ‘Matt has had so many troubles with predatory women you see, since … since …’ Her voice faltered, and she took a deep breath. ‘So, it comes as quite a relief to see you’re clearly happily married. A stable marriage is the most important thing, don’t you think? At least, that’s what my husband always used to say.’
Matt had mentioned Diane’s husband died several years ago. ‘I’m sorry for your loss … your losses …’ she said to the older woman.
‘I understand you’re recently bereaved too?’ Diane replied. ‘Matt mentioned your mother had died at around the same time we lost our dear Stella.’ She patted Amy gently on the back of the hand in what was clearly meant to be a sympathetic gesture.
‘Yes, it was a tragic accident. She drowned trying to save a dog that had fallen into the river.’ Amy withdrew her hand.
‘Goodness me, how brave of her.’
‘It was,’ Amy said shortly. She’d shed so many tears for her mother over the past year and she wasn’t sure they were ever going to end.
‘And your father? Is he still with us?’
‘I … I don’t know,’ she admitted. ‘I never met him. Mum met my dad when he was a student on a Commonwealth scholarship. By the time she found out she was pregnant with me, he’d gone home to Barbados. She never tried to find him.’
‘I see. How unusual. That explains your … your … your beautiful dark hair,’ Diane picked up her cup of tea again, as if to cover her awkwardness.
‘Yes. So … um … What are your plans for Christmas?’ Amy asked. That had to be a safer topic of conversation, surely?
‘I’ll go to church, of course, but other than that I’ll be on my own. You see, Annie, I lost Dennis, my husband, over ten years ago. He was the vicar of Saddleton.’
‘Amy.’ She corrected the older woman. ‘I hadn’t realised you were a vicar’s wife.’ Although now she’d told her it was clear in Diane’s calm air of moral authority.
‘Once a vicar’s wife, always a vicar’s wife.’ Diane touched a simple gold cross that she wore on a chain about her neck. ‘I had been hoping to ask Matt and Oliver to come and have dinner with me, as we did last year, but obviously they have other plans. I must admit I was surprised when Matt told me he was taking Oliver away with you and your family for Christmas, but things change. And life must go on.’ She gave a watery smile, and Amy’s heart went out to the older woman, carefully sipping her tea as if it was in fine bone china rather than a paper cup.
‘It must be very hard for you.’ Amy didn’t even want to imagine the pain of losing a child.
‘Please don’t worry about me. I’ll cook myself a morsel of turkey, although it hardly seems worth it when I’m all on my own. In the afternoon I shall watch the King’s speech to stop me from feeling lonely. I shall share that with people from all over the world.’ She finished her cup of tea and held out the paper cup to Oliver who put it into a black binbag. She gave a brave smile, just as Matt re-appeared from the corridor.
‘I hate to think of you being all on your own on Christmas Day,’ Amy said, politely. ‘It’s a shame you can’t be with us.’
‘When you put it like that …’ Diane watched Oliver and Harry trying to tie the bin bag shut, ‘… perhaps you have a point.’
‘I do?’ Amy wondered what point she had just made. She had only been trying to be polite.
‘What’s that?’ Matt asked.
‘Is there really any reason why I can’t be with you?’ She turned to Matt. ‘I couldn’t ask you and Oliver to drive all the way back from the Lake District to see me, but I could come over to see you on Christmas Day!’ Diane said, triumphantly.