Epilogue #2
“Matilda has given us ladies the option to stay with her, as ladies-in-waiting. It is not something she offers just anyone. She is trading Mistress Agatha back to the empress, but me, she offered a place here.”
“Will you stay?”
“I don’t know.” Lady Alice led her down a corridor. “A part of me wants to so that I could be near Rupert. And I won’t deny that being closer to him will make things easier for us to be together.” She blushed.
Bronwyn grinned in spite of herself. She knew how Alice felt. To have a young man tilt her face up to his and kiss her, to feel his hands entangled in her hair and the touch of his lips trailing kisses down her neck—it was intoxicating.
“Sister Rebecca is staying, to supervise the reconstruction of her former nunnery. You could stay too if you wanted.”
It was tempting. To be there with her friend, with a queen who liked her.
But Bronwyn hadn’t been asked, and if she was being honest with herself, the kitchens weren’t a welcome place for her.
She belonged in the kitchen and yet didn’t feel part of the group.
To stay and work somewhere where she wasn’t welcome, it would make her living there not only awkward, but intolerable over time.
She might as well try her luck returning to Lincoln.
It hit her. She could try returning home and seeing if her family were still alive. She could perhaps revive their bakery and work there. She blinked.
“I mean if I stay, then you would have us, Rupert and I, but of course, you wouldn’t see Theobold. Are you in love with him?” Lady Alice asked. “I think I am in love with Rupert,” she admitted.
Bronwyn smiled at her friend, then faltered.
These walls had prying ears, and she didn’t wish to say too much, in case anyone was listening.
But it tore at her to take even one step away from Theobold.
She loved him. She just didn’t want to admit it out loud.
She didn’t want to be hurt. And something Sir Robert had said had bothered her.
What did he mean when he’d said that Theobold’s choices may not be his own?
Surely, they were. Maybe if she stayed with the empress, they could be together.
Maybe her return to Lincoln could wait just a little while longer. She said, “I should get back.”
“First, the queen wants you. She sent me to find you. She’d sent a page to the kitchen, but you weren’t there, so I offered to look.
I thought you might be down here,” Lady Alice said.
“If the man I loved were down in the cells, wild horses couldn’t drag me away.
Come, I go to her now. We’ll go together. ”
The women shared a smile.
Once she was standing before the queen, Bronwyn watched as Lady Alice, Lady Muriel, and just a pair of guards stood in attendance. They held spears and wore light shirts over hose but had the stances of men who knew their weapons.
The queen wore a slim-fitting blue dress and surveyed Bronwyn.
“I will make no bones about it. You have done me a service and saved the life of Sir Robert. I will not deny that if he had been killed, it would have disrupted our plans, and my husband might still languish in prison.” She nodded her thanks.
“I am glad I could help.”
“Would you like to stay in my court? You would work in the kitchens, of course. I have developed a fondness for your sweet white rolls with honey.” Queen Matilda flashed her an impish smile.
Bronwyn hesitated.
“Isn’t that what you want, Bronwyn?” Queen Matilda asked. “It is only us here. You may be as honest as you wish. Would you like to stay here and work for me? I would treat you well.”
The queen might, but the fellow cooks would not, Bronwyn thought.
Until Master Christopher was replaced, she would never have a moment’s peace and would always have to keep one eye over her shoulder.
And yet, she could not trust the king. He had imprisoned her father for a crime of which he’d been innocent, and her father had almost died in the process.
Could she truly claim allegiance to such a man?
Bronwyn swallowed. But here was a queen, offering her a place in her kitchens. It was an offer that any servant would jump at. Not so long ago, she would have jumped at it. And yet…
“I’m sorry, Your Grace. But I will return to Maud’s court.”
A flash of surprise passed over the queen’s face. Her lips pressed tightly together. She recovered quickly, however, and straightened in her chair. “Why, may I ask?”
“I—” Bronwyn wanted to offer her comfort and reassurance, that it was not her personally she was stepping away from. But she somehow doubted the queen would see it that way. How to save face?
“Oh, but of course, I forgot. Lady Alice told me of the romance you have with a young squire in that woman’s court.” She smiled lightly, but it was strained.
“Yes, Your Grace. Theobold Durville. He is squire to Sir Robert. He’s down in the cells right now.”
Queen Matilda’s eyes widened. “Is he? My word.” This time, her smile met her eyes. “You have no doubt heard that we plan to exchange Sir Robert and the other prisoners from her court for Stephen and his men.”
“Yes, Your Grace.”
“Then I suppose you will be going with them, to stay by your young man.”
“Yes. If that is acceptable to you.”
“Of course it is. I am not your mistress.” Queen Matilda spoke archly, as if Bronwyn should have known better. “Very well. You may go. Safe travels.”
Bronwyn turned to go when the queen bid her wait. “Yes, Your Grace?”
“I wish to pass on a message to her. Your mistress.”
Bronwyn waited.
“Tell her that I have no spy in her court. She won’t believe me, I’m sure. But the treacherous squire Tristan Langforde is not one of my men. I would never have had one go through such charades. I have no interest in underhand dealings.”
Bronwyn looked at her. If what she’d heard was correct, that was exactly what Queen Matilda had done.
The rumors were that the queen, being fed up with the empress’s refusal to acknowledge her messages and requests for a prisoner exchange, had simply written to Sir Robert’s wife, who was in Bristol, looking after the prisoners.
All it had taken was a simple exchange of letters between wives and the matter had been settled, no messengers or armies needed.
There would be a heavily armed exchange taking place somewhere between Winchester and Bristol, near Devizes, a place Bronwyn had never heard of. But that didn’t surprise her.
The queen added, “Maud possesses a foul temper, especially when provoked. Are you sure you wish to return to such a woman?”
Bronwyn nodded. “Yes.”
“Very well. Tell me, do you believe in fate? In preordained action?”
Bronwyn cocked her head. She didn’t know all of those words. “‘Preord…’ Sorry?”
“The idea that some things are already written and meant to happen, as decided by God. Or do you believe we make our own fate?”
Bronwyn had never thought about such things. She’d always lived one day to the next, working. “I couldn’t say, Your Grace.”
“Fair enough. It is a funny feeling I have, this feeling in my gut, but believe me or not, I do think that we will meet again, Bronwyn. I have the feeling you will be in my court. I shall keep a place open for you in my kitchens.”
Bronwyn smiled and curtsied. “Thank you, Your Grace.”
The queen motioned her away and Bronwyn left.
She wanted a place to think and wandered toward the depleted castle gardens, where she breathed in the final aromas of warm summer air.
She hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but then she found herself near two raised voices, and it was rather hard not to overhear.
She blushed when she realized that she was listening to Rupert and Lady Alice.
Bronwyn quickly pressed herself up against the stone wall of the castle and listened. Were she to walk any farther, she would come across them, and it was clear they were having a private conversation. They sat on a wooden bench, hidden by some trees and bushes. But their voices carried.
“I don’t understand,” Lady Alice was saying. “How could you do it at all? I was so worried about you. Why on earth would you defect? It’s dangerous out there. You could have died.”
“I didn’t, Alice. I’m fine,” Rupert said.
“And now, just when we are back together again and safe, now you say you won’t stay.” Her voice rose. “What have I done to you, to make you want to avoid me so?”
“I’m not avoiding you. I would never—” he started.
“Then why won’t you come with me?” she demanded.
“My duty is to my master, Alice,” Rupert said. “I would think that you of all people would understand that.”
“How could you say that? Of course I do. But things are different. We have lived through a siege, Rupert. That must count for something. I have let you…” Lady Alice stopped.
“You have let me steal a few kisses from a pretty woman, but we are not engaged, Alice. And I can’t tie myself down to anyone right now.
I must return to my master, and escort the queen to Bristol.
This prisoner exchange is due to be a major affair.
I cannot miss it to follow you to Maud’s court.
My duty is to Sir Baldwin, and to the king and queen. ”
“I know, I—” Lady Alice was silent for a moment. She took a breath and let it out. “I understand your obligations to your master. I just thought—”
“My master holds the keys to my future, Alice. I’m twenty and should be made a knight next year. I can’t do anything to prevent that from happening, and I cannot advance or do anything without him. I should have been at Bristol all this time, instead of wasting—”
“Is that what you think? That you’re wasting your time with me?” Lady Alice demanded.
“No, I never meant that. I only meant—”