29. 29 Gigi
29
29 GIGI
IRIS
I was in deep shit.
Not literally, thankfully. Though, working in a bar taught me that that, sadly, was not out of the realm of possibility. We’d been on a shit-free streak lately, though, and I was hoping it’d keep holding steady.
God. I disgusted myself.
It’d been two days since I bared my soul to Parker. Up till now, I’d only ever bared my hole to someone. I did not know how to charter this new territory. Part of me wanted to barricade myself behind an iron-clad wall and never come out, while the other part…well, the other part wanted to curl up in Parker’s lap like a lost kitten and let her take care of me. I had whiplash from my own damn desires.
Shoving away from the bar, I marched through the employees-only door. I needed a distraction from said non-literal deep shit. Which was the absolute worst way to think about my feelings for Parker, but I never said I was eloquent.
“How’s it going back here, gentlefolk?” I asked as I entered the kitchen. Artie and Kai were hard at work prepping for open, and they barely acknowledged me. Probably had something to do with the Bluetooth speaker blasting a wicked good pop mix. I watched for a moment longer, smiling to myself as Kai danced along to Natalie Imbruglia’s iconic hit, “Torn.”
Had to add that one to the band’s setlist, I thought, then stopped dead in my tracks. I wouldn’t be adding anything to any set list, because I was not taking the gig. I could not take the gig. No matter how much I wanted it.
Parker’s words echoed through my mind as I uprooted from the floor and headed for the office. She was right: Vaughn would be pissed if he knew. He was an amazing brother. The best human I knew. If he knew how I’d been shoving my own dreams aside to facilitate his…he’d kick my ass in the way only a big brother could.
Which was why he wasn’t going to find out.
I couldn’t sing with Patti Mayonnaise anymore. Not here at the bar, and not anywhere else. At this point, it was masochism, pure and simple. I wanted it too bad. It was playing with fire. If I kept up, if I kept getting on that stage, letting the music reignite my bones, the stage lights on my skin and the crowd’s cheers feeding my soul…I wouldn’t be able to walk away.
And I had to walk away.
The last time I followed these feelings, I ended up oceans away from my family when they needed me most. The last time I led with my heart, my selfish, greedy heart, I’d left more damage in my wake than a hurricane.
I couldn’t let that happen again.
Swallowing the burning disappointment way, way down, I made one more lap around the bar in search of something, anything to do. Something to distract me from the jumble in my brain. Tonight was one of those nights where my presence was not needed. Wednesday night, smack in the middle of the week, and the place was steady. Not weekend busy, but steady. The team was fine. A-okay. Without me.
My crew was a well-oiled machine, barely requiring a tune-up. My shifts at Heathcliff’s had become nothing more than chatting with customers as I circulated the bar searching for something, anything to do. Every now and then, I’d jump in and help the waitresses when it got particularly busy. Or hop behind the bar to lend Dante an extra hand. But…yeah. They were holding it the fuck down.
I was proud. Of them, and of me.
When I came up empty, I ducked into the office for some good old paperwork. No matter how smooth things were going, there would always be paperwork. Settling in, I grabbed a freshly sharpened pencil and opened the top folder, getting to work.
I didn’t know how long I’d been working, staring at spreadsheet after spreadsheet, soothed by the chaotic sounds of Kai and Artie in the kitchen. When I came up for air, I found Parker standing in the doorway.
“Oh, shit,” I said, throwing a hand to my chest. “How long have you been there?” My pulse thrummed erratically, and I wasn’t sure if it was from the scare or Parker. I had a hunch, though.
“Not long.” She smiled and, like my heart was tethered to the curve of her lips, I stood, closing the already short distance between us. “Sorry,” she continued as I put my hand on her waist and pulled her close. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“Best jump scare ever,” I said, breathing in the strawberry of her shampoo and the sugar of her skin. “Hey.”
“Hey,” she whispered back as she looped her arms over my neck. “I missed you.”
Those three little words were sweeter than the most decadent dessert. I savored every one. “Missed you, too,” I whispered, grazing my lips over hers. “I’m glad to see you aren’t buried alive under a stack of books.”
She laughed, a rueful sound, and shuddered. “How did you know that’s my worst nightmare?” She leaned her head back so she could see my face. “Getting so caught up in studying that the wall of papers and books I’ve accumulated caves in on me, and no one knows for weeks, until it’s too late. And, by then, Wilbur will have already eaten my corpse.”
“Oh, my god.” I laughed and pulled her all the way into the office, closing the door behind her. “I think we need to cut you off from the true crime docs.”
Her blue eyes widened. “Not my emotional support true crime docs!”
“Luckily,” I said as I stepped forward until she was backed against the door. “You don’t have to worry about any of that.” I took one last step toward her, our bodies flush now. Her gaze heated, lingering on my mouth. “I’m the only one who’s going to devour you.”
She laughed again, but this time it was a low, throaty sound. “Is that so?”
“Mm-hmm.” I grabbed her hands in mine and pinned them over her head.
She raised her chin to meet my eyes, her chest rising and falling with increasing speed. “S-starting now?” she whispered.
“Now?” I whispered back, brushing my lips over hers, drinking in her quickened breaths. “With so many people right outside this door?”
Her pupils dilated and she arched, ever-so-slightly, into me. I reveled in the delicious dichotomy of Parker. The sweet and the wanton, the unsure and the certain. It was a potent blend, and it went straight to my head.
Leaning down, I kissed her. It was meant to be a short kiss, a singular kiss. I meant to pull away, sit her down at the desk, and ask her how her day was. But the way her lips clung to mine, the way she chased the kiss, killed any noble intentions I had. I claimed her lips again, knees knocking when they opened for me, when she opened for me.
Head spinning, I deepened the kiss, sweeping my tongue over hers, teasing and coaxing and reveling in the magic that was Parker Samuels. I still had her hands pinned above her head, and I used the opportunity to drink my fill of her, free from the distraction of her roaming touch.
Parker, however, was growing impatient.
“Gi—Gigi,” she gasped, bowing her body away from the door, her wrists twisting beneath my hold. “I want…to touch…you.”
“Not now,” I murmured before taking her bottom lip between my teeth. She whimpered. I groaned. “Pretty sure there’s a rule against getting off on the clock.”
“But isn’t— mmm .” Her words were lost as I slid my free hand up the pretty floral skirt she wore, grazing my thumb over her center. “There isn’t,” she tried again, head thunking against the door as I caressed her through her panties. “A rule a-about… oh. ”
I smiled. Color traveled up her neck and spilled over her cheeks like summer roses in full bloom. Kissing one cheek, then the other, I continued to touch her. I could feel her wetness through her underwear, and my own body clenched in response. “No rules about getting someone else off,” I confirmed. “Besides, as long as you’re quiet, they’ll never know.”
As I said it, I moved the soaked scrap of fabric aside and slid my middle finger through her curls, finding her clit. She gasped, then whimpered.
“Shh, baby,” I said, dropping a quick kiss on her lips. “Quiet.”
She bit her lip and nodded. I rewarded her with another finger, parting her, making slow, consistent circles over her clit. I watched in rapt fascination as her dark lashes fluttered against her flushed cheeks, as her teeth pressed into her plush pink lip, as her chest rose and fell with each quickened breath.
“So pretty,” I whispered, heart expanding in my chest. “So, so beautiful.”
The teensiest little whine slipped from her throat, and I crushed my mouth to hers, swallowing it, and every other that followed as my fingers slid into her, as my palm ground against her clit, as my entire world shrunk to only include this tiny room and this amazing woman.
Parker’s legs started to shake. Releasing her wrists, I wrapped her arms around my neck. “Hold on,” I whispered as I looped one leg over my hip and held it there. The new angle gave me the room I needed to properly fuck her. Crushing my mouth to hers, I pulled my fingers out and thrust them back in. Once, twice, three times, grazing her clit with my palm with every return trip.
I was right to kiss her. My lips muffled the helpless sounds she made as she clung tight to me. She arched to meet my every thrust, and somewhere in the back of my mind, I registered the bite of her nails in my shoulders, her heel in my back. But I didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was making her feel good.
“Come for me, Parker, baby,” I whispered against her mouth. “I want to feel you come.”
She dragged my lips back to hers. Her kiss was messy, carnal. Tongue and teeth and gasps until there were no gasps. Until she dragged air into her lungs and held it, sinking her teeth into my bottom lip. She tightened around my fingers. I stopped thrusting, pressing my fingertips against her sweet spot. She nodded frantically, grinding onto my hand, taking from me what she needed.
And I let her.
When she came, it was with a silent, head-thrown-back moan. It was with my name on her lips.
It was with my heart in her hands.
Slowly, we caught our breath. Softly, I slid my fingers from her. Gently, I dropped her foot back on solid ground. When she opened her eyes…when she opened her eyes, when she smiled…it was incandescent.
Stunned, I shook my head both by her beauty and the way my heart expanded beneath my ribcage. “You have no idea, do you?” I said. “You’re everything and you have no idea.”
I don’t deserve you .
She laid her hand against my cheek, eyes so soft, as if she heard my thoughts. Leaning in, she pressed the most gentle kiss to my lips and whispered three words that would be tattooed on my heart forever:
“And I’m yours.”