Chapter 8 #2
I continue reading the messages and shake my head.
The Sirenas, my fans, hate Perla with a passion.
She’s not my favorite person either, especially after she gave an interview where she talked about the worst period of my life—and then accused me of cheating when I could barely get out of bed in the morning.
More concerning is that Luna continues to take a beating online, and the Sirenas don’t cut her any slack.
Maeven says the progress will be slow, and we just need to stay on the course.
The door opens, and I’m looking up as Dr. Jacinda Smith waves me into her office.
Despite being a doctor, her demeanor is inviting.
Must be because her features make her look like a sweet grandma with her button nose, small mouth, and too-big-for-her-face eagle eyes that miss nothing but are also warm.
Her reddish hair and almost matching ensemble of pants and top create a monochromatic look that should be all wrong, but it works.
We sit in opposing rocking chairs near the fire.
“What are we going to talk about today?” she asks.
“I went out on my first outing with Luna.”
Her gaze darts around, like she’s trying to place the name, until she nods. “Yes, the young woman you saved the other day. The one that is playing your girlfriend.”
“Not yet,” I say. “We’re not there yet.”
“Correct. How is she doing?”
I shrug. “She was annoyed and angry today. But that attitude toward me, coming from her, is normal.”
“It doesn’t seem to bother you like your last interaction.”
“Wasn’t too bad. She was…like the night we met before she went nuts.”
“Do you want to elaborate?” she asks calmly, like she is not digging for info to bring up later.
“Maeven made us talk about music. Luna told me she likes my music.”
Dr. Jacinda’s lips twitch. “Is that all it takes?”
Her odd humor always takes me aback, but I find myself chuckling. “Not really. That night we met was cool. She was the first woman I had connected with in a while. She was warm but turned out to be a mirage.”
Her gaze is steady on me as she says, “Well, the two of you are embarking on a joint venture. Maybe this is a good opportunity to get to know her and see why she changed her mind so quickly.”
“Her friend said she had a man. I thought maybe it was guilt. But with everything that’s happening, Adina seems to be the one throwing the most mud at Luna.”
“I like the way you say her name.”
“What?”
She shrugs, and it’s delicate and soft. “Your pronunciation and cadence. Luuunaa. It’s soft and musical. Anyhow, you have her in a place where you can find out. Maybe the two of you can reach a mutual understanding.”
Hell no. “With Luna Santos? I never know what I’m going to get with her.”
“I wonder if she feels the same about you.”
“Huh?”
She presses her lips. “Maybe she feels like she doesn’t know what she really gets with you either. Think about it.” She taps her forehead. “On another note, are you continuing to journal through song?”
I’m still stuck on what she said about Luna, but I bob my head up and down. “Yeah. I kinda like it. It’s easier than that first exercise about writing my feelings. That sucked.”
“Some people hate journaling because they’ve been led to believe there’s only one way to do it.
But there are lots of ways. For creative minds, like yours, expressing yourself in the form of art can be therapeutic.
It provides an outlet and allows you to track your emotions, much like a journey through a significant time in your life. Keep doing it.”
I finish my session with her and head to rehearsals.
I get home by ten, shower, and turn on YouTube.
A flyover of Samaná is recommended on my home screen, and I click on it.
However, as soon as the drone begins to fly over my hometown, Las Galeras, I have to exit the app.
It would’ve flown over our property, and I already have too much on my mind.
It’s been a long day, and these are the times when the memories tend to catch up with me.
Instead, I choose a flyover of Puerto Rico, listening to the sounds of coquis as I work on Dr. Jacinda’s homework.
Abusadora
?Quién te dió el derecho?
To be so beautiful
Y tener por alma hierro
No quiero estar cerca de ti
Pero eres un imán
I want to ignore the way you breathe
No matter how much I try, I just can’t
After spending a day of hell near you
No puedo olvidar los detalles
Your voice still whispers in my ear
Louder than el ruido de la calle
Yesterday, I touched your hand
And I swear you stared into my soul
Mi abusadora me vió tal y como soy
Yeah, you made me feel seen
Baby, mi refleccion en tus ojos fue algo que no esperaba
I wasn’t ready for that.
Es Rio.
Still waters run deep.
I want to fling the notebook at the wall because this is not what I wanted to write. Jesus. Thank God no one will ever see this shit.
My phone pings with a text from Maeven in the group chat with Luna and me.
Maeven
The buzz is starting. Next step, this ship is sailing at the Knicks game.