Chapter Thirty-Eight
Katherine sat in her chair again, no ordinaries or steely-jawed Noctis rep here to take her spot today.
It was just her and Sylvia, like it always had been.
Of course, unlike their usual casual meetings in Sylvia’s office, Katherine was currently tied to her chair by ropes of magic.
They wrapped tightly around her wrists, preventing her from reaching for anything she could use to make a cut.
Not that she would have much luck, even if she did manage to get blood—she’d been in the cell for two days.
Her power, Byron had reminded her gleefully, had been crushed by the wards into a trickle of what it once was.
A few good casts could knock her out for a week.
Still, though, Sylvia was nothing if not cautious, and she’d bound Katherine immediately. She’d dismissed Byron after Katherine was secured. The huff of anger as he stormed out was probably going to be the only bright spot in Katherine’s day.
Sylvia had been sitting there in silence for minutes since the door closed, staring at her bound protégé with a blank face.
Katherine shifted in her seat, the magic rubbing her wrists raw.
She didn’t want it touching her. She knew there was no way she could actually feel Lily in it, but she still swore her smile, her dreams, her pain were crawling up Katherine’s arms. She was quite literally being held down by her own mistakes.
Sylvia leaned back, her body languid. “How are you feeling?”
Katherine let out a wry chuckle. “How are you feeling? Lily’s magic treating you well?”
Sylvia flinched. “I did this to help people.”
Katherine snorted. “You murdered a teenage girl to help people?”
“Noctis was going to take over Aestas. And once the Khatris were in charge, there wasn’t going to be any more helping unsettled witches. They were all going to be left to fend for themselves.”
Katherine surged forward in her seat, the ropes keeping her from being able to lunge for Sylvia’s throat like she so deeply desired. “Lily would have been better off fending for herself,” she snarled.
“She wouldn’t have been. She would have died, or gone to jail, or a mental institution, like so many other unsettled witches have. She would have been alone.”
Katherine clenched her jaw at Sylvia’s matter-of-fact words. It was true. There were no good options. Not for an unsettled witch.
“She didn’t want to be a witch,” Sylvia continued. “She said so again and again.”
“She was a kid, Sylvia. She was overwhelmed and confused. She would have gotten over it.”
Sylvia leaned in. “She begged me to take her magic away.”
“She didn’t beg you to kill her.”
Sylvia literally shrugged. “Mistakes happen.” Katherine’s entire body coiled. “But now, her power can be used to help so many other people like her. She’ll be able to save people.”
“You’re deluded.”
“Maybe.” Joints cracked as Katherine fought against the ropes. Sylvia’s face was stoic as she watched her struggle. “Maybe I made the wrong choice. But I made it, and I am going to make it worth what I gave up.”
What she gave up. Not what Lily gave up.
“Lily’s death gave me enough power to keep Noctis off our backs forever,” Sylvia continued. “Hell, with this power, I could unseat Noctis entirely. We could become the most powerful coven in the country.”
“And what you did to Silas—making him kill his father.” Katherine was so mad she could hardly get the words out. “That was part of your plan?”
Sylvia’s mouth twisted up in a small smile. “All I wanted was for him to snap in public and destabilize Noctis. His emotions determined where and when that happened.”
“But it was a bonus, right?”
Sylvia’s silence was all the response Katherine needed.
“You know how traumatic a snap can be,” Katherine said, her voice low. “How the consequences will haunt him for the rest of his life. And you chose to force that pain on someone else.”
“He could have been strong enough to stop it. I was.”
Katherine’s teeth ground. “Snaps are not because of weakness.”
Another shrug. Katherine wanted to reach out and smash Sylvia’s shoulders down.
“Agree to disagree,” Sylvia said, as casual as if she were discussing the weather. “I gave Silas the weapon; he’s the one who discharged it. I consider it payback. For the trauma his family has inflicted on so many unsettled witches.”
“An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.”
“I never knew you to be one for clichés, Katherine,” Sylvia said teasingly. Like this was just a game.
“And I never knew you to be one for murder. Guess we all change.”
Sylvia leaned back in her seat. “You don’t understand what it was like, Katherine.
I fought for so long to get here, and it was all being ripped away.
My body was betraying me. My magic is the only thing that ever gave me any value.
The only thing that made me worthwhile to those people.
To lose that, to go back to who I was before I got this power … I couldn’t do it.”
Sylvia sighed. “I didn’t mean for this to go this way.
” Her voice was so quiet that Katherine had to strain to hear, almost as if she was talking to herself.
Trying to convince herself that what she was saying was true.
“I knew there was a risk that the spell would kill her, but I thought … I don’t know what I thought.
I guess I thought I was better than that. I thought I could do it right.”
She looked up at Katherine, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. Katherine shifted in her seat, unsure if this display of emotion was real or not.
“I have one goal, and that goal hasn’t changed,” Sylvia said. “I want to help unsettled witches. This power will help me do that. What happened with Vikrant will help me do that.”
She pinned Katherine with a look. “You can still help me do that.”
Sylvia stared at Katherine, willing her to make the right choice.
She had recognized a kindred spirit in Katherine all those years ago.
The girl she found on that bus bench had been young, dirty, and exhausted, but she’d looked at Sylvia with the fire and determination of someone who didn’t know the meaning of giving up.
She had fought to wrangle her unsettled magic, fought to move past the trauma ingrained in her, fought to make a world where no one would have to go through that again.
Sylvia loved her. Admired her.
And she’d ruin her, if that’s what she needed to do to make this world hers.
Katherine leaned forward, as far as the ropes would allow her. Her eyes went soft, her gaze meeting Sylvia’s, and for a second, hope surged.
Until Katherine whispered: “Absolutely fucking not.”
Well.
She’d predicted this, she reminded herself.
Deep down, Sylvia knew as soon as she walked into that bathroom with Lily that she was giving Katherine up.
The distance that had been growing between them, those small inches of space that were clawed away every time Sylvia bent the rules to keep the coven afloat—they became a chasm as soon as Lily’s blood touched Sylvia’s hands.
But the cut was too familiar. Too close to that moment when she was twenty-three years old, when her best friend in the world told her that she was worthless. Years of gluing the pieces of her heart back together, and now it shattered again.
She wouldn’t give Katherine the satisfaction of knowing how deep her knife went in.
Her eyes shuttered, her face hardening. “I’m sad to hear that.”
“Are you?” Katherine forced herself further forward, her eyes narrowing. “Do I still matter to you? Does anyone?”
“I am sacrificing my soul so that unsettled witches can have a better future!” Sylvia yelled, too raw to keep from exploding. “That’s what a leader does. I put my emotions aside so that I can do what I have to.”
“You put your emotions aside?” Katherine scoffed. “I think you don’t feel them at all. I think something inside of you is fucking broken.”
“At least I can get through the day. At least I don’t bury myself in guilt until I can’t accomplish a damn thing. Do you think that makes you strong?”
“You’re unhinged,” Katherine snarled. “You think being able to murder a kid without feeling remorse makes you strong? That makes you weak. Small. Worthless.”
Sylvia surged up and slapped Katherine, hard. Katherine reeled back, her eyes watering.
“I made you.” Bits of Sylvia’s spit landed on Katherine’s face as she spoke. “I fought for you. I found you, protected you, taught you. Raised you. Every bit of my soul I poured into you. And you don’t appreciate it.”
Katherine stared at her, unblinking. “I won’t let you commit murder in my name.”
“You don’t have a choice.”
With that, Sylvia forced herself back into her seat.
She rubbed her hand on her temple, bits of magic sparking at her fingers.
She felt Katherine’s eyes on it. Could hear her unspoken questions—how could Sylvia want this?
How could she have chosen to take this power back, when it caused so much pain?
That was the difference between her and Katherine. Katherine had never been powerless. Katherine had come from a loving family, a stable home where the worst thing that had ever happened to her was a C on a math test. When her unsettled magic flared, she saw it as a curse.
Sylvia knew it was a gift. Knew that having power, no matter how volatile, was infinitely better than the alternative.
“You’ll be tried for Lily’s death,” Sylvia said, keeping her voice as flat as she could. “And you’ll be convicted. You’ll lose your magic. Go to jail. Your life as you know it is over, Katherine.”
Katherine fought at the ropes again, but Sylvia knew she wouldn’t get anywhere. “I’ll tell them it was you.”
“It won’t matter.” Red sparks flared from Sylvia’s hand. “You attacked a coven member without cause. Byron has been parading around telling everyone here what you did, and considering most of them weren’t fans of yours to begin with…”
She paused, collecting herself as she sat in the stark gaze of Katherine’s pain. “One more chance, Katherine,” she said, knowing her protégé wouldn’t take it. “Join me. Help me put an end to the system that has put witches like us down for so long.”
Katherine didn’t respond, but her face made it clear—she would not be joining Sylvia.
Fine. Sylvia had plans, and those plans would be more effective done alone.
She was back to having nothing to lose. Back to it being her and her magic against the world. Back to being free.
And she was going to use that freedom to do something extraordinary. Something that would make her instrumental. Important.
Loved.
She stood and raised her hand, the magic ropes shifting under her power.
“I’m going to do what I have to, and I’m not going to let you stand in my way,” she told Katherine.
“You are going to walk back to your cell without causing any trouble, and then you’re going to sit and wait for the trial where I’ll take away your magic forever.
If you try to resist in any way, I’ll be forced to make sure that Fiona and Tess suffer for your missteps.
” She paused, then added, “And your family too. Your poor parents, that clueless brother of yours. Scorched earth, Katherine. Do you understand?”
Katherine nodded, her face tight. “You’re a monster.”
“Yes,” Sylvia said, acting like Katherine’s words didn’t hurt. “So don’t make me act monstrously.”
Sylvia pulled the ropes away, the power absorbing back into her, rejoining that seemingly endless well, leaving just one keeping Katherine’s wrists tied together.
She walked, pulling Katherine behind her.
Katherine let herself be walked downstairs, let herself be thrown back into that room, let herself be left behind while Sylvia headed out to make her new world.