Chapter 38
Chapter Thirty-Eight
RUE
Istared at the open door, shocked by the intensity of his reaction.
I pictured how he had stared at me, embarrassed that for a moment I had expected his mouth to lower onto mine in a kiss.
I had hurt him, far more than I had ever imagined I could.
My heart ached, now I understood better the depth of the feelings he had for me, and I wanted to cry.
I listened to his hurried footsteps as he descended the stairs to meet the other men. One of them asked whether they were already leaving, and he replied with uncharacteristic snappiness.
Why hadn’t he let me explain what it meant to be a witch and how wrong his assumptions were about us and our way of life?
It occurred to me that if I hurried, I might reach him before he rode away.
I ran out of the door and down the stairs, desperate to put things right between us, partly because I was terrified of having him as an enemy but also because I hated to cause him such pain.
I was halfway down to the hall, unsure where he might have gone, when I spotted my aunt at the foot of the stairs glaring up at me.
‘What’s taken you so long? And what were you doing up there?’ she hissed. I guessed it was her concern about the search that made her sound aggressive.
I ran down towards her. She grabbed my arm, led me towards the kitchen, then swung round to face me. ‘Well?’
I frowned at her. ‘You know why I went up there.’ If I was hoping to distract her by my rudeness I had failed. She was suspicious of me being up there with Theo but I had no wish to explain myself.
She peered at me, her head close to mine as she studied my face, her eyes pausing when they reached my lips. She gave a quick shake of her head as if arguing with herself then looked me in the eye once again. ‘You were a long time.’
I was? It had seemed to me to flash by. ‘Not that long,’ I retorted.
We looked up to the next landing, seeing Theo descending the stairs. He called for his men to hurry and follow him. I heard their footsteps running down to join him as my aunt opened the kitchen door.
‘Quick,’ she said as she pushed me inside, shutting it behind us. ‘Could it be possible that they are about to finish their business with us and leave this house?’
The front door slammed shortly after, making us jump. We looked at each other in shock. Could Theo and his father’s men have finally left? I hoped so.
Seconds later Pierre walked into the kitchen. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to slam the door. I want you to know the Le Cerf man and his two companions have gone.’
My grandmother let out a long, slow breath, sat down at the table and buried her face in her hands. ‘I don’t know how much more of this I can stand,’ she said, her voice muffled and weary.
I hurried over to my grandmother. Then, standing behind her, wrapped my arms around her. I rarely showed her such affection, because she wasn’t someone who gave it, but she didn’t flinch. Almost immediately I felt her hands rest on mine where they lay, clasped together by her right shoulder.
My aunt spoke. ‘Everything will be fine.’
I wasn’t sure if she believed her words.
How could we fight off so dangerous a foe as the Witchfinder?
Then I thought of the other ten women in our coven and felt slightly stronger.
I needed to be brave. Now that Theo knew the truth, my future belonged to him.
I didn’t like to think of someone else having so much power over me, but then I reminded myself that it was not Theo but his father who would decide what happened to me.
‘I’m just grateful the mass, or mould, or whatever it was my mother sent to us, vanished from my bedroom wall before they got here. I’m sure his men would have had something to say to the Witchfinder about that if they’d seen it.’
‘I agree,’ said my grandmother. ‘I’ve no idea how we would have explained that away.’
‘I’m sure Mama could have found a more subtle way to gain our attention,’ I ventured.
Aunt Sorrel laughed. ‘Not Martha. My twin knew how to make an entrance. It seems that even from another realm she is still capable of commanding everyone’s attention.’
But why in such a strange way? ‘Surely we would have known it was her if we had just smelt her usual scent?’ I suggested.
‘Because,’ my aunt said, with her usual authority when it came to discussing my mother, ‘if we had smelt that it would have made us happy, or reminisce about her.’
‘But what’s wrong with that?’ I asked, wishing my mother had chosen to make her presence felt like that.
My aunt and grandmother exchanged amused glances, reminding me how much less I knew about life than the pair of them.
‘We would not have asked questions,’ Grandmama explained.
‘That’s right,’ Aunt Sorrel agreed. ‘The way Martha did it alarmed us. All of us. We had little choice but to investigate its source.’ She shuddered. ‘That mass was revolting.’
‘You still expected me to sleep in that room,’ I reminded them, unable to help myself.
My grandmother sniffed. ‘I do feel guilty about that.’
‘But it could have been dangerous for me. Didn’t that worry you?’
She shrugged a shoulder. ‘I would have sensed anything untoward, if that was the case. You should know to trust me by now, Rue. If we had moved you from that room we might never have discovered the meaning of the mould.’
I didn’t know how to respond.
‘Anyway,’ my aunt added. ‘We were right not to worry unduly.’ She gave a confident nod. ‘And we delved into why it was there. And as we always do when we’re unsure about something or need help…’
I knew what she meant and finished her sentence. ‘We called the coven and set about casting a spell to banish it.’
‘Exactly. My sister was a clever woman, and it seems that she still is.’ My aunt turned away and wiped her eyes.
I liked to think of her as still watching over us. It didn’t surprise me that she had done this, now I had a better understanding of what life was like under the Witchfinder’s nefarious focus. It was probably why even as a spirit she had acted as she did.
‘The main thing is that Martha got the results she intended.’ I saw the joy in my grandmother’s face at knowing my mother was still doing her best for us in times of need.
I smiled at her. ‘Yes, Grandmother.’
I wondered if it was possible that Theo might not change his mind about me, once the shock of who I really was sank in. Maybe he had enjoyed our kiss as much as I had, and feel compelled to forgive me for lying to him all this time.
I hoped, too, that he was emotionally strong enough not to be angry that he hadn’t seen through my lies.
I didn’t know much but I did know that many men would be embarrassed to have been caught out by a woman, and would want to seek revenge for being made to feel stupid.
I didn’t think Theo was that sort of man, but I hoped that he hadn’t fooled me as I had done him.
Now he was on his way back to report his findings to his father. I willed him not to repeat what had happened in the attic, because if he did, it wouldn’t only be me who would suffer.
My grandmother was too worn down by recent events to cope with much more.
I couldn’t bear to worry her further, so I decided not to mention what Theo now knew about me.
I remembered catching him studying the floorboards where our circle had been drawn to cast our spell.
How could he not mention so important a detail to his father?
Surely as the Witchfinder’s assistant he would be compelled to do so.
Nausea rose in my throat and I hoped that the spirits of my female ancestors would do all they could to influence his judgement.
Recalling my mother’s words not to trust ‘a man’, I hoped desperately that Theo was not the man she had referred to.
True, I had disliked him when I first realised who he was, but I had come to know him better, or at least I thought I had. But I had not realised he had feelings for me, and that they must be deep since it had caused him such pain to discover my true identity. I wasn’t sure how that made me feel.
I felt a nudge to my ribs and flinched. ‘What is it, Aunt?’
‘You and I need to go through each room and check they haven’t stolen anything.’
‘You don’t think Theo would do that, do you?’
She gave me an odd look. ‘What is it about that man that concerns you so much?’
Not wishing to increase her suspicion that I was attracted to him, I said, ‘Because despite everything that’s happened, he seems to be on our side. What’s more, I believe he could be my only chance of evading these accusations.’
I could see by her surprise that she hadn’t considered this. ‘Hmm, that is true.’
‘Anyway,’ I continued. ‘We at least know he brought my father here to try and reconcile us all, so he can’t be all bad. The other two were complete strangers and I agree with you: I don’t trust them not to have slipped some of our treasures into their pockets.’
My aunt groaned. ‘As if we three have anything remotely resembling a treasure.’
She was right, but although I didn’t own anything of monetary value, I did possess items that held great sentimental meaning to me. ‘You know what I mean.’
‘I do.’
I rushed up to my bedroom to check my few keepsakes. I picked up the engraved scent bottle my father had given to my mother on her first birthday they spent together. I raised the top and breathed in the faint scent we had smelt earlier in the attic.
Setting it back down on my dressing table, I picked up the string of beads my aunt gave me when I was younger and rested my fingertips on the painting of a rose my mother had done when still a girl herself.
I saw that the pale blue hair ribbon had been moved and wondered why Theo had chosen to inspect it.
I wove the ribbon through two of my fingers and thought back to when I received it, about two years after my mother’s death.
I had been crying because I couldn’t remember my mother’s face any longer, which my grandmother reminded me was very silly, seeing that she and Aunt Sorrel looked the same.
Not the same to me, though, I had argued.
My mother and aunt might be identical twins, but my mother’s mannerisms had been different, as was her voice, and to me she was unique.
My grandmother had not argued but left me to go to her room.
When she returned, she was holding the ribbon, which she said was the same colour as my mother’s eyes.
I draped it over the small wooden dog Jem had kindly carved for me when my little terrier had died of old age three years before.
Everything was still there. I was glad that Theo had taken it upon himself to be the one to check my room and not left it to either of the other two men.
Somehow, even though the thought of him looking through my possessions seemed an invasion of my privacy, I imagined he would have taken care not to delve too deeply into my cupboard and chest of drawers.
He might have a deplorable job, and right now he might also hate me, but Theo was a gentleman.
I hoped he would continue to act as one, even though he now knew the truth about me.