Chapter 22
Ray landed on Ethan with a force that shoved them both several feet back.
Ethan fell hard, crashing into the hearth with a thud that made my stomach churn.
Ray’s paws pinned Ethan’s chest, one of them damn near covering him.
He lifted his head in a howl filled with a terrifying combination of anguish and ire.
I matched it with my own terrified scream.
Had I, once upon a time, thought this would be hot?
I’d been wrong. So, so wrong. I blinked, and in the space of that second, Ethan twisted his body, shifted, and faced Ray.
Wolf to wolf. This wasn’t like the times before, when they circled and dared the other to attack.
They didn’t even pretend to paw the ground.
They attacked. Claws tore and teeth snapped.
The sound of flesh ripping and jaws clamping was deafening.
They were set on destroying each other, and they were going to take the Reading Room with them.
Chairs overturned, fabric ripped to shreds, and wood splintered as they crashed to the ground.
Ethan tossed Ray’s body against one of the bookcases, and it toppled, sending the contents flying around the room.
Stray pages drifted to the ground, split into pieces.
“Cecelia, the codex!” I was yelling, but either she couldn’t hear me or she was distracted.
Her ire rippled through me. Her precious Mardi Gras decorations had been trampled.
A seemingly small thing, except they were one of her only methods of expression.
They may as well have set the place on fire for how it affected her.
I ran around them, barely dodging Ethan’s rump, and braced myself in front of the fireplace. I threw a protective bubble over the codex. “I thought you had a No Dogs Allowed policy!”
That, she heard. Her fear was my own. She’d been unable to control them, unable to keep the shifts at bay. Helplessness washed over me. If they continued, they were going to destroy so much more than property.
The Twins, Brianne, and Lauren had reached the top of the stairs. Drawn in by the mayhem, they watched in horrified silence. Poor Lauren’s eyes rimmed with tears, her fingers steepled at her mouth. How many times had she worked to prevent this from happening?
Ethan swiped at Ray, sending him slamming into the balcony banister. It cracked under the pressure. If it gave, Ray would fall to the ground and land directly on top of Brianne’s desk. I had no doubt they’d continue the fight downstairs.
And maybe that’s what did it. Maybe it was the threat of poor Bri, who was already under enough pressure, having to clean her office space again.
Or the Twins, who already had enough construction woes, having to reconfigure anything.
Or the fact that I’d admonished Lydia for talking about a client in the lobby but was now standing by while they brought the house down.
I’d given them too much leeway. I cracked, just like that banister had. But I wasn’t gonna break either. I was damn sick of their childish feud. If they were going to behave like animals, I was going to treat them like animals.
“Cecelia, can I please have a newspaper?” My voice was surprisingly calm, especially given that I was shaking like a damn leaf in a hurricane.
She dropped the Sunday Times, the biggest edition she could find, no doubt, into my hand.
I pressed it to my legs and rolled it into the tightest coil I could manage.
Then I stomped right up to the two wolves, who’d taken a moment to circle each other and catch their breath. They were nearing fifty, after all, and even wolf shifters only had so much stamina. Lifting my arm, I turned to Ray and then to Ethan.
“No! No!” I swatted their noses with the paper, two short raps to get their attention. “This is bad wolf behavior. Bad!”
They stared at me, eyes wide. I was trembling from head to toe, but I held their gaze firm. “Sit!”
Both boys slammed their butts to the ground, ears flattened to their thick heads. The cacophony of battle stopped as quickly as it had begun, leaving a strange echo in the room. My breath rushed loud in my ears, one of the only sounds to punctuate the silence. Until Lydia stifled a nervous laugh.
Ethan growled in her direction. I held up my finger. “No. I’m talking.”
“We’re gonna, um, go check on that thing.” Lauren ushered the rest of the coven down the stairs, damn near shoving a protesting Lydia, who was apparently starved for entertainment. The wolves, still shocked by my dominance, remained in place while they filed out.
This was a familiar sensation to me by now.
The pressure building in my chest as emotions and words rose to the surface.
The understanding that I was not currently in control of what I did or said.
The magic, or my subconscious, was going to speak.
And it was always best if I stepped aside and let it.
I was kind of eager to hear what I had to say.
“First things first. I’m not going out with either one of you until you work out this ridiculous, childish feud. I’d told myself I wasn’t going to date you while the past still lingered. I should have stuck to that.”
Ray let out a whimper.
“Hush!” I pressed one finger to his snout.
“This is silly, little wolf. Ethan was your closest friend. And the only one who could have possibly understood what you were going through.” I swallowed hard, hoping my voice wouldn’t break.
It broke anyway. “I didn’t even know. Because you didn’t tell me. ”
The corners of his eyes angled down. He dipped his head in acknowledgment.
“We aren’t in high school anymore,” I continued.
“And that’s a good thing. Because all of that high school crap is colored with our hazy memories and unsteady emotions.
Ray, we didn’t know each other. Not really.
We had enough of a common bond to form a connection that I fully acknowledge was intense.
I loved you so much I couldn’t breathe from the weight of it. ”
I paused, letting myself stroke his fur. “But we never had a future. Not back then.”
He pressed his head into my hand. My fingers dug in, and with no small amount of reluctance, I dropped my hand.
“Ethan, we had a great friendship. But it was built on dishonesty.” My fingers itched to touch him, too, but I held my hand at my side lest I risk setting Ray off again.
And boy, did that piss me off. “You never told Lauren we hung out. And I never told Ray. And I still can’t figure out if it was really to protect them or us. ”
I dropped the newspaper. “All of that was thirty years ago, guys. Thirty years! We either have something now, based on who we are today, or we don’t have anything at all.”
I began my own pacing, picking up books and placing them back on shelves as I went. Could Cecelia have cleaned it all up? Sure. But it was keeping my hands busy.
“And while we’re discussing it, I’m not a child. I’m the Supreme. I value your opinion, but I don’t need you to solve every problem for me.” I jabbed at Ethan’s chest. Ray smirked. The fucking wolf smirked.
“And I don’t want you being all possessive and broody every time another man looks in my general direction.
Everyone walks on eggshells around you to avoid setting you off.
That’s ridiculous.” My arms flailed out to encompass the room.
“Why should the rest of us live in fear of your inability to act like a mature adult? If you go all feral every time someone says Ethan’s name, that’s on you, not them.
Like it or not, he’s one of my best friends, and I have no intention of losing that. ”
Whoa. Both wolves flinched at my statement. Ethan’s muzzle trembled the slightest bit. Had I just friend-zoned Ethan? I’d have to sit with that when this was over. The initial wave of wrath was receding, taking the last dregs of my adrenaline with it.
“I’ve half a mind to force you two to stay here until you work this shit out.” Ethan stood then, angling his back leg toward me, where the briefcase-shaped markings that adorned his hind were visible in contrast to his fur. I sighed. “But Ethan has court, and I’m not an asshole.”
Unable to stop myself, I hugged them both, wrapping my arms around their huge necks and holding them close. In that moment, I wished fervently that I was one of those women who didn’t choose. Who could have her gang of men. But it wasn’t who I was.
“I can’t be part of the animosity between you two any longer.” I stepped away, deliberately putting distance between us. “I’m sorry I added to the tension. Truly, that wasn’t fair of me.”
I walked toward the stairs, understanding that I was leaving something incredibly important behind. My steps were sluggish, as if I carried something heavy. And I suppose, in my own way, I was.
“You both mean the world to me. But if I’m being forced to choose, my answer is neither.”
I flicked my hand, transporting them both outside, then surveyed the damage. I was so tired of repairing this room.
“We’ll do it together, Cecelia.” And, one item at a time, we did.