Chapter 1
One
I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Never estimate me.
—Bernice’s secret thoughts
Bernice
“Are you sure?”
I looked at my brother, Creed, and said, “Listen, Creed. I’m going to be perfectly fine, okay? I swear to you. I don’t want to live the rest of my life without you.”
My brother, my sweet, doting, big-as-life, caring brother, melted.
“Just promise me if you start having trouble, you’ll let me know. I can’t help you if you don’t let me know stuff is happening.”
I sighed. “Creed, I’m fine.”
I’d moved to Sawtooth, Montana, after Creed’s new wife, Birdee, had gone against his wishes and informed me that he was, in fact, not dead.
He was very much well, living in Sawtooth, Montana, and had joined a motorcycle club.
Though this was after he’d broken out of prison, staged his death, and then escaped.
Some nice man named Apollo had created him a new life here, and he’d had to change his appearance and lay low.
Now he was a game warden and lived in a big, beautiful house, the exact opposite of the kind of house we’d grown up in.
When we were small, Creed had to step up and take care of me after my mother decided it was more fun to do drugs and work the streets than it was to be a mother. Creed had been taking care of me my entire life, and it was time to show him that I was a big girl and could take care of myself.
“But…”
“Creed.”
I looked at my sister-in-law and thanked her with my eyes.
She winked.
I gathered my things from my brother’s fancy kitchen table and shoved everything into my various pockets.
It was nearly June, but you wouldn’t know it.
Not with the fact that there were still piles of snow nearly everywhere. Plus, the mountaintops would apparently still have snow on top of them at least until mid-August. If not through the entire summer and fall.
I was both excited and terrified out of my mind.
I hoped that my body would allow me to live here.
When I was a child, I found out that not only did I have anemia—a very mild form of it that constantly kept me cold and eating red meat every meal—but I also had asthma.
The asthma wasn’t a mild form.
The asthma was intrinsic. It was triggered by whatever the fuck it wanted. Cold air. Stress. Getting sick. A light summer breeze.
You named it, I had an asthma attack.
It was also fairly severe, and I was often fighting to keep it under control with my medication.
Luckily, my asthma doctor was willing to see me remotely, seeing as I was now moved halfway across the country.
I wouldn’t be sharing what my doctor thought of the move to one of the coldest states in the US of A.
Creed would probably agree with him and send me back home kicking and screaming.
“On that note,” I said. “I’m headed back home.”
“How are you liking it?” Birdee asked as she fell into step beside me.
Creed grumbled as he followed behind, still on the ‘you shouldn’t move here’ kick.
We both ignored him as I talked about the house.
I’d signed the lease on the house that she’d just recently moved out of.
It was a great location, only a few minutes’ walk from the place where I would now be working, and there was some great eye candy four houses down and across the street from my own.
Unfortunately, the house also came with issues.
Those three issues being Lanny, Patrick, and Kurt Huber. The father and his sons who lived across the street from me were disgusting and thought it was fantastic to call me a “hot piece” every morning they saw me.
I was anything but a “hot piece.”
I was skinny, small, and frail looking at the best of times.
Having severe asthma meant that I couldn’t go and work out the way that I would love to do, because stress caused asthma attacks. I was also cold all the time, so I wore a lot of layers. Then there was the way my hair—auburn and long, almost to my butt—needed a trim.
However, I couldn’t go into places that smelled. So that meant I couldn’t go get a haircut due to all the chemical smells. Nor could I get my fingernails done or go into places like Bath & Body Works that had tons of competing smells.
I was, essentially, in my own sort of jail. Though instead of keeping me in, my asthma kept me out.
“The Hubers aren’t giving you any trouble?” Creed asked, voice disgusted.
I decided not to tell him that they asked me to show them my titties today and instead said, “They’re being quiet so far.”
Lies.
But he didn’t need to know that they gave me the creeps.
I signed the lease for three months, which would hopefully give me time to find my own place.
In the meantime, I’d just buck up and not share that they were gross.
“Never were when Birdee lived there,” he grumbled. “Maybe it’s because she was so mouthy to them.”
Birdee snorted. “Oh, fuck off, Creed.”
Creed laughed and pulled her into his arms, and I was stunned at the change that came over his face.
Birdee was so good for my brother.
I was happy to see him finally happy, after all these years.
If anyone deserved to be happy in life, it was him.
“I’ll see y’all tomorrow,” I said. “Come into The Mercantile, and I’ll make you a sandwich.”
“Bye, sis,” Creed drawled as he yanked me toward him and gave me a back-breaking hug, the way only brothers could do.
I could do nothing but hold on until he let me go.
That only came when Birdee whacked Creed on the arm for crushing me.
I coughed slightly, and he looked at me worriedly.
I ignored him and walked to my new truck.
It was large, had four-wheel drive, and was expensive.
Three features that I’d never had before, but Creed had insisted that I get.
Something reliable with great safety features, that would also do great in the snow and ice.
Those things cost money, and I’d had to shell it out.
I was now ten thousand dollars lighter and writing a car payment the size of a mortgage once a month to a company for a car that depreciated the moment I drove it off the lot.
“Love you!” I called as I opened the door and locked myself in.
I immediately started it up and hit the heated seat button.
That sucker was definitely worth the upgrade.
Cranking the heat up a few degrees, I started to drive.
Then I squeaked when I remembered I also had a steering wheel that heated as well.
Hitting that button, I drove home, away from Creed’s fancy place in the woods and into civilization.
I loved Creed’s place.
Loved even more that it was outside of town.
But I also loved the convenience of living so close to food and people.
If I lived alone out in the boonies and something ever happened to me thanks to my asthma, the paramedics’ response time would be significantly longer.
It took me ten minutes to get home, and most of that time was spent letting my mind wander about the rest of my life.
What would it look like in ten years? Would I ever meet anyone? Would I ever get my asthma under control? Would I be able to find a job to utilize my nurse practitioner license up here in Montana? Would I have kids?
Pulling into my driveway, I threw it into park, then prepared myself for the cold once again before swinging open my door and getting out.
Of course, one of the Hubers was outside.
I didn’t actually know which of them was which, seeing as I tried really hard not to learn things about people that I didn’t like. But one of them came to the edge of his yard with a beer in his hand and called out to me.
I ignored him and walked to my front door.