18. New Information
NEW INFORMATION
Ivy—May
Pulling up at the Carragan Ranch was starting to feel like a fully embraced routine, which was both exciting and terrifying when thought about.
It’d been two weeks since Oliver asked for my help, and so far it had been the easiest routine for me to slip into.
I didn’t show up and doubt myself. Rude customers didn’t bug me.
In fact, the hardest part was deciding what sort of dinner we were choosing to surprise Oliver with when he finished working on nights he was caught up with whatever it was cowboys did in real life.
He’d told me a solid four times now that cooking wasn’t part of my job—which I knew. But Sunny had to eat, and I still didn’t want to go home. So I stayed and cooked.
Sometimes Aspen and Rowan came over. Sometimes Ember and Wyatt showed up, each Carragan sibling taking a moment to slide through the front door and see their favorite nephew.
On the other side, though, things with Todd were tumultuous, and I still wasn’t sure the best way to even begin to work things out with him. I’d tried. I’d talked to my mom about it. I’d talked to Aspen about it. Nothing they’d suggested helped.
Date nights. Sex—Aspen’s idea, of course.
Bringing back up the issues resulted in more fighting, and I was tired.
He blamed his foul mood and distance on his father relapsing.
I blamed it on his drinking and him growing into the same man as his father.
Another statement that had blown up into a massive argument where he left and I didn’t see him for three days.
So no. I’d rather be at the Carragan Ranch, cooking for my new boss and his son after hockey practice. Was it healthy to avoid the confrontation and the issues we held? No. But here I was.
Sunny and I finished dinner just as the front door opened and Oliver walked in.
“Dad! We made fish tacos!”
Oliver smiled at him, his arms wrapping around Sunny’s head as he kissed his forehead. He opened his mouth, but I held a hand up to stop him.
“I know! I didn’t have to, but I did anyway.
We also made a fancy mango slaw to go with the fish tacos, and honestly, for a video recipe from a random girl on the internet?
It’s pretty damn good. Even Sunny likes it, and don’t tell him, but it has vegetables,” I explained, loudly whispering the end as if it was a massive secret and he didn’t chop most of the vegetables up himself.
Oliver smirked, shaking his head in disbelief. “Well then, I’ll just wash my hands and make a plate, I guess. Are you going to join us?”
That was another thing—I avoided Oliver Carragan as if he were carrying a disease.
An airborne disease that was only contagious to me.
So I made dinner, timed perfectly for him to walk through the door thanks to Rowan’s text updates, and then I made myself a to-go bowl, saying there was no way I could stay. I was so busy. So. So. So busy.
I left the Carragan family, whomever was there, to see Oliver and talk about his day at work and eat whatever food Sunny and I had made.
It was safer that way. Better even, because then Todd couldn’t be right.
Not that I believed he was. He wasn’t. Oliver barely tolerated me and only offered me this job because Sunny loved me.
Sunny’s own words, actually. He said he’d told his dad how much fun we’d had when I’d taken him to practice, and I was way less busy than his aunt Aspen, so he should just ask me all the time.
Behold. A job created by the resident ten-year-old, and not his grumpy cowboy father wanting to bend me over this countertop and fuck my brains out. That was just my imagination being absolutely unhinged.
Said cowboy was currently staring at me, an arched brow, and I realized he was waiting for an answer.
“Oh, thank you, but I couldn’t impede. I have?—”
“I know, so much going on,” he interrupted with the same sentiment I’d give a dozen times now. “The offer still stands, either way. You deserve fresh tacos too.”
I stared into those blue eyes of his—the color unnatural against his sun-kissed skin.
“I’m going to go get cleaned up. I’d really love to see an extra plate at the table, Ivy.” He wasn’t commanding me to stay, but my affection-deprived brain was choosing to read the command between the lines, so to speak. He wanted me to stay.
I felt myself nod, unable to conjure more words to speak beyond that.
“So does that mean you’re going to stay?” Sunny asked, the excitement clear.
“For a little bit. But I can’t stay long, okay?”
He nodded, grabbing me a plate from the cabinet and setting it on the other side of his dad. The three of us were sitting around the table together within a few minutes, eating fish tacos with mango slaw that Oliver complimented three times while he ate.
“Next time I’m making us margaritas to go with the fish tacos, and no, I won’t hear complaints about it,” he said with a small smile thrown my way.
I shook my head. “Won’t hear one from me.”
“So, tell me about this book page I keep hearing so much about,” he casually commented.
Mid-taco bite, my eyes shot up to his. “What do you mean?” I mumbled through a bite, which only brought a chuckle from him.
“Book page. Aspen mentioned it the other night while she was over and I was curious about it. She sent me your page, and now I’m asking the owner of said page.” He arched a brow at me, and I felt myself nodding.
“She has her Kindle with her at every practice,” Sunny explained. “We even stopped the other night so she could take a photo of a book with the sunset in the back. I helped.”
“I mean, it isn’t anything crazy. I just enjoy reading”—my eyes shot to Sunny, and I decided to edit my words carefully—“a great deal of books and sharing about them. I like talking about indie authors the most. They don’t tend to get the exposure of the bigger authors with massive publishing companies.
Plus, making pretty content for them and raving about how great their stuff is is fun. ”
He watched me, listening intently while he took another bite of his taco. “Makes sense. Any favorites right now?”
“Cowboys,” I said before I could think better of it, the blush creeping up into my cheeks. “And werewolves. They’re, um, great too.”
Another brow arched my way, and I wanted to sink into my seat and pass of mortification. I seriously said fucking cowboys.
Sunny chose that moment to get up and take his plate to the sink, rinsing it off himself and all.
“Anyway, what about you? All ranch life and no fun?” A change of topic was a necessity at this point. I couldn’t fathom talking about myself for another moment while I finished eating.
“Making book girls blush is moving up my list,” he said quietly. “But other than that, I like movies. Fantasy, sci-fi, dystopian type stuff.”
“Yeah, Sunny mentioned your Star Wars obsession,” I confessed.
“He likes werewolves too, Ivy,” Sunny chimed in once more, back at the table.
“Quite a bit you seem to know about me.”
The blush was going to be a permanent fixture on my face at this rate. Finishing up my last bite, I got up to grab my plate and his as he finished. Space was clearly what I needed, but his fingers wrapped around my wrist.
“Perfectly capable of cleaning up after you cooked, Ivy,” he said gently. It could’ve been a whisper, a sweet caress, had the words been different. But even in those words, they still sounded like a sonnet falling from his lips.
I released his plate and nodded, willing my heart to restart and maybe continue to beat at a normal rate once more. If he felt my pulse speed up beneath his fingers, he didn’t show it. “Of course. Yeah. I have to get going, anyway. I’m supposed to stop by and see my mom before I go home.”
Oliver nodded, his eyes still intent upon me as he finally released my wrist. “Of course. Hudson can help me clean up.”
“Good. That’s good. Anyway. He did great tonight with everyone.
Beck has him playing right winger a lot lately, so it definitely could be his final position for the season, but we’ll find out.
I sent you the videos already. So you have those.
And, um, I’m gonna head out,” I rambled, before biting my tongue and forcing my mouth to shut.
He gave me a small smile. One that was controlled and perfect in his own Oliver type of way. “Good night, Ivy.”
Nodding quickly, I grabbed my bag and headed out the front door, yelling bye to Sunny on my way out. I even slipped my plate in the sink before I left. I may not have washed it, but I still had a semblance of manners, heart problems and all.
I spent the short drive to Mom’s house reminding myself to breathe and checking my mirror to ensure I didn’t look as flushed as I felt.
He’d touched me—something we both seemed to avoid like it was part of the job. I hadn’t touched him since that night at The Raven when he’d carried me to safety. A night I’d done my best to forget, but it still chose to haunt my dreams instead.
And our second dance…the one I actually remembered all of fully, included the way his fingers felt along my bare skin, the small movements branded into my mind.
It wasn’t as if I was in love with the cowboy. I didn’t even know him. But lust? Yes. I’d read too many novels about men who looked like him to feel any other way. He was the definition of sex on a stick out West.
I groaned as I pulled into the driveway.
An extra car was parked behind Dad. The car that could only belong to one person.
I genuinely contemplated trying to quietly pull out of the driveway and just going home, but before I could, the front door swung open and Mom walked out with a smile on her face.
“Fuck,” I mumbled, plastering a smile across my face as I climbed out of the car. “Hey Mom!”
Walking up the path towards the door, she wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug. My mom was the same height as me. Same light blond hair and green eyes. Same small stature and bubbly personality.
“Hello, my darling girl! Your sister is here too! She surprised us. Actually took some time off work, can you imagine?” She chuckled as she left her arm around my shoulder, and we walked into the house.
My parents still lived in the same house I grew up in. A small one-story with white siding and a matching white picket fence. Three bedrooms and enough decor on the wall to commemorate every moment of mine and Tessa’s childhoods.
We walked through the entryway and into the kitchen where Dad and Tessa were seated at the dining room table, coffee cups in hand that I knew contained caffeine-free tea if my sister had any say in it. Mom let me go, and I walked over, kissing Dad on the cheek and sitting next to him.
“Hey guys,” I said, my voice sounding quiet and unsteady.
“All my family together. I’m thrilled.” Mom smiled before anyone else could speak a greeting. “Ivy, do you want some tea, baby?”
I shook my head. “No thanks, Mom. Just a glass of water will work.”
It wasn’t that I hated my sister, but we weren’t best friends by any stretch of the imagination.
Tessa was everything I always thought I’d be and then simply wasn’t.
She was tall with blond hair so bright it looked silver in certain light.
Her eyes literally resembled emeralds. It wasn’t natural, but it was, and I hated it.
She’d gone off to the east coast to college, becoming some fancy lawyer.
Literally the youngest at her firm to climb the ladder, apparently.
She was smart as a whip, noticed everything, and looked like a damn supermodel. I’d spent all of my teenage years just trying to live up to half the girl she’d been when she’d been here, only to always fall short.
“Little late for you to be dropping by, right?” Tessa questioned. Her tone was casual, but of course, my anxiety read into it.
I wanted to roll my eyes, but instead I just shrugged. “I told Mom I’d be by after work. Sort of random for the lawyer to miss work in the middle of the week and drop by, right?”
Mom chose that moment to set my water down in front of me as she took the seat next to Tessa.
“Oh, George, some things never change. Your sister had some time off from work for once and wanted to come home and visit. She’ll only be here about a week.
You two should make some plans while she’s in town. Introduce her to Aspen!”
“Is that the one engaged to the Carragan cowboy?” Tessa asked. “I saw it on social media.”
I nodded. “Rowan. My other friend, Ember, is engaged to his twin brother.”
Tessa looked momentarily surprised. “Wow. Don’t remember you having this many friends last time I was home.”
“Well, you’ve been gone for a while.”
She smiled. Her shiny white teeth annoyed me as I tried to swallow down my jealousy.
“Are you still dating that guy? Tim?”
“Todd,” I replied. “Yes.”
Dad took a sip of his tea. “How’s work going, Ivy?” He looked over at Tessa before continuing. “Ivy has a new job as a nanny. She’s helping the eldest Carragan boy with his son. Oh, and she’s doing some coaching at the local rink as well.”
She took this new information in stride, but I started talking before she could make some sort of comment that would annoy me more.
“Good, Dad. Sunny had camp tonight. The coach has him playing right winger a lot, but I think they’re going to swap him for some defensive positions next week to see how he does.” My anxiety eased as I talked about him, a natural smile coming to my face. Which, of course, my dad returned in kind.
“Who’s Sunny? I thought his kid’s name was Hudson?” Tessa questioned.
“Nickname, darling,” Mom responded, her hand landing on top of Tessa’s in a motherly way. “See? You should come home more often. You’d know what we were talking about. At least more than you learn on social media.”
Tessa nodded but said nothing.
I swallowed past my discomfort. There was nothing wrong with my sister. She just knew who she was, and it infuriated me, because I didn’t.
“My friends and I are going dancing tomorrow at The Raven. You should come. It’ll be fun.”
Tessa stared at me. The uncertainty in her eyes made me wonder if she felt similarly about me. Probably not, but it made me less anxious to tell myself it was true.
“I’ll think about it.”
“Perfect.”
The next hour went by quickly as we took turns talking about life and what was going on lately. I had a slice of homemade banana bread from Mom, and Dad told us about some new space stuff NASA had put out a paper on recently. It was good. Peaceful.
But the cowboy stayed in the back of my mind long into the night. A cowboy that shouldn’t be within my mind at all.