Chapter 18
Rowen
I barely made it through the door before I felt him behind me.
Wolfe slammed it shut, and then he was there—all of him. Heat and muscle and fire, pressing me back against the wall like he couldn’t stand another breath of distance.
His mouth collided with mine.
I didn’t pretend to be startled. I’d been waiting for this. Starving for it.
My back hit the wall, and he kissed me like it was punishment and promise all in one. His tongue slid against mine, his teeth grazed my lower lip, and my entire body arched up, begging for more.
He groaned—deep, broken—and lifted me again. My legs wrapped around him like they’d done it a thousand times before.
“Fuck, Rowen,” he rasped, his forehead pressed to mine. “You drive me insane.”
I laughed—sharp, breathless. “Good.”
He growled and carried me through the house. We didn’t make it to the bed. The wall in the hallway caught us first.
Wolfe tore at my top, his fingers desperate, trembling at the edges. His mouth was at my neck, biting—not to mark, not yet—but like he needed to feel me bruise under him. I moaned, head falling back, hands in his hair, pulling him closer, always closer.
My top was gone before I could blink. His mouth replaced it, teeth scraping across the swell of my breast before he bit down, just enough to make me gasp and claw at his back.
“Take it off,” I hissed, dragging my nails down his spine.
He did. Shirt first, over his head in one hard motion. Then he pressed me against the wall and looked at me like I was the war he was about to lose—and win anyway.
His pants dropped next. Mine followed, quick and messy, as our hands fumbled and grabbed and refused to let go.
“Open,” he growled, dropping to his knees. I didn’t get the chance to comply; his hands spread my legs, his shoulders kept them spread, his head dipped, and then he was tasting me.
I wasn’t sure which one of us moaned the loudest. My legs were over his shoulders, one of his hands pressing low on my tummy, as he pinned me against the wall.
His breath was heavy against my inner thigh, and then the heat returned between my legs.
All sensation, all at once, rushed to my clit, and my back tried to arch, tried to push off against the wall, but he held me in place with his shoulders and one hand.
I felt his lips brush briefly over my clit, and my head banged against the wall at the shock of how delicious it felt. My breath was coming in pants as pleasure tensed around my muscles, over my thighs, spreading up and over.
I reached above me, desperate to hold onto something, and my fingers found purchase on fuck knows what above me. A ledge? A stone? It didn’t matter; I gripped it as my hips tried to rock. My other hand was buried in his hair as Wolfe’s tongue lapped greedily between my legs.
Wolfe pressed me harder into the wall, and his other arm wrapped around my thigh, giving him a level of access that was simply indescribable.
Wolfe licked and sucked, and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold on.
His tongue traced over my clit and then dipped lower, pressing, dividing, tasting everything.
His mouth was a gift as it lapped between my folds, pushing inside with an almost insatiable hunger.
“Fuck—” My voice was ragged, my pulse wild. “Wolfe—” I yelled out as he tilted my hips, pulling his mouth back, and before I could protest that he’d pulled away, I felt the tip of his fingers part me, felt the heat of his breath against my most intimate place, and then one finger pushed inside me.
“Fuck, princess,” Wolfe murmured, his breathing ragged.
“Let me look at you,” he said almost quietly, as if to himself.
“You taste like fucking heaven,” he groaned, his mouth dipping back in to taste me.
His tongue, sudden and direct, flicked over my clit, and I couldn’t bite back from groaning his name.
“Wolfe!”
He ignored me and continued to flick over my clit as a second finger sank deep inside me, pushing in and out, and each time, the hot edge of his tongue flicked against my clit.
I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. My entire awareness was on that small bundle of nerves that he mercilessly teased, my orgasm building and building, and I knew I was going to come undone.
“Fuck, Wolfe, that’s good, that’s so good,” I panted. He hummed his approval against me, and I gripped his hair tighter.
“You’re so fucking wet for me, princess,” Wolfe growled, and I felt a finger move from where I was aching for him, lower, down further still, and my body tensed as I realized his intent.
“Wolfe…”
“Mm-hmm?” The tip of his finger moved lightly over my other hole, gently circling, rubbing, pressing slightly but never too much.
His tongue began to dance over my clit again, and I had nowhere to hide as he fucked me with his tongue.
I was sensitive like I’d never been before, my body strung tighter than it’d ever been.
“Wolfe…” I was begging and he knew it. I felt him smile against my clit before he started sucking, flicking, and his mouth was moving over my clit back and forth, and then I was screaming his name as my orgasm crashed into me with such a force that I wasn’t sure I could take it.
My body jerked, but Wolfe kept his mouth on me, even as my shoulders dug into the wall behind me and my whole body felt like it was arching. His grip on my thighs tightened, and he let me ride his face as I begged him never to stop.
I couldn’t seem to catch my breath; my body felt worn out, my breathing coming in short gasps, and then Wolfe was there. Holding me up still, his cock hard, heavy, hot against my thigh.
His eyes met mine—silver fire.
“This isn’t just us fucking,” he said, voice low and brutal. “You know that, right?”
“I know,” I whispered, my voice ragged from my screaming, and Wolfe’s eyes flared with desire just as he pushed inside. My breath caught once more. My nails dug into his shoulders.
Wolfe groaned like the world cracked open beneath us. He held still, forehead to mine, panting hard. “Princess, you feel—fuck.”
I couldn’t speak. Couldn’t think. Only feel.
And then he moved.
Each thrust was deep, slow, devastating. There was nothing careful about the way he took me—only truth. Each snap of his hips said what neither of us had: You are mine. You have always been mine.
The bond flared—bright, hot, unfinished. Not sealed. But there.
Alive.
I clung to him as it built between us, until my body locked tight and the wave of pleasure hit like wildfire. I cried out his name, not caring who heard, not caring what it meant.
He followed with a growl, burying himself deep and breaking apart inside me. For a long, breathless moment, there was only us.
No pack.
No war.
Wolfe kissed me gently. “More,” he growled.
He carried me to the bedroom, laying me down, never leaving me, and I could feel him harden inside me again.
“Wolfe…”
“I’m spending all night inside you, princess,” he murmured against my lips, his hips rolling gently. “All fucking night.”
Morning light slipped through the curtains, soft and golden. Warm enough to feel like peace.
My legs were tangled with Wolfe’s, the sheet half-kicked off, our clothes ripped and torn in the hallway. His arm was heavy across my waist, his hand resting low on my stomach—like even in sleep, he couldn’t let go.
I didn’t move.
Didn’t want to wake him.
Didn’t want to admit I didn’t know what the hell to do with this.
His breath ghosted against the back of my neck, slow and steady. Calm. Like the man who’d torn me apart last night hadn’t buried all his frustration, rage and need inside me with every kiss, every thrust, every growl of my name.
I’d wanted it. Gods, I’d needed it. But now? Now my body was sore in the best way, and the bond that hadn’t sealed was a low, burning hum beneath my skin.
Waiting.
Like it knew we were dancing on the edge of something irreversible.
I exhaled slowly, my chest tight. My throat still raw from the sounds he’d dragged from me. I hated that I could still feel his hands on me—his mouth, his voice. Like they’d left bruises deeper than skin.
And worse? I didn’t want them gone.
I moved slightly. Not enough to break contact. Just enough to breathe. Wolfe murmured something behind me, a low rumble I didn’t catch, and tightened his grip.
Shit.
I was so tired of pretending this was just for the pack’s survival. Just what the pack needed. Because last night? That wasn’t politics.
That was him.
And me.
And everything we’d spent weeks pretending we didn’t need.
I closed my eyes.
I should’ve left before dawn. Slipped out while he was still sleeping.
Put the walls back up before he woke and looked at me like I mattered.
But I didn’t move. Because for the first time in years, my body was quiet.
My wolf wasn’t snarling, and I had to admit that I simply didn’t want to be anywhere else.
Even if that scared the hell out of me.
“You keep rubbing your ass against me, I’ll wake up properly,” he murmured, his lips skimming over the nape of my neck.
“Go to sleep,” I told him, not fighting the smile. His arm tightened, pulling me back into his body. “Aren’t you done?”
“Fuck no,” Wolfe said with a low chuckle.
I didn’t speak. Neither did he. For a moment, it was enough just to exist like this. Still. Tangled. Not pretending we didn’t know what we were to each other.
His voice broke the silence, low and rough. “You okay?”
I swallowed. “I am.” A beat passed. “You?”
“I feel good.” His thumb rubbed softly across my skin.
“I thought about getting up,” I admitted.
His lips pressed into my shoulder. “Why didn’t you?”
I turned to face him. His hair was a mess, one cheek creased from the pillow, but his eyes were sharp—clearer than I’d seen them.
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “Maybe I wanted to see what would happen.”
He nodded once, like he understood more than I said. Like he felt it too. His hand moved, thumb brushing across my waist. Slow. Thoughtful.
“Doesn’t mean this fixes everything,” I said.
“No,” he agreed. “But it means something.”
I looked at him. “Even if the bond didn’t seal?”
He didn’t flinch. “When you are in heat and I fill you, the bond will seal,” he said quietly. “Last night was more about the choice.”
That made my breath catch because for so long, it hadn’t felt like a choice. The bond. The roles. The pressure. Everything had felt prewritten. But this? Lying here with him in the quiet, no Council, no rogues, no rituals? This was ours.
Our moment.
Our choice.
“What happens now?” I asked.
Wolfe propped himself up on one elbow, gaze steady. “Business?” He didn’t look pissed off at mentioning it. “Corrin’s on my radar,” he said. “Murrow, too. I’m not ignoring that Lewis was close to all of them.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to.” While it scared me that the betrayal may run that deep, I was ready to listen.
He hesitated. “I’ll need you beside me when I confront them.”
I rose, mirroring his position, my hair tangled and wild falling over my shoulder. “I will be.”
“It’s more than just pack politics,” he continued. “Shifters like Henry—”
“Henry?” I asked, sitting up, staring at him. “Henry is too young.”
Wolfe rolled over onto his back, his hands behind his head as he looked up at me.
“No, he isn’t. He’ll be an adult before you know it.
I can use that rage and anger he’s harboring and put it to good use.
To defend his pack. He and the others like him don’t see Stonefang or Blueridge; they see their pack. One pack. Our pack.”
I frowned, but I didn’t argue. The Goddess gifted the females of the species with a heat we had to endure for the rest of our lives.
She didn’t let the males off. Before they reached adulthood, they carried a deep anger and rage within them.
It was believed that, like our heat, a fire burned inside the young males that they needed to learn to control.
For the males, it helped teach them discipline; many chose to enlist in the human armed forces to be able, quite literally, to fight it out.
It was rare in the Hollow for the younger shifters to leave us, but it wasn’t unheard of.
“There are more than Henry who believe in this pack,” I said softly, my hand running through his hair, and I half froze at my unconscious display of intimacy.
Wolfe caught my hand as I drew it back, kissing my fingertips. “I know, but to find the ones who don’t and who plot to harm us, you, then I need to…”
I watched him carefully. “You’re going to use your Will.”
“I have to,” he said, looking away unhappily. “I have no choice.”
“You went to the ridge to ask the Goddess if this was her choice,” I said with understanding. “And…she sent you Diesel?” I felt my lips twitch.
Wolfe groaned, his arm draping over his eyes. “She sent me Diesel,” he said. “And a fucking landslide. I don’t know if she’s wishing me luck or hoping I fail.”
He looked both pissed off and amazed, and overall mystified. I hadn’t seen him stumped before, and before I could stop it, a giggle escaped.
Wolfe lifted his arm, looking at me in mock outrage. “You think it’s funny?”
I laughed out loud until I was laughing so hard I had tears streaming down my cheeks. Wolfe was also laughing, and when we eventually calmed down, we lay side by side as we got our breath back.
Wolfe played with the ends of my hair as I stared at the ceiling. “What are you thinking?”
“I wasn’t in heat,” I told him. “The bond isn’t sealed. Last night was just…a good time.”
I heard the low rumble in his chest. “A good time? Good? Huh…I’ll try harder next time.”
Oh… I sat up, my body wanting him to try now, not that he needed to try. Last night was amazing. Shit, I had to get control of myself.
Wolfe tugged my hair gently until I looked back at him. He smoothed his hand over my exposed shoulder. “Last night matters,” he said. “More than a good time, you agree?”
I did. I nodded because it had felt so right. How could it be wrong?
He pulled me back down beside him, and I went, lying over his chest as I held his gaze. “You’re mine, Rowen. Pack or no pack.”
I raised an eyebrow teasingly. “That so?”
“You complaining?” he asked, and I shook my head no. “That’s all I needed to know.”
I smiled, just a little, and lay my head on his chest. His arms wrapped around me like they’d always been meant to, and for a while, we stayed like that—quiet, close, not trying to solve everything.
“Shouldn’t we get up?” I asked him even as my eyes closed.
“Not yet, we can have this, we have time.”
Because for once, surviving wasn’t the only thing that mattered. We had time…and Goddess help anyone who tried to take it from us.