Chapter 29
Gabrielle's POV
My ass is still pressed up against Lincoln's erection. My heart is swimming, but the pleasure I feel is tantamount to paradise.
Sarah stands and reaches over to my right to take out something from the drawer on the side of the couch, and it's a big fuchsia-colored dildo.
"While you're nice and sensitive," Sarah says, smiling at me, sticking the dildo slowly in.
Sarah then crawls on her knees onto the sofa to my right while she uses her right hand to fuck me a little faster with it.
The entire time, Lincoln's cock is moving against my ass, hard as can be, his whispers of, "Oh God," painting the inner sanctum of my ears with his pleasure.
He's getting off on watching Sarah do this. My heart wants to be jealous. My heart wants to remind me that we're here in her house or apartment or wherever… and he's enjoying this because Sarah is a part of it.
Was it his idea to come here? How did we even get here? We ordered a ride because we knew we would be drinking, so we must have ordered a ride back, or maybe Sarah did. Either way, that toy that she's using inside of me feels good, especially feeling Lincoln's dick on my ass.
"Oh God. Oh my God," he whispers again, super turned on.
Looking to the right, I notice that Sarah's top is off. Then I notice that Sarah has been looking at Lincoln the whole time while she's fucking me with the dildo.
Sarah gives him a smile that makes me angry, but my hazy tiredness is forbidding my fury to get higher than 2%.
Sarah takes Lincoln's right hand, turns it palm up, and positions it between her legs as she remains kneeling on the couch to my right, pressed up against Lincoln while she fucks me with a dildo, leaning over both of us.
There's a sopping wet sound as Lincoln puts a finger inside of her, then two, his middle and ring finger.
With every insertion of his fingers inside of Sarah, his cock bucks harder against me.
Lincoln looks at me, kissing the side of my face, kissing my neck, but then his head travels to the right to look at Sarah as he continues fucking her with his fingers, something that in the back of my mind I'm aware they've probably done a hundred times with each other.
Suddenly, it feels like I'm no longer here. Like I'm a third wheel. Like Sarah is only fucking me with a dildo to keep me distracted.
Taking the dildo out of me, she starts sucking the wetness off of it, deep-throating it right in front of Lincoln.
Lincoln is captivated by her, reaching up with both hands now to massage my breasts. Sarah takes his right hand that he had inside of her only moments ago and pushes it towards his face, making him suck her juice off his two fingers he had inside her.
Then she takes his hand, giggling in that seductive way women do, and places it back inside of her, his thumb also playing with her clitoris.
Sarah looks at me and starts kissing me. I want to protest.
To push her away, but part of me doesn't want to lose control to her.
Lincoln is aroused by this, clearly, and I'm going to look like the idiot who's not playing along.
She's put me in a position to not look as fun as her if I get up right now and decide to leave, even though I have no idea how the fuck I got here, and so I move my ass, wriggling it slowly on Lincoln's erection.
It actually hurts a little bit because of how hard he is. His left hand wraps around me tighter, no longer playing with my breasts but trailing down to where Sarah fucks me with the dildo.
It's not as thick as Lincoln's dick, but it's long and does those taps on my cervix that makes me feel like I'm going to come. Suddenly, the desire is all I see and the bright light behind my eyes the minute Lincoln's middle finger on his left hand starts playing with my wet clitoris.
"Ugh," I gasp, but soon as he touches me.
Sarah kisses him, their tongues gliding over each other's.
The sound of her wet vagina as he fucks her with his right hand while starting to stick his middle finger on his left inside of me alongside the dildo threatens to send him over the edge.
I can tell by the way he's breathing faster and now the way he's bucking under me and how much harder his cock feels through his pants, that he's ready to go over.
Sarah starts breathing harder as well. Then she's crying out in pleasure right against his lips as he continues to kiss her, as her mouth hangs open slack before resuming the kiss as she climaxes.
Turning my head to look, I notice Lincoln's hands slightly dripping, very slick with her juice, him moaning in her mouth, his eyes closed, and hers closed like they're the only two people in the world.
His finger is still sliding inside of me, and Sarah presses the dildo hard up against my cervix, then holds it there, pulsing it right at the edge.
Even though my jealousy is yawning awake, seeing and feeling my ex-husband so turned on sends me over the edge, and I come too.
My legs clench, my whole body contorts as I double over, threatening to just fall forward off of Lincoln and off of this couch, but Lincoln quickly removes his middle finger to grasp on to me with his right arm, seat-belting me back onto him as he maintains his kiss with Sarah.
My eyes close momentarily, only to feel lips on me again, and at first I'm grateful that they're Lincoln's until I realize that they're Sarah's. My tongue moves of its own accord, doing the dance with Sarah's.
My ass continues to wriggle against Lincoln, causing him to moan faster.
"I'm…" He starts to say as his breathing picks up the pace, and I know he's about to go over, to come in his pants, as the movements of my ass start to draw his pleasure out of him.
This is too much for him.
"Oh my God," he moans quicker.
"That's right, baby. You go ahead and come," Sarah's voice is a wilting breeze in the background.
My eyes wide open, not having realized I closed them, only to wake up to utter confusion. It's very quiet, and daylight is seeping through the curtains of the apartment.
What the hell?
Did I black out?
I'm on my right side, curled up on the arm of the couch, and when I sit up yawning, I look to my right and see Lincoln curled up on his right side, propped up by his right elbow. All his clothes are on.
That's good, right?
That means that he probably didn't have sex with Sarah. That's something that I was worried about. Looking closer at him, I notice that his eyes are open, his head perched on his palm.
"Morning," he smiles tiredly at me.
With a yawn, I sit up even straighter. "Where… where is Sarah?" I ask, my mind clearing now.
"She's still sleeping," he replies.
The entire session of our special activities comes careening to the forefront of my sober mind. I stand up, trying to find my leggings and panties since I just now noticed that I'm bottomless, and either Sarah or he had put a blanket around me.
Now that I'm completely awake and my mind has come back, I'm furious.
"You okay?" he asks, still sitting there tiredly like he doesn't have a fucking clue.
"Fantastic," I reply, putting on my leggings after I find them.
"What's wrong?"
"Did you have fun last night?" I ask with venom in my tone as I put one foot in and then the other, falling back on the couch after losing my balance slightly.
"I mean, it was torture," he says with a slight reluctant smirk, as if testing the waters. "I still didn't get to come, by the way," he says, as if that makes this all okay.
I mean, part of it does make me feel good, and I don't know why, but this whole thing with him and Sarah and me being in the middle of it just makes me feel horrible.
"Did you do anything else with Sarah?" I ask, wondering if when I went to sleep, the both of them fucked each other.
Why is he not answering?
I stand now, folding my arms, just looking at him, waiting for an answer.
"Wait, what?" he asks, looking shocked.
"Are you for real right now?" My voice comes out in a tremor.
"I'm sorry, baby. I didn't hear you."
"You didn't hear me? So you don't listen to me when I'm speaking to you?"
"Baby, I'm half asleep. I'm sorry. Please tell me again."
"Did you do anything else with Sarah?"
"Past what we all did last night? No," he says with confidence, and I don't even know why I even bother trying to trust him because he had lied in the past.
That's why we're in the situation right now.
"I'm calling a ride," I say as I head for Sarah's apartment door.
"Okay." He gets up, following tiredly behind me. "Wait up, let me get my shoes."
Like hell I'm waiting. Opening the door, I walk out through the hallway, then angry gallop down the stairs.
What a wonderful bright New Year's January day. Fucking shit. Fucking Lincoln.
After a while, I hear his voice in the distance, calling out to me as I continue to walk down the block. I can't walk too far. The driver had mentioned he’d be in a bright red car.
"Baby, hold up," Lincoln says, catching up to me. "You were going to leave me."
"Why not? You're right at home there anyway," I seethe.
"Baby, Sarah and I didn't do anything else. I swear to you. I know you have no reason to believe me, but I didn't do anything with her."
"Oh my fucking God, you're missing the whole entire fucking point, Lincoln," I say, whirling on him. "Why the hell were we even there in the first place?"
"You don't remember?"
"I was drunk!!"
"So was I," he says defensively.
"And I'm guessing Sarah wasn't?"
"I mean, maybe not as drunk as we were."
"And you don't find that the least bit convenient while you were basically fucking her in front of me?" My words come out like fire, feeling my heart breaking so in my feelings it's making me feel insecure, and I don't like feeling weak.
"Baby, we all took part… First of all… Hold on, are you really legitimately mad? I thought you were into it. You guys started making out at the club, and I was—"
"You didn't find that weird?"
"I mean, it was a little shocking, but… it seemed like something that you wanted, so I went along with it. What was I going to tell you? No, you're not allowed to do that?"
"Why the fuck would I want to make out with Sarah? I don't like girls, Lincoln."
Lincoln smirks, which makes me want to slap him. Jerking his head slightly to the left before looking into the sky, he smiles down at me, looking at me, and says, "Well, clearly part of you does, because you got more action last night than I did."
"And I suppose you got nothing out of it whatsoever while your fingers were deep inside of her pussy, right?" I roll my eyes, walking away from him, back down the way I came.
"Baby. Baby, wait."
"Don't fucking call me ‘baby’."
"You seemed like you were enjoying it. I'm sorry, baby. I didn't come, though. I kept my word to you."
"Ha! As long as you kept your fucking word and you didn't come while your fingers were buried DEEP in that bitch's pussy and while you were making out with her last night more than you were with me!
God, I fucking hate how clueless you are.
You have no concept of what it feels like to be hurt and betrayed by someone. "
"How exactly did I betray you?" Lincoln's voice raises, becoming more defensive.
"You and I are not together, a fact that you constantly shove in my face and let me know!
You claim we're not ever getting back together, you claim that you no longer belong to me and that I can do whatever I want, but then you're giving me mixed signals when you get mad at me for not being exclusive with you when this—"
"—I'm not saying that we have to necessarily be exclusive, but I don't want to be fucking around with you doing friends with benefits and shit while you're also doing it with other people, which is something I told you I wasn't down with!" I say.
"I thought your main thing was that I don't come, which is something that I adhere to for you because this whole thing that we're doing is fun for us."
"You asshole! That's why you think we're doing this?!"
"Well, then why else are we doing this because you're confusing the fuck out of me, Gabby.
As far as I'm concerned, I didn't do anything wrong.
Yes, that's the woman I cheated on you with, and I'm so sorry, and no matter how many times I say I'm sorry, that's not going to change that fact, but we're no longer together, something that you keep on claiming, and you were getting fucked by her. "
"I DIDN’T… OH MY GOD! I didn’t ask for that!" I shriek.
"Yeah, well, you got it. I didn’t fuck Sarah. I haven’t in a while."
"What the hell does that even mean?"
"Since we agreed to hold off from me coming, I haven't fucked her."
"And what is the reason we were even doing that whole thing, Lincoln? Or do you have short-term memory? Why am I even asking? You're going to forget the next second."
"What are you… can you stop fighting with me and just tell me what—"
"Why do I bother? You're going to forget anyway," I mutter in fury.
"Baby, please."
"I don't want to talk to you," I cut him off.
My heart is shattered into a thousand jagged pieces, each one slicing deeper with every beat, because despite everything, despite the betrayal, the lies, the wreckage he left, I still love Lincoln with a ferocity that terrifies me.
I don't want him involved at all with Sarah, not a whisper, not a glance, nothing.
And the fact that he never even made an attempt to remove himself from the situation last night makes me feel as though he still wants her, or that's what he really wants, her…
Always her; lurking in the shadows of us like a ghost I can't exorcise.
Then again, he's a guy, so they're going to naturally go after whatever's hanging in front of their face, but it just shows me that it's a pipe dream, the hope that he'll have self-control.
Maybe in my little fanfiction mind, I believed that if he stood on his two feet and denied Sarah and distanced himself away from her and prioritized me and how he felt about me, that maybe I could make myself feel better and think that in some other parallel universe, my ex-husband would have the capability of living happily ever after with me.
We want what we want, and sometimes wanting is not enough.
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