Chapter Five Zoey
Ilifted the shade over the plane window, looking out at the endless blue waves below. The pilot just announced that Sirona Isle was visible from the left side of the plane, and I could see it in the distance.
I’d looked at pictures online when I heard where Ryan’s wedding would be taking place, but nothing on a computer screen could compare to the beauty of the place in real life.
A cloudless sky stretched over a constantly moving ocean in shades of blue ranging from navy to turquoise.
White sand circled the edge of the teardrop-shaped island on all sides, and the land itself was largely covered by a rainforest. There was also an extinct volcano on the southern tip of the island.
“Whoa. That’s so beautiful. I can’t believe that your dad is paying for all of us to spend a whole week here,” Angela, one of the bridesmaids, said from the seat beside me.
It was Monday afternoon, and I was flying to the island with most of the wedding party. The bride and groom had taken an earlier flight with some of the family members that would be joining us for the week, including Jake. Ford also flew down with them, and I was glad.
It had been a week since Ford broke up with me, and I was a mess. I missed him all the way down to my soul, and I’d soaked my pillow with tears more than once.
But the worst part of it all was that I still had to work with him. There was no avoiding it. The ER was a busy place, and we all had to take patients as they came. I couldn’t choose which patients I saw or which doctors I was alongside.
So, I quickly became good at keeping my face blank and not looking directly at him. When we spoke, I focused on a spot just beyond his left ear and never talked about anything other than the job.
It was easy, because Ford didn’t try to talk to me about anything personal either. We both seemed to agree that it was better to just stay as professional as possible and get through our shifts at the hospital.
I hoped more than ever that Ford would get the promotion he wanted so badly. Then, he’d be in a cushy office two floors above the ER, and I’d rarely have to see him at all.
Until the baby was born.
My hand started to move toward my stomach, but I stopped myself at the last second. No one but Ruby knew about the pregnancy, and I wanted it to stay that way for now. This week was about celebrating Ryan and Leanne, and I didn’t want to take away from that by revealing my pregnancy.
Besides, despite everything, I knew that Ford should be the first to know, and I just wasn’t ready to tell him.
I would, eventually. When the idea of talking to him didn’t hurt so much. When I thought I could handle discussing how we were going to co-parent without breaking down in tears.
I just needed some time.
It was too bad that Ford was in the wedding party because a week away from him would have been much better for healing my broken heart. Instead, I was going to have to act like everything was fine so that my brothers didn’t find out about us.
“Zoey? You okay?”
I blinked and looked at Angela again. “Sorry, I spaced out for a second. I guess I really need this vacation.”
Angela laughed. She was a friend of the bride, and I didn’t know her well, but she’d been open and friendly for the entire four-hour flight.
“I hear that,” she said, glancing out the window again.
“I need some sunshine and saltwater to get to my happy place. My sister is like that too. Heather was just going to come on Saturday for the wedding, but Leanne said she’s more than welcome to join us on the island a few days early. So, she’ll be here tomorrow.”
“You’re twins, right? Identical or fraternal?”
“Identical, but people can always tell us apart because Heather dyes her hair funky colors while I just keep mine brown. Right now, she’s got streaks of pink.”
“Are you talking about Heather?” Jess, the maid of honor asked as she turned around in her seat in front of us. She was sitting with her husband Cody, but he had headphones on, so he didn’t join our conversation. “Did she decide which university she’ll be attending in January?”
Angela shook her head. “Not yet. She’s been accepted to three different colleges, and they are all in different states, so it’s a big decision to make.”
“Your sister’s going to college?” I asked curiously.
“She’s already an engineer, but she’s going back for her doctorate.”
“Impressive.”
“Yeah, those colleges think so too. Unfortunately, none of them are in Chicago.”
Angela’s tone was light, but there was a flash of sadness in her eyes.
I couldn’t imagine how she felt at the idea of her twin sister moving away.
My brothers had always been in my life, and I had a pretty good relationship with them, especially Ryan.
As the oldest child, he looked out for me as much as he could when we were growing up, even though he was only five years older than me.
He really didn’t have much of a choice since our mom abandoned us when I was just a toddler and our dad never found it within himself to prioritize his children over his job, no matter how much we needed him.
As the plane touched down, I firmly shoved all of my own heartbreak and drama to the back of my mind. Ryan deserved to have a great week, and if he noticed I was unhappy, it would get in the way of that.
So, I was going to put a smile on my face and enjoy myself, one way or another.
At least, I didn’t have to worry about my room being next to Ford’s, as we originally planned. Angela was right about my dad paying for everything this week. It was his way of pretending that he cared about his kids. He’d throw money at us, as if that was more important than showing up.
But this time, it worked in my favor because I called my father a couple of days after Ford dumped me and asked if he would mind upgrading my accommodations for the week. He agreed without question, in a hurry to end the call because he was at work and couldn’t be bothered with my problems.
That was how I ended up with a beachfront bungalow instead of a regular room at the resort where the wedding party and family members were staying. I’d just gotten my key from the front desk clerk when I heard my name being called across the lobby.
“Zoey!”
Turning, I found Ryan striding toward me, his dark hair windswept and a bright smile on his face. I hadn’t seen him in a couple of weeks, so I wasn’t surprised when he hurried forward and wrapped me up in a hug, even lifting me off my feet for a few seconds.
He set me down and glanced around the lobby, where everyone that flew in with us was milling around. “It looks like everyone made it.”
Neither of us mentioned our dad. Despite the fact that aunts and uncles and cousins from our family were here to spend the week with us leading up to the wedding, he wasn’t coming until Saturday for the wedding ceremony.
He was even going to miss the rehearsal dinner the night before, telling Ryan that business doesn’t stop just because someone is getting married.
Nevermind that it was his own child getting married, and he had more than enough executives to run the company for a few days if he really wanted to be here.
Ryan and I had accepted a long time ago that our dad wasn’t capable of being the kind of father we wanted him to be.
He cared about making money more than he cared about us, even though he was already an obscenely wealthy man.
Jake still struggled to accept that at times. No matter how much our dad let us down, I knew there was a part of Jake that clung to the hope that someday, he would show us that we did matter.
It made me sad for him.
“Why does your key look different from everyone else’s?” Ryan asked.
I grinned and shrugged. “I upgraded to a bungalow. I figured it was okay to treat myself since I haven’t been on a vacation in years.”
And I didn’t want to even breathe the same air as Ford. When we planned to have rooms next to each other, the idea was that it would be easy to sneak into each other’s beds without anyone else having a clue.
That obviously wasn’t going to happen, and I was better off alone in my bungalow.
“Leanne and I are treating ourselves to one of the overwater villas, but not until Saturday night. We want the wedding night to be special.”
I wrinkled my nose and held up my hand to stop him from speaking. “Enough about that. I don’t need to think about how my brother is planning to celebrate his marriage in his fancy villa.”
Ryan laughed. Another groomsman, Damien, approached Ryan, and I slipped out of the resort while they chatted. I wanted to get to my bungalow and rest a little before the bonfire tonight.
But I’d only made it a few steps outside of the resort when another voice called out my name. This one was much less welcome.
“Zoey, wait,” Ford said, and the rush of pain I felt just hearing my name on his lips locked up my muscles and stole my breath. He came from behind me, apparently having followed me from the lobby, even though I didn’t see him there.
I tightened my grip on the handle of my rolling suitcase and narrowed my eyes at him. “What can I do for you, Dr. Whitmore?”
Ford flinched at my use of the formal title, and it might have been satisfying if the sight of him didn’t hurt so much.
“I want to talk to you.”
He’d caught me off-guard, and I was looking at him for the first time in a week.
I was startled to see that he looked like hell.
There were dark circles under his eyes, like he hadn’t been sleeping well, and he was pale.
He didn’t hold himself with his usual confidence, his shoulders slumped as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
Infuriatingly, my first instinct was to pull him into my arms and comfort him. Seeing him look beaten down like this touched a part of my heart that still belonged to him, even though it was broken.
“Where are you going?” he asked when I said nothing to his declaration that he wanted to talk.
“I’m headed to my bungalow,” I said as I stepped around him and continued down the sidewalk that led to the beach.
For a moment, I thought he would take a hint and leave me alone, but then, he was right beside me, matching my quick pace. I kept my eyes focused ahead, falling back on my plan not to even look directly at him, but I could feel his gaze burning into the side of my face.
“You rented a bungalow?” There was something close to accusation in his voice, and I ground my teeth together as my anger spiked. “You’re staying away from everybody?”
“I’m attempting to stay away from you,” I snapped. Surely, he’d agree that it was a bad idea to stay in rooms right next to each other.
Frankly, I didn’t understand why he was talking to me at all.
“I deserve that,” he muttered in a small voice. “But Zoey, that’s what I need to talk to you about. Can we speak in private?”
I laughed, but there was no warmth in it. “I’m afraid not. I’m tired of being treated like your dirty little secret. That time has passed.”
He placed a hand on my arm, pulling me to a stop and moving to stand in front of me again. There were other people on the sidewalk, and they had to shuffle around us.
He was almost making a scene.
“You’re not a dirty little secret. I never should’ve…” He closed his eyes and let out a long breath. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say it was deep regret that I was seeing on his face. “I don’t want to keep hiding our relationship.”
My jaw dropped as his audacity hit me.
“Relationship?” I repeated, my voice shrill. “We don’t have a relationship anymore. You made sure of that a week ago.”
Yanking my arm out of his grip, I started to walk again, more eager than ever to put distance between us.
Relationship. He had to be out of his damn mind.
Then, he proved me right by falling into step beside me again. “I made a mistake, angel. I swear, I was trying to do the right thing, to make the best decision for both of us. But I’m weak, and I can’t stand this. I miss you so damn much.”
The best decision for both of us? I didn’t know what the hell that was supposed to mean, but it just pissed me off even more.
“Leave me alone, Ford. You’re good at that.”
“I can’t. I already tried that, and it’s been the worst week of my fucking life. I can’t walk away from you, Zo. You’re too important to me.”
I scoffed. “Not as important as your potential promotion.”
We’d reached the bungalow, and I stepped up to the door. It was a cute little building with what looked like bamboo panels on the outside and a deck along the back, facing the beach. There were palm trees between it and the dwellings on either side.
Just as I unlocked the door, Ford reached for me again, but I jerked away before he could touch me. Didn’t he understand that his touch hurt, no matter how gentle it was?
The movement made my purse slip off my shoulder and fall to the ground. It wasn’t zipped up all the way, so the contents spilled out onto the concrete pad in front of the door.
“Damn it,” I muttered, bending down to shove everything back into my bag.
Ford did the same, and I wanted to yell at him now, to tell him that I didn’t need anything from him, but before I could say a word, his hand closed around a white pill bottle.
My breath caught as he looked down at the prenatal vitamins in his hand.
Then, his eyes met mine, widened with shock and something darker, more desperate. It scared me with its intensity.
“Zoey… is there something you want to tell me?”