Chapter Eight Ford
Leanne and Ryan planned things for us to do every day. But Leanne was thoughtful and realized that Wednesday might be a good day to take it easy. So, the only thing planned for today was an afternoon at the beach.
I was eager to get there and see Zoey.
I wasn’t sure, but I thought that I might’ve made some progress at dinner last night. We talked a little and even though she refused to let me walk her back to her bungalow, we parted ways without any anger or pain between us.
Progress.
I pulled on my swim trunks and picked up my phone. Just before I could tuck it into my pocket, it went off with a text message. I opened it, my mouth turning down as I saw that it was from Delilah. She’d been reaching out to me more lately, especially after that dinner with the board members.
That damn dinner.
I never should’ve gone. It was just another mark against me.
I didn’t think much of it when Delilah handed her phone to a waiter and asked him to take a picture of the group.
My mind was occupied with my conflict over my relationship with Zoey all evening, and I wasn’t my usual social self.
I barely managed to force a smile just as the picture was taken, and I never thought about it again until Zoey mentioned it.
Delilah’s texts since that dinner had been mostly about how good it was to spend time with me—as if we were on a date that night instead of her just tagging along with her dad to a dinner that was supposed to be good for my career—and offering to help me prepare for my interview with the hospital board, which would be taking place next week, the day after I returned to Chicago.
I’d been politely distant with her, still trying to walk the fine line between being honest about my lack of feelings for her and staying on her good side so that her dad would be more likely to vote my way.
It was exhausting.
I read her text just before leaving my room.
I’d love to see the island. Maybe you can show me on a video call today?
I had no idea why she would think I’d want to do that. We hadn’t even talked on the phone in years, and we’d never done a video call. It seemed that the more time passed, the bolder Delilah got. I never encouraged it, and I hoped she’d eventually take a hint.
But a small voice whispered in the back of my mind that it was my fault for not being direct with her about it.
I didn’t respond to the message. Instead, I put the phone away and shoved Delilah to the back of my mind. She was the least of my concerns this week.
When I reached the beach, most of the wedding party was already there. The only people missing were Kelsie and Leanne. According to Damien, there was some kind of wedding veil emergency that needed to be handled, although I couldn’t imagine they’d find a replacement here on the island.
Angela and Jess were lying on towels in the sand, working on their tans, while Leanne’s mom and aunt sat in lounge chairs under a huge umbrella, reading in the shade.
Cody, Ryan, and his cousin Gordon were in the water already, and most importantly, Zoey was walking along the shore.
She held her flip-flops in her hand and looked down as the water lapped over her feet.
Her brown hair fell in the loose waves halfway down her back, blown around by the breeze coming off the water.
Her bikini was black and barely covered her. Strings tied at the hips, back, and neck held the thing against her body, and all I could think about was untying each of them with my teeth.
Zoey was beautiful, with dangerous curves and a smile that usually reached her brown eyes.
Even the burn scar on her forearm was beautiful because it showed how strong she was.
I craved her touch, her taste. My eyes locked onto her legs, and I wanted them wrapped around me while I pinned her to a wall.
Suddenly, my view of her was blocked as Jake stepped in front of me.
“Good, you’re here. I need a wingman.”
“No way,” I said without even thinking about it.
“Don’t say that until you see the girls. It’s a blonde and brunette, both smoking hot.”
I glanced over his shoulder to see that Zoey was still walking along the beach, but I didn’t let my gaze linger too long. I knew that she wouldn’t want Jake to figure out there was a connection between us.
But still, I wasn’t going to help him pick up women. I had no interest in anyone but Zoey, and I needed to find a way to show her that.
“Come on,” Jake said. “I want the blonde, but she won’t come back to my room unless I find someone to keep her friend entertained.”
I shook my head. “Sorry, man. You’re on your own.”
“You’re no fun.”
I didn’t argue that point with him. Ryan was my friend, but I didn’t know Jake well. Based on the knowledge I did have about him, I doubted we had the same definition of fun.
Jake was a player. He wasn’t manipulative or hateful toward women, from what I could tell, but he lived for the casual hookup.
That had never been my thing. Even back in high school, my friends used to lightly tease me for being a romantic.
I didn’t need to be in love to have sex, but I preferred to be in a relationship.
I liked having an emotional connection to my partners.
So, even if I didn’t already belong to Zoey, I wouldn’t have taken Jake up on his offer.
So, Jake moved on to try to find someone else to help him, and I went into the water. I would’ve rather tried to talk to Zoey again, but while Jake distracted me, Leanne and Kelsie arrived. Zoey was chatting with them now.
I loved to swim. It was good exercise, and I paid a lot of money every month to be a member of a private athletic club back in Chicago because they had an Olympic-sized indoor pool.
Swimming in the ocean was a completely different experience. The pool I was used to was heated and full of chlorine. This turquoise saltwater was cool against my skin and punching through the waves was a hell of a lot harder than moving smoothly through still water.
I found that I got tired quickly, and I headed back toward the shore just as most of our group started to gather around a volleyball net set up on the beach. I shook the water out of my hair, knowing that the sun would dry me off in no time, and headed toward the others.
Ryan grinned when I reached them. “Perfect! Ford is on our team.”
The group had split, so I went to stand next to Ryan and Leanne. Jake was standing with the other group on the other side of the net, holding a volleyball.
“I can’t believe you want to do this again,” he said, eyes locked on Ryan with a challenging look. “You remember when we visited Aunt Cathy in Malibu? I kicked your ass at beach volleyball.”
Ryan scoffed. “That was fifteen years ago. We were kids.”
“And I’ve only gotten better with age.” He tossed the volleyball into the air and caught it with a smirk on his face.
“Should we put some money on it?” Ryan asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Why do you two always have to turn everything into a bet?” Zoey asked with one hand on her curvy hip. She was standing next to Heather and Kelsie, like she was planning to play.
Oh, hell no.
Without thinking, I ducked under the net and marched right up to her. “What are you doing? You’re not going to play volleyball.”
I could feel everyone’s eyes on us, but for once, I didn’t care. There was no way I was going to let this happen.
“You don’t get to decide that, Ford.” Zoey rolled her eyes, as if I was being ridiculous.
“You didn’t feel well last night, remember?” I chose my words carefully, aware that she probably didn’t want anyone to know about the pregnancy yet. Most women waited a while before sharing news like that. “I think you should sit this one out.”
“You sick, Zo?” Ryan asked.
“No,” she said, her eyes still on me. I could see the anger simmering there. “But even if I was, I’m a nurse. I can take care of myself.”
Okay, I understood what she was saying. She was a competent medical professional, and she probably did plenty of research about pregnancy and what was safe.
Hell, I did that too, and my rational mind told me that I was overreacting. Zoey was in good shape already, and some light exercise wouldn’t hurt this early in the pregnancy.
But I was finding that it was difficult to be logical when it came to her. It was too hot out. She could overheat. And there were too many people playing. She could collide with someone and get hurt.
“And I’m a doctor,” I said, my voice a little harsher than I intended. “So, go sit in the shade.”
“We’re not at the hospital. You’re not my boss here, Ford.”
I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and take her away, preferably up to my room where I could peel that swimsuit off of her and show her just how bossy I could be.
But I was pretty sure I’d get a knee to my nuts for that.
So instead, I took a hold of her elbow and led her away from the volleyball net.
She was stiff and grumbling under her breath, but she didn’t fight me as I guided her back to the nearby resort.
It was probably because she didn’t want to make even more of a scene in front of everyone else, and I was going to take advantage of that.
“You’re a real piece of work,” she snapped once we were away from everyone else. She pulled her arm free and stopped on the wooden planks that made a walkway from the resort to the beach. “I would have been fine playing a simple game of volleyball. I wasn’t going to dive into the sand or anything.”
I sighed, knowing that she was right.
“Come to the tiki bar with me,” I said, gesturing to the outdoor pool behind the resort. “Just sit with me for a few minutes and talk. Please.”
Maybe it was my pleading that softened her. Or maybe she wanted to talk to me just as much as I wanted to talk to her, even if she wouldn’t admit it.
I didn’t really care why she walked to the tiki bar with me. I just pulled out a chair at one of the little metal tables, urging her to sit down and then opening the umbrella above the table to make sure she had shade.
She looked flushed again, so when a waiter approached the table, I ordered us two bottles of water. Zoey’s lips thinned as she sat back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. I tried not to notice how it pushed her breasts together, but it was impossible to ignore.
She was so sexy that I could barely think. And apparently, that was becoming a real problem for me lately.
“You know, this whole overly concerned thing you have going on was a little cute at dinner, but now, the act is getting old.”
Her words burned in a way that I knew was my own fault. If I hadn’t hurt her, she wouldn’t doubt me so much.
“It’s not an act,” I insisted. “I know that I shouldn’t have done that on the beach. I just… I think that I’m feeling overprotective because of our situation.”
She snorted. “Situation. That’s one way to put it.”
“I think I worry more than I should because I don’t know what’s going on with you. How you feel physically or emotionally. You’ve shut me out.” I raised a hand when she opened her mouth to speak. “And I know I brought that on myself. But I can’t help how I feel.”
“Neither can I. And right now, I feel annoyed.”
The waiter brought our waters, and I relaxed a bit when she gulped down half of hers.
“I’m sorry,” I said, suddenly embarrassed by my reaction on the beach. “I’ll try to tone it down, okay? But I don’t think I’ll be able to stop worrying about you. I just want to take care of you and our little sweet pea.”
“Sweet pea?”
My cheeks felt warm, and I shifted my gaze to my water bottle, my fingers pulling at the paper label. “Yeah, that’s what I’ve been calling the baby in my mind. When I did some reading about pregnancy, I learned that’s how big it would be at six weeks. The size of a sweet pea.”
Zoey’s annoyance melted away, and she smiled at me with soft eyes. “Wow. That’s… really cute.”
I chuckled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“It was.” She took another sip of her water. “But when you say you were reading about pregnancy…”
“You know obstetrics isn’t my specialty. So, I had to do a little research to brush up on anything I need to know.”
“Anything? So… all the things that can go wrong?”
I shrugged. “Sure. The good and the bad. As the father, I think it’s important that I’m informed.”
Understanding flashed across her face. “Ford, you know how it drives us crazy when a patient uses Google to research their symptoms and then comes into the ER thinking they’ve got the bubonic plague when it’s actually a cold?”
I nodded.
“That’s basically what you did. You read all about pregnancy and got it into your head that a million things could go wrong.” She lifted her bottle of water. “I’m not going to get overheated or dehydrated. I can do light exercise. I’m healthy.”
She was right. Sliding my hand across the table, I took hers, squeezing her fingers. “I get it. Just promise that you’ll tell me if anything concerning happens, okay?”
“Of course, I will.”
She said it so easily, and it hit me that I hadn’t lost all of her trust, despite my despicable actions.
More progress.
“So… it’s a sweet pea, huh?” Zoey’s free hand went to her stomach, and I imagined her with a baby bump. It was a more satisfying mental image than I ever could have expected.
“For now.”
“So, does that mean you’ll change the nickname as it grows?”
I grinned. “Why not? We can do raspberry at eight weeks and plum at twelve weeks. Avocado at sixteen weeks.”
Zoey laughed. “I’m not so sure about that last one. But I am impressed that you memorized so much about the size of the baby.”
“I might be a little obsessed.” I looked into her brown eyes. “I hope the baby looks just like you.”
To my surprise, Zoey’s smile slipped away, and she pulled her hand away from me. Her shoulders hunched, and her eyebrows pulled together.
“Don’t do that, Ford.” Her voice was so sad that I felt like my heart was being squeezed by a fist. “Keep focusing on the baby, but don’t make it about us.
We’re not together, but we can be good parents anyway.
You can be involved with the pregnancy and the birth, and we’ll figure out custody after the baby is born. ”
Something desperate and overwhelming moved through my body. I couldn’t let this happen, couldn’t allow Zoey to shut me out of her life. I needed her. I loved her, and I hated myself for never saying it before I ruined things.
I had to make this right.
Panic driving my actions, I didn’t allow myself to think about what I was doing as I slid from my chair and onto one knee beside the table. I grabbed her hand again and looked into her wide eyes.
“It doesn’t have to be like that, Zo. We can have it all. Will you marry me?”