SHE’S REALLY HERE
PATRICK
A fter leaving Jeremiah’s place, I was a mix of every kind of emotion. There was no way in hell I could go back to the wedding barn and work on it. Typically, the resort was my reprieve. Burying myself in my job usually gave me a sense of peace and purpose. But right now, I knew that I’d fuck things up with my head swimming the way it currently was. I probably couldn’t even read a blueprint if I tried.
Hammer?
What’s a hammer?
I needed a beer. Or maybe a shot of something stronger that might numb me a little and dull the feelings that were waging war inside of me. I pulled over to the side of the road, reached for my phone, and fired off a text to Matthew, asking where he was. He responded instantly, the way he always did. My little brother’s phone was glued to his hand at all times, it seemed.
The saloon. Why?
On my way.
He responded again, but I was already back on the road, my phone tossed onto the seat next to me. Glancing over at Jasper, I realized that I should probably drop him off at the house. Who knew how long I’d be drowning my sorrows at the bar for? And Bella had yelled at me the last time I brought him inside.
“Gotta take you home, boy. Sorry,” I apologized to my dog like I was hurting his feelings somehow.
I actually hated leaving him behind. It was rare when Jasper couldn’t go with me to wherever I was going. And whenever I was gone, all he did was sit on the couch and stare out the window the entire time, just waiting for me to come back. Nothing made him happier than having me home.
I wondered if that was how I looked to Addi. Just a boy, waiting for his owner to come back and play with him again.
And now, I’m comparing myself to my damn dog.
But I couldn’t ignore the similarities. Hadn’t I been basically staring out the window the last few years, waiting for her to pull into the driveway so I could wag my proverbial tail once more and give her kisses to welcome her home?
I rolled my eyes and shook my head in some vain attempt to stop from sounding like a fool. Even if only to myself. But seeing Addi in pictures over the last few years had been one thing. Having her here in the flesh took my damn breath away.
I’d planned on playing it cool, like her dad had suggested, but when it came right down to it, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t sit back and wait. I couldn’t stay away from her. And when I saw her for the first time in almost four years, I sure as hell couldn’t not touch her.
My lack of self-control shocked me at first. But the second she was in my arms, my skin felt like it was on fire, our chemistry igniting like it had been simmering on a stove the entire time we’d been apart. All it took was one measly touch to bring it back to life in full force, the inferno inside of me raging out of control once more.
I’d thought I had every single thing about Addi committed to memory, but the mind was a funny thing. It could be tricked, warped, and manipulated. It could be lied to, exaggerated, or just plain wrong.
I’d forgotten things. Like the way she avoided eye contact whenever she was nervous. Or the exact shade of her eyes when the sun hit them and the way they lightened or darkened depending on what she wore.
Or how perfectly her body melded into mine. She’d always fit there like she had been made for me, but I’d grown since she’d been gone, filled out in ways that might have made her not fit me anymore. But she still did. Our bodies curved and sloped and dipped perfectly together.
Seeing her reminded me of just how badly I wanted her in my life. I’d thought I knew. I’d thought I had it figured out, but being in her presence blew it all to hell.
I needed to be buried inside of her the way I needed all of my internal organs to work in order to stay alive. Without Addi, I was existing on some kind of life support… alive, but not really living.
After filling up Jasper’s food and water bowls, I headed back out to my truck and over to the saloon, where I knew my brother was waiting for me. Glancing up at one of my second-story windows, I spotted Jasper’s head as he watched me drive away, looking somber.
This dog and I were the same.
When I pulled into the gravel lot at the saloon, I tried to find Matthew’s giant truck before spotting it, away from all the other cars toward the rear. The guy did not like getting his precious vehicle dinged. I maneuvered next to his monstrosity and parked, noting the vast differences between our two trucks as I hopped out.
When I pushed through the door, Matthew leaped off of the barstool where he sat and pulled me in for a hug. “Everything okay?”
He was so damn affectionate sometimes.
“Addi’s here.”
His arms dropped to his sides as he leveled me with a look. “ Here , here? Like in Sugar Mountain?”
In all the chaos and rush of Jeremiah getting hurt, I’d forgotten to tell either one of my brothers that she was coming home. Or maybe I hadn’t forgotten so much as kept it to myself for the time being, which had been all of twenty-four hours.
Matthew grabbed me by the arm and tugged me toward the row of barstools. I hated that he was taller than I was. When he plopped back down on his seat and I did the same next to him, Bella appeared.
“Thanks for not bringing the dog this time.” She grinned, and I knew I’d made the right decision by leaving Jasper at home, even if I hated doing it. “So, to what do I owe the pleasure? You’re never here, Patrick. Well, rarely,” Bella added.
Matthew stared at her like he might climb over the bar and mount her in front of everyone. Either that or piss all over her leg to mark his territory.
“Addison’s here,” Matthew whispered, and Bella’s eyes grew wide.
Every single person in Sugar Mountain knew my and Addi’s history. And apparently, they all had an opinion on it. Even Bella, who was years younger than we were, knew what her being home meant to me.
“So, beer or something stronger?” Her expression was filled with sympathy, like my heart might roll right out of my chest and onto the bar top if she didn’t help me numb it.
“Stronger,” Matthew and I both answered at the same time.
“Do you have a preference?” she asked.
I shrugged. “Not really.”
“Do you want to forget it all or just numb the pain a little?” She leaned toward us, putting her palms on top of the bar for balance.
“Forget it all,” Matthew answered for me at the same time that I responded with, “Just numb the pain.”
Bella shook her head. “I wasn’t asking you.” She pointed a finger at Matthew, and he pretended like she’d wounded him, clutching a hand to his chest as he leaned back.
“Trust me, I noticed,” he said, but she simply rolled her eyes like he annoyed her.
“No one asks you to come here every day,” she snapped at my little brother, and he made a huffing sound, like her opinion wasn’t what mattered.
“I only come here when you’re working,” he said, like that should have changed everything. “So, it’s not every day.”
“I’m aware. No one asked you to do that either.”
“I like to be around you,” he said so honestly that it made me laugh.
“I don’t know why.” Bella turned her back to us and grabbed something from the shelf.
We both watched her pour the amber liquid into two separate glasses before handing one to each of us. “Sip it. Don’t shoot it,” she instructed.
I did as she’d asked.
Matthew downed the whole thing in one gulp, and I laughed again as he tried to stop himself from wincing.
“Why don’t you ever listen?” she chastised, and he gave her his signature smirk that made most women melt.
“What’s the fun in that?” was his stupid response.
She walked away and toward the opposite end of the bar, where she started washing glasses.
“I don’t think she likes you very much,” I said, trying to get his attention away from Bella and back on me.
His blue eyes widened. “Girl’s been in love with me since she was fourteen years old.”
“Well, she’s not a teenager anymore.”
“No shit.”
“What’s the deal with the two of you anyway?” It was nice to not think about Addi for all of ten seconds while I focused on Matthew instead.
“No deal. She always acts like she’s mad at me, but I don’t know why.”
“’Cause you’re an idiot?”
He shoved at my shoulder, almost making me fall off the stool, and before I could shove him back, the bar door swung open, and my body instantly stiffened. I sensed her presence without even having to turn around and acknowledge it. Matthew had been right when he teased me about my dick being on hiatus those few months back. Someone had definitely pressed the pause button on the big guy in my pants, but he was on full alert now, waking up at the mere thought of my girl, begging to be let loose so he could run free and right to her.
“Damn,” Matthew said low and under his breath.
I finally turned around to see Addison and her sister, Sarina, waltzing into the saloon and grabbing the attention of every single male— and female —in the place.
“That her little sister?” Matthew asked, and I watched him scan the length of her way-too-underdressed body.
I smacked him. “Don’t even think about it,” I warned.
He let out a laugh that told me he’d do exactly that—and probably more if Sarina let him.
When I glanced down the bar toward Bella at the other end, I noticed her watching Matthew with what looked like hurt in her eyes. All the pieces fell into place in that moment. Bella knew Matthew’s reputation. She’d probably seen him in action more times than she wanted to. He was a player. A womanizer. The kind of guy who slept around without any strings attached. And Bella wanted all the strings.
It made perfect sense. And my stupid brother was too oblivious to see it. He seemed to have really great vision when it came to me and Thomas, but he couldn’t see his own love life for shit.
Matthew hopped out of his barstool and whistled, drawing even more attention toward us. I blocked out everyone else in the bar and pretended like they weren’t watching our every move. When Matthew reached Addi, he picked her up and spun her around as she smiled, her face filled with pure joy. The two of them had always been close. After I’d graduated high school, they spent most of their time together since they were in the same grade. I’d always appreciated the bond they’d formed back then. I sort of hated it right now.
“God, I’ve missed you so much,” he said as he kissed the side of her head, and I clenched my jaw.
“I missed you too,” she said before wiping her eyes and glancing around the bar, her cheeks turning pink in response.
“Why did you leave us? Why won’t you come back? He’s no fun without you.” Matthew gave a head nod in my direction, and I groaned out loud, taking another sip of my drink, relishing in the way it burned on the way down.
“Was he ever fun?” Sarina asked sarcastically but with a grin, so I knew she was teasing, but it still stung a little. I didn’t even know her, yet she was making assumptions about me… out loud.
“Hey,” I fired back.
“You’re fine. You’re fun. Whatever. Hi. I’m Sarina.”
Sarina shoved her way between Matthew and Addi, sticking her hand out toward my brother for him to shake. He moved it away and pulled her in for a hug instead.
“I know. I’ve seen your picture online,” he flirted.
I glanced over toward Bella, who was still firmly rooted at the opposite end of the bar, watching the interaction with an unreadable expression on her face.
If she was hurt or upset by Matthew’s current actions, she was definitely trying to hide it. But when her eyes met mine and I waved one hand in the air, she shrugged, as if to say that she was used to Matthew’s flirtatious behavior.
Addi made her way to my side, and I had to stop my hands from wrapping around her waist and pulling her onto my lap, where she belonged. It was so natural, touching her, holding her, having her be an extension of my body.
“Bella!” she shouted as soon as she saw her in the far corner, drying off a glass.
Bella’s face lit up, and it warmed my heart to see. I loved knowing that Addi was so well liked. Hoped that it might help bring her back home. A part of me felt like she needed the reminder that all of Sugar Mountain adored her, not just me.
“Hi, Addison. It’s so good to see you.” Bella grinned as they reached across the bar and squeezed each other’s hands. “You look incredible,” Bella added, and some sort of sound of agreement slipped out of me.
“Thank you. So do you. The last time I saw you, you were just a teenager. You’re all grown up now.” Addi grinned, and Bella twirled, her hair floating around her. “I heard you were working here. And that you might have a stalker.” She gave a nod toward Matthew, who was still being chatted up by Sarina, whose hand was currently down the length of his biceps as he flexed.
“I heard that, Addison. And it’s not stalking. It’s called keeping her company,” Matthew chimed in, surprising the three of us.
I’d assumed he wasn’t listening. At least not to our conversation.
“She didn’t ask for your company,” Bella shouted in response, an annoyed look on her face as her eyes zeroed in on where Sarina’s hand was touching him.
I thought she might start breathing fire with how jealous she seemed.
“But she likes it,” Matthew shouted back.
Bella rolled her eyes as she frowned. “Keep telling yourself that, Romeo.”
“You know I will, Bells.” He gave her a wink, and she turned her back to him and faced us.
“He’s the worst,” she whispered toward both me and Addi as we leaned toward her, the massive bar separating us.
“It’s ’cause he likes you,” Addi said, and Bella reared her head back in disbelief.
“He likes everyone. Case in point.” She waved toward Matthew and Sarina. “No offense, Addison. I’m sure your sister’s great.”
“She is, but she just likes the attention,” Addi said, clearly trying to give Bella some peace of mind. “That”—Addi glanced at the two of them—“doesn’t mean a thing. To either of them. I promise.”
I knew what she was trying to do, but I also knew that it wasn’t helping. Whether it was serious or not, Bella cared. And she didn’t like it. I put a hand on Addi’s arm, encouraging her to sit in the empty stool next to mine.
“Sit,” I said, and she dropped onto it.
“Happy?” she asked me with a smile.
“Getting there,” I responded honestly.
I’d only be truly happy if she moved back home and in with me.
“Can I get you a drink?” Bella looked tentative, like she was suddenly afraid to interrupt whatever was going on between me and my ex.
Addi glanced at the glass I held in my hand. “What are you drinking?” she asked.
“I don’t know. Bella made it,” I said.
Bella laughed. “I didn’t make it. I poured it. It’s just whiskey.”
“You drink whiskey now?” Addi asked, her eyes soft and sad, like she’d missed out on some sort of monumental personality shift or something.
“Not typically.”
“I can make you something else, Addison. Something pretty,” Bella said as she shoved a tiny menu across the top of the bar.
Addi reached for it, her eyes scanning each and every drink and the description. Her finger ran across the words as she took them in, her lips moving as she read.
“Bella, did you create these cocktails?” Her eyes were as wide as the smile on her face, clearly impressed.
“Yeah.”
“She’s an incredible mixologist,” Matthew answered as he came to a stop next to me.
“How would you know? You only drink beer,” Bella said, and for once, my brother lacked a comeback.
“So, Sarina, how was meeting Jeremiah? You haven’t seen him since you left, right?” Matthew asked.
Sarina’s face damn near lit up. “No one told me how handsome he was. Or how built!” she exclaimed, and the five of us laughed.
“Yeah. Your dad could quite literally kick all our asses if he wanted to,” Matthew said, and I gave her a look that told her it was true. “He scares me.”
“I thought you used to be some big-time professional athlete. You’re scared of a fifty-year-old man?” Sarina teased.
“Damn straight, I am. He’s bigger than most of the guys in the NHL,” Matthew explained.
I glanced at Addi, who was half paying attention to the conversation and still reading the menu Bella had handed her.
“Want to try one of those?” I asked.
Her eyes met mine, and I fucking melted.
This woman is my undoing.
“They all sound so good. But I think I’d like to try a Christmas cosmo,” Addi said as Sarina finally sat down next to her.
I might have blown out an actual sigh of relief at the fact that she’d chosen a stool away from Matthew instead of sitting next to him.
“Ooh, me too. A Christmas cosmo sounds great!” Sarina chirped. “Very Sex and the City .”
“Bella, do people order these? I mean, how popular are they?” Addi was all business now. I could practically see the wheels spinning in her head. Knowing her, she probably had a seasonal menu paired with the drinks already listed in her mind.
Bella looked a little dejected. “The saloon really isn’t my target audience, you know? They’re more the beer and bourbon type. But the tourists seem to like them when they come in.”
Addi nodded, like this made perfect sense to her. “That’s what I thought. Do you like bartending?”
“I love creating new drinks and experimenting with flavors. It’s so much fun,” Bella answered with a big smile. “But I don’t feel like it’s really necessary or appreciated here.”
“Speaking of”—Addi thumbed toward the saloon doors—“what’s with the fancy-looking restaurant out there on Main?”
Chills raced down my body. I’d forgotten all about the place, and I should have known that Addi was going to see it at some point while she was in town. I tried to hide my discomfort and hoped she wouldn’t notice.
“Oh, some tourist tried to come in here and open a five-star, thinking the town would support his endeavor,” Matthew answered before I could.
Addi let out the sweetest laugh. “Let me guess. It lasted three months?”
“Four,” I said, trying to get my body to calm the fuck down.
I was a shit liar, and Addi could always see through me. I didn’t want her to put these pieces together quite yet.
“I noticed all the furniture and kitchen equipment were still in there. Is the person coming back for it or something?”
I should have known that Addi would have put her face up against the glass to get a good look inside.
“Heard the guy left it all,” I said, and everyone looked at me like they wondered how I knew that little tidbit of information.
“No one does that,” Addi said, her face sporting that signature look whenever something didn’t make sense. “You don’t close a five-star restaurant and leave everything behind. You sell it off. But you don’t leave it.”
I made a noncommittal expression and was thankful when Bella spoke up. “It’s been like that for over a year now. Just sitting there, like it’s waiting to open when it’s never going to again.”
“That’s so weird,” Addi said, her mind clearly racing.
“I’ll get started on those drinks,” Bella said.
She turned around and started reaching for the ingredients she needed to make two Christmas cosmos, whatever those were.
“It doesn’t make sense.” Addi was still fixating.
Sarina cleared her throat. “How come it couldn’t stay open? I don’t get it.”
It was in that moment that Sarina reminded us all that she wasn’t from here. She was a stranger, just like that restaurant guy had been, with no clue as to how Sugar Mountain worked.
“How do I say this nicely?” Matthew tried to explain. “Uh, Sugar Mountain residents don’t like being taken advantage of.”
Sarina shifted on her stool, uncrossing and then recrossing her legs. “How is opening a nice restaurant taking advantage of the residents?”
“Because that guy didn’t care about the town. Or the people who lived here. He just wanted to cater to the fancy tourists. You can’t build an entire business based around tourist season and pretend like the regulars don’t exist or live here year-round,” I said, hoping that my explanation made a little more sense.
“So, you guys don’t like outsiders,” Sarina said plainly. “You’re tougher than New Yorkers.”
Bella started shaking the contents in a shaker; the sound of ice hitting the tin cylinder was loud and distracting. We all focused on her as she opened the top and poured the contents into two chilled martini glasses before putting a cranberry with a sprig of green on top.
“Damn. That’s really pretty,” I said as soon as she slid the glasses toward the girls.
“Nice touch.” Addi smiled at the cranberry-sprig thing before taking a tentative sip. “Oh, Bella. Your talents are truly being wasted here. You could open your own cocktail bar, you know.”
“This is really good,” Sarina agreed as she downed half the contents in one gulp. “Now, I want to try them all.”
Bella laughed. “Thanks.”
Sarina finished off her drink in another gulp and shoved the empty glass away from her. “I’ll take the next one on the menu,” she said with a smirk.
“I mean it about the bar. Look what your drinks do to people.” Addi laughed, and Bella offered her what looked like a polite smile.
“I don’t know if that’s something I want to do. Owning a business is a huge commitment. I don’t mind working for other people. I think I might prefer it actually,” she explained.
Addi nodded her head. “I completely understand that.”
“Plus, Bells is doing real estate now too,” Matthew chimed in.
He was always chiming in.
“Shush.” Bella waved Matthew off. “I’m just starting out, and I’m not even sure how it will go or if I’ll even like it or not. It’s just something different that I wanted to try.”
“I think that’s great, Bella. Whatever makes you happy, but I bet the real estate business here is hard, isn’t it?” Addi asked genuinely as she finished off her own cosmo.
“There’s limited inventory. And not a lot of turnover,” Bella said with a shrug. “And people don’t always go through realtors in order to sell. Especially if they’re keeping it in the family or selling to a neighbor or someone they know.”
“I can see that.” Addi frowned in response to Bella’s explanation. “How’s your brother doing?”
Matthew let out a sound of disapproval as Bella frowned.
Bella’s older brother had been Matthew’s best friend in high school. He’d spent all of his time at their home when he couldn’t bear to be around us guys at the house. Especially after our mom died.
“He moved to the city!” The displeasure in Bella’s voice was beyond obvious. “Can you believe that? Met some girl here one summer and followed her down the mountain.”
Addi’s jaw dropped open. It wasn’t that we didn’t know people who had grown up and moved away; it was just that there were certain ones we expected to stay forever. Bella’s brother had been one of them.
“He. Moved?” She enunciated each word slowly, like they were difficult to speak.
“Says he’s never coming back either.” Bella stuck out her hip defiantly and put her hand on it.
“Sound familiar?” Matthew asked.
Addi spun so fast that I thought she might get whiplash.
She pointed a finger at my brother. “Hey! I never said I wasn’t coming back.”
“Well, are you?” he fired back just as quick, and when Addi didn’t respond, Matthew huffed out an annoyed sound. “I stand by my statement then.”
“You don’t have to be a dick about it,” Sarina suddenly piped up, angling her body around Addi’s stool to look at Matthew through narrowed eyes.
“I don’t, no. It’s a choice,” he said, all smug, but still clearly flirting.
Sarina enjoyed it. Bella did not. She removed herself from the situation and started working on making some new drinks. At least that was what I assumed she was doing. I leaned toward my brother and spun him around so both of our backs were to the bar, and I angled us away from Addi and her sister.
“If you want any chance in hell of ever being with Bella, I’m telling you not to leave this bar with Sarina today. And stop flirting with her for two seconds if you can help it.”
He gave me a confused look. “Why? What does one have to do with the other?”
“Seriously? You can’t put that together on your own?” I asked, my tone insinuating that he was a total dumbass.
I watched him shoot a look toward Bella, and even though he clearly did not get what I was trying to tell him, he nodded anyway.
“Oh, hey. One more thing,” I said before I could forget to bring it up.
“What?” he said, his tone irritated.
“Do not tell Addison about the house,” I warned.
He instantly frowned. “Why would I tell her about the house?”
“Because you think you’re a matchmaker or something, and I don’t need your help when it comes to her.”
He let out a laugh loud enough that people turned to see where it had come from. “If I hadn’t texted her, you’d still think that New York douchebag was her boyfriend. So, you’re welcome for that.”
My jaw instantly clenched as the photographs of her and that guy flashed in my mind. “Just don’t tell her.”
He turned serious and put his hand on my shoulder. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“A few more of those, and you might.” I nodded toward his drink, which had been refilled, thanks to a certain bartender.
“I think Bells might be trying to kill me,” he said as he glanced at the glass.
“Or ensuring that your dick won’t work if you try to use it later,” I said with half a grin.
“She would never.” Matthew’s blue eyes grew wide.
“I think she would,” I answered with a laugh. “Can you blame her?”
If torturing Matthew was Bella’s new favorite pastime, I might have to start hanging at the saloon more often, just to witness it. It would be a hell of a lot more fun than what I’d be going through once Addi left again.