30. Knox
“ I ’m sorry your truck is acting up. I kinda love that old thing,” Indie says from behind the steering wheel of her car.
“I know. It’s a real shame,” I tell her, knowing full well that my truck is fine.
“So why did we need to come all the way out here? I’m always down for a hike, but it’s getting late, and I would have been perfectly happy with you making me dinner, rubbing my feet,” she says, flashing me a smile before continuing, “and just staying in with Hazey tonight.”
I believe her, but I also want to show her that life with me, though much slower paced than she may be used to, doesn’t have to be boring.
“As much as I love a quiet night in, this is also an apology of sorts, if you remember,” I tell her.
“Yes, I remember. You also mentioned dinner, but where are we possibly going to be getting dinner out here?” she asks, taking one hand off the steering wheel and gesturing out her window .
Last night I told her that I didn’t like going to the movies.
She was shocked and hurt to hear that even after I explained that I don’t care for large crowds, but more than that, I don’t like watching movies with other people because I don’t like gauging my own reactions against others.
She didn’t like my explanation at all. I made it even worse when I said that going to the movies is silly.
I’m not exactly a glass-half-full guy, but I never want any cranky thoughts I have to dull her shine. So when she arrived at her home this afternoon, she found a note attached to her door.
I’m sorry I was an ass.
Have dinner with me?
-Knox
What she doesn’t know is it took me most of the day to set our date up.
“The turnoff is just around the corner up here,” I instruct, as we drive up the side of the mountain.
“Okay? I’m still missing where the restaurant is going to be. I’m fairly easygoing, Knox, but you don’t want to see me hangry,” she threatens.
I chuckle. “I wouldn’t dream of it, Honey.”
She turns onto the dirt road, following it a little further until the lights come into view.
“What’s this?” she asks me, eyes wide, looking between me and my truck that’s parked in the middle of a wildflower field.
The bed is filled with pillows and blankets, and I have Christmas lights strung up around it.
Behind it is a white sheet attached to two wooden posts that we’ll watch our movie on.
Alder dropped off our food about five minutes ago in the cab of the truck.
“ That is where we’re having dinner tonight,” I tell her.
“You’re kidding. You did all this for me?”
“I did.”
“I don’t know what to say. No one’s ever done anything like this for me,” she says, her voice full of wonder.
“Happy to be the first, Honey,” I tell her.
She parks the car and climbs over the middle console to sit in my lap, kissing me until I’m desperate for more before opening my door and sliding out.
“This is so beautiful, Knox,” she tells me as she climbs into the back of my truck. “Thank you.”
I open the door and reach in to get the food and the wooden slab to lay across the truck bed that will act as a table for us.
“You don’t have to thank me, Indie. This is partly my apology, remember?”
“In that case. You’re forgiven.”
I look up at her, my pulse stuttering at the sight of her standing in the back of my truck, smiling at me like I’m some kind of hero for stringing some lights together and borrowing a projector from the hotel. I never want her to stop looking at me like this.
“You’re so beautiful, Indie.” My words cause her smile to widen.
“God, you’re so gone for me, Holloway…aren’t you?” The question is laced with uncertainty. Does she not know?
I hop up into the back of the truck, gripping the sides of her neck, her hands coming up to grip my forearms. “Yeah, Indie Baby. I am,” I tell her, leaning down to brush her lips with my own, kissing her like she’s the oxygen I need to breathe .
Once settled into our pile of blankets and pillows, I set the projector up on top of the truck behind us.
“What are we watching?” Indie asks excitedly, dipping her chips into the guacamole.
“One of my favorites. I think you’re gonna like it.”
“Ohh, now I’m even more excited. Another glimpse into Fort Knox.” She’s said this before, told me it was hard to get to know me. I don’t want to make it hard for her.
“Not to you, Honey. You can see whatever you want.” She smiles, leaning forward to kiss my lips.
“Thank you. This is so special to me. You’re really special to me,” she confides.
“Good to know. I think you’re alright too,” I bait.
She giggles. “Just alright?”
I don’t know if I have the words right now to tell her how I feel.
Instead, I lean over her, sliding my hand under her torso and tugging her down the back of the truck so she’s lying flat against it beneath me.
She reaches up and cups my jaw, pulling my mouth to hers.
I don’t want to keep my hands off her, keep my mouth off hers.
Kissing her like this has a drugging effect on me. I know it must be her because if kissing felt like this for everyone, I’m not sure how anyone stops doing it. The outside world fades, just her lips and her little moans remain in focus. She licks inside my mouth, tasting me, teasing me.
I slide my hand down her neck to her chest, groaning when I find her braless. I swipe my thumb over her nipple until it pebbles, then give it a pinch. Her mouth opens on a gasp and lets me slide my tongue in and swallow it, smiling at her reaction to me.
We kiss for a while longer, our hands exploring each other— teasing. When Indie’s stomach starts growling, I sit back to look at her. Kiss her lips once more, and then I set our food out on the wooden slab in front of us.
“Let’s get you fed, Honey. I don’t want you suffering,” I say.
“If that's suffering, I think I want to spend the rest of my life doing it,” she mutters quietly, curling into my side and resting her head against my shoulder. My whole body heats with the sentiment. I kiss the top of her head, wrapping my arm around her.
I know it’s just an off handed comment. Meant to be funny, but doing anything with Indie forever is exactly what I want to be doing.
I hit play on the projector, and the movie starts. Indie lets out a delighted squeal.
“Are you joking?” She laughs, facing me.
“I wouldn’t joke about this,” I tell her.
“Is this really one of your favorite movies?”
“Cross my heart,” I say, making an X over my chest.
She kisses me again. Hard. I never want to stop kissing her. I could live a thousand years, and nothing would come close to the feel of her lips on mine.
“This is the best surprise date I’ve ever been on,” she muses, leaning back into me. I reach to my side into the bag I stashed here earlier and pull out the candy, laying it out in front of her.
“Cherry candies?”
“You said it was your favorite flavor.”
“It was, but I think I have a new one.” Oh, well, now the candy seems silly.
She opens a box of candies, popping one into her mouth. Turning her head, she looks up at me. “Come here,” she whispers, and I lean down, letting her press her sour-cherry lips to mine.
“ That’s my favorite flavor,” she whispers, her words hitting me directly in the chest.
Being her favorite anything makes me feel like I’m ten feet tall.
Indie choosing to spend her nights with me, quietly reading or playing with Hazel in the wildflowers instead of going out or having wild nights like a twenty-something should be able to, tugs at me, leaving me with the nagging question I seem to always come back to.
Will I be able to give her the life she should have? Am I enough for her?