Chapter 10
Chapter 10
With a sharp inhale, Jane sat up in bed and looked around her chamber. What was that noise? Some vague sound had awakened her, but now as she strained her ears—silence.
She sat stock-still and bit her lip. Would whatever it was happen again? Maybe if it would, she could then identify whatever had disturbed her slumber. The clock on the mantel ticked in a steady rhythm while she stared at the glowing coals in the grate. Her entire body jolted when the noise occurred again. She was a silly creature indeed! She had been waiting for the sound and when it happened, she jumped like a frightened rabbit.
She hastened to crawl out of bed and don her slippers and dressing gown. Once she lit a chamberstick, she made her way to the door. No sooner had she opened it than she found little Juliana in the passageway with tears streaming down her face.
“Why, Juliana, what are you doing here in the middle of the night?”
“Where is Papa? He is not in his bedchamber.” The little girl sniffled, the quivering of her lip discernible in the candlelight.
“Is he not?” Where else would he be at this hour but asleep like the rest of the household?
Jane offered the child her hand, and the girl led her two doors down and pushed the panel further open. A good-sized room stood before them decorated in darker colours with rich wood tones, but no Henry.
“Are you sure this is his room?”
Juliana nodded with another sniffle.
As Jane glanced about her, she frowned. Wait a moment. She released the child’s hand and stepped out to count the doors. When she returned, she opened the door on the right wall and entered a sitting room. With her fingers tight around the chamberstick, she forced herself forward until she walked through the next door, which led to…her suite. She had been put in the mistress’s rooms? Had that been intentional? She bit her cheek. It had to have been. The housekeeper had said the duke had made the specific request for Jane to have that room.
“Miss Montfowd?” The small voice came from the doorway behind her.
“Yes, forgive me. We should return you to the nursery. If your governess finds you missing, she will be terribly worried.” She hastened the child back through, closing the doors behind her. It would not do to reveal she had crept through to the duke’s bedchamber.
“But I had a bad dream,” said Juliana as they started towards the nursery. “Papa always sits with me after.”
“Well, since I do not know where he is, I can sit with you. Would you like that?”
The child nodded, and Jane lifted her into her arms. She was not heavy, and carrying the little girl would hurry their return to the nursery.
Once they reached the rooms Juliana shared with her sister, she set the child on her feet and guided her back to bed. Jane sat on the side of the mattress, but Juliana patted her pillow.
“Lie down with me.”
Jane could do naught but oblige her. Why did this in some way seem similar to when she and Lizzy would share a bedchamber at Uncle Gardiner’s and talk the night away? Juliana was by no means one she could speak to as she did Lizzy.
As soon as she lay beside the little girl, she combed Juliana’s curls from her face. Not long after, the child’s eyes began to drop while Jane continued to stroke her hair. Whether Juliana fell completely asleep or not, Jane did not know.
“Your Grace!” said Miss Fletcher. “We had not expected you so early this morning. Lady Juliana is still sleeping.”
He frowned at the servant who stood in the doorway of the nursery. “Is she well? She does not usually sleep so late.” The governess’s surprised expression and high tone were unusual. Why was she alarmed at his appearance? She had never been so before.
The lady wrung her hands before her. “I believe she had a nightmare.”
“A nightmare? She usually seeks me out when that happens. Pray, do not tell me she was wandering the house for most of the night.” That had been his sole reservation about moving to another suite of rooms during the Montford’s stay. Mrs. Deaton had wanted to give Miss Montford a lovely bedchamber near her grandparents’ suite of rooms with a prospect over the formal gardens, but he had trod over the housekeeper’s plans and insisted she sleep in the mistress’s suite. Why? A part of him insisted she belonged in those rooms, so that was where she needed to stay.
“No, Your Grace.” Miss Fletcher averted her eyes. “She was not out all night. It seems she was returned to her bed.”
His chin jolted back, and he strode past the young woman, who shifted in an abrupt manner when she realized he would not be kept out. As he made the corner to where the girls’ beds were, it was evident Juliana was not alone. The pink slippers and feminine feet at the foot were too large to be one of his daughters. When the full bed came into view, he came to a sudden halt. Jane was sleeping peacefully next to his youngest daughter, her golden hair in a long braid that draped over her shoulder and fell over her chest. The ribbon of her dressing gown was untied, and the fabric gaped open enough at her chest to see a portion of the tempting swell beneath.
“I thought to let them wake up on their own,” said the governess in a whisper.
“Miss Montford will be missed at breakfast.” Why could he think of nothing better to say?
After wrenching his gaze from the creamy flesh revealed to him, he spent the next moment staring while the two of them slept peacefully. Jane had left her bed in the middle of the night to be of aid to Juliana—had squeezed onto a small cot with his daughter to comfort her. His chest filled with an overpouring of some emotion he had only experienced when he held his girls for the first time—well, it was not quite the same except in intensity. Jane’s gentle nature and caring heart had ensnared his own in a hold so tight, he was unsure if he could breathe unless she loved him in return.
After shaking himself from his reverie, he stepped around the bed, and with a gentle hand to Jane’s arm, leaned over closer to her ear. “Jane, you must wake up.”
Her eyes fluttered open, and his heart stuttered. Even fresh from her dreams, she was lovely. For the rest of his days, he would have no problems waking to her beautiful countenance just as she was. When had he lost himself so completely?
Jane’s eyebrows drew down for a moment before she gazed up at him, her cheeks turning a brilliant shade of crimson. “Your Grace, forgive me. Juliana was wandering the house, searching for you, and could not find you. Since I knew not where you were, I brought her back to the nursery and meant to remain until she slept once more, but—”
“Do not worry yourself.” He held out his hand to help her rise. “I know Juliana would have asked you to stay until she was asleep. Miss Fletcher has found me asleep in that chair on more than one occasion.” He gestured towards the seat between Jules’s and Emme’s beds.
When Jane was on her feet, she began running her hands along her dressing gown and hair, adjusting the fit just so. “I must look affright.”
“On the contrary, I believe I prefer you thus to dressed in your finery with your hair hidden under a bonnet.” Her doubtful gaze made him lift her hand so he could kiss the back. He would prefer to release her golden locks and run his fingers through them while he kissed her senseless. How he would shock her gentle nature with such a declaration!
He cleared his throat. “Come. We must return you to your bedchamber before you are missed. Your maid will not know where to find you.”
“You are correct.”
As he tugged her hand and drew her from the nursery, he glanced about the room. He would have given an instruction to Miss Fletcher, but it seemed she had made herself scarce at some moment—likely when he made to wake Jane, who would have been even more embarrassed had someone witnessed them.
“Henry?” They turned to descend the stairs.
“Yes?”
“Am I staying in the mistress’s suite?”
Once they reached the corridor, it was not long before they reached the door to his sitting room, so he drew her inside and hastened to close the door behind them. When he faced her, he maintained his hold on her hand. “Yes, I made the request of Mrs. Deaton when your grandparents agreed to come. You must understand. I came out the morning after issuing the invitation to you and your family and searched for a bedchamber that suited you. Mrs. Deaton wanted to put you in a guest room near your grandparents, but despite our not being so much as betrothed, I felt you belonged in the mistress’s.”
“The decoration is lovely.”
“The pale blue reminded me of your eyes. Besides, I wanted you in the best room Hemel Hill had to offer. Mrs. Deaton had just redecorated it last year, and somehow, she selected colours and patterns I felt suited you perfectly.”
Her cheeks turned pink, and he had to fist his hands at his sides to keep from touching her when her rosy tongue peeked out and dampened her bottom lip. She was testing his restraint every moment they were together.
She tilted her head. “How do you dress in the mornings?”
“My valet brings my clothing to the dressing room attached to my temporary chambers. I would not anger your grandfather. Even had Mrs. Deaton locked the doors between the bedchambers; your grandfather would certainly not appreciate that our rooms connected.”
“No, he would not.” She then began toying at her lip with her teeth. Was she trying to drive him mad?
He reached up to her chin and drew her lip free. “Are you bothered I placed you thus?”
She shook her head. “But I would not have you uncomfortable.”
That her first thought was of him was not surprising. “I promise I am not uncomfortable. Though I cannot explain why, I like knowing you are in these rooms. As I said, in my heart, you should be here.”
“Henry—”
The plaintive tone of his name was all that he required to draw her into his embrace. He pressed his forehead to hers. “Jane, you must know that I have developed feelings for you.”
“You have? We have not known each other for long. How is that possible?”
He curved his free hand around the back of her head. “Seeing you this morning, curled up with Juliana as you were, I could not help myself. You have made me fall in love with you—your preference for seeing the good in everyone, your kindness, and the way you love my daughters have all stolen my heart one beat at a time. You are the only lady worthy of my love and the only lady who will ever receive it because no other could replace you.”
She stared at him with wide eyes. “I was not…I do not...”
“I do not expect you to return the sentiment today. My feelings are new and happened so quickly that I know your feelings may not yet match my own. I shall not claim to be a patient man, but in this case, I shall force myself to be so.”
One side of her mouth curved. “You will force yourself to practice patience?”
“An enormous task, I assure you.”
Her light laugh washed over him, making him close the modicum of space between them and press his lips to hers. She showed no hesitation to his kiss this time, allowing him to tease her lips and caress her tongue with his. He was in heaven to be this way with her and in hell as he would eventually be forced to step back and return to being a gentleman.
The press of her soft curves against him without the impediment of stays and numerous layers of gown, petticoats, and chemise caused a guttural moan as he wrenched himself from her and took four large steps back. “You must not let me kiss you again until we are wed.” If only he was able to resist the temptation without her aid.
She laughed again. “But you have yet to propose.”
“Because I would prefer you hold me in the same regard before I make the offer of my hand.” He inhaled deeply and let out a shaky breath. “You will sit beside me at the Good Friday service?”
“I should like that.”
He pointed to the door to her bedchamber. “That door is to your room.”
“I know,” she said. “Juliana showed me which room was yours last night.”
With a nod, he withdrew further from the temptation of her. “Which is how you knew you were in the mistress’s chamber. You truly should return. I am certain your maid will be wondering where you are.” It was all he could do to croak out the words. His throat tried to close more than once as her departure was the last thing he wanted.
She made her way through, but before she closed the door, she looked back at him and smiled. He fell even deeper. How could he not? He was helpless to resist.
While she sat in the front pew of the chapel beside Henry, her body was rigid. Oh, she stood when she should and she knelt during the prayers as she should, but the scrutiny this morning was as blatant today as it was at the opera. Her grandparents, Nicholas, and Fiona sat in the row behind them, while the Hemel Hill servants and tenants filled the remainder of the nave.
By Henry’s request for her to sit with him and Lord Charles in the family pew, he had more or less announced his intentions to everyone in attendance. She would have been ignorant indeed if she had missed the meaning behind his invitation this morning. Even her grandfather raised an eyebrow when she slid into the row, and Nicholas had snickered when Henry held his prayer book between them so they could share. How difficult would it be to scheme against Nicholas in the duke’s home? She would have to enquire of Sutton upon their return. She would have fewer servants to assist her in the endeavour. That fact alone could hamper any manner of ill she wished to do.
As soon as the minister said the final words, she could have sagged back into her seat. How had a church service seemed to last so long? She had no time to rest since Henry offered her his arm, and they soon filed out with her family following behind. Lord Charles slowed to join her grandparents as they walked towards the great house.
“You were so tense during the service.”
She bit back a grimace. He had noticed. “By sitting with you, we were, for all intents and purposes, announcing our courtship to them, so the servants and tenants were all watching us—likely hoping to determine my character by it. Forgive me, but the attention was a bit unnerving.”
“We have spent most of our time together eschewing the crowds, so I cannot be surprised. As long as your unease is not due to me, I can be satisfied.”
She shook her head. If anything, he was of aid to her discomfiture. “No, I actually anticipate the events of today. On Good Friday, Longbourn and Richmond House always smell of hot cross buns, and we dye eggs. Emmeline mentioned we would do so here as well.”
“Yes, the girls are quite excited to spend that time with you.”
“With you as well.” Juliana and Emmeline had spoken of how their father had joined in the activity in the past. His eagerness to spend time with his daughters was to his credit—and he loved her. Her chest and stomach filled with butterflies that fluttered about and about. Was that sensation love? How would she know? What if she never loved him? She had no wish to injure him. Her heart hurt at the thought.
She had to admit that all of this was so confusing, yet his kisses could bring her to her knees, and she longed to lose herself more and more in his embrace. For now, maybe that was enough.