35. Ezryn
35
Ezryn
R osalina’s long hair swishes behind her as she leaves the dusk-swept balcony and enters the bedroom. Dayton’s waiting there with his usual shit-eating grin. He sweeps an arm around her as they walk back into the living space, but not before looking over his shoulder and giving me an exaggerated wink.
Stars Above and bones Below. My weight shifts forward until my helmet clunks against the doorframe. I can’t do this to myself. I can’t do this to her.
Since I inherited Spring’s Blessing, I’ve known getting close to people is dangerous. In a selfish way, the curse allowed me an excuse not to engage with the outside world. I’d check in on Spring occasionally, fulfill my needs with women who wanted as little commitment with me as I wanted with them, and then return to Castletree. To the only three people in the world I am unafraid of hurting.
I bang my head against the wall. Stupid. Clunk. Stupid. Clunk. Stupid. There are more reasons to stay away from Rosalina than there are stars in the sky. She’s a human, with a lifespan so much shorter than that of a fae. She’s Kel’s star-damned mate. I need to find my own mate to break my curse.
You’ll hurt her , a familiar voice breathes in my mind . And your brothers—your new brothers—will never forgive you. Just like I haven’t.
“Get out of my head, Kairyn,” I growl under my breath.
I stare at the fading sun. Even through my darkly tinted visor, the bursting rays burn my eyes. This would all be so much easier if she wasn’t like the literal sun itself, tenacious and warm. An unbidden smile creeps up my face as I think of her sitting in that armchair with Astrid earlier, or the light in her father’s eyes whenever she enters a room. She makes everyone feel important. Like the sun coaxing a seed to sprout through frost-covered ground, Rosalina brings out the best in those around her.
I give my head a firm shake. The sun has nearly dipped beneath the horizon, and the others need me.
I walk into the shared living space. Five bedrooms are connected to the central room, one for each of the princes and one for Rosalina. Marigold and Astrid are sharing a room on a lower level, and George has his own space down the hall.
If it was up to me, Rosalina would be far away from Farron’s first transformation while testing Caspian’s spell, but she would have none of it.
Kel, Dayton, and Rosalina stand in the doorway to Farron’s room. Farron paces beside the bed. The curtains are drawn, so I can’t tell exactly when night will fall, but I can feel it. My wolf rising within me. It’s close.
I approach Kel and ask, “Are we prepared?”
“I put a sealing enchantment on the main door to this whole chamber. No one’s coming in here unless I say so.”
At least we won’t have to worry about any poor Autumn staff wandering in and discovering four hideous beasts in the middle of the night. I quirk my head toward Farron. “How is he?”
“Agitated,” Kel mumbles.
“If things don’t go according to plan with Caspian’s spell, he’ll be hard to subdue.”
Kel’s gaze pierces into the room. “Caspian’s bargain will work.”
I sigh. Kel and I are talking, but only about important matters. There’s a distance between us, one I haven’t felt since our argument during the War of Thorns. And that took me scaling an entire mountain and Kel almost losing a hand for us to move past it.
But Kel isn’t my priority right now. I push past him into the room.
“Careful, Ez,” Dayton warns. “It’s going to happen any minute.”
I ignore him and approach Farron. He’s sitting now, back pressed against the side of his bed, staring at the wall. I squat down and place my hand on his neck, just above the thorn collar.
“Your heart’s going too fast,” I say.
Farron’s chest rises and falls, and it’s like he can’t figure out where to focus. His golden eyes race back and forth.
“Look at me, Farron.” I place my other hand on the side of his face.
He does, and I see his fear. His shame. It is a look I know too well, if only because it was the same expression looking at me in the mirror many years ago.
His mother threatened to take back the Blessing—an act not done in recent history of the Vale. The magic is only intended to move forward. I know it is an empty threat, for an attempt to retake the magic could kill them both.
“What if I’ve ruined everything, Ez?” Farron asks, voice breaking. “What if Caspian’s done something terrible to me?”
“Then we put it back together,” I tell him. “All of us.”
He closes his eyes and tears squeeze out, running down his face and over my hands. “I don’t want to hurt people anymore.”
My chest tightens, and I roughly brush his tears away with my thumb. “I’m right here, Farron. We’re staying here with you, alright? I swear, I won’t let you hurt anyone.”
He brings his hand up over top of mine. “Promise me something, Ez?”
“What?”
“If it doesn’t work,” his gaze is so intense, piercing into me, “then you’ll kill me. You’ll do it, won’t you, Ez? I need you to promise.”
I recoil, horrified, but Farron holds me tighter and pleads, “Please, Ez.”
“I… promise. Now breathe with me.” I place his hand on my chest so he can feel the rise and fall of my breath. In and out, we breathe. I am steady for him, a mountain to his gale. But the tempest claws within me. I have made a promise I cannot keep.
We take another deep breath in and out, and his pulse slows beneath my fingertips. “I think it’s about to happen, Ez.”
“I know.” I pull him toward me. Then I raise the barest edge of my helmet, just enough so I can kiss the top of his forehead. “I’m with you, little brother.”
“You need to leave,” he says, voice deep and guttural.
I stand, armor trembling with the movement, and back up to the others. Kel and Dayton have stripped down to their flesh to avoid destroying their clothes, but Rosalina’s not looking at them. She’s fixated on Farron.
I quickly shed my armor except for my helmet, which my snout pushes off during the turn. Then I stare out the big window in the living area. The sun dips below the horizon.
Energy crackles through my body as my bones snap, grow, rearrange. At first, the shift made me nauseous from the mere thought of my body mutating, but now each change feels natural. The line between the man and the wolf grows thinner with each turn.
A growl surges up my throat, but I contain it. There must not be any suspicious noises or hints of the curse. I can only imagine what Princess Niamh would do if she knew of our true nature.
Kel’s frozen beast stands in the entranceway to Farron’s room, but Dayton’s shape, dripping briny water, shoves forward to look. Then Rosalina squeezes between both of them.
Farron’s body is still changing. The man’s back arches unnaturally, his legs furry and crooked like that of a wolf. Long canines erupt from his mouth, and his eyes glow with golden hunger. Then the wolf erupts from him, the beast of rotten leaves and burnt brush.
It’s not working, I think. Caspian tricked us. Farron will be lost, and I’ll have to—
The thorn collar erupts from around Farron’s neck. It grows like a thicket, winding around his legs, his body, even his muzzle, then sinking thorns deep within the floor. The wolf remains still, only its golden eyes flitting this way and that.
“He’s trapped,” Kel growls.
I creep past them, stepping into the room. Tentatively, I sniff the thorns. Every inch of Farron is covered, except for his eyes and a bit of his nose. His wails and thrashing usually fill the night. But now, all I hear is the rapid in and out of his breath through his nostrils.
“He’s not getting out,” I say. “It worked.”
Rosalina rushes forward, but Kel snags the back of her shirt with his teeth. “He’s still dangerous, Rose,” he mutters through fabric. “We haven’t seen enough yet.”
“He’s scared,” she cries, ripping free. “Can’t you see it? He’s terrified.” She turns to Farron, hand outstretched for the tip of his snout visible through the thorns. “He’s in there, all alone—”
Kel bursts in front of her, nudging her hard in the belly with his snout. “ Out .”
Rosalina looks like she’s going to snap back, but I bump against her. “We’re only going to rouse him by being here. Let’s shut the door and let him rest.”
She wrinkles her nose, battling her tears, but nods. We leave the bedchamber and Rosalina clicks the door shut.
Dayton’s sitting there on his haunches, a fluffy pillow in his mouth, tail wagging. Rosalina strokes an affectionate hand over his ears. “You look like a golden retriever with a frisbee.”
Dayton spits the gob-covered pillow out on the floor. “Maybe we can’t be in there with him. But I can be right here.” He lays down, snout peering under the door. “I’ll always stay.”
The idea lights Rosalina up, and a smile forms on her tear-streaked cheeks. She runs to the firepit in the center of the room and starts gathering up all the pillows she can.
“What are you doing?” Kel asks.
She positions the pillows right by the door, tucking some under Dayton’s paws. Then she rushes back to grab the blankets off the couch. “Dayton’s right.” She touches the door. “Somehow, Farron will know we’re right here with him.”
I raise a wolfy brow as I watch Rosalina and Dayton create a nest of pillows and blankets. They’re a good team, I think. Both determined to see the light in even the darkest situations. My chest warms at how Dayton makes Rosalina smile. I hope he can see how happy he makes her .
As they’re debating what would be better to sleep on, piled blankets or piled pillows, Kel gives an exasperated sigh. He yanks the cushions off the couch. “These are best,” he says through gritted teeth.
“Here’s a lesson, Rosie,” Dayton says, his wolf’s smile strangely similar to the man’s. “The best way to get Keldarion to do something you want is to do it wrong. He’ll be sure to correct you.”
Keldarion stands in the middle of the nest—a giant creation of fluffy blankets and plush pillows—and turns in a circle, then turns the other way. Then he plops down. “If I’m going to sleep here, it might as well be comfortable.”
Rosalina gives the softest smile and somehow, she’s shining brighter than before.
Dayton gets into the nest beside Kel. “Big strong protector has to watch out for us?”
Kel cracks an eye open. “Yes.”
Dayton laughs, and I notice his fur isn’t damp anymore. In fact, I don’t even see the usual strands of rotten seaweed that wind through his fur.
Rosalina dives into the middle of the nest. She’d ran into her bedroom and changed into a light pink nightdress.
Warmth spreads through me. Short-sleeves.
Dayton crawls beside her and tugs the blankets over her body with his mouth. I sit awkwardly to the side, watching them. Keldarion’s curled in a tight ball, but Dayton lays his snout on the white wolf’s haunches. Rosalina curls between them, nearly engulfed in white and gold fur.
I walk quickly toward my bedroom, alone.
“Ez?” Rosalina calls. “Are you coming?”
An uneasy beat passes in my chest. You deserve to be alone , Kairyn whispers in my head.
“Hurry up,” Dayton says sleepily. “You’re the last one in so you’re the foot warmer.”
I squeeze my eyes closed. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up, I say to the voice in my head. This is my family.
Each step feels cautious as I approach the plush nest and step a foot in. Slowly, I lay the front of my body over Rosalina’s legs. Her eyes are closed, but she smiles and reaches down, scratching between my ears.
It feels… nice.
“Goodnight, everyone,” Rosalina whispers sleepily. “Goodnight, Farron.”
As I drift into oblivion, I hope he knows we’re right outside. His family, waiting for him to return to us.
I wake before dawn. I’m so… warm. I know I must return to my own chamber before the sun rises, so I’ll transform in private and have access to my helmet. But I don’t want to get up.
Forcing myself up to my feet, I look at the strange nest we created last night. Dayton’s sleeping on his back, all four paws in the air, and a huge glob of drool running out of his mouth. Rosalina is right. He does look like a golden retriever.
And Kel…
Kel is a man, his naked form wrapped in Rosalina’s arms. They’re fast asleep, but Kel’s face is soft, reminding me of my friend from years past. A boy who had no knowledge of the trials of manhood.
He may not have accepted the mate bond yet, but there is still magic here. Proof the Enchantress’s curse can be broken.
Proof that Rosalina’s touch is magic.
I press my ear to the door, and thankfully only hear rhythmic breathing. Hopefully, Farron found rest, despite the chains of curse and thorn.
I creep from the nest to my room, careful not to wake anyone. I take one look back at Kel in Rosalina’s arms and a pang of sorrow tightens in my chest.
You deserve to let yourself be loved by her, Kel , I think.
I only wish I could be so lucky.