60. Farron
60
Farron
P urple liquid spouts from the fountain like an amethyst waterfall. My head is fuzzy, and staring into the shimmering cascade is easier than trying to take in the party. I have partaken in little drink, but the din of music and chatter, the bright lights shining in the darkness, and the ever-present press of the crowd makes my mind feel muddled.
One more drink and we can leave . I fill the obsidian goblet from the fountain. Even though I haven’t talked to anyone outside of my group, this has been enough socializing for a long time. I yearn for my bed, a quiet room, and stillness.
I turn away when someone slams a hand down on the stone counter, stopping my departure.
Caspian.
He stares at me with an enigmatic smirk, dark eyes twinkling mischievously, dark hair garlanded by a crown of black roses. “Well, well, we finally have an opportunity to talk. I haven’t been able to get a moment alone with you all night.”
“What do you want, Caspian?” I try to push past him, but he stands in my way. He’s right—I haven’t left Dayton’s side since we’ve arrived. Usually, a revel with this much debauchery would have him with a different fae on his lap all night. But he was in a terrible mood. Nothing cheered him up. Not dancing, not kissing. We didn’t even fuck. Day barely drank at all; his emotions ranged from anxious to sour.
It’s my fault. We’re here because of me. Because of this bargain. He hasn’t said it, but I wonder if he thinks I’m a coward for this, for not being brave enough to find another way.
“What do I want?” Caspian puts a mock offended hand on his heart. “Farron, you wound me. You and I share a bond.”
“One I will be glad to rid myself of,” I grumble and make to pass him.
Again, he moves in front of me, blocking my path. “I only wanted to thank you for attending my party. I wasn’t sure you would all show up.”
“We had to show up. It’s part of the bargain.” The thorn collar around my neck seems to tighten at the thought. I resist the urge to scratch it.
Caspian looks down at a small notebook he’s carrying. “Come now, Farron. It wasn’t only about the bargain, was it?”
“Trust me. It was.” I peer through the crowd to the willow tree in the courtyard’s corner. Rosalina sits surrounded by the other princes, and an intense longing to be near her throbs in my heart.
Caspian follows my gaze. “This is how it is for men like us. The watchers and the waiters. The poets and the philosophers. Always on the outside looking in.”
They’re laughing, all four of them. I’m not an outsider; I belong there with them.
“They are men who take what they want,” Caspian says. “But you and I hide in the shadows. Never truly part of the living. So often betrayed by our very bodies.”
“I’m nothing like you,” I say. Slamming the goblet on the counter, I reach up and pry my fingers under the thorn collar. Barbs dig into my hands, and a warm trickle of blood drips down my neck.
Caspian runs a finger through the blood. “I’ve protected you each night, Farron. Do you feel me when my thorns cradle you in the dark?”
“No…”
“How about when your control slips?”
My breath hitches. He couldn’t know about earlier today and yet… I’m there again, in the best moment of my life. Until I felt my beast clawing at me from the inside out, and all I could think was I’m going to kill her. And it was him who stopped it all.
“What would have happened if it wasn’t for our little bargain?” He pops his finger into his mouth, sucking deeply. Then he opens to a wicked smile, teeth painted red. “Would you have devoured her or… devoured her?”
“Shut up.” My voice is raspy and raw. How could he know about Rosalina and I in the tavern? There was only the two of us.
And the beast and briars.
“But I know your secret,” Caspian continues. “There’s a part of you that craves to let the beast win. You know it, don’t you, Farron? You’ll never be truly free until you do.”
My eyes widen, and panic laces through me. “That’s not—”
“In many ways, we are one and the same. Monsters within our family.”
My heart hammers in my chest, and I rip my hands away from the collar. “You’re nothing like me, Caspian. Even back before the War of Thorns, you were never truly one of us. We all sensed it, all except Kel. It’s like there’s a doom on you, something vile and condemned. I don’t know what game you’re playing with us now, showing up at our home, making us come to your stupid party.” My voice is ragged, breath too fast. “You’re not part of our family, Caspian. You never were. And you never will be.”
Caspian steps back, eyes wide and shimmering.
Sometimes when I look at him, I forget just how wicked he is. But he nearly destroyed Kel. He’s bringing ruin to Castletree. Plus, he’s tormenting Rosalina.
I am the High Prince of Autumn, and the Below is an enemy to the realm. Caspian is an enemy. If I can’t stand up for those I love, I’ll never be able to defend all of Autumn.
I snatch Caspian by the lapel and shove him against the stone counter. “And stop speaking in Rosalina’s mind. Whatever dark sorcery you’ve conjured, leave her out of it.”
His eyes flick down to the notebook he’s holding. I recognize it now, one of the blank pads we use during our research. Rosalina’s handwriting is scrawled over the front—
I snatch the book from him, and he cries out, reaching for it. And with all the anger built in me, I rip the pad in two and throw it to the ground.
Caspian lets out a strangled sound and falls to his knees, gathering the shredded pieces. Then he glowers up at me. “You were all so quick to bestow me with the role of villain. Well then, Farron dear, if it is between that and outcast, I accept. I’ll play the part to perfection, and you’ll rue the day you ever cast me in it.”
The thorns around my neck shiver and all goes black.