Chapter 18 Wraith #2
Shadow nods. “Would you excuse us for a few minutes, Paxon?”
I nod and Paxon gets to his feet.
“There’s a bench right outside this room by the window. Wait for me there.”
“Okay.” He squeezes my hand then leaves the office, while I brace for impact. It’s very possible Shadow is about to lose his shit on me.
“Well, this is interesting,” he says once we’re alone.
“I’m sorry, Shadow. You know I wouldn’t disobey my orders ordinarily, but this has me fucked up.
I admit I let it go longer than I should have.
I was distracted by Pax, and the target is actually pretty good at eluding me.
Then it all came to light, and once I heard the story, I believed it.
I met the target—Boone, they call him—and he’s sincere.
In way over his fucking head, but his intentions were good. ”
“I’ve failed us, Wraith. I should’ve been vetting clients better. I let the money get to me and ignored my own warning bells.”
“What do you mean?”
“This client gave me the creeps. There was something off about him. I sensed it, but he offered us a shit ton of money. Much more than we’d normally get for a job like this. That should’ve been another red flag for me. He was desperate. Now I know why.”
“He has a lot to hide.”
Shadow flips the folder open again. “According to this, they operate over at the docks on the West Side. That means they might be working with Joey Biggs.”
“Right. Joey isn’t a bad guy, right?”
“Not in the past. Minds his business, but he has to know there are people coming through there as cargo. Maybe he’s been blinded by the money too.”
“Maybe, yeah.”
He rubs his chin. “You can’t do this alone. It’s too big now. It’s gonna take all of us.”
I nod. “Yes.”
“Okay.” He blows out a breath through his nose. “You focus on getting the target to safety. I’ll get the guys started looking for the client, and I’ll go see Joey Biggs.”
Everything inside me settles. “Thank you.”
He nods. “No, I owe you the thanks. It took balls to do this, but I’m grateful. I guess I needed the reality check.”
“Maybe we all did.”
Shadow studies me for a moment, and I know from his expression that he has more to say.
“You’re in love with him, yes?”
“What? Who?”
“Who? Paxon Bouchard.”
“Oh. No. It’s not like that. It was just a casual thing. He’s not out, and now he knows I’m a…” I clear my throat. “Our lives don’t align.”
“You sure about that? Maybe you haven’t noticed how he looks at you.”
“It doesn’t matter, Shadow. He could never be okay with how I live my life. After this is all over, we’ll go our separate ways, and it’ll be fine. It has to be fine.”
Shadow’s brow creases as he says, “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“Creating you.” He gestures around the office. “This.”
“No. Don’t ever say that again. You’ve given me more than I ever hoped for, and I’m happy. I’m fulfilled. When the time is right, I’ll find someone who can love me for everything I am. And if not, that’s okay too. I’ve got my family.”
Shadow’s eyes cloud over with rare emotion. “I’m worried that I’m not seeing enough. First what happened with Stealth, and now this. What else am I missing?”
“Nothing, boss. Those are two different situations. We’ve got your back too. We’ll help you see stuff.”
He nods, but I can tell he’s not convinced.
“Is Stealth doing okay?” I ask.
“He is. He thinks he’s ready to get back into the mix solo, and I think I’m going to let him.”
“If we move on this, then he’ll at least be surrounded by all of us and you can see him in action.”
“Good point.” He straightens his shoulders. “I’ll call a meeting for the morning and we’ll start making plans. In the meantime, keep me posted on any updates.”
“Of course.”
I leave his office and find Paxon standing in front of the window, looking out over the garden. Night has fallen, but the garden is lit up with small lanterns that add a magical quality, especially in the winter.
“Hey.”
He turns quickly. “Are you okay?”
“Yes. He’s given me permission and he’s going to help. He’ll call a meeting in the morning and we’ll figure out how to take out this ring and find Boone.”
His body slumps slightly with obvious relief. “Really?”
“Really.” I walk closer, reaching for his hand and smiling when he lets me take it. “You changed us, Pax. You and Boone. We got off course and haven’t vetted our potential clients as well as we should. We’re going to start now.”
His eyes soften as he smiles. “That’s good.”
“Listen, when this is all said and done, I’m still gonna be a guy who kills people for a living. That isn’t changing. What is changing is what kinds of jobs we take on.”
“I know.”
“And I know it sucks. I would never ask you to look past it or push aside your own morals for me, but I need you to know something.”
He nods, holding my gaze.
“Knowing you has been amazing. I didn’t think I’d…” Fuck. My words fade away as the thoughts I’ve been ignoring push their way to the forefront, tightening the back of my throat. “That I’d care so much. I care.”
“I care too, Wraith. More than I want to.”
We stand in silence, simply gazing at each other. I want to pull him into my arms, make him melt, drain all his tension away.
“Can I see your bedroom?” Pax asks.
Fuck yes. “Of course.”
I lead him up the stairs and down the hallway to my room, stepping back as he enters.
My space is simple but comfortable. I’ve got a few antiques I managed to keep from my family, and the rest of it is just stuff I’ve acquired over the years.
My bed though, that’s my favorite thing. It’s big, comfortable, and luxurious.
Pax walks right over to it, running his hand across the duvet. “This looks nice.”
“A restful sleep is important.”
“It is.” He turns to me. “This isn’t what I expected.”
“What did you expect?”
“I thought it would be more modern and minimal. Like my place.”
“Nah. I’m a creature of comfort at heart.”
Pax nods, glancing around the room. “We should probably keep looking for Boone.”
“We should, yes. I can check in with Whisper again. See if he’s picked up any movement.”
Pax chews on his bottom lip for a second before taking a step closer to me. “Maybe, um, since our last time was… what it was… we could fix it.”
“Fix it?”
“That’s not what I want our last interaction to be. Maybe you didn’t hate it, but that’s not who we are. Not really.”
This is unexpected. “Are you saying you want me to fuck you the way you need it?”
His gaze heats as he nods. “Fuck, yes. Make it all stop for a little while like only you can.”
“I’d love to.”
As I step closer, Pax pulls his head back a little. “But then that’s it. We can’t keep…” He exhales slowly. “It won’t work.”
“I know.”
“But if things were different, if the circumstances weren’t so fucked up, I’d try for you.”
My heart clenches in my chest as I fight back unexpected emotions. “I’d try for you too.”
His features soften as he pulls me into his arms. “Then kiss me, Wraith. Kiss me with everything you’ve got.”
Because it’s the last time. And we both know it.