Chapter 16
Ashmedai
Your brother is my brother. Ashmedai dwelled on the promise he’d made all night while Nicolas slumbered in his arms. He snuck away just before dawn, redressing and pressing one final kiss to Nicolas’s lax lips before he disappeared.
One day he would be able to stay and see what Nicolas looked like when he first woke up, but that wasn’t yet upon them.
Your brother is my brother. He’d never had a brother.
Never had any kind of family, really. He didn’t interact with the other sin eaters.
They existed only to hunt. If he was going to claim a brother, his human’s brother, perhaps he should start by offering his friendship.
He didn’t have to look out for Daniel only in the event of Nicolas’s death.
He could look out for him now, too. That would make Nicolas happy, wouldn’t it?
He appeared in the dark storage closet of the Rink. It had become his entry point for the building, since it was always dark, and they left the door shut.
The room was brightly lit—always brightly lit—but Daniel was the only one there, standing behind the snack bar while a machine gurgled before him. Weights were strewn haphazardly beneath the twinkling disco ball, and the air hockey table was littered with papers and a lone, closed laptop.
Daniel turned, stirring a cup of coffee, and startled, sloshing coffee over his fingers and hissing in pain.
“Jesus! You scared me!” He laughed, setting the disposable cup down and grabbing a towel to mop up the coffee.
“What’s up? The others all went home just a little while ago.
Bunch of night owls, all of them. I don’t see how they do it.
I had to call it a night around midnight, and I still woke up in time to see them all off.
Can I get you anything? Can you drink coffee? Or just sins?”
Ashmedai tilted his head. “Just sins.”
“Okay. What’s up, then? Did you see Nic? Is he okay?” He rounded the snack bar with his cup, taking a slurping sip.
“I did. He’s fine. Where are your things?”
“My things? In the medical room. Why are—Ashmedai?”
Ashmedai headed into the dark medical room. Daniel’s two duffel bags were in the corner, beside the cot on the far right. The top one was open, so he stuffed everything inside and zipped it up, then grabbed both and disappeared to the apartment.
He dropped them both on the sofa and returned to the Rink’s medical room just seconds before Daniel flipped on the light. He flinched, and Daniel turned the light back off, leaving only a streak of light from the main room to illuminate them.
“What are you doing? Where’d you take my stuff?” he asked.
“Is there more? Missing anything?”
“Am I missing anything?” His honey-gold eyes widened. “Yeah, all the stuff you just took! Where’d you go?”
Ashmedai rolled his eyes. Snagging Daniel’s wrist, he tugged him into the darkness and disappeared, ignoring Daniel’s holler of surprise as he hurtled through the shadows after him.
When they landed in the living room, Daniel staggered, his free arm pinwheeling.
Luckily, he seemed to have set his coffee down somewhere before following Ashmedai to the med room.
“Oh my God, please don’t ever do that again. I think I’m gonna be sick.” He doubled over, one arm around his stomach and the other clutching his head.
Ashmedai rolled his eyes.
Daniel straightened. “Where are we—why are we here? Why’d you bring me here?”
“Live here.”
Daniel’s hands flailed. “I know you live here!”
Ashmedai cut a hand through the air. “No! You should live here.”
Daniel balked, taking in the apartment again. “Wait, what? But you live here.”
“I don’t sleep. Don’t eat. Don’t need this space. I come here to wait until night. That’s all. You, you could use it. The bed. The space.” Humans did things in bathrooms and kitchens that Ashmedai never would. Daniel would get much more use out of this place.
Daniel softened. “Did… Did Nic say something? Is that why you’re doing this? You don’t have to do all of this for me. I was fine at the Rink. I can find my own place.”
Ashmedai debated how much to tell him. He probably wouldn’t like that Nicolas was making contingencies for his own death any more than Ashmedai did. Telling him about the promise would just worry him.
“‘Your brother is my brother.’ Told him that.”
Daniel’s eyes widened. “You did?”
“I don’t have a family. But family takes care of each other. Right?” Nicolas took care of Daniel, certainly.
“Right,” he breathed.
Ashmedai gestured at the living room around them.
Daniel shuffled in place, pushing his fingers through his short curls and looking around the room. “Well—okay, but what about your stuff? You have clothes and stuff, right?”
“Yes.” He hadn’t thought about that. They probably wouldn’t mind if he stored the box at the Rink.
“Keep it here,” Daniel said. “We’ll be like roommates.”
“Roommates?”
“Yeah. People who share a living space. I’ll use the bed and kitchen and everything, but you can store your things here and come here during the day while you wait for nightfall. We’ll share it. How about that?”
That seemed reasonable. “Yes.”
Daniel beamed at him. “Great. Guess I can finally unpack all my clothes from those bags.” He moved to the bags and unzipped the first one. “So, uh, how is Nic doing?”
Ashmedai considered his answer. “Lonely. He looks forward to being done with this.”
“Me, too,” Daniel remarked. “I’m used to seeing him every day. It’s nice to be able to hang out with Julian again, but it’s not the same without Nic with us.”
Ashmedai longed to hear more. “He told me about before. When you were in a squad together.”
Daniel smiled weakly. “Yeah, it was great. Nicolas was young for a captain. He excelled as a paladin, climbed through the ranks in no time and got his pick of my graduating class. He wanted Julian and me. I’m really glad Julian got out when he did and joined the Sentinels, and I’m glad to be with them now, too.
I just hope Nic is able to get out of there soon.
I hate that he’s doing this alone.” He sighed, shoulders slumping, and sat down on the sofa.
Looking at Ashmedai imploringly, he asked, “Should I have stayed? I feel like I abandoned him there. Maybe I shouldn’t have let him talk me into leaving without him. ”
Ashmedai lowered his head, considering. “He worries for you.”
“He always has.”
“Your presence there would have distracted him.”
Daniel blew out a breath. “You’re probably right.”
“Trust him. He has a plan.”
Daniel smiled at him, propping his head up on his fist. “You really like him, huh?”
“Like, no. Too mild of a word.”
Dark brows rose questioningly. “Love him?”
He didn’t know anything about love. What it felt like, what it looked like, how to identify it.
“What is love?” He desperately wanted it to be true, but he didn’t know enough about it to say for certain.
“Love is… hell, I don’t know. I’ve never been in love, either.
” Daniel snorted, shoving his fingers under his curls to scratch at his scalp.
“I think loving somebody means accepting the good and the bad. You’ll do anything for them.
You miss them when you’re not with them.
You want them to be happy.” His lips pursed thoughtfully.
“There’s probably more to it than that.”
Ashmedai thought about only seeing Nicolas at night. How he harbored an ache in his chest during the day when he was forced to stay away. How he longed to see Nicolas smile. Their plans for the future and quiet moments of contentment. How Nicolas’s anguish made him want to tear his own heart out.
“Love him,” Ashmedai said softly. “Yes, I love him.”
A slow smile bloomed on Daniel’s face. “Well. Welcome to the family, Ashmedai. You’re not what I expected in a brother-in-law, but I’m glad it’s you.”
A warm feeling flooded his body. Was this what family felt like? Ashmedai could get used to it.