Chapter September 18, 2018—Palawan, Philippines—A Month Later #5
“Back in the river…” Logan’s words faltered, but his fingers didn’t.
They slid into Adrian’s hair, threading through the strands with quiet desperation, tugging gently, grounding himself in the sensation.
“That was the first time I—” His voice caught, and Adrian felt the tremor in his hand.
“This was the first time you didn’t stop us since our first time.
” Logan finally let it out. Over the course of the months they had shared, Adrian had been the one to voice what lingered in the spaces between them.
His easy-going nature, the way he wore his heart on his sleeve like a badge of courage, made him bold.
It wasn’t that Logan didn’t feel, far from it.
His emotions were a deep current, swirling beneath the surface, hidden and powerful.
But he struggled to bring them to light, to shape them into words that matched the intensity of what was in his chest. Adrian had spent time navigating his own depths, finding clarity and calm like someone who had learned to read the rhythm of the sea.
Logan, meanwhile, held his emotions like a tightly wound knot, uncertain how to untangle them.
Still, he wanted to say it. God knew he’d felt it rising inside him for weeks now, unspoken and raw. “I want you to lose control, Ad.”
Adrian’s breath hitched, his brow furrowing as he searched Logan’s face.
There was something raw in Logan’s eyes, a vulnerability that cut through him.
“Lose control?” he repeated, the words foreign and heavy on his tongue.
He needed Logan to clarify because that was not something he could do with half words and half statements. He needed Logan’s clear instructions.
Logan nodded, his fingers tightening in Adrian’s hair, just enough to send a shiver down his spine. “When we’re together,” he began, his voice low but steady, “I can feel you holding back. The way you kiss me, the way you stop when things get too heated. Like you’re afraid.”
The dim glow of the lamp caught the blush that crept across Adrian’s cheeks, turning his skin the color of a setting sun.
He looked away for a moment, his lips parting as if to speak, but no words came.
Finally, he said, “I just… I wanted to give you time. I know this is new for you, I know you’ve never been with a man, and I didn’t want to push. ”
“I know,” Logan said, his tone softening. “And I needed that time. I needed it to move slowly at first.” His other hand moved to rest against Adrian’s chest, right over his heart, feeling its frantic rhythm. “But now, I need you to stop holding back. I need you to let go.”
The words were a ripple that became a wave, crashing over Adrian with an intensity that left him breathless.
He stared at Logan, the space between them charged, electric.
Slowly, he cupped Logan’s face, his thumb brushing over his cheekbone.
The kiss he gave him this time was different—not gentle, not hesitant, but deep and consuming.
“Are you sure?” His eyes searched Logan’s, needing the answer, needing certainty.
“Yes,” Logan said, and when he smiled, it was like sunlight breaking through the dense canopy above, a light that banished every shadow.
Adrian nodded but hesitated for a moment. “I need to say something,” he murmured, breaking the silence. His voice was steady, but his fingers twitched slightly where they rested on Logan’s hip.
“Oh no,” Logan teased lightly, though his voice was soft. “That sounds serious.”
Adrian huffed a quiet laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s not—it’s just…” He sighed, shaking his head at himself. “I need an unsexy moment before we… before this.”
Logan propped himself up on one elbow, watching Adrian with a lazy, lopsided smile. “An unsexy moment?” he repeated. “Okay.” Logan’s voice was all mock seriousness.
Adrian groaned, pressing his palm over his face, his laughter muffled. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t,” Logan said smugly, lying back down, one arm draped over Adrian. “Go on. Let’s get this unsexy moment over with, so we can move on to the sexy part of the night.”
Adrian sighed but smiled despite himself.
“It’s been a while for me,” he admitted.
“Like… a… you know…. A long while. Before this trip, I got checked, you know, since I had to get a bunch of shots anyway, so… I guess they have checked other stuff too… and I just—I wanted you to know that.” He exhaled, his fingers toying with the hem of his shirt.
“And I wanted to ask if… if you’re comfortable… ”
Logan’s laughter came, and he squished Adrian’s arm warmly.
“What?” Adrian asked, brows furrowing.
“You,” Logan said, his voice full of something fond, something devastatingly gentle. “The way you get all flustered over something so simple.”
Adrian groaned again, covering his face with his hand, but Logan reached out and caught his wrist, pulling his hand away. Their eyes met, and suddenly, all of Adrian’s self-consciousness dissolved into the background, overshadowed by the quiet intensity in Logan’s gaze.
“For the record,” Logan said, thumb brushing against Adrian’s wrist, tracing slow circles against his skin, “same for me. I’m all checked out, and it’s been a while.” His voice carried the faintest hint of embarrassment, but his eyes never wavered. “Almost a year.”
Something in Adrian’s chest softened, uncoiling like a knot undone. He swallowed, nodding, before clearing his throat. “So…”
Logan smirked. “So…?”
Adrian narrowed his eyes at him. “We could…” he trailed off.
Logan grinned, all playful mischief. “We could what?” he prompted, knowing full well what Adrian meant.
Adrian groaned, but he was smiling. “Logan,” he warned, voice full of mock exasperation.
Logan tilted his head, looking at him with that insufferable, infuriatingly charming glint in his eye. “I just wanna be sure I understand,” he said, the picture of innocence, as he softly kissed Adrian’s knuckles.
Adrian let out a breathless laugh, shaking his head. “You’re impossible.”
Logan’s smile softened, the teasing melting into something quieter as he threaded their fingers together, his grip warm, steady. He lifted their joined hands and pressed a kiss to Adrian’s knuckles again, lingering.
“You’re beautiful,” he murmured, so quietly Adrian barely heard it over the distant sound of the forest.
Adrian’s breath caught, his pulse stuttering. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to take a compliment like that without deflecting.
Logan’s lips hovered over Adrian’s knuckles, his breath warm against his skin, and Adrian felt something in him settle. Not the wild thrill of desire, not the pulse of anticipation, but something deeper, something that felt like belonging.
Because somehow, despite the universe’s chaos, despite the relentless shifting of tides and time, he had found himself here.
Adrian Leon—who had spent most of his life feeling like an outsider looking in, who had learned early how to want without expecting—had ended up with Logan Vaughn.
This untamed, sun-kissed force of nature, this storm in human form, all laughter and saltwater and fire, had chosen him.
And not just in a fleeting way, not just in the way people chase a thrill or a beautiful sunset.
Logan was here. Staying. Holding Adrian’s hand like a quiet promise, looking at him like he was something worth getting lost in.
Adrian swallowed, exhaling slowly, letting the weight of it settle inside him before he found the courage to say it. “So we can go bare.”
His own voice sounded distant, hushed, yet resolute.
He half-expected Logan to tease him once more, to prolong this precious moment with that effortless, infuriating grin, one Adrian pretended to find exhausting but secretly adored and longed for.
Yet, when Adrian finally met his gaze, Logan’s expression transformed into something entirely different, softening in a way that took Adrian by surprise.
A quiet kind of awe.
“Yeah,” Logan murmured, nodding, his grip on Adrian’s hand tightening just slightly.
No hesitation. No doubt. Just trust. Just them.
Adrian exhaled, a slow, trembling breath, as Logan leaned in, closing the last of the space between them.
Their lips met in a kiss that felt like Adrian’s deepest desire.
Logan kissed him like he wanted to leave his name etched into Adrian’s skin, like he wanted to drown in him, like this wasn’t just tonight, wasn’t just a moment, but something that had already begun to rewrite the landscape of his life.
Adrian groaned softly, and in a heartbeat, he was on Logan again.
His lips found Logan’s, pouring all the words he didn’t know how to say into the kiss.
Their tongues tangled, their breaths mingling as the jungle outside pulsed with life.
If Logan wanted Adrian to lose control, he was ready to surrender to the storm and take Logan with him.
Logan arched against Adrian, their bodies fitting together as if they’d been carved from the same wave.
His soft moans were filling the space between them as Adrian’s hands roamed his waist, fingers tugging at the fabric of his shirt.
They broke apart for a moment, long enough for Adrian to pull Logan’s shirt free and toss it aside.
Logan, eager and trembling, returned the favor, ridding Adrian of his own.
Adrian dove back in, his mouth tracing a path down Logan’s neck as their bare skin pressed together, heat radiating between them like a flame. The too-small tent shifted and swayed with their movements, and Logan let out a breathless laugh.
“You better not knock this tent over,” he warned, his voice teasing but laced with desire. “I am not ending up naked on the ground.”
Adrian couldn’t help but laugh, the sound bubbling up even as his lips found Logan’s again. “Being reckless? That’s all you. I’m too practical for that.”