20. Sally
CHAPTER 20
Sally
A CROWDED TABLE
“Aw, hell yeah. My brother finally grew a pair and asked you out.” Sawyer holds out his arms, a gigantic smile on his face as he walks into the kitchen for lunch later that day. “Welcome to the family, Sal.”
Wyatt finishes the last bite of his collards and shakes his head. “One, only I call her that. And two, she’s always been part of our family.”
“You can call me whatever you want, Sawyer.” I rise from my spot at the table beside Wyatt and wrap his brother in a hug. “And thank you. We’re thrilled. How’d you find out?—”
“Oh, your mama’s just a wee bit excited.” Sawyer nods at Mom. “She might have shared the news earlier without necessarily meaning to.”
She just shrugs from her perch by the stove. “How could I not be excited? Two of my favorite people are finding happiness together. It’s a dream, isn’t it?”
“Mom—”
“It is a dream, yeah.” Wyatt looks at me and smiles.
I can’t believe he’s not more freaked out by Mom’s big mouth and Sawyer’s insinuation that I’d actually, legally become part of the Rivers family. That’s a big step. A huge one.
But I really can believe it . I keep coming back to the idea that, yes, Wyatt really isn’t scared of commitment. He wants to fall in love.
He wants what his parents had. The loving relationship. The trust. The respect.
And, yeah, one day, the ranch and the house and the kids. He’s never said it out loud. But I know he’d thrive in that kind of life if he ever let himself have it.
As an only child, I loved going over to the Rivers’ house. Sure, it was often chaotic and always loud. But it was always fun too. They all seemed so connected to each other. All seven of them sat down for dinner every night and for breakfast every morning, and they had all these cool traditions they shared. Mrs. Rivers would let the boys help her make homemade cinnamon rolls every Saturday. Mr. Rivers would take us on “adventures” in his ATV in the afternoons when it was too hot to be on horseback.
They’d have huge Christmas dinners and epic Easter brunches. Pumpkin-carving parties, cookie-decorating parties. Dance parties in their living room when it rained.
I loved being a part of it. It made my home life seem quiet and tame in comparison. I also think it made me want a bunch of kids of my own.
But then I grew up, and I became aware of the reality of raising a large family. It would be expensive. And stressful. I’d have to sacrifice my freedom. Forget travel. And I don’t know how I’d manage a family like that while working the super-intense jobs I’ve always been after.
Even so, when I’m sitting down to a meal surrounded by the Rivers family, like I am now, I feel a tug. A longing for a table like this, filled with family like this. Only it’s my own family I’m eating with. I’m in my own house, where my husband and I enjoy our own traditions .
Glancing at Wyatt, I can’t help but think of all the fun traditions we already have. Our rides. Our drives. Our Jack Daniel’s by the river. And the coffee we had on Wyatt’s front porch—that could become a tradition too.
I’ve never wanted to get a tattoo before, but now I’m thinking about it.
I’ve been thinking about it a lot.
I’m filled with this bright, joyful sense of gratitude when I think about all the things we could add to our list of traditions. The wholesome things, and the not-so-wholesome things too.
So much ground to cover.
“My only question is, what took y’all so long?” Ryder is returning to the table after grabbing a second pulled pork sandwich from the platter on the island.
Wyatt reaches for my thigh underneath the table. My heart skips a beat when he squeezes, a flare of heat igniting between my legs. “Good question.”
I wonder when my face is going to stop hurting from all this damn smiling.
“So? Tell us.” Duke takes a huge bite of his sandwich.
Wyatt and I were at breakfast so early that we left the house before anyone else was up. He and I got some steers caught up on their vaccinations, and then we tacked up our horses to go check out a pasture that had flooded yesterday.
It was just him and me all morning, and it was heaven.
By the time Mom radioed in that lunch was ready, we’d been out riding for hours and not seen a soul.
But word travels fast in a small town. I want to be annoyed that Mom told everyone about Wyatt and me. Honestly, though, I’m kinda glad she did. It’s nice knowing at least one of my parents is excited for us.
Dad disappeared after breakfast, and I haven’t seen him since. I understand why he’s not crazy about Wyatt and me dating, but really, he doesn’t have to be such a curmudgeon about it. I know he’s worried Wyatt’s going to keep me in Hartsville. But that’s not Dad’s choice to make.
This is my life. And I’m learning that the more I take the wheel—the more I block out the noise of everyone else’s opinions and do what feels right for me—the more I feel at peace.
Does Dad’s disapproval rattle me? Of course it does. Do I still have conflicting feelings about my future? Yes. But behind all that—or maybe beneath it—is this warm, solid sense of oh, thank God.
Thank God I took a chance and let Wyatt in.
Thank God I did that, despite what everyone else thinks.
Thank God I chose myself—and keep choosing myself.
“Most of the story”—Wyatt looks at me, his hand still on my leg—“ain’t appropriate for polite company.”
Sawyer grins. “Good thing we’re not polite.”
“I think we just realized we were done wasting time.” I can’t look away from Wyatt. “We’re not getting any younger. And, yeah, I decided I need to have more fun, and I never have more fun than I do with your brother.”
Duke raises his eyebrows. “So that’s what y’all call it. Fun.”
“Say another word, and I’ll pop you in the mouth,” Wyatt replies, his eyes still glued to mine. “Sorry they’re heathens.”
“I’m not sorry,” Ryder replies.
“Uncle Wy! Hello! Look, look, Ella made bunny ears!”
We all look up at the happy little shout that sounds by the door. Ella bursts into the kitchen. She’s wearing a paper circlet on her head that’s topped with tall pink-and-white bunny ears.
Wyatt immediately lifts her onto his lap, laughing. “Aren’t we closer to Christmas than Easter?”
“Her class is reading a book about a bunny that likes to listen and follow directions,” Sawyer explains. “Because we like to listen and follow directions, too, right, Ella? ”
She just smiles, curling up in Wyatt’s lap. He plucks the ears off her head and puts them on his own head.
“How do I look?” he asks her.
“Cute,” I say, suddenly short of breath.
“A cute doggone idiot,” a voice says.
Glancing over my shoulder, I see Cash step into the kitchen behind Mollie. I’ve been around the ranch long enough to know that they must’ve just come from picking up Ella from school. It’s their way of giving Sawyer a little break during the week. Mollie fell head over heels in love with Ella, so she asked Sawyer if she could get more involved by doing school pickup once or twice a week.
My stomach dips. On our ride this morning, Wyatt told me about Cash confronting him many times about the way Wyatt looked at me in the past. I guess Cash is worried that if things end badly between Wyatt and me, my parents will want nothing to do with Lucky River Ranch.
Again, I understand why Cash is concerned. But I wish people would trust us. Our decision to be together might seem impulsive, but in many ways, this relationship has been years in the making. We waited until the timing was right to make our move. We’re not stupid kids anymore; I’d like to think we know what we’re doing.
Then again, is the timing right, or is it worse than ever? We each have so much at stake now. My career. Wyatt’s family and his plans for the ranch.
Cash’s gaze immediately darts to Wyatt and me. He frowns when he looks down and sees our legs touching on the picnic bench beneath the table.
We don’t need to sit this close. We never have before.
It’s a subtle clue, but it’s a clue nonetheless.
“What’s goin’ on here?” Cash’s voice is little more than a growl.
Wyatt cuts me a glance before handing Ella to Sawyer. “You got a second, Cash? ”
I meet eyes with Mollie. I feel a rush of relief when she offers me a small, knowing smile. I haven’t told her yet about the recent developments between Wyatt and me, but I was planning to after we chatted with my parents.
Maybe things will actually work out. Of course this news is going to rock the ranch’s boat. We’re our own little close-knit community here, and change is always difficult, even when it’s good change.
“Outside.” Cash tilts his head back toward the door. “Y’all finish your lunch.”
“I don’t need to get out my spoon, do I?” Mom warns. “Y’all are gonna behave. You know my rule about fights.”
“They’ll behave,” Mollie says easily, patting Cash’s chest. “I have a feeling it’s happy news.”
Wyatt rises, his brow furrowing when I rise too.
“It’s our news,” I say. “We share it together.”
Cash groans. “I love you, Sally, but?—”
“Whatever you say to him, you can say to me too.”
Wyatt’s expression softens with gratitude. He grabs my hand. Thank you.
I smile. You’re welcome.
Wyatt helps me into my jacket. I wait for him to take off the bunny ears and put on his hat, but he doesn’t.
“Even Cash can’t be mean to a bunny,” he explains with a smile.
We follow Cash out into the autumn sunshine. It’s a bright, beautiful day, the air crisp, not a cloud in the sky.
It’s a startling contrast to Cash’s stormy expression.
“How long?” he asks.
Wyatt grabs my hand. “How long have we been dating or?—”
“How long have y’all been sneaking around behind our backs?”
I give him a look. “That’s unfair, Cash. We only started telling people today. And we’re telling y’all because we don’t want to go behind anyone’s back.”
“If you say so.” Glaring at me, Cash runs his tongue along the inside of his cheek before he turns to his brother. “And this is different from all your other flings because…”
Talk about awkward. Cash is putting Wyatt on the spot by making him confess his feelings for me all over again.
“Sally is my best friend. I know my history is working against me here, but people can change. Just look at you and Mollie. Y’all were hell-bent on hating each other in the beginning, but then you talked about your misunderstandings and realized y’all were more alike than different. Isn’t that how it went?”
I nod. “Y’all are so cute together.”
“Thanks,” Cash replies gruffly.
“If you can change, then I can too,” Wyatt continues. “I know you think I’m full of shit, but you have to give me a chance to prove you wrong.”
Cash takes a deep, aggravated inhale. “It’s my job to look after the ranch and everyone who works here. Y’all screw this up, y’all could screw us too.”
“You don’t know that.” My chest tightens. “You said you loved us. Show it. Give us the benefit of the doubt.”
A pained expression crosses Cash’s face. “I want to, Sally. But I also don’t want anybody gettin’ hurt. You understand how this puts me in a bind, don’t you?”
“It only puts you in a bind if you’re assuming the worst will happen,” I counter.
“Again, that’s kind of my job, Sally. Hope for the best, anticipate the worst. And the worst that could happen is pretty damn bad. Y’all break up, Wyatt’s devastated, you’re heartbroken, and your parents decide it’s time to retire because they fuckin’ hate our guts for destroyin’ their daughter. Aren’t you supposed to be moving to New York in, like, a week or something? ”
“End of December,” I say.
“What’s the plan then?”
Wyatt clears his throat. “We’re getting there.”
“And your daddy?” Cash says to me. “What does he think about all this?”
It’s all I can do not to roll my eyes. “He’ll come around.”
Cash gives us a pointed look, as if to say, See? Y’all haven’t grown up.
Wyatt is silent. Cash puts his hands on his hips and looks out across the yard.
Time to bring out the big guns.
“You and Mollie happened fast,” I begin.
Cash kicks at the dirt. “Well, yeah. We had to work together a lot?—”
“And y’all are total opposites.”
“Where are you going with this, Sally?”
“You two fooling around could’ve definitely ended in catastrophe. What if things had ended badly and she fired you as foreman? What if she’d fired all of us because we were friends with you?”
A muscle in Cash’s sharply cut jaw tics. He looks so much like Wyatt in that moment that it makes my heart hiccup. The genes these cowboys share are insane. Will their sons inherit that handsomeness too?
“Admit it, Cash. You risked more than just your heart when you hooked up with Mollie. But it paid off, didn’t it? No one would’ve believed you if you’d said the two of you were going to work out, but y’all did. You knew she was different, and you knew you could be different too. You guys coming together ended up being even better for the ranch and for us than anyone could’ve ever imagined. Extend us the same grace. Please, Cash.”
Cash’s shoulders rise and fall as he heaves out a breath. He looks at Wyatt. Looks at me .
“You and Mollie,” he says to me at last, shaking his head, “are so fuckin’ smart, it’s annoying sometimes.”
Glancing at Wyatt, I can’t help but smile when I take in the bunny ears on his head. He smiles back, and I feel a heady dose of that relief again.
Wyatt squeezes my hand. “You don’t need to give us your blessing. But you do need to give us a chance.”
More silence. A hawk glides low over the house, its shadow cutting across the yard. The warmth of the sun seeps through my jacket. My heart flutters inside my chest, light as air. I’m so happy, I could burst. This is happening. Wyatt and I are dating . Which I guess means he’s my boyfriend now, doesn’t it?
Not only is Wyatt my boyfriend. Everyone knows he’s my boyfriend. And so far, no one’s threatened to murder us yet.
So far, it looks like Cash is actually going to give us a shot to prove him wrong.
I get this floaty feeling inside my chest, like the hawk is soaring through my torso instead of the November sky. I get Wyatt, and I get to enjoy him out in the open.
I feel like I’m getting away with something. This is too easy. Too much of a delight. Didn’t Shakespeare have a lot to say about delights having violent ends?
There is still so much we need to figure out. But it can’t be figured out today, or tomorrow, or even the next day. We have to just…be, I guess, and see what happens.
It’s like jumping off a cliff without a safety net. Totally terrifying.
It’s also the biggest thrill I think I’ve had outside an operating room.
Cash shoves his hands inside his pockets. “Please don’t make me regret trusting y’all.”
Later that afternoon, I help Mom do prep work for tomorrow’s breakfast. We decide to make Mrs. Rivers’s cinnamon rolls—Cash kept the recipe and gave it to Mom—so we throw together some dough that will sit overnight, and chop the peppers and onions that will go in the frittatas that will accompany the rolls.
Mom stretches a sheet of plastic wrap over the dough bowl. “I’m proud of you, you know, for being honest with Wyatt about your feelings. I imagine it wasn’t easy telling your best friend you had the hots for him.”
Grinning, I scoop the peppers into a Pyrex container. “Thanks. I’m proud of me too.”
“You know your father and I are always proud of you. We’re proud of your accomplishments, obviously. But more than that, I’m proud of who you’ve become. You’re a woman with backbone and character and courage. I think it’s spectacular you’re taking risks.”
I blame the onions I just chopped for the sudden burn in my eyes. “I appreciate you saying that. I know Dad isn’t thrilled about this whole thing.”
“But it’s not about Dad, is it? This is about you and what you want to do with your life. It’s okay to disappoint him so long as you’re not letting yourself down.”
Swallowing, I nod. “Easier said than done.”
“Of course. I remember being terrified to tell my daddy I was dating John. Those two did not get along at first.”
I blink. “Really? How did I not know that?”
Mom grins as she opens the fridge and puts the bowl inside. “Because that’s not part of the story your dad likes to tell. Eventually, your grandfather came around to the idea of us being together. But my daddy, he was hell-bent on me getting my education, moving to the big, fancy city. Which, to him, was Amarillo, but that’s neither here nor there. Point being, he didn’t want me throwing away my dreams to become some small-town boy’s wife. ”
“Sounds familiar.”
“Thing is, marrying your dad was one of my dreams. That’s what your grandfather didn’t understand—that being with John didn’t mean giving up on my degree or my dreams for my career.”
I press the plastic cover onto the Pyrex container. “How did you get him to understand that?”
“I showed him. I started my catering business right out of college. I was taking freelance recipe development gigs left and right. I built a great little portfolio for myself. And I did it all while married to your dad. Yeah, it was a far cry from Amarillo. But I was happy. I loved my life—still do—and I think that’s because I let go of my dad’s expectations for me and did what I wanted to do.”
Crossing the kitchen, I wrap Mom in a hug. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“You say I have courage, but I’m not gonna lie to you, Mom. I’m terrified of what Dad would say…” I shake my head. “Never mind.”
“Tell me.”
I glance over my shoulder, making sure the kitchen is still empty. “I’m not feeling great about going back to New York, which I don’t entirely understand. That job represents everything I’ve worked toward. It’s everything I ever wanted. But now…I don’t know. I’m starting to wonder if it’s everything Dad wanted, and I just kind of adopted that dream as my own. I know how much he regrets not going further in his career, but…I just love it so much here, Mom. I can’t imagine leaving Hartsville, and I’m not just saying that because I’m dating Wyatt. Even if he weren’t in the picture, I’m pretty sure I’d feel the same way.”
Mom holds me tighter. “I knew something was up. You haven’t talked about the job much.”
“That’s because talking about it makes my chest hurt.”
“Oh, honey. I’m sorry. Your dad means well, but I understand what you’re saying. Maybe your dreams are different from Dad’s, and maybe they’re coming true a little closer to home than you thought. That’s okay.”
“But turning down the job at Ithaca University makes no sense.”
“It only has to make sense to you.”
Sniffling, I close my eyes. “Thank you for saying that.”
“Be patient.” Mom rubs my shoulder. “And get creative. Hartsville might be a small town, but there’s a lot of knowledge here. A lot of cool things happening. You never know when you might come across an opportunity.”
I nod. “I’ll keep my eyes peeled.”
“Good. I’m gonna hit the bathroom. Then you want to head home? Or are you and Wyatt?—”
“Mom.”
She holds up her hands. “Okay, okay. I won’t ask. One final piece of wisdom: people will make you happier than a job ever will.”
Mom heads down the hallway. I head for the sink. I’m turning on the faucet and opening the dishwasher when I hear the door open.
Wyatt steps inside the kitchen.
Stomach dropping, I take in the way his hair curls out from underneath his hat. The sleeves of his jacket and shirt are pushed up, revealing his thick, tattooed forearms. They’re bronze from the sun and covered in a furry sheen of hair.
I drop the plate I’m rinsing. It lands with a clatter in the sink.
Wyatt looks up with a smirk. “Just who I was hoping to see. Sawyer said you were up here, helpin’ your mama.” He glances across the kitchen.
“She’s in the bathroom.”
“Good.” He strides over to the sink and melts his front to my back, placing his hands on either side of mine on the lip of the sink. “You know I wanna take you home tonight, right?” he murmurs against my neck.
A wave of longing crashes through me at the feel of his body surrounding mine. Thick veins crisscross the back of his hands. His chest feels impossibly huge, impossibly solid as he breathes into me.
“You know I wanna come home with you, right?” I turn off the water, mentally cataloguing everything I’m going to throw in my overnight bag. Toothbrush, deodorant, the least ratty pajamas I own. I’m definitely leaving my retainers at home. Should I bring a razor in the off chance I stay more than one night?
Wyatt gives my neck a quick, tiny bite. “I need you to know it’s killin’ me not to invite you over. But you come with me, I’m not gonna be able to keep my hands off you. And I want to be intentional. Dinner first. Then?—”
“Fucking.” I get what he’s saying, but my heart still falls a little.
“You got a mouth on you, Sunshine.”
“You got some nerve, handsome, making me wait. When do you propose we go on this date?”
“Friday. I know Frisky Whiskey is taking a break on account of your drummer having pneumonia. My place. I’ll make dinner.”
Laughing, I turn around in the circle of his arms and put my hands on his chest. “But you don’t cook.”
“Lotsa firsts happening these days.” Wyatt doesn’t budge, keeping me trapped against the sink so that our faces are inches apart.
Less when he leans his weight into his hands, flattening his hips against mine.
“What can I bring?”
The need between my legs coils tighter as he hovers over me, a massive, smirking slab of cowboy. “Just the shit you’ll need for a sleepover. Forget the jammies though. We don’t wear those at my house.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” His eyes get this hazy look in them before he leans in and kisses me. “Aw, Sunshine, you got me feelin’ a whole lot better than okay.”
“And you have me feeling like I have the world’s worst case of sexual frustration. You keep doing this to me.”
His turn to laugh. “Patience pays off.”
“You’d better put your money where your mouth is, cowboy.”
“Lucky for you, I’m real good with my money and my mouth.” He kisses me again. “Friday. Five o’clock. I’ll come pick you up.”