19. Levi
I’m a chicken shit, tell me something I don’t know.
The Milan Milpensa Airport was calm as I exited my plane from Paris.
It was a smooth flight, nothing exciting except I was sweating bullets because in just a few minutes I was going to see my best friend.
We hadn’t talked for more than a few minutes at a time since the festival and I was afraid we had ruined our friendship because we slept with the same woman.
I sighed, adjusting my glasses as I looked for my connecting flight gate. Matteo and I were sharing a flight in seats right next to each other. I wouldn’t be able to ignore him anymore and I was afraid that our relationship would no longer be the same. My worst fear was coming true.
I found my gate that was getting ready to board and Matteo was standing in front, scrolling on his phone. He looked sexy in chinos with a polo tucked in, looking like a damn model who had just gotten out of a photo shoot. My heart beat faster as I walked closer to him.
“Hey man,” I said, feeling idiotic for being so nervous.
“Levi,” he said, smiling, pulling me in for a hug.
He smelled familiar, his embrace hadn’t changed. I sagged against him, my eyes tearing up from the relief I felt, that we might be ok.
“I’ve missed you. Milan isn’t as fun without you,” he said.
“Yeah, I missed you too. The apartment was lonely,” I said, as we released each other.
He chuckled. “Paola said she missed you and to say hello. She also asked if she could come on the boat with us.”
“Hell no,” we said together, and laughed.
“I miss her,” I said, as they called our group.
“She’s a pain, but I love her anyway,” he sighed, looking for his ticket on his phone while we walked up to the gate.
“So, how was Milan?” I wondered if he was going to tell me he saw Vi.
“It was good,” he said as we boarded the plane. “Paola and I ran into Violeta and guess what?”
“Oh no, what happened?” I got slightly jealous again.
Vi didn’t tell me much, just that she ran into Matteo and sent a few pictures of Lake Como.
“Paola had actually met her in London and I got roped into taking them to Lake Como,” he said, as we found our seats.
I put my suitcase in the overhead bin and sat down in the aisle seat next to Matteo, who had the window seat. It was only a two and a half hour flight, but we booked business class because we needed the room.
“You can say you were bullied by your sister,” I chuckled.
“I couldn’t say no to the both of them,” he sighed.
“So… did you guys have fun?” I asked, when he didn’t say anything else.
“Yeah, Paola ditched us the first night for her booty call,” he said, rolling his eyes.
“Then the second night I was stuck in hotel hell with a system that failed us and we had to go back to using paper for almost everything. Paola said they had fun the second day and I had to stay back while they went home the following day.”
“Well, I’m glad she got to see Lake Como,” I said, trying to appear nonchalant, but I was desperate to hear more.
“Yeah, she looked completely enthralled when we arrived; I think she almost cried too,” Matteo said, grabbing a folder out of his bag.
I didn’t know what else to say, letting the silence grow louder.
My mind raced with different ways to start a conversation, but I would chicken out before I even opened my mouth.
The lull of the plane was relaxing. I was exhausted and fell asleep after we received our drinks and snack, waking up on Matteo’s shoulder when the captain said we were landing in Athens.
“Shit, sorry.” I straightened up immediately.
“Doesn’t bother me,” he said, reading papers he had in his hand. “It’s not the first time you've done it.”
He smirked and my stupid face felt hot.
“Yeah, planes make me sleepy,” I said, running my hand over my face to finish waking up.
“That’s an understatement,” he chuckled. “I don’t think I’ve ever been on a flight that you haven’t slept on, maybe unless it was under an hour. Makes me jealous. I wish I could sleep as soundly as you.”
“It’s my special gift,” I shrugged, glancing at him.
“Yeah,” he said, smiling softly.
“We are about to land so please raise your table trays,” a flight attendant said to Matteo.
“Will do,” he said, putting his papers away.
Descent always freaks me out. This pilot was smooth.
“I’m eager to see Ruwon,” I said, unbuckling myself and getting up.
“I am too,” he said. “He sounded better the last time I saw him.”
“Yeah, he does,” I said, grabbing our bags. “I hope Italy was good for him.”
“You know they spoiled him the moment he got off the plane,” I said, remembering hearing our parents in the background. “He needed it.”
“He says he hates it,” Matteo grumbled. “He always thinks he has to be the one who is taking care of everyone. I don't know what the military did to him, but I think we need to tell him he needs to talk to someone.”
“Yeah, I agree,” I said, feeling like an imposter for saying Ru needed to speak to someone when I needed to do some talking of my own and I was chickenshit about it.
I just wanted things to go back to normal and each time I thought about talking to Matteo, the thought of not having my best friends by me terrified me. I was an imposter, but living without them sounded like a life I wouldn’t ever want.
“Honey, I'm home!!!” Matteo called out when we arrived at the house we were renting for two weeks.
“In the kitchen!” Ru called out.
I grinned, dropping my bags, slipping off my shoes, and looking around for the kitchen.
“Just where we like you,” Matteo chuckled as we walked into the kitchen.
“Screw you,” Ru laughed, as he hugged Matteo.
I couldn’t wait, wrapping my arms around them.
“Damn, we missed you, Ru,” I said, leaning my head against his shoulder.
“It was too long to be apart,” Matteo grumbled as we let go.
“Yeah, I've missed you guys,” Ru said, running a hand through his hair.
“Damn, dude. You're ripped.” Matteo grabbed his arm. “Your arm is as big as my thigh.”
I laughed, looking him over and he looked like he had bulked up.
“You look good though,” I said, clapping his shoulder.
Ru grew red as he chuckled. “There's not much else to do there except work out to pass the time.”
“So, that’s all you did?” I asked, hoping he would tell us the truth.
“Here are some beers and some appetizers because if we are jumping into my shit, I need a beer,” he said, passing a few things to Matteo.
“Fair enough,” I said as I followed Matteo outside to a nice patio.
Greece’s weather was perfect and I desperately needed more sun. We spread out the appetizers and put the bucket of beer in the middle of the table.
“How was your flight?” Ru asked, passing out a few beers.
“Good,” I said, taking a sip.
“Yeah, he slept most of the way,” Matteo said, rolling his eyes.
Ru chuckled, “I should have known.”
“I can’t help it,” I shrugged. “I’m exhausted from working and I didn’t even get a chance to finish.”
“Are you going to have to finish while you're here?” Ru asked.
“Yeah, the company said I can do it when I get back,” I said, taking another drink. “But I hate leaving things unfinished. I’m almost done, and they have the most important parts working.”
“Did you end up sending the program to that girl you've been talking to?” Ru asked and my blood pressure rose.
I wasn’t prepared to talk about her while Matteo was here.
“No, I felt bad asking her to, even though I need a break from it,” I said, taking a bigger swallow of my beer.
“Do you have a new girl working for you?” Matteo asked, confused.
“No, he’s talking about Vi,” I said, feeling my face get hot. “She is also a programmer and she offered to take a look at it.”
“Isn’t that risky? What if she takes your work?” Matteo scowled.
I clenched my jaw from annoyance. “I trust her.”
“I think that is stupid. She’s a fucking stranger,” he snapped, taking a long swig of his beer.
“If Levi trusts her, then maybe we should trust her too,” Ru said, looking between us.
Matteo scoffed. “The woman who keeps disappearing in the middle of the night and just so happened to be at the same festival we were at. Don’t you think—”
“Like you don’t leave in the middle of the night,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“Yeah, but the women I spend the night with know that it’s only one night.” He grabbed another beer.
“You didn’t have a problem with her when we slept together,” I snapped. “What the hell is the issue now?”
He looked between me and Ru like he didn’t know what to say.
“I just don’t want you to get hurt,” he said softer.
“I’m a big boy, Matteo,” I sighed. “Vi has been nothing but nice. She hasn’t once tried to take advantage of me.”
Matteo shook his head. “I need to take a leak.”
He left, leaving Ru and me in silence.
“Whatever is going on between you guys is festering and the longer you don’t talk about it, the worse it’s going to get,” Ru said, grabbing a piece of fruit. “I promise nothing will happen.”
“You don’t know that,” I said, finishing my beer. “You can’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“Things might be hard at first, but we’ve been friends for years,” he said, leaning back.
“Matteo isn’t going to throw away your friendship.
He loves you and so do I. We’ve been friends for too long to let something like this tear us apart, but with the way you two are acting, you are going to tear us apart. ”
My lip trembled. I felt trapped and nothing sounded like it was going to fix us. Matteo's steps grew closer as I took a deep breath before he sat down.
“Look, I’m sorry I’m being an ass, but I just want you to be happy ok?” He sighed. “I know meeting a new person can be all consuming and I just don’t want you to get wrapped up in someone who has the power to hurt you.”
“I am happy.” Fucking liar. “I was happy with whatever arrangement we had.”
Ru’s gaze on me made me feel too vulnerable. I knew he was pushing me to say something.
“Look, we probably won’t see her again,” I shrugged. “No point in arguing over her.”
Matteo nodded. “You’re right.”
“I think—”