10. Sawyer
I likedthat no one here believed in the egotistical practices of being fashionably late. Right at seven-thirty, everyone that I had invited had shown up. Almost everyone.
I was able to notice when Mel gave herself mental high fives over the success of tonight. She’d wiggle her eyebrows as she appreciated her work. My name was on the invite, but it wouldn’t have been possible without her.
I had Jet, my night worker, secured inside all by himself—the way he preferred it. I told him he could set up the appetizers and organize the music for when it was time to shift the party indoors. I thought I saw a smile form on his face when I finished my proposal, but it was probably just the way the shadows cast on his face.
Jet liked his space, and for it to be exactly how he wanted it. He’s a one-man show and that’s why I leave the night shifts to him.
“Hey’a Sawyer,” Mel broke off from her conversations. “Ready to make a speech?”
“You’re joking. That wasn’t talked about. We didn’t talk about a speech.” There was no way I was going to make a speech. I’ll give a couple of thank you’s in passing, a head nod of gratitude even, but I will not be making any sort of speech.
She started to hysterically laugh. “I’m kidding, bud.” She nudged her hip into me, “You really did something, ya know that?”
I studied the group moving about the dirt lot. They pointed to their friends, admiring the new paint job and hanging lights I had around outside.
I had gained a sense of accomplishment for something so mundane to some, yet so miraculous to myself. I did it. And without my family’s name attached to it.
“I hope so,” I finally responded.
Clink, clink, clink…
Ringing from a glass flute stopped everybody in their tracks. Mel and I nipped our conversation and descended from the porch steps. Gus had managed to huddle everyone out front, gathering their full attention.
“I guess they beat ya to the speech, after all,” Mel whispered over her shoulder.
“Hi, everybody,” Leanne started. “It is so great to see how many of you showed up tonight.” The crowd whistled and cheered with excitement.
“As you know, this shack of a restaurant here is mine and Lee’s firstborn,” Gus chimed in, looking at their children and grandchildren who were clustered in the back of the store. Some nodded, others rolled their eyes. It was a rarity that they came down here, so I knew how much it meant to Gus and Leanne that they showed up.
Mel couldn’t help but snort out a quiet laugh. She knew how much this place meant to her grandparents, and she just might be the only family member who ever accepted it for just that.
“But over the last couple of years, we haven’t been as hands-on as we once were.” He started to walk over, stopping an arm’s length away from me. He extended out his arm and let his hand rest on my shoulder. He looked dead straight into my eyes, “This man right here has turned this place into something I could have never imagined it being. It feels like a home away from home, the way it was always meant to be.”
I looked down at him, as he is easily a foot shorter than I am, and saw that he was fighting back tears. I patted his back, gave him a single nod, and then gave Leanne a wink. I felt my eyes swell up too. And unlike my previous habits, I let a tear trickle down my face. I wasn’t going to hold back any of my feelings. These were feelings that deserved to see the light of day, and I cherished the fact that they held me on a pedestal.
It made me want to work that much harder.
Gus continued, “This is his night. This is all his now.” He turned his attention back to the crowd, “And we are so pleased to see you all welcome him and The Hideout with open minds and big hearts.”
And just like that, I couldn’t ignore the petite redhead that peeked out behind my produce guy. She bobbed back and forth behind the burly man’s shoulders, trying to follow Gus and Leanne as they wrapped up their speech. There was a calmness that she exuded even in chaos.
“…to Sawyer,” Gus and Leanne said in unison and the crowd repeated after them. “We pass the torch, officially, to you.” Gus handed me his glass of sparkling cider.
I downed the drink and everyone went back to chatting among themselves as they moved inside. I placed the glass down on the railing and wove my way towards her while the crowd passed by me.
“You came,” I stopped in front of her right before she reached the bottom step.
Her head shot up, her eyes went wide with shock. Once she realized it was me, her face sort of lightened up. “That’s what she said,” she chuckled, then moved past me.
Alright, so she’s pretty and funny.
“I don’t think I have ever seen this place this packed before,” she continued as we met the threshold. I stopped beside her. “Except for one time when there was a bad storm that came out of nowhere and everyone huddled in here to take cover. We were squeezed in here like packed sardines, but I didn’t care. I wanted warm fries and vanilla ice cream.”
“You wanted ice cream while it was cold out?”
She enthusiastically nodded her head and let out a small snort, one she thought she could hide, but I unavoidably heard. She blushed and covered her face.
“That is so gross, I’m sorry.”
“I don’t think gross was the word I would use,” I said. She removed her hands from her cheeks. “What is gross is that god-awful combination. What would compel someone to mix those two things?”
She scoffed. “You’re telling me you’ve never heard of anyone doing that before?”
“My cousin Holland does it. That doesn’t mean that I support it.”
“You have to have some sort of weird food concoction,” she said, crossing her arms.
I dramatically tapped my chin and looked up at the sky, displaying my thinking face. I laughed at the first thing that came to mind. I knew that I had no place to judge… “Chocolate-covered bacon,” I said definitively.
As she made a theatrical gagging noise, pointing her finger at her tongue sticking out of her mouth, I felt a firm hand grasp my shoulder.
It can’t be. Because it wasn’t. Of course my grandfather wouldn’t show up.
It seems I twisted the knife when I headed off to Europe to join my parents in all my angst years ago. I was tired of being controlled by the puppet master known as my grandfather. I thought he would respect me a little bit more, for I had at least given him notice, unlike my dad. But it made no difference whatsoever.
It was clear that he was furious with all of us at this point. So much so that he couldn’t even show up tonight when he only lives an hour away.
I’ll never regret Europe, though. I’ll only ever reminisce over it. My parents and I drank our wine and ate the best food there ever was. They got to relive their adventures all over again by showing me the special crooks and crevices.
I had the chance to watch them smile and love life immensely, something I hadn’t seen much of growing up thanks to the long nights in office buildings.
An indefinite vacation of bouncing around England, Ireland, Greece, and everything in between sounded like the perfect “unplanned” plan I had in ages. If I no longer had to follow the one laid out for me, I had endless opportunities to create one of my own.
There were even a couple of weeks that summer when I sent the family jet back to the States so my buddies could pile on in and meet me in Prague. We tore up the nightlife scene there. I didn’t have to monitor how many drinks I was taking in, or who I kept as company. I wasn’t being watched. For the first time in my life, I didn’t have eyes, or camera lenses, on me.
Once I learned that my parents were actively making a life of their own there, I decided to head back to Connecticut. To Rider. It was more than a vacation for them, more than a break from the Banks Business. They were truly living the life they were meant to, the life they deserved.
Now I’m living the life I believed I deserved, too. I deserve this. Even if he didn’t agree.
“Hey’a, you bothering our girl over here?” Gus interrupts us, Leanne goes to Lucy with a bear hug of an embrace. Think I heard a couple of her bones break with how hard she hugged her.
“He’s being a very polite host by coming over here to greet me,” she said over Leanne’s shoulder, staring at me.
The way she is looking at me, playfully. Maybe there’s hope to win her over after all.
“That’s good to hear,” Gus says with a raise of both his brows, followed by a teasing grin.
“I was just about to show Lucy the lake,” I cut the conversation short.
“You’re going to show the lake to the girl who knows this lake like the back of her hand?” Gus said disgruntled.
I chewed on the inside of my cheek, waiting for him to call bullshit. Instead, he clicked his tongue at me but nodded at us to go ahead. How generous of him to permit us.
Jet’s biker friends were the majority of those who mobbed the patio tables outside and filtered in and out of The Hideout in between their drags of cigarettes. They stuck to the late-night crowd for the most part, but I always appreciated when the regulars could all be together. Cherry was already bringing out a second tray of appetizers to their tables.
Lucy and I passed by, and I exchanged the go-to nod with them. You know, the kind that says, “Hey, good to see you. How are you doing? Oh, that’s great. Alright, let me get that shot of whiskey and a tall boy for you right away.” They weren’t men of many words. It was a change of pace from what I am used to with the girls—I appreciated the vast difference.
“Ah, yes,” Lucy twirled, her boots kicking dirt up underneath her feet. “Hummingbird Lake. Oh, yup,” she cupped her hands over her eyes like makeshift glasses and squinted. “Still there. Lookin’ the same!” she teased.
“Oh, come on,” I started ahead, unbuttoning the top two buttons of my dress shirt. Right on cue, Billy galloped behind us emerging from wherever he was, and trekked alongside me. Lucy swiftly joined, skipping behind.
“Hi, doggy!” Her eyes lit up.
“That’s Billy,” I said, pulling the hem of my shirt from my denim waistband.
“Billy, you might just be my new best friend. How does that sound? Are we new besties, Billy?” Lucy crouched to give him neck scratches. Right on cue, he started kicking his back left leg, rustling up the dirt beneath him.
The willow tree lights that hung along the lake loop were bright tonight. And the cicadas were emerging, competing with the chirps from crickets while the partygoers socialized, enjoying the evening in its entirety. The humming of distant chatter became further as I decided to take a step away from it all.
When I was a child, at mandatory Christmas parties with a majority of people I hadn’t known, I found unused rooms often occupied with coats and purses of whatever family member’s house I was at and hid away for the night. The difference is that I knew everyone here tonight, loved their company even—but I guess old habits die hard.
I wanted to avoid any commentary, even if it”s been positive so far. I don’t think I’m ready to see my place filled with opinions and standards. At least not yet. It was different than before. I know that some were aware of the changes being made, but it was all gradual. Now it was BOOM! All mine. Just like Gus said it was in his speech.
And the definiteness of it all scared me.
I have the power to mess up and have no one to pass it off on.
The whole town had their eyes on me.
I am well aware that a night walk wasn’t on Mel’s itinerary for me, but I was writing it in. Time to loosen up.
“Maybe it’s time to see Hummingbird through a new shade of colored glasses,” I said, leading us on the walking trail.