An Ernest Walk
Sami is leaning against the brick wall in the alley beside the restaurant when I head over to do our daily dog exchange. I
didn’t expect he’d still be here; I’m almost half an hour later than our usual time. I tug Ernest’s leash, and the little
guy trails after me without any sense of urgency, taking his tiny steps like each foot exists in its own universe.
“Hey, sorry for the wait. Got caught up with building stuff.” Sami’s whole face breaks into a grin as he kneels to touch Ernest’s
nose. “You weren’t just waiting here the whole time?” I ask as my feet crunch against the gravel.
“I guess I was?” Sami’s eyes flash toward me like he was caught out.
“I’m so sorry. I was trying to handle these electrical inspections, and it was just . . . a nightmare. I lost track of time.”
I don’t mention that I took a shower after I got back from Norm’s place to wash any remnants of stink off, then lay in a towel
staring at the wall for ten minutes letting my thoughts disturb me, before I realized I needed to go.
“Oh, it’s all good.” Sami’s voice is easygoing. “I was just adding unsalted nuts to the crow trading post I’m trying to get
going.” He gestures to a tall metal bird bath contraption next to the diner that I’d never noticed before, and continues,
“I figure if I keep giving them little gifts here, one day they will give me something in return. A piece of foil or button
is my dream.”
I nod, and my words come out automatically. “Well, thanks for understanding. I know you’re busy.” I hold out the leash handle. All I want to do right now is get back to my apartment, bury my head in my pillows, and try to pass out.
“Not that busy. Like I said, I’m trying to get Russell over there to be my friend, and it’s not going well.” He chuckles as he points
to a crow on a powerline, but his grin flattens when we lock eyes. “Hey, Mona, you doing okay?”
“Yep,” I nod. “Fine. Like I said, the inspections were just a little chaotic.”
Sami stares at me a touch too hard, like he’s trying to decipher something. “Why don’t you come for a walk with us? The street
is good this time of night.”
“I can’t. I should get back to . . .” My voice fades at the realization that I don’t have anywhere I need to be. I don’t have
anything left to do. Maybe I can learn embroidery?
“It’ll only be a few minutes,” Sami promises as he starts walking up the alley. “Come on, let’s make that Bill Cleg guy with
the infograph proud.”
I suppress a grin as I catch up to him. It’s unfortunate that he has a knack for remembering all the weirdo shit I’ve said
as of late.
Our steps fall in line together. He hands me back the leash, and the comforting warmth from his hands is still infused in
the leather. “As a fellow local businessperson,” he says, “you should never take a rough inspection personally.”
“Is that so?” I glance up at his half grin.
“Yep. It’s par for the course. I don’t know why, but this one health inspector really had it out for me—I was basically told
I’m a terrible person trying to murder people because my hand soap wasn’t optimally placed near the sink.”
“I mean, fair.” I grin, my mood somewhat boosted. “That’s a clear indicator that you’d let customers shit on the floor if
given the chance.”
“Shit, I did say that, didn’t I?” Sami nods, stoic. “Good point.”
I tug Ernest away from sniffing a tiny plastic baggie on the ground. There’s a bunch of garbage on the sidewalk, so I watch
my feet, taking careful steps lest I step in anything unseemly.
Sami’s gaze moves down the alleyway. “We used to play street hockey here. It was the only road nearby where cars weren’t constantly
driving.” He must catch the skepticism in my eyes because he quickly adds, “It was a lot different then, if you can believe
it.”
I try to imagine that. Right now, it’s not uncommon for an actual human turd to crop up around here. Heartbreaking, if I think
too hard about it. “I’m having a hard time picturing it back then.”
Sami’s lips press together, a distant look in his eyes. “The whole street was busy, not full of ugly construction lots, but
with little family shops and stuff. My friend Theo lived in your building when his family first moved to Canada. They used
to own a florist. Irene loved them because they were always bringing her flowers.”
“So you’ve known Irene a long time, then?” I ask, remembering the birthday flowers Sami’s family must’ve had to get from elsewhere,
now that their local florist is long gone.
“Oh yeah, she’s always been awesome about supporting us. Like, I’m sure you’ve experienced her pushy pitches about the best
local this or that.” Sami shakes it off with a small grin, but I can tell he appreciates it.
“Just a little.” I remember when I first moved in, I was sure I wouldn’t be living in such a place for much time. Irene gave
me a whole printout of places in the area she likes. It sat on my counter for a while and eventually I threw it in the bin.
When I got takeout or went for drinks, I usually did it around the office anyway.
We reach the end of the alley, marked by a dumpster that’s equal parts spray paint and piss, and Ernest adds his piddly contribution to the collective.
The road has all the ambience that three construction sites in a row can offer.
There’s a perpetual beeping from the yellow machinery kept in their ugly orange-fenced enclosures.
Sami pushes the crosswalk button for us as we make our way toward what I’ve mentally dubbed Ernest’s Park. “Where did you
grow up?” he asks me.
“Nowhere exciting. Just a bungalow in Renfrew.”
His eyes flit my way. “Wait, so you’re from Calgary?”
“Yeah.”
“I guess I assumed you came here for college or your job or something.”
I shake my head. “No, I’ve been in the city pretty much my whole life.”
“Cool.” I feel his eyes on me, but I keep looking ahead, watching Ernest examining several blades of grass. “So your mom’s
in town?”
“Yeah. She’s still in our old house.”
“Not too far, then.” His voice brightens. “That’s convenient.”
“Yeah . . .” I smile tightly. I’ve seen her maybe three times since my dad passed, and one of those was at a registry to get
some paperwork filled for his non-estate. A weird kind of unfounded shame digs at me, even though I know it’s for the best
I haven’t seen a lot of her recently—she can’t help me right now, and I’m not able to help her in any real way. Turning back
to Sami, I say, “Not as convenient as you have it, though.”
Sami rolls his eyes. “Yes, my parents are like unhealthily close to me.”
“It’s nice.” I try to smile, but I need off this topic. “So, tell me about the hairstyle.”
He quirks an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”
“You know, the awful haircut you had back in the alley-hockey days.”
“Oh, of course.” His nose crinkles. “I guess it was like, the longer swoopy one? A little bit Tony Hawk? Wait, are you laughing?”
I press my lips together to stifle it. “I’m sorry, but only because that’s exactly what I was picturing.”
“Wow. Laughing at me with an imagined haircut seems cheap.” Sami’s grinning along with me.
We make our way around the corner past the alley. Ernest starts to pull the leash as soon as the park comes into view. Sami
introduces me to Ernest’s favorite tree, which is different from the one I’d been thinking—but he’s right, this is totally
the real favorite tree. After, Ernest goes through his protocol of sniffing all the benches and street poles on his list.
We start making our way back to my apartment and the stress slowly makes its way back to me. Somehow during our walk, I’d
almost forgotten about the day I had, until I spot the cardboard covering Norm’s window. I wonder if he’ll actually make it
out to get stitches tonight.
Sami’s expression lifts as he spots Old White Perve and Fancy Widow standing just outside the apartment’s entrance. Lorna’s
fur-trimmed coat is a stark contrast to Carmen’s ripped Wranglers. Their voices carry from the front walkway. Fancy Widow
giggles as Carmen loud-whispers, “It’s not like in our day. They’d take you out back and—”
I feel like I’ve more than hit my quota for strange interactions with the building’s residents today, so I’m planning on sneaking
past them quietly, but of course Sami has to call out, “Hey, you two!”
Carmen stops whatever he was saying and turns toward us. His eyes swoop suspiciously over me, but he doesn’t say anything.
At least Fancy Widow gives me a microscopic nod.
Sami, oblivious to any tension, continues, “Carmen, I started streaming that movie you suggested with the folks who wake up
in a cube. I’ll finish it tonight.”
In an instant, laugh lines appear around the sides of Carmen’s lips. “You actually watched Cube?”
An intrusive groan of drilling from a jackhammer shakes through our group. In unison we all wince, while Sami flips off the general direction of the construction site next door, where the sound is coming from.
“So what do ya think of the film?” Carmen asks when it’s finally quiet enough to do so.
“It’s interesting.” But Sami’s expression gives him away.
“Hear that, Lornie? Now you have to watch.”
“Oh, stop.” She flicks her hand as though Carmen said something truly naughty, the shine of her maroon nails dancing in the
sunlight.
I smile too, but immediately Carmen looks away, while Lorna checks her watch. “I better get going,” she mutters.
“I’ll walk you. I’m headed that way too,” Carmen offers, and trails after her.
As soon as they’re out of earshot, Sami leans into me and whispers, “That guy’s movies recs are never great, but curiosity
always gets me.”
I half smile, before remembering the unfortunate noises his film made earlier today. “It’s nice you get along with so many
people in the building. I’m pretty sure everyone hates me now that I’ve taken over super duties.”
“I’m sure that’s not true,” Sami says, too sincerely. “Everyone here seems pretty chill.”
I can’t stop myself—I actually guffaw. Sami sends me a sideways look. “Sorry.” I clear my throat. “It’s just—not how I’d describe it. I had to break up a fight my first day on the job. And it’s not exactly gotten better.”