Chapter Eighteen
Seraphine
Ever since that intense conversation with Elliot a few days ago, things between us have been different.
I feel closer to him, slightly more comfortable, even with the sexual tension between us being ten times higher than it was.
Something changed that night… trust maybe? Could it be something so simple?
I’m getting ready to grab lunch at one of the places down the block. Usually Elliot and I have lunch together every day, but he is on site at a job right now. He already told me he wouldn’t be back in time but made me promise not to work through my break and eat. So that’s what I’m going to do.
Since he isn’t here, I expected Ian to slide in and ask me to lunch again.
I’ve been dodging him all week, letting him know I already have plans and can’t make it.
I don’t want to outright tell him his boss said I can’t have lunch with him because I know that’s weird.
There’s nothing in the policy about employees dating, but also…
who said it even was a date? It could be friendly.
Still, I don’t want to get myself into another mess.
I close my laptop and grab my bag, heading for the door when I nearly bump into someone. For a second, I think it’s Elliot, until I step back and see it’s not.
It’s Harrison.
“Oh, hey. How are you?” he asks.
“I’m good. How are you?”
“I’ve been calling you, Sera.”
“I know, I’m sorry. Things have just been really chaotic.”
I never called him back. Not once. Elliot told me he spoke with Harrison, that he asked about me. He told him I was fine, just busy. He steps deeper into the room, then closes the door to his father’s office, trapping us here together. My heart picks up with the thought of not being able to leave.
“I was hoping we could talk.”
“About what?” I ask, gripping my purse tighter.
“About us. What happened. I need to explain.”
I shake my head. “I promise you don’t. Everything is fine.”
“It’s not though.” He takes a step closer to me.
“It is, Harrison. Trust me.”
“Sera, I miss you.”
My spine goes straight at those words, my skin running ice cold.
“Please, can we talk?”
“Okay, sure. Just not now. I’m heading to lunch to meet someone. Can you call me later?”
“Are you going to answer?” he asks, sounding impatient—annoyed.
“I will. I swear.”
He takes a deep breath, then nods. I hurry around him.
“Where is my father?”
“He’s at a job site.” I grip the doorknob and pull the door open. “He won’t be back for a few hours. You’re more than welcome to wait.”
As I hurry toward the elevator, I pray he isn’t following me.
The last thing I want to do is talk to him about anything.
I don’t want to hear about how he misses me, and I don’t want to deal with him begging me for another chance.
I’m not saying that’s what he’ll do, but what if?
I don’t know if I’m strong enough to have that conversation with him.
How will I tell him that I don’t forgive him and that I can never look at him the same after seeing him in bed with his sister?
I suppose the easiest way would be to just say it, but that’s easier said than done.
I want to be the person who can say what she feels and tells people off without feeling bad, but that’s just not me. It’s not who I am. It’s who Elliot is though… And maybe that’s why I’m so drawn to him. Not only his power, but his confidence.
Thankfully, no one else from this floor steps onto the elevator when I get on. It makes a few stops on the way down, but no one I know gets on. I share friendly smiles, stepping to the side to make room, but once we get to the bottom floor, we disperse and go our own ways.
When I return from lunch, I head back into Elliot’s office but pause at the door when I see it’s closed and hear someone inside.
“—it’s weird that she’s working for you and doesn’t have a desk.”
“If Seraphine was uncomfortable with her work setting, she would tell me.”
“No, she wouldn’t,” Harrison growls. “She doesn’t know how to speak up for herself.”
I frown, my stomach turning sour.
“Seraphine speaks for herself just fine, Harrison.”
“It’s obvious you know nothing about her, which makes this all the more fucked up.”
“How about you just tell me what the issue is,” Elliot says.
“The issue is you working so closely with my ex and not finding it strange. You’re weird with her, and this whole situation is creepy.”
It’s silent for a long moment before Elliot says, “As I said before, if she had an issue, she would tell me.”
“I’m telling you,” Harrison growls.
“You have no right to speak for her. And quite frankly, the way you are speaking for her is degrading.”
Well, if I needed any reason not to talk with Harrison, this is it. Not that I’d mention I overheard them speaking, but at least this is fuel to keep ignoring him. Except right now, it seems. Because I find myself knocking on the door and just as quickly pushing it open.
Elliot looks over at me from behind the desk. Harrison turns to face me, his frown disappearing when he sees it’s me. They’re both standing, both stiff.
“Hey, you found him,” I say to Harrison, forcing a smile and feigning confidence I don’t have. But something about having Elliot here, knowing he’d stick up for me, makes this much easier. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with a little support…
“I finished up early,” Elliot explains.
“Oh, good,” I say.
I put my things into the closet before turning back to the men, running my hands down my shirt to straighten out any wrinkles.
Harrison scoffs, moving toward me and speaking low. “Make sure you answer your phone when I call you later.” And then he leaves without another word.
I stare after him, feeling Elliot watching me, until I turn to face him. His face is a blank canvas. I can’t tell what he’s thinking or how he feels about the entire thing, but something tells me he knows I heard their conversation. At least, some of it. Who knows what I missed out on.
“Did you have a good lunch?” he asks.
“It was okay.”
“Where did you go?”
“The little Italian place two blocks down,” I say calmly.
“Not the best, but decent.”
“Have you eaten?” I ask.
“Not yet.”
“I can get you something,” I offer.
“That’s all right, I’m not very hungry.”
I nod, then take the seat in front of his desk. “What does our afternoon look like?”
Elliot hesitates, eyes still on me, before taking his seat and opening up his laptop.
“I’ll share my calendar with you.”
I smile. “That’s a big step.”
“You’ve earned it.”
Pride swells in my chest as I wait for him to set it up.
Harrison calls me closer to eight, when I’m showered and in pajamas. I’ve already eaten dinner and am just sitting on the couch, lounging and watching TV. There isn’t a reason to ignore him, but I want to. If I do, he’d only call back. Maybe show up.
“Hey,” I answer.
“You answered.”
“I said I would.”
“Well, I wasn’t sure.”
His tone tells me he’s annoyed. Tired maybe. I don’t know. He wasn’t in a great mood earlier today, and it doesn’t seem like it’s changed.
“What did you want to talk about?”
I expect him to explain what happened between him and Angela.
Try to give a version of the story that will make me forgive him or understand where he’s coming from.
Harrison isn’t a terrible person, but after hearing that he thinks I can’t speak for myself, I’ve been wondering how much of our relationship was dictated by him thinking that.
Did he manipulate me because he thought I couldn’t speak for myself?
Did he use that to his advantage? I’m starting to wonder if I know him at all.
I think back on different situations and try to pinpoint when Harrison would have done this to me before, but I can’t think of any.
Not off the top of my head. The way he talked about me to his father, though?
That isn’t an opinion of me that he formed over night.
I want for his bullshit to come, but what comes from the other end of the phone has my jaw dropping.
“Is there something going on with you and my father?”
“What? No! Why would you even ask that?”
“Because he’s being a creep, Sera. Don’t you see that?
” He doesn’t let me get a word in to explain that no, he isn’t being a creep.
He’s helping me at a time when I need help.
Helping me when no one else in this world would.
“It’s weird that you work at his desk with him.
Weird that he’s paying for your apartment on top of giving you a paycheck. He’s twice your age.”
“I work for my paycheck,” I say.
“Yeah, and what about the rest of it?”
“He pays for your apartment.”
“He’s my father,” he argues. “That’s normal. You’re nothing to him.”
My chest grows heavy at those words.
I’m nothing to him?
It’s not that I thought I meant something to Elliot Caldwell, but to go as far as saying I’m nothing?
That’s a little harsh, isn’t it? He’s done so much for me, so there has to be a reason for that.
There has to be something… He admitted there was, even if it was only attraction. That’s not nothing.
“He’s just trying to be nice, Harrison. Since you—”
“No, Sera. He’s being a fucking weirdo, and I don’t like it. I don’t think you should work with him. Maybe you should move back in with me.”
Those words have my throat closing up, panic coursing through my veins.
It’s not that I’m afraid of Harrison, but the thought of going to live with anyone isn’t a happy thought.
I like being on my own. I’ve never had this before; never had the freedom to do whatever I want in my own space.
I don’t want to live with him again, especially after what he did to me.
“Harrison, you cheated on me.” The words come out and I hold my breath, waiting for a reply, while in the very deep recesses of my mind, I pat myself on the back for speaking up for myself.
“And I told you I wanted to talk about that.”
“Then let’s talk.” I say it to get him off the subject of his father, because I don’t want to talk about Elliot. Not with him. Also, I think I’m ready to hear what he has to say.
He goes into some explanation about getting caught up in being young and how our relationship got stale, and they were up late one night and things just happened. I ask about the afternoon I caught them, and he says it was just another weak moment.
Another weak moment.
How many of those is he allowed to have without repercussion? How many happened that he isn’t telling me about? Intuition tells me he isn’t telling me the whole truth. I never questioned Harrison’s words or loyalty before, but lately… I’m seeing him in a new light.
“Thank you for explaining,” I say.
“That’s it? That’s all I get?”
“What do you want me to say? I don’t forgive you.”
“I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but I was hoping we could work on things.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”
“What has gotten into you?” he asks, not hiding the animosity in his tone.
“Nothing. I’m just being honest with you.”
“Well, you’re not being yourself.”
I don’t think he knows me at all.
“I’m sorry. Maybe I’m just tired. I’ve been working a lot.”
“My father does tend to suck the life out of people.”
“People at his company are very happy,” I argue.
“Money does that to you. All Elliot Caldwell knows how to do is make people happy with his money.” He sighs heavily. “Get to sleep, Sera. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Night.”
I end the call, not liking the way I feel right now.
Uneasy. Gross. I stare at my phone, wanting to call Elliot.
Why do I want to call him? To rant about his son talking badly about him and talking down to me?
That isn’t nice. I get comfortable on the couch and find a movie to watch.
When I wake up the next morning, I put on the shortest dress I own to thank Elliot for sticking up for me.