Chapter 15 Bates
The way my body has been fluttering all fucking day is driving me insane. Every second leading up to this event felt like a goddamn hour. Especially knowing Serena will be here, dressed to torture me thoroughly, unknowingly.
All while I’m expected to behave and not secure her to my side the second she arrives. It’s going to be damn near impossible to hide my affection for her because I know my eyes will struggle to veer away.
I’ve been fidgeting like a maniac since the moment I got here and the guys have noticed.
“Bates, you’re never this …” Emil searches for the right word, smirking, his Russian accent heavy in his voice. “Anxious for event.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I flip him off.
He laughs, walking back to the bar with Rurik, and I ignore the deep chuckling coming from both of them.
My eyes drift over the party.
It’s a classy event, being held in one of the ballrooms—something built in the arena. I doubt most arenas come complete with grand rooms and chandeliers, but I guess we’re special.
This arena was recently built, an entirely new facility, just for our organization. They created it so we’d have everything we’d ever need, including a place to host galas, apparently.
Gold, black, white, and shades of maroon, pink, and red decorate the space, transforming the plain room into something elegant.
I think Serena will enjoy what the event team has done, but I’m sure she’ll notice things she would’ve done differently—she’s a perfectionist at heart after all.
But one thing I’m certain of: she’ll love the flowers. Dozens of red roses are strewn throughout the room in vases. If there wasn’t going to be a couple hundred other people here, it would be romantic. But unfortunately, I have to share my date with Serena with everyone else.
Almost all the guys on the team have arrived, each one nearly giving me a heart attack when they entered the room. Not their fault, of course, but when I see the doors shift, the world freezes as I wait for her to emerge.
But it looks like we have to work through the entire goddamn roster, their dates, and the coaching staff—aside from her father—first.
Finally, the universe gives me a break.
This time, the doors swing open, and my patience is rewarded when the most stunning woman steps out of the shadows, wearing a burgundy satin gown that was made to be worn by her.
Holy mother of God.
My lips part, jaw lowering, and my breath halts in my lungs as my eyes fall on her. The beating in my chest skips, and my body warms a thousand degrees in her presence.
Flexing my hand at my side, I try to get my racing pulse under control, but I fail.
She’s everything beautiful about this world.
I wet my lips, entranced by her as her stiletto-heeled steps click into the room. Her smooth leg parts the split of her burgundy satin gown, making me harden as I watch how high the slit runs up her smooth thigh.
Her long lashes flutter as she searches the room, a determination in her gaze. The romantic, long waves of her hair are pushed off her shoulders and pinned back from her face with gold barrettes that sparkle beneath the glowing lights.
She looks ethereal with the gold and soft brown makeup, highlighting every facet of her beauty.
I don’t even realize how unabashedly I’m staring, and in this moment, I don't think I could physically tear my gaze from her if I tried.
Anyone in their right mind would be looking at her—they simply couldn’t help it. Just like how I can’t bring myself to look away.
Even though every part of her styling is soft and demure, there’s a sharpness about her tonight, a seriousness in the way her shoulders are set.
I doubt anyone can clock it, but I notice it with ease. The way her jaw is sealed shut, clenching every so often.
I would chalk it up to anxiety and nerves if I had seen this reaction from any events she attended before.
Something’s different this time, and when her piercing eyes latch on to mine, a shiver runs through me as I register the look in her eyes.
Recognition.
Anger.
But there’s another emotion beneath it, an anguish that I desperately wish I could explore. Before I can dissect it further, she looks past me, through me, as if I weren’t even here at all.
That cuts me deeper than I’d like to admit, the ache growing as a blade rips across my chest.
“Dude,” Casper scoffs in disbelief, elbowing my ribs and bringing me back to reality. “Are you trying to get kicked off the team?”
“I barely looked at her.” My automatic defensiveness comes out, but I haven’t even averted my gaze, still watching every rise and fall of her chest.
Cas and I both know how atrocious of a lie that was.
Her stare is burned into my mind, and I summon all my willpower, finally closing my eyes, and mentally focusing on something else. Which almost immediately proves impossible.
I tap my fingers atop the table and sigh, trying to analyze the emotion I saw in her gaze.
She looked at me like I had personally wronged her.
Does she know the truth? Did she figure it out somehow? There’s no way. Or does she just hate Bates Finnegan that much? Maybe.
“Why don’t I get you a drink?” Cas asks, patting my back.
Probably a horrible idea to mix alcohol with my weak resolve right now. I might get onstage and confess my love for my coach’s daughter in front of the entire organization. I shouldn’t—I really shouldn’t. It would be a terrible idea.
“Sounds great. Surprise me. I’m going to take a leak,” I mutter under my breath, my gaze to the ground as I stride away from the guys before they can say anything else.
I disappear down a hallway, deciding at the last second to take the elevator down a floor to a different bathroom, wanting to get as far as possible from Serena so I can catch my breath. But by the time I emerge, I feel even more on edge because I can’t conjure a single thought that’s not of her.
I’m spiraling, completely losing my sanity.
She’s right here, right within reach, and I feel like I’m in a fucking cage with a bit between my teeth.
I can’t talk to her; I can’t touch her.
Sure, the hockey player in me could greet her with a light hug and a smile, but I wouldn’t be able to stop there. Not until her body was flush with mine, my tongue intertwining with hers, showing everyone in the room who she belonged to.
Nothing I ever do with Serena would be just a touch, just a hug; everything is more, and I don’t think I could hide it well enough tonight to keep my secret if I got another inch closer to her.
So, instead, I’ll loiter in this hallway until the event starts, keeping myself as far away from her as possible.
That’s a good, rational plan. One that goes out the window not a second later when I look up and find her walking down the long hallway in my direction.
Oh, you have to be kidding me.
Did she hear my thoughts? Did she sense that her proximity nearly had me on my knees?
She’s typing into her phone, not bothering to look up as her heels click down the hallway, growing louder with each step.
My willpower is a goddamn joke tonight, and every stride she takes toward me has me closer and closer to saying, Fuck it, and telling her everything with her pinned against the wall, her delicious, pliable body filling my hands.
Her eyes flick up, genuine shock in her gaze, and she freezes in place. “Oh.” She glances at the wall to my right, where the sign for the women’s restroom hangs. “Excuse me.”
The tips of my fingers twitch as she steps forward, inches from me as her body passes right beside mine.
If I just stretched my hand ever so slightly, I could graze her hip, feel how silky the satin of her dress was.
But I don’t, sucking my cheek between my teeth to stay strong. Blood bursts in my mouth, and I curse under my breath at the sting of pain that follows.
“Fuck.”
Her head swivels back my way, and for a split second, her eyes soften with vulnerability. “What?”
I react with thought, my skin humming beneath her gaze and attention.
“You look so beautiful tonight.” I force my voice to a slightly higher tone than normal, trying to keep my two worlds apart for a little longer. But I fail.
I can’t hide the emotion in my words, meaning them from the deepest parts of my heart, where only she exists.
It’s not the right time, certainly not when we’re at an event with so many people. But even if we were alone right now, I know I wouldn’t tell her the truth because I’m not ready to face it … the fear that comes with taking the mask off.
It’s not just my career on the line—I’d get over that eventually—but my heart too. I’m fucking terrified that she’ll reject me, that I’ll shrink to the floor, breaking apart at the seams, never to recover.
Because that’s what would happen if she shut me out—I’d crawl into a hole and fucking die.
Her lips part, like she’s going to say something, but she doesn’t say anything at all before turning on her heel and disappearing into the women’s restroom.
My body is moving of its own accord—at least, that’s what I’d like to believe as I quickly walk down the hallway she came from and park myself around the corner to wait.
My body is in control because, certainly, my mind would stop myself from being so reckless if it were at the wheel.
I don’t know what I’m going to do or say. Nothing at all would be best. I should run back to the event with my tail between my legs, but I just can’t stop myself.
She’s consuming me whole.
I could grab my mask from its hiding place and slip it on, making good on my words from last night. But I decide against it, not wanting to risk losing her while I would waste time fetching it.
A few minutes pass as I lie in wait before her heels click on the floor, the snapping sound growing louder as she strides out of the bathroom and down the hallway.
A waft of her sweet perfume fills my nose as she nears. My eyes roll into the back of my head, floating on clouds of strawberry and vanilla and her that I want to get lost in forever.
I shrink myself tighter into the doorframe as she strides past the hallway I’m hiding in, not glancing over.
Relief floods my system, and I relax my shoulders when she doesn’t notice me. When she’s safely past, I step out and peek around the corner, watching where she’s going.
A thought passes into my mind that raises a red flag.
We’re farther from the event than needed.
She could have used a restroom mere feet from the main room, but instead, she chose one closer to her father’s office, down an entire floor. I can’t say much though, I took the same path, hoping to get some space to clear my mind. Maybe she wanted to do the same.
I dismiss the thought, watching her hips sway side to side. That burgundy satin hugs her curves in a way that has my fists clenched at my sides and my cock aching in my pants.
She’ll need to take the next right to go back to the elevator and to the event. But she doesn’t. She turns left, heading toward some of the training rooms.
What are you doing?
I one thousand percent should leave her be and go back upstairs …
Curiosity gets the better of me, as it always does when it comes to her.
I step out of the shadows and silently follow her path down the hallway, careful to glance around the corner as little as possible.
Her eyes bounce from her phone to the doorway at her left, like she’s trying to figure out where to go.
I’m so confused.
Determination sets in her features, and she retrieves a set of keys from her purse—ones that I don’t recognize her ever having before—and she unlocks the door, disappearing inside. The door clicks shut behind her.
One of the rooms that our trainers and physical therapists work out of. Maybe her dad sent her to get something.
Don’t follow her.
Don’t get any closer.
You’re already pushing it way further than you should.
But it’s too late. By the time any rational thought begins to form in my mind, I’m already ten feet down the hallway, approaching the doorframe she passed through.
Inching closer, I turn my head and listen inside.
No noise. No heels clicking. Nothing.
What the fuck are you doing, Serena?
There are no windows on these doors, and there’s no way that I’m opening it and giving myself away. I hate that I don’t have a camera hidden in there so I can watch her and track her every movement, like I usually do.
Ugh, this is such a dumb fucking idea.
What am I doing?
I’m risking everything I’ve worked so hard to build between us because I can’t stop myself.
Pathetic.
Dropping my shoulders, I step back, finally ready to head to the event and ask Casper to punch some sense into me.
Quietly, I step back again, but suddenly, the door before me flies open, and Serena’s gaze locks on to me, as if she knew exactly where I was.
Her face is set tight, lips pressed together and determined. Even from here, I can see her chest rising and falling fast, like she’s all worked up.
Reaching out, she fists my white button-up and yanks me forward, pulling me into the room and releasing me when I’m fully inside.
Standing back a few feet from me, she scowls, biting the inside of her cheek and shaking her head ever so slightly.
I catch myself, the door swinging behind me.
It clicks shut, and the sound is a warning, a beacon calling out and telling me that I’m all alone, trapped in a room with a very angry Serena.
I’m right where I want to be and absolutely terrified at the same time, but the fear could be caused by the rage rolling off of her in boiling waves.
“So. Predictable.” She clicks her tongue in disappointment.