Chapter 26 #2
He backs me toward the couch and we sink into the cushions. Gage pulls me into his lap where I belong and we kiss until our control starts to crack.
His breath is rough against my jaw when he finally speaks. “I thought I was ready to see you today.” He leans back. “I wasn’t.”
God.
I don’t think I was either.
“I missed you,” I whisper, and the words sound ridiculous, considering we’ve only been apart a short time.
But I did.
I missed being looked at like this.
Touched like this.
Loved like this.
His hand finds my thigh. Not sexual. Just grounding.
Or maybe claiming.
Same difference when it comes to Gage.
Also, his hand is warm. Like, really warm.
Why is his hand so warm? Is that a normal hand temperature?
Am I cold? No, wait, I’m fine. It’s just .
. . differential. The thermal differential between his body and mine is fascinating.
Temperature is so weird when you think about it.
Like, we’re all just walking around at different temperatures, touching each other, exchanging heat.
That’s wild. We’re all just little heat machines—
Amelia. Focus. You’re having a moment with your husband. Stop thinking about thermodynamics.
Right. Moment. Husband. Romance.
His fingers tighten slightly, and I feel the restraint thrumming in him. I press my hand to his chest, right over his heart. It’s thundering. Mine is too.
We just sit like that. Him holding me. Me trying not to cry again. And for the first time today, I feel like I can breathe.
Finally, Gage runs a finger along my jaw and says, “You look beautiful.”
The laugh that bursts out of me is equal parts overwhelm and disbelief. “Are you blind? I must have mascara smeared all over my face with the amount of crying you caused. The next time you decide to make me a fairy wonderland, give me a heads up to not bother with makeup.”
He doesn’t respond straight away. Just watches me with heat.
Then, he ruins me all over again when he says, “Consider me seduced. Again. Still. Always.”
“Oh my god, Gage. You cannot say that to me when I’m still high and emotionally unstable.” My eyes widen. “And when I have my period!” I gesture wildly at him. “You can’t be this hot and this romantic . . . I feel like I’m in heat with zero options. You’re basically edging me.”
He’s unrepentant, and his voice is filthy-soft when he says, “That’s your rule. Not mine.” His thumb glides over my hip. “I’ll always wait. But don’t think for one second I’m not hard just looking at you.”
I swear under my breath. I want to throttle him. I want to fuck him. I want to rewrite every rule I’ve ever made.
“You’re a menace,” I grumble.
“You knew what you were getting into when you said yes to me.” He leans in and wrecks me with a kiss that doesn’t even try to behave. “Now you get to live with the consequences.”
I roll my eyes, but there’s no heat behind it. I’m too in love with this man to mean it.
He chuckles, then reaches into his pocket and pulls something out. It’s a coin.
I frown. “What’s that?”
He doesn’t answer right away. Just keeps his gaze on the coin while he turns it between his fingers.
“I’ve been thinking,” he says finally, lifting his eyes to mine. “About us. About forever.”
The gruff tone in his voice catches all of my attention.
“I know who I am, Amelia. I know I’m not easy.
I can be arrogant. I dig in when I should back down.
I lead with control when I should lead with trust. And when I feel fear, I grip tighter and try to manage.
” His gaze is intense, locked to mine. “I almost lost you once because of that, and I’m doing everything I can not to make that mistake again. But still, I know myself.”
He pauses. And when he speaks again, it’s quieter. Thicker. Full of raw, unfiltered emotion. “If I ever lose you, it won’t be because I didn’t love you enough. It'll be because I didn’t shut up long enough to hear you.”
My eyes sting. Hard.
Gage slides the coin into my palm and closes my fingers around it.
“This is for the days I’m being an arrogant dick and don’t realize it.
For the moments when we’ve gone back and forth five times about something stupid and you’re about to kill me.
Or when I start trying to fix things for you even though you never asked me to do that.
Or when I start trying to manage things because I’m afraid of losing you. ”
He rubs his thumb gently over my hand that’s holding the coin. “When you need to be heard but don’t want to fight, this is what you pull out. This is how you remind me.”
I open my hand and stare at the coin. It’s gold. Simple. Both sides are engraved.
Heads: Amelia wins.
Tails: Try again.
I will never forget this moment. The moment my heart tried to explode out of my chest. The moment I realized Gage didn’t just make me feel safe, he built a system to ensure it. The moment I knew I’d always be able to reach him, even when words failed.
My tears start up again and I don’t even bother trying to stop them. I just let them fall as I put my arms around his neck and kiss him.
“I can’t even function right now,” I sob.
“You built me a path and a glasshouse. You told me to brand you. And ruined my makeup. You gave me a coin—” I look at it again “—a coin that’s the most beautiful object I’ve ever seen.
How is a coin this beautiful? I didn’t know coins could be so beautiful.
” I trace the engraving with my finger. “This is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me and it weighs like nothing but also it weighs everything, you know?
“I’m bleeding and high and so emotionally compromised I think I’ve married an actual wizard.
” I’m doing a weird laugh-cry as I add, “I love you, Gage. Like, stupidly. Like, I’m pretty sure I’d bury a body for you if you asked.
” I blink. “I didn’t mean that. I mean, I did. But I’m high. So it doesn’t count.”
His arm tightens around me. “Ready to commit felonies for me? That’s my fucking wife.”
“I mean, don’t give me a body. But I’d do it. No questions. I’d hold the flashlight and everything.”
Gage chuckles. “Fuck, I love you.”
I’m in the middle of thinking about burying bodies for him when my phone pings with a text.
Tim
THE PRESENT! Do not forget the damn present. I didn’t wrap it for you for nothing.
Shit. I had forgotten.
I shift in Gage’s lap. “Okay, so I have something for you, too.”
I reach into my bra and pull out a tiny black velvet pouch. “It’s not a wizard greenhouse or a thousand candles, but it’s heartfelt. And also warm from my boobs, so.”
His lips twitch.
“I put it there for safekeeping. My bra is very trustworthy. Secure storage.” I place the gift into his hand. “You’re welcome.”
He opens the pouch, his fingers pausing when he pulls out the elegant matte black cufflinks. Then when he sees the engraving, he goes still.
Each cufflink has different coordinates engraved on it.
“What are these?” His voice is low. My husband knows he’s about to feel all his feelings.
I point to one of the cufflinks. “This is your condo.”
He looks at me and waits.
“That’s where you let me go,” I say quietly.
“When I took off my collar, you didn’t argue with me.
You didn’t gaslight me. You didn’t rage or punish or manipulate.
You just listened and let me make my own choice.
” I take a moment to get my words right.
“I will never forget that, Gage. I know it broke you, but it was the most sacred kind of love I have ever experienced. It made everything we have now possible.”
His jaw flexes hard as his thumb runs over the numbers.
I touch his chest. “The other one is here. Blackbriar. Where you gave me forever.”
His eyes close for a second. Then he pulls me in like he needs to be skin-to-skin to stay conscious.
I go willingly. Obviously. Because this man built me a fairytale forest and told me to brand him. And now he’s holding cufflinks I kept in my bra like a lunatic. And I’ve never been more in love.
Gage stares down at the cufflinks for the longest moment. When he finally speaks, his voice is guttural. “I would’ve waited forever for you.”
My heart does that exploding thing again.
But he’s not done.
He closes his fist around the cufflinks. “And I’ll always be here. When we fight. When you can’t stand me. When you try to push me away. You’re it for me, Amelia. You’ll always be it.”
I swear, I will never get over the way he says things like that.
I lean in and press a kiss to his lips. “Thank you for loving me so well. For choosing me every single day. I will never stop choosing you back.” I spend a moment just looking at him.
Taking in this man who is the very best man I know.
And who I love with my entire soul. “I will never let you forget that you’re it for me too. ”