Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
I sneak into my house, so I don’t disturb Roxy because she probably didn’t come home until the wee hours of the morning. Most bartenders don’t get out until well after two.
I haven’t known her long, but I feel like I’ve known her forever. I’m sure that’s why Chris and Trevor thought she’d be a good fit. She seems to have summed me up in the few times we have hung out.
It takes several trips between my car and the closet to get everything put away, but I finally have it all shoved back in its original home. The coffeepot is calling to me from the kitchen, and even though I shouldn’t be drinking so much caffeine, I put a pot on to brew and sit down at the table with nothing else to do but wait.
What am I going to do about Anthony? I decided that I will show up to dinner with the pictures so when I can’t talk to him, I can at least show him what I know.
A rustle to my left makes me jump. I was so caught up in my thoughts and I didn’t hear Roxy enter the kitchen area.
“Good morning. I hope I didn’t wake you.” I watch as she walks over to the pot and pours herself a cup .
“Thanks for making the coffee. Do you want some?” She pulls a second cup out of the cupboard and waits for my answer.
“Yeah, that would be great. Black is fine for me.”
“I know you don’t know me that well, but do you want to talk? You have yo-yoed several times between houses lately, and I think maybe you might want a sounding board.”
I stare at her for a minute. I’d rather talk to Kat because she knows me and my history. Since talking to Kat is out of the question, I’m happy to speak to Roxy. My computer is in the living room, where I left it when I arrived. Retrieving it and sitting back down at the table, I open the email with the photos. She shifts her chair to see the screen more easily and scrolls through the pics.
“You moved out because he was talking to another redhead some slimy paparazzi happened to conveniently take a picture of. Are you crazy? Did you even ask him about it?”
I’m shocked by her dismissal of his blatant disrespect for our relationship. “I asked him, and he breezed over the subject and disregarded the question outright.”
“Anthony is not the cheating kind of guy. He’s the commitment kind of guy,” she blurts out and then looks at me like a deer caught in the headlights.
“Why is it you know so much about my boyfriend? You have slipped several times about what a good guy he is… blah, blah, blah. Tell me what I don’t know, Roxy.” I cross my hands over my chest and stare her down. She shifts uncomfortably in her seat before she speaks.
“First off, I want you to know I didn’t know you were dating him when I moved in. I knew Katarina was connected to Ahz through Damon, but I thought you were connected through Katarina. I didn’t know both of you were dating Los Angeles’ most eligible bachelors.” She sips her coffee and sits back in her chair.
“Go on. Tell me what I need to know.” I feel like I’m going to be blindsided. Will she tell me she had a relationship with him? Does she know something that will help me work through my decision? Not only do I have an entire relationship to consider, but I also can’t forget I may be carrying his child. What do I plan to do about that?
“I know Anthony. I’ve known him for years. He was engaged to my sister.”
My heart squeezes at the mention of him being engaged. I feel like the ground just dropped out from under me. I grab for the table and hold on while the earth gobbles me up. He has never mentioned a former fiancée. He’s never talked about any relationship. I just assumed he was like me, either a serial dater or too busy to date at all.
“Forgive me for being speechless, but I’ve never heard of a long-term relationship, not to mention a fiancée. Herein lies my problem: it’s not the girl in the photos I’m concerned about; it’s the sneaking around. He’s supposed to be in Dallas, and yet, here he is at a hotel in Phoenix.” I scroll back to the picture of him walking into the Royal Palm Resort.
“It’s not my place to tell you Anthony’s business, but I’m going to because I think you need to hear it.” She scoots her chair closer to the table and closes my computer. I’m assuming she wants my full attention.
“Okay, I’m all yours.” I lean back in my chair and get comfortable.
“Seven years ago, Anthony and Roseanne met at one of Damon’s clubs. They both hit it off, and things went swimmingly well for a couple of years. Before I go into that, though, you have to get a good feel for my family. I told you my dad wanted boys to take over the firm. He had three girls. Imagine his disappointment when his oldest started dating a chef. Anthony had done well by then. He had a few restaurants, but nothing like the world domination of fine dining he has today. I think it was the situation with my sister that forced him to step up his game.”
Roxy picks up our cups and walks to the coffeepot to refill them both. She sets mine in front of me and retakes her position next to me.
“My dad was an enormous influence in her decision to break his heart. He wanted all of us to marry his partners if we weren’t going into law ourselves. Roseanne studied law, but she wasn’t interested in being a partner. She liked the prestige of the degree but had an adverse reaction to working.”
“What happened that broke Anthony’s heart?” I’m completely caught up in her tale. I’m learning something about Anthony he didn’t opt to share about himself. I kind of feel like a voyeur, looking through a private window in his life.
“We grew up very privileged children. Money was never an issue, and we never really heard the word no. Our parents had their thumb over us regarding careers and coupling, but everything else was fair game. We learned to live a life of excess, having closets full of Louboutin shoes and couture dresses. Anthony proposed to Roseanne on the second anniversary of their first date. He’s romantic that way. He pays attention to the details.” She pauses for a moment, and I take that time to gain my bearings. I don’t enjoy hearing about him almost marrying someone else.
“Roseanne said yes. She was listening to her heart. Unfortunately, she had to listen to my father, and his voice spoke louder than Anthony’s words of love. My dad reminded her that she lived the life of a princess. There was no way a chef was going to keep her in the lifestyle she was accustomed to. It didn’t matter he had many locations already open; he’d need to make millions to compete with the picture my dad painted. In the end, my sister chose money and status over love.”
I feel a tear slide down my cheek. I can picture Anthony’s face as she broke his heart. I brush the stray tear away and tell her to go on.
“My sister walked into his restaurant the next day and handed him back his ring. Two weeks later, she married a partner from the law firm. The message to Anthony was, you’re not good enough or rich enough to hold on to me . He begged her to come back but gave up when the wedding photo hit front and center of the Los Angeles Times . I think he took his anger and aggression and applied them to making his millions.”
“What does your sister think now?” I am curious to know if she regrets throwing him over for a bigger fish.
“I don’t know because I don’t talk to my family. Knowing my sister, I’d imagine she thinks she chose poorly. If she’d just supported her man, she could’ve had it all. She seems happy enough. She gets the clothes and club memberships that are important to a woman who’s empty inside. I’m happy he didn’t marry her. He would’ve spent his entire life trying to please her and never succeeding.”
I think back to dinner with his parents. Claire mentioned he'd brought one girl home before me. They called her Rose. I bet the girl was Roseanne.
"That's awful. However, I don't know how this has anything to do with my situation. I'm not tossing him aside because he's not enough for me. I couldn't care less about money. I'm done because I don't want to be that girl who is oblivious to her boyfriend's philandering. I don't want the press writing stories about how I overlook his dishonesty and infidelity because he's rich. I wouldn't have cared if he lived in a beach house or a flophouse. I'd have loved him, anyway." My eyes burn with the unshed tears I'm suppressing.
"All I'm saying is this, I haven't seen Anthony for many years, but I believe I know who he is. I don't think he's cheating on you, and if he's lying, it's for a reason he will reveal when he thinks the timing is right. He's not a deceptive man; he's a man who loves completely. If he's in love with you, there will be no room for anyone else."
I stare at Roxy for a minute and wonder if I just made a huge mistake. Am I finding him guilty before he even gets his trial? I'm so confused, and my feelings are so conflicted. I hug Roxy for taking the time to talk to me. I know it wasn't easy for her to tell me a story that wasn't hers to share, but I'm glad she did. I stand up and hug her again and then plod slowly to my room. I feel both emotionally and physically drained.
The pattern on the ceiling seems to change the longer I look at it. I have so much to consider. I rub my stomach and think about the little Anthony that could be growing inside my belly. Am I prepared to be a single parent? Am I prepared to end a pregnancy? The thought of aborting my baby makes me sick to my stomach. If there is a baby, they didn't ask for the parents they got; it's just the luck of the draw. I contemplate that thought for a minute. I, of all people, know you should never blame a child for conditions surrounding their birth.
At that moment, I realize if I'm pregnant, I will have this baby. I will love this child as my mother loved me, albeit I hope to live to old age to watch my child grow. I feel a huge weight lift off my chest. I know Anthony would be a great father, and even though we wouldn't be together, we'd co-parent perfectly. He is a good man, despite what we're going through.
My palms are sweaty, slipping slightly from the steering wheel as I turn into the parking garage at Ahz. The table should be set for tonight. The staff is always happy to accommodate you when you're dining with the owner. I slide my car into a spot in the first aisle and walk toward the entrance. I'm a messy mix of emotions right now.
Anthony asked me to wear something sexy, but since this is not the reunion he expects, I am wearing a pair of jeans and an off-the-shoulder purple tunic. I meander my way through the restaurant and into the private dining room. My watch shows it's six thirty. He should be here any minute. I almost get to the table when I hear the door open behind me.
My heart is in my throat.
He stands before me in a beautifully tailored suit, his five o' clock shadow giving him a rugged, scruffy GQ look. His blue eyes light up when he sees me, and I watch as he drops the briefcase from his hand and makes a beeline for me.
The air pushes from my lungs as he embraces me a bit too hard. His lips crush against my mouth, and for a moment, I almost forget why I'm here. I push against his chest, breaking the connection, and immediately say, "We need to talk."
His eyes open in surprise and disappointment washes over his face. He looks at me cautiously.
"Have a seat. I ordered us dinner. I hope you don't mind. I figured you'd be hungry when you arrived." He pulls out my chair and takes a seat beside me without saying a word. I look at his face and see the confusion in his eyes.
"I missed you. I'm so happy I'm home. I was lonely without you." He stares at me. I look into his eyes and see the fear. Is it fear of being caught, or fear that something significant has just happened and he hasn't a clue?
"I missed you, too. I think the reporter from the Times thought I was missing you as well. He sent me a bunch of photos, just in case I needed an Anthony fix. Sadly, you weren't missing me as much as I'd hoped. I had no idea how much it would hurt me to see you with another woman, but it destroyed me."
I grab my phone from my purse and set it on the table. I pull up the photos and put them to show as a slideshow. Picture after picture pops up. He seems surprised but doesn't jump to defend himself.
"It's not what you think it is. I'm not cheating on you." His voice is calm and almost monotone.
"It looks pretty cut-and-dried. She was with you almost every day you were gone. How long have you known her?" I can almost forgive a weak moment. He'd left on the heels of a major fight. Has he known her for a long time? Maybe it's me who's the other girl. I can't forgive him if she has been in his life for a while and he never told me. "Is she gone forever, or will I have to worry about her?" What am I saying? He was with another woman. My question might lead him to believe we're still a couple, which is not the case.
"She's going to be around for a while, I think." A small smile emerges from his lips.
"You're a son of a bitch! How can you profess your love to me and then hook up with some young redheaded whore willing to spread her legs for you?" The accusation spills out of my mouth quickly.
I watch his lip twitch as he vacillates between laughter and anger. Anger finally wins.
"Damn it, Emma! You decided I was guilty, and now you're making me hang for a crime I didn't commit. Everything I do is because I love you."
"You love me so much you have to leave my arms and fall into the embrace of another woman who happens to resemble me. You know, I could get over the girl. It wouldn't be easy, but I could. I can't get over you lying to me about where you were. The entire time you were gone, you told me you were in Dallas, and yet there you are, walking into a luxury hotel in Phoenix. Is this where you slept with her? Did she travel with you? I bet you had a fabulous time." My face is hot from my fury.
He growls in frustration and combs his hands through his hair. "I'm done, Emma. I have loved no one as I love you, but I can't love someone who doesn't trust me. You've had one foot in and one foot out of the door since we met. When you decide you want to commit yourself to a relationship, let me know. I may still be around and have a small bit of love left in my heart for you. But until then, stay the hell away from me."
He pushes away from the table with such force, the water glasses tumble over and spill onto the floor. I'm left in shock. Somehow I'm to blame for his lack of integrity and inability to keep his junk in his pants.
"I can't let you leave without telling you I might be pregnant." I watch as the anger leaves his body. He stares at me. "I have an appointment on Monday morning to pick up my results." My eyes lower, so I can't see his face. I don't want to see how he feels about this news or see him look at me with hatred.
He bends over to pick up his bag, reaches, in and pulls out a manila envelope. He stalks toward me like a bull running at a matador. Slamming the parcel down on the table, he turns to leave.
"Text me the address of your physician. I have a right to be there." He storms out without another word.
I sit in silence, looking at the wet tablecloth and overturned glasses. The perfect table setting is in shambles, just like my life.