Chapter 25
TWENTY-FIVE
“You know he’s called and texted Ryan, like, five hundred times since he landed back in the states, right?” JoJo asked after putting down the curling iron.
My hair was in full-on model mode with my shiny, blonde waves falling gracefully just beneath my shoulders. But it didn’t really matter what I looked like. No matter how beautiful or sexy I looked tonight, it wasn’t enough to stop the dread from creeping over my shoulders.
The growing worry about seeing Luke tonight had me contemplating just moving away from New Bern altogether. That way, I’d never have to face him again. Let alone be his neighbor!
I spun around in my chair. “And what has Ryan been telling him?”
JoJo smirked. “He told him you weren’t here, obviously. But I’m really surprised Luke hasn’t come here to bang the door down yet. Where else would you be?”
I half-laughed.
“Why hasn’t he called you? ”
I let out a long breath. “I blocked his number right after I deleted my email.”
JoJo formed an “O” with her mouth and then nodded in understanding.
“Do you think this is a good idea?”
Nervousness washed over me. It felt strange for me to be so vulnerable.
I had never been the pitiful, eat-a-pint-of-ice-cream-because-a-boy-broke-my-heart type of girl.
I’d never been like that, not even in high school.
I would just deal on my own and move on, burying myself in work until the next thing came along. But with Luke…it was different.
And I hated that.
“I think it’s a great idea. You have to face him sometime, and plus…
” JoJo walked swiftly over to her closet and pulled out a light-blue dress with very thin, delicate straps that crisscrossed in the back.
It was beautiful and simple, so it wouldn’t look like I was trying too hard.
“He’ll die when he sees you in this.” An evil grin formed on her face, and I blew out a huge breath.
In the middle of stripping down and pulling the dress over my head, JoJo asked through the bathroom door what I was planning to do once I got to the party.
I said matter-of-factly, “I’m going to find the hottest man there and bang him right in front of Luke.” Okay, that was highly unlikely, but a girl could dream.
Her groan was full of disgust. “I’d advise maybe just kissing the hottest guy there. Let’s draw the line at flashing everyone your boobs and vagina.”
I snickered. “Fine.”
But my only thought was, “What happens when Luke is the hottest guy there? ”
The party was in full swing when Ryan pulled the car around with JoJo and me smooshed in the back. He said he felt like our chauffeur, and that was exactly what we told him he was. It was a good thing he was madly in love with JoJo, or else he’d probably kill us both.
This coming-home party was the type I was used to: loud music, people all over the place, yelling and being totally rambunctious, playing drinking games and taking shots. Marines knew how to party; I learned that at a very young age when my own parents would throw parties similar to this one.
My heeled ankle boots felt wiggly on my feet as JoJo and I walked with our arms interlocked, trailing behind Ryan, who was nodding at all his friends.
The Marine Corps was such a small, family-like community.
It was quite possible that Ryan knew almost every single person there, even the ones who weren’t from his actual company.
I squeezed my eyes shut right before we walked in the front door, trying to bring myself off the ledge that I was about to jump off of.
The amount of anxiety swarming my body was suffocating.
I still knew nothing about Luke and his wife.
I’d pestered Ryan, but he professed to know nothing about Luke being married, and when he had asked around, no one really mustered up anything juicy.
I wished I knew. I wished I had some indication of what he was going to say to me when we finally met in person again.
Did he try to email me and realize that I’d deleted it because I didn’t trust myself to fall into another lie of omission?
Did he try to write me a letter? I went days without checking my mail, afraid he would write me something and that I wouldn’t have the willpower to throw it out.
I never got a letter, though, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not .
“Want a drink?” JoJo yelled in my ear over the loud music, bringing me back to reality.
“God, yes,” I answered. I needed something to still my trembling hands.
I looked around the room cautiously, smiling at familiar faces here and there. I spotted Daniel, with his wide and infectious smile, across the room and gave him a tiny wave. I recognized a few friends from high school, along with a few of our closer friends, but I didn’t see Luke anywhere.
A sudden fear washed over me that he wouldn’t come tonight, and then, when I did go back to my house later on, he would be there. Waiting for me. And I’d be all alone without backup.
JoJo handed me a beer, and the second I put it up to my lips, I gulped the entire thing. I chugged it. It would have been the cherry on top if I’d smashed the can against my forehead and then everyone applauded for me.
“Jesus, Cam. Calm down.” Ryan laughed, and I shrugged my shoulders innocently. At least the buzz of the beer would help me relax.
I hope.
Too bad I hadn’t swallowed the beer twenty minutes ago, because the second I set the empty can onto a nearby table… in walked Luke.
Looking better than ever.
I froze in my spot, my hand still mid-air from releasing my can. JoJo stepped in front of me, partially shielding me from Luke, but his gaze never even touched her. His light eyes stayed trained on me.
They looked lighter than before. They appeared so much more vivid against the color of his darkened skin.
The Afghanistan sun had done him wonders.
His body looked leaner, too. His T-shirt was pulled tightly around his biceps but hung loosely around his waist. That sandy-blond hair of his was cut shorter on the sides than normal, a sure sign that he’d just gotten back from deployment.
His smoldering look did something to me. I no longer felt unequipped to hash this out with him, right here, right now. I felt bold and prepared. The light-blue dress was my armor, and I was ready to knock him on his ass.
I squared my shoulders and put my hands on my hips, keeping my face even and steady. He stalked toward me, and it was like Moses parting the Red Sea. People moved within seconds, providing a straight path right down the middle of the room.
JoJo turned her head over her shoulder and looked at me. “Want me to move?”
I didn’t even meet her eyes. “Yep.”
He was in front of me within seconds. His eyes searched my face, and he looked like he was huffing and puffing.
I wasn’t going to be the first to speak. No fucking way.
“Cammie.” His voice was like the aloe to my burn, which was ironic, considering he was the one who burned me to begin with.
“Luke.” My voice was even steadier than my face.
“We need to talk.”
I smiled. “Go right ahead. I’m all ears.”
He looked around, pleading with me. “Not here. Let’s go somewhere else.”
I also looked around. People were trying to pretend like they were wrapped up in their own conversations, but I knew better. They were rubbernecking without the actual rubbernecking part.
“Nope. I like it right here.”
JoJo and Ryan scooted a little farther back, and I kind of felt like Luke and I were about to throw down. Just toss the pair of us into a fighting ring and it’d be a damn good show.
He crossed his arms and growled. “Fine.” I raised my eyebrows, maintaining my strong facade.
“Ash was my wife.” He paused. “I had been waiting for the divorce papers for months . She finally signed them a few weeks after I left, after my lawyer informed her that I was about to sue her.” His eyes darkened a bit. “You would have known that if you hadn’t deleted your fucking email.”
I was appalled. How dare he act angry with me! I clenched my teeth tightly together, grinding my molars back and forth. “That doesn’t change a single thing, Luke.”
His expression baffled me, several different emotions all coming together to form what seemed like an even-tempered face in the end.
“What? Why doesn’t that change anything, Cammie? I’m not married anymore!” he shouted, and now people really were looking.
I felt my heart cringe, reminding me that it was this extremely fragile, little thing in my chest that truly hurt.
“The key word is… anymore.” I walked closer to him and pushed my right index finger into his chest. “You made me the other woman… and you lied to me.”
He looked down at my finger and tried to grab my hand. I pulled it away fast.
“I didn’t lie to you!”
My mouth gaped. “Are you really that dense? Not telling me you were legally married—to a very pregnant woman, I might add—and then…” I stopped for a beat, looking around at our audience. “Well, you know the rest! That’s pretty damn close to lying, Lucas.”
His shoulders slumped. “It’s not my baby, Cammie.”
“I don’t care. You’re not who I thought you were.” I stormed past him and walked to the front door, holding it open. His brows furrowed when he found me standing there.
“Either you leave, or I do,” I shouted over the music.
He straightened his shoulders. “I’m not leaving without you.”
My breathing felt shallow, but my body was hyped on adrenaline.
“Fine. Bye.” I turned around on my heeled boots and marched myself down the tree-lined street. A gust of wind flew through the night air, rustling the leaves around me. I crossed my arms over my body, holding back a shiver.
He thought this was another one of our games.
But he was wrong.
This wasn’t a game anymore, because I’d already lost.