Chapter 17
17
Gage
She didn’t show.
She sent her fucking brother.
No text. No call. Nothing.
She has a hell of a lot to learn about me because I am not a man who walks away from what I want. Amelia does not get to look at me the way she does, kiss me like that, and then run. Not without facing me.
After I put Luna to bed on Saturday night, I leave Shirley with her, and I go to Amelia. It’s late. Nine thirty. But I don’t care if she’s already asleep, we’re having a conversation.
Her doorman calls her when I arrive, and I’m already prepared to fight my fucking way up there if she says no. But she doesn’t. She lets me in. And when the elevator doors slide open into her condo, she’s standing there barefoot, wide-eyed, and looking at me like she had no idea I’d show up here tonight. Like she thought I’d just let this slide.
I step out of the elevator, every muscle in my body pulled tight, every part of me on edge.
“Gage,” she starts, but I cut her off.
“You blew me off.” I move into her, invade her space. “Without so much as a text.”
Her long lashes blink up at me and I see her brain spinning. I’m too close for her comfort, but she’s going to have to deal with that tonight. I’m done giving her space.
Her hands come to my stomach and I fucking wish they were doing that for a different reason, but I rein my focus in, keeping it fixed on why I came here.
“I’m sorry. I?—”
“No. Don’t be sorry, Amelia. Be fucking anything but that. Be honest with me. Tell me why.”
She flinches at my hard edge and I’m not sure if I’m going to get the realness from her that I’m desperate for, that I’ve fallen hard for. Because it looks a hell of a lot like she’s about to cut and run, and try like fuck to never come back.
“You kissed me last weekend like you wanted me to ruin you,” I say, pushing harder than I intend, but fuck , I’m barely keeping my shit together right now. “You want this. You want me . But I could see you were running scared, so I gave you space. Didn’t force anything. Hell, I refused to fuck you because I knew you weren’t ready.” My shoulders tense as I try to find the edge of whatever the fuck this feeling is. “Tell me what you need from me that’ll help you give this a chance.”
Her breaths are coming faster now, and when she speaks, I hear her breathlessness. “I told you my fears, Gage. I’ve been honest with you.”
I clench my jaw. “No. You’ve given me your reason, not your honesty. You’re using Sarah to keep yourself safe. But you look at me like you’re thinking about me just as much as I’m thinking about you. I want you to admit you’re lying to yourself.”
Her eyes flare wide, and she steps back. “If you’re going to come here and?—”
My hand’s around her waist and I’m backing her up against the wall before she can finish that sentence. My other hand slides along her jaw. “I’m not giving you an easy out. Not anymore. Tell me you want me. Just say the words. That’s all I need.”
I’ve bewildered her, which wasn’t my intention when I came here, but fuck if it doesn’t get her talking.
She grips my shirt, her entire being so fucking beautifully alive, her eyes blazing with heat like never before. “Yes, I want you! I’ve never wanted a man so fucking much. I think about you all day, every day. I can’t get you out of my head. When you text me, I can’t read it fast enough. When I see you, I can’t take my eyes off you. When I talk to you, I hang off every word. Even when I want to tear a smirk from your face, I want so many more of them from you.”
Fuck .
My mouth crashes down onto hers, my hands tighten their hold on her, and I kiss her so fucking thoroughly, losing my mind, my good sense, my fucking everything. Amelia has me caught in her web and no idea of just what I’d do to make her mine.
I tear my mouth from hers. “The next time you get scared, you come to me. You give me that. Your honesty. Give me anything but your absence. Anything . Tell me emojis make no fucking sense to you. Tell me you need another year to think about having dinner with me. Tell me about your goddamn laundry piling up. Just don’t ever not show up again.”
She lets me get all of that out, listening to every word I say. Then she’s got her hands up around my neck, and she’s pulling my mouth back to hers. She grips my face with both hands while she kisses me again, and I realize I may not survive this woman.
I want to be the man who gets past all her defenses. Who knows what makes her laugh when no one’s around. Who gets the unfiltered version of her no one else gets.
And fuck me, I want her to kiss me like this forever.
Her hands come to my coat, shoving it off my shoulders. Then she’s tugging at my sweater, desperate to get it over my head.
When she starts on my belt, I break the kiss, my breath ragged, and lock eyes with her. “We’re only doing this if you’re going to give me more.”
There’s not one ounce of hesitation from her when she says, “Yes.” Then, she slows herself down and gives me what I need. That realness I’ve known from no other woman. “I’m terrified, Gage. Terrified of you hurting me. Of us screwing this up and harming our kids’ friendship. Of so many things I’ve lost track. But I’m tired of living in that fear. I want more than just getting through the day. I want to live. Really live. I want to let things get messy.” She bites her lip, and it hits my veins like a goddamn drug. “And I want to do that with you.”
“Fuck,” I growl, lifting her into my arms. “Where’s your bedroom?”
She directs me down the hall, and the second I step into her room, I feel it. Her. Everywhere. It’s elegant and feminine, but not pristine like I expected. There’s a sweater tossed over a chair, heels kicked half under the bed, books piled in uneven stacks beside it like she was halfway through five of them at once.
I’m immediately back in her hotel suite in Nashville, remembering the mess of it. This is the same woman. The one who keeps everything together until it all spills out.
I set her down, and in the short walk here, something’s shifted. Amelia’s still with me. All in. But there’s a flicker of hesitation in her eyes now. Not shyness. Just that first-time pause. Like it’s hit her this is really happening.
I move in, gently smoothing her hair back from her face. My other hand finds her neck, and I bend to kiss her, slow at first, then deeper as I feel her body curve into mine.
When I pull back, I murmur, “We can go slower.”
“I don’t want to,” she says, softly. “I just haven’t had sex in over a year.”
I nod, brushing my thumb across her skin. “Then we take our time.”
She loops her arms around my neck and moves in with the kind of hungry certainty that sets my blood on fire. “I don’t think that’s possible with you,” she says, her mouth ghosting over mine. “I want you too much.”
“Jesus,” I rasp. “You have no idea what you do to me.” I kiss her neck just below her ear. When I catch the scent of her perfume, I graze my nose along her skin, scenting her, and it fucks with my restraint. “I’m trying to go slow, Amelia, but you’re gonna have to help me do that.”
She’s already back at my belt. “I don’t want you to go slow.” She pops the button of my pants, lowers the zipper. “I want you to absolutely ruin me.”
And that’s it.
I finally lose my mind completely.
Every bit of restraint I was clinging to. Gone.
I’ve got her in my arms and then on the bed, and I’m prowling over her, my eyes on her body. That pink tank she’s wearing that clings to every curve and dips low at the neckline has been testing my patience since the second I saw it. I reach for the hem and slide it up, revealing bare skin. No bra. And fuck, her breasts are full, soft, and I’m going to need a long fucking time with them.
Once I’ve got her top off, I suck one of her nipples into my mouth, groaning against her skin as my hands finally close over her tits.
“ Gage ,” she breathes, her hands coming straight to my biceps.
“You like that?” I rasp, licking slowly over her nipple, then sucking it back between my teeth.
“Yes.”
Fuck .
Her voice.
The moan in that one word.
It takes me to my edge.
I want to spend hours learning Amelia’s body, but I’m not sure I have it in me to be anything but selfish and just take what I want first.
Not when she speaks to me like that.
I make myself slow down, but it’s a fight the whole way.
I shift to her other nipple while palming her breast, giving her just enough teeth to make her rock her hips against me in a shameless way I really fucking like.
Her fingers tangle in my hair. They pull hard when I bite her, and it goes straight to my dick. I lift my head and find her eyes, needing that connection. Needing to see what I do to her.
Holding her gaze, I move down her body, my hands reaching for her pajama pants. I remove them, still watching her. And then, I drop my gaze, and am met with the sexiest, lacy panties. Pink. Just like her pajamas.
I run a finger over the fabric, finding her clit. I look at her again as I rub it. “You’re fucking soaked.”
She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth as she grinds herself against my hand. “You do have that effect on a woman.”
Christ .
I thought she’d already made me lose my mind. I was nowhere close. And when she drops her gaze to watch my fingers, all slow and hungry, I know she’s got more in her arsenal. That mouth might beg pretty, but her body? It came here to wreck me.
I slide her panties down her legs and then I spread those legs. My eyes go back to hers as I settle in to make a goddamn mess. Ruin her pretty little mind. Drag every filthy sound she’s got from that sinful mouth.
We watch each other as I lick her pussy one end to the other. I circle my tongue over her clit, sucking it in, and fucking worshipping it.
Over and over.
I bury my face in her and eat her out until she’s riding my mouth and using me like she owns me. Her thighs clamp around my head and she fists the sheet with one hand while the other grabs the back of my head and keeps me there.
“Right there . . . right fucking there ,” she pants.
Jesus Christ, I’d live between her legs if she let me.
I groan against her, sucking harder, and do my best to send her over the edge.
She moans louder, her hips jerking up, her grip in my hair turning desperate. “Gage... oh my god...”
She comes apart, thighs shaking, breath catching. She soaks my beard, crying out my name.
I don’t stop. Not until she’s completely undone. Not until I’ve licked her clean. Not until I’ve made damn sure she knows exactly who did this to her.
When I finally lift my head, her chest is rising and falling fast. She’s breathless. Her fingers are still tangled in my hair. Her eyes are wild. And fuck me, she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
She smiles and brings her hands around to my face as she murmurs, “A whole-ass situation.”
I like her hands on my face. A fucking lot. Especially when it feels like she’s getting to know me with those hands.
“A situation you like.” I make my way up her body, kissing as I go, enjoying this slower pace for a moment.
“Probably too much,” she says when I reach her mouth, bruising her with a kiss.
“Good,” I growl, cupping her breast and tweaking the nipple. “We’re going to keep it that way.”
Her hands leave my face, moving around to the back of my neck, and then she’s pulling me in for another kiss. One that consumes me body and soul.
I’m losing myself to it when I feel her hands turn needy. One clutches my shoulder. The other slides down my back like she needs something to anchor her. And then she’s searching for friction, grinding herself up against me, wrapping a leg around me to get even closer.
She moans into my mouth and it’s one of the filthiest sounds I’ve heard. It’s so fucking impure it hits me square in the gut. And my need to be inside her turns feral.
She feels it too, the shift in me, and greedily shoves my pants down, just enough to get her hand on my dick. Still kissing me, she wraps her hand around me and strokes, and fuck .
My hips jerk and I break our kiss, breathing hard against her jaw, trying to hold the fuck on.
She grasps my face and angles my gaze up to meet hers. Then she fucking kills me when she deliberately looks down at my cock in her hand and uses my pre-cum as lube. The final nail in my coffin is when she slowly licks her bottom lip while keeping her eyes on my dick.
I’m seconds away from pinning her down and fucking the breath out of her when she says, “We need a condom.”
Yeah, we fucking do.
But first, I need my mouth on hers.
I grip her jaw roughly, my thumb dragging across her bottom lip before pulling her into a kiss that has zero mercy.
This mouth that just said we need a condom? I want it saying my name.
I want it gasping, begging, cursing me when I don’t stop.
I want it screaming when I finally fuck her hard enough to leave a mark.
She lets go of my cock, grabbing my neck with one hand and burying the other in my hair, kissing me like she’s falling apart from the inside out.
I keep hold of her jaw while I run my other hand down her body, in-fucking-delicately, until I’m palming her ass and pulling her leg around me.
I grind into her as I kiss her harder, deeper, dirtier. And all I can think is, this isn’t gonna be soft. And I’m not stopping until she forgets every man who came before me.
I break contact just long enough to find a condom in my wallet.
“I hope you’re ready,” I growl when I return. “You’re gonna take all of me, so fucking deep you’ll feel it for days.”
The look she gives me is all fuck-me eyes and I don’t bother with another warning. I slam my cock inside her. And goddamn . She’s tight, wet, and choking my dick like she’s trying to wring every last drop out of me.
She cries out the second I thrust inside her, back arching, nails digging into my shoulders. Her legs wrap around me, locking me in like her body’s decided I’m not fucking leaving.
I fuck into her as hard and deep as I promised, and Jesus, she’s not just taking it. She’s giving it right back. I find her eyes, and it’s right there, that look that says she wants this just as dirty as I’m giving it.
I don’t look away. If I’m going to fuck her like I own her, she’s going to look at me while I do it.
“You feel that?” I grit, slamming in to the base. “This cock’s yours, Amelia. I’ll fuck you like this every damn night.”
Her hands come to my face. Wild and rough. Claiming me. Demanding I kiss her, and heaven help me, I would give this woman whatever the fuck she wanted right now.
We find our rhythm and chase our release together, her hips rolling, matching every thrust I give. Her sounds get swallowed by my mouth, every moan mine to take. I can feel her getting close by the way she clamps around my cock like she’s trying to drag me down with her.
“You gonna come on my cock?” I rasp against her lips. “Because I’m right fucking there.”
She grips my biceps, her body goes taut beneath me, legs tightening, breath catching as her climax hits hard.
I thrust once more, driving all the way in, and the sound that tears from me as I come is raw and ragged, ripped out of me like it’s hers to take. Then, every muscle goes slack. I’m done. Emptied. Mind blank. It’s the kind of release that leaves nothing behind. Just heat, sweat, and the lingering ache of everything I just gave.
I stay inside her for a beat, catching my breath, not ready to let go of the feel of her around me. Then I force myself to move, bracing one hand beside her and slowly pulling out. I leave the bed to dispose of the condom in her bathroom and then come back to the bed, bringing her in close again.
We lie in silence, her skin warm and slick against mine, our breaths evening out.
Amelia’s the one to speak first. She slides her arm across my chest and presses herself into me. There’s a sexy smile in her voice when she says, “If I knew you fucked like that, I’d have begged for it sooner.”
Fuck .
My hand’s on her jaw and my mouth’s on hers before she takes another breath. This kiss is possessive and slow, all tongue and intent. One more claim on her, one more way to say mine without the word.
“If I’d known you had that much filth in your veins, I would’ve bossed you into bed the minute we met.”
Her smile grows, and when she tries to bring her body in closer to mine even though that’s impossible, I tighten my arm around her, and say, “I don’t think you can get any closer, but I fucking love that you’re trying.”
She curves a leg over mine and turns serious. “I know you don’t want my apologies for blowing you off today, but I am sorry. I’ve never done anything like that before.”
“What happened between you telling me you were looking forward to it and you not showing?”
She takes a moment before quietly saying, “James.”
I internally curse but keep my shit to myself.
“He texted me some nasty stuff last night and tried to shame me. I would have been okay if that was all he said, but he told me I was always easy to impress. And I was. He was right.” She swallows hard. “It messed with me. I started to worry I was doing the same thing all over again with you.”
If I ever get my hands on that fucking guy.
“You think I’ve easily impressed you?”
I see her brain working, then the second she gets it, then the blink of realization. “No,” she says softly.
“No is fucking right, Amelia,” I say a little more intensely than I mean to, but I need her to hear this. To know it deeply. “You spent a year thinking I was an asshole. Then, I helped you survive your period at the wedding. You still thought I was an asshole. Then, you showed up to our first science fair meeting and schooled me over hurting people’s feelings. You’ve challenged me every step of the way. You don’t let me get away with a thing.” I work my jaw, thinking about the way her ex manipulates her. “I had to push my way in and practically beg for a chance with you. James doesn’t know shit, and the next time he says stuff like that to you, I hope you tell him to fuck right off.”
She lets that all sink in for a long moment before saying, “I didn’t think you were an asshole.”
I arch a brow. “I distinctly recall the day you changed your mind on that.”
Her mouth quirks as she recalls the memory. “Okay, so maybe a little.”
“Right. So, can we agree that he’s wrong about you, and that you are not the kind of woman who easily lets a man in?”
“Yes, okay, you have a point.”
My mouth curves up at the way she’s struggling to give me this. “You’re fucking cute when you’re trying not to agree that I’m right.”
She rolls her eyes but lets me move in with a kiss.
“I want dinner tomorrow night,” I say once I’m finished with her mouth.
“So, this is the part where I get to see your idea of bossy, is it?”
“This is the part where I help you figure out dating again.”
“You are enjoying yourself far too much, I think. Just because I got drunk, and word vomited all my feelings about?—”
“Amelia.”
She blinks at my firm tone. Then says, “I can’t do dinner tomorrow night. I have Sarah.”
“Monday then.”
“I can do Monday.” A smile tugs at her lips. “I’d like that.” Her smile turns wicked. “Will you wear one of your sexy, hostile takeover outfits? I have preferences if you’re open to them.”
My lips twitch. “Am I to take it that tuxes are back on the list?”
She slides on top of me and straddles me, fucking slaying me all over again. “I mean, a tux for dinner might be overkill.” Her mouth grazes mine. “But if you wanna put one on and roleplay CEO, I’m your girl.”