Chapter 4 #2
Settling in next to the window, Miles unlocked his phone and dutifully looked through his messages.
Despite leaving behind a note and talking it out with his mom earlier in the day, every member of his family felt the need to share their opinion about his impromptu trip.
His dad sent a long message about the importance of taking accountability for one’s poor decisions—not directly accusing Miles of anything but making the subtext perfectly clear.
His youngest siblings, Micah and Misty, asked him to bring back some souvenirs and included a list of acceptable options.
Max thought the entire thing was hilarious, not bothering to assume the responsible-older-brother role.
Even Mara sent a message, though it consisted of nothing but fire and laughing emojis.
Hers was the only one he responded to, sending a thumbs-up. He’d deal with the rest of the family later.
Zach emerged from the bathroom, drying his shaggy hair with a towel.
Every time Miles saw him, it inched a little lower, brushing his shoulders at the last winter break and now falling right on his collarbone.
Zach’s parents hated it, taking every chance to complain about him looking like a hippie, but Miles always thought the long strands accentuated his sharp features and made him look otherworldly, like a beautiful forest elf from one of Micah’s video games.
Zach crossed the room in his boxers, stray water droplets glistening on his smooth chest, but instead of continuing toward the bed, he started rearranging the couch pillows. Miles watched him, trying to figure out what was going on.
“Whatcha doing?” he asked when Zach brought out a sheet and spread it over the cushions.
Zach pulled out his phone and tapped a few times. The light from the standing lamp in the corner dimmed, providing enough illumination to see his puzzled expression. “Getting ready for sleep?”
Miles’s confusion deepened as he glanced between Zach and the bed. “There’s plenty of space here, Zee. Why would you sleep on the couch?”
Suddenly, it clicked, and he mentally kicked himself. Sure, as children they’d always ended up shoulder to shoulder whenever they stayed over at each other’s houses, but those days were gone. And now that Zach had confided in him about being gay, things were even more complicated.
Something clenched in his chest at the thought of sleeping across the room from Zach. They were best friends, and to Miles, that meant nothing would ever change between them.
But it wasn’t his choice.
“Shit, Zee, I’m sorry.” He hopped out of bed and pulled the blanket Zach produced from the closet out of his hands. “I wasn’t trying to make it weird. I’ll take the couch.”
Zach held on and tugged back. “Don’t be silly. You’re my guest.” He paused, then furrowed his eyebrows and worried his lower lip between his teeth before cautiously asking, “Wait, how are you making it weird?”
Spelling it out made Miles’s neck heat with embarrassment, so he tried to hedge, “Well, you probably don’t want to sleep next to a man who…you know. Who you’re not sleeping with. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”
Zach hesitated for a split second before tackling Miles into a hug.
“Miles, no.” His words were muffled, his face buried in Miles’s neck, but there was no mistaking the laughter in his voice. “I didn’t want to make you feel weird.”
“Why would I?”
Zach pulled away and gave him an indecipherable look. His eyes were mesmerizing in the low light, the black of his pupils stark against the light gray backdrop.
“Most straight guys would feel weird about sharing a bed with a gay man.”
Miles wasn’t sure what to say. He understood Zach’s reticence now, but it was misplaced.
Their entire lives, he’d wanted nothing more than to be close to Zach, and that hadn’t changed.
It didn’t matter that Zach was gay. It didn’t matter that Miles’s parents would be horrified to find out their son was sleeping next to another man.
Nothing mattered except the lightness that buoyed him whenever they were together.
“Shut up and get in bed.”
They made themselves comfortable, fluffing up their pillows in unison and burrowing under the covers on opposite sides.
Miles held his breath, waiting until Zach’s hand traveled across the distance between them.
Warm satisfaction washed over him at the familiar gesture from their countless sleepovers, but something was still missing.
Tonight, it was not enough.
Miles rolled onto his side and wrapped his arm around Zach, pulling him closer until his back was pressed firmly against Miles’s chest.
Now, everything felt right. Zach’s small frame fit perfectly between Miles’s arms, as if they were two parts of the same mold. Miles kissed Zach’s hair and mumbled a soft “good night” into his ear, already falling asleep as the day finally caught up with him.
He woke at dawn. Even after three years at college, his body kept farm hours. No matter how late he stayed up studying, his brain compelled him to open his eyes as the sun hit the horizon.
He yawned, wishing he could sleep longer, and glanced around the room.
Everything was different. He wasn’t used to the light gray walls that surrounded him, and he certainly wasn’t used to the soothing weight of Zach’s limbs tangled with his.
In all the nights they’d shared a bed, it had never been like this—entwined, connected, and making Miles’s stomach flutter.
Pleasantly groggy, Miles tightened his hold on the man beside him, relishing the quiet warmth of being close to his favorite person.
It seemed that they’d stayed in the same position through the night, Zach’s back pressed against Miles’s chest, an unfamiliar intimacy that sent happiness coursing through his veins.
Zach mumbled and shifted in his sleep, the movement sparking an unexpected thrill.
Miles was suddenly acutely aware of his throbbing erection nestled against Zach’s firm ass.
Weird as it was to think of his best friend’s ass as firm, he couldn’t deny the electricity zinging up his spine as he ground his hips, dragging his cock along the taut curve.
A soft groan escaped, and he froze, horrified at what he’d just done.
Every muscle tense, he listened to Zach’s quiet breathing, relieved when its rhythm didn’t change as seconds ticked by. After barely convincing him to share a bed last night, Miles would have hated to ruin their arrangement with his wayward cock.
He disentangled from Zach, who showed no signs of waking up as Miles climbed over him and gracelessly slid off the bed with a loud thud.
Zach clearly didn’t observe farm hours.
After tiptoeing to the bathroom, he closed the door. There were barely fifteen feet between them, but this was the most privacy Miles could get without leaving the apartment. And he needed privacy. Clearly, it had been too long since he’d gotten off if he was humping his best friend.
Too impatient to wait, he shoved his hand into his boxers and wrapped it around the shaft before turning on the shower. When was the last time he’d been this turned on? He was rock-hard and leaking, already on the edge of an orgasm.
Pressing his lips together to prevent making noise, Miles fumbled out of his boxers and stepped into the shower, immediately sagging against the wall.
His eyes fluttered closed, a sigh escaping his lips as he slowly moved his hand up and down.
Pleasure surged through his veins, and goosebumps covered his skin despite the barrage of hot water.
Zach’s face flashed through his mind. The way his pupils dilated in the dark, the way he bit his plump lower lip in concentration until it was red, puffy, and glistening with his saliva. Miles had a sudden urge to taste it, to run his tongue along its soft, delicate flesh.
He groaned at the heat uncoiling in his stomach and slowed his movements, keeping the orgasm at bay. He wouldn’t let himself come to the thoughts of his best friend.
His gaze fell on Zach’s body wash, and he had the strangest urge to grab it and breathe it in.
What was happening to him? It seemed impossible to get his mind off Zach. He tried to think of hot girls from his classes, of porn, of anything else, but he couldn’t.
He didn’t want to.
Spreading his legs, he increased the pace and rolled his balls in the other hand.
Against his better judgment, he remembered how firm and luscious Zach’s ass had felt through layers of fabric.
Would it feel even more amazing with no barrier between, his cock grinding directly against Zach’s hot, silky skin?
The mental image was too much. He gasped as release slammed into him, taking his breath away.
White sticky ropes landed on his chest and stomach, immediately washing down the drain, erasing the evidence of his confusing thoughts.
His shoulders ached from leaning against the hard tile, but he stayed still for several minutes, panting as his heart rate slowly calmed.
Once his legs could finally support his weight, he turned off the water.
He had some soul-searching to do.