ZODIAC
The ride back to Baton Rouge left me feeling more like myself. I hadn’t really wanted to leave Elle. I nearly talked myself into staying for a few days. That witchy woman had turned me into a clingy baby.
The ride gave me a chance to sack up. I didn’t need anyone.
Sure, I cared about my club guys. They were loyal to me when the easier choice would have been to stick with Wrecker.
I would die for each of them. Loyalty deserved loyalty.
With that said, if they all died tomorrow, I would keep going.
I was a man built to ride alone at a moment’s notice.
That was how I survived bouncing between family members and foster homes since I was a toddler. I never expected anything to last, so I never became attached to anyone. Even when I was little, like Nova’s girls, I knew I was on my own.
Elle was great. She made me feel like no one else ever had, but I needed to get a grip. We could only work if we understood our limits. Little Memphis was a cool place, but Baton Rouge was my home. I had responsibilities that didn’t allow for playing house with Elle and her family.
As I rolled up to my apartment, I felt like myself. No more clingy shit. I was back in my element.
Walking into my apartment, I immediately lost my mojo.
The place seemed too quiet. Elle had marked my home with her presence.
I thought of her on the couch with me, watching sports and eating pizza.
In the kitchen, I saw her shuffling around in the morning when I had breakfast delivered.
The bedroom was nearly too much to face.
“Get over it,” I told myself before heading down to the clubhouse.
Those words usually fixed whatever was ailing me. I didn’t get lonely. I never suffered from depression. I kept my mind sharp through sheer willpower.
But fuck! I couldn’t shake missing Elle. Nothing special happened yesterday at her house. I was actually uncomfortable much of the time. I couldn’t speak freely. I felt under a microscope.
Heading down to the clubhouse, I still found myself wishing I were back at the Reed house. Inside the DTF Roadhouse, York sat at a back table. He was texting our local cops to get info about the fire. His dark eyes held a hint of annoyance.
Joining him at the table, I waited for him to finish up. “Well?” I asked when he set down his phone.
“The cops don’t have a fucking clue.”
“What’s your gut say?”
“If the Void wanted to make a move on Sabrina, why set a random fire near her hotel? Feels like a coincidence.”
“Good. I like the idea of the Void holding back.”
“Aren’t they just regrouping?”
“Sure, but we’ve got feelers out for Ryder’s location,” I said, mentioning Trigger’s youngest son.
After the former president of the Little Memphis Motorcycle Club was killed by Joker Curran, Ryder was allowed to leave town with his mom.
His family lost track of him in the decades that followed.
Though Ryder might be dead, Clint suspected Trigger’s son was the one gunning for Little Memphis.
“If we can find him, we can hit the Void’s inner circle. ”
“We don’t know if he’s involved.”
“Ryder driving the attacks on Little Memphis feels right,” I said and then admitted, “But I also know I’m compromised. I have a vested interest in a neutered Void. Not only for the club, but to keep Elle safe.”
Tapping the table, he asked, “That’s a real thing, huh?”
“She stunk up my bedroom with her lady scent, so, yeah.”
“Is she moving here?”
“No.”
York studied me. His dark eyes were lined with thick lashes, giving him a softness betrayed by the scars on his face.
“Ojai thinks she’s knocked up.”
“He thinks that, why?”
“He said she looked round in the belly.”
Glaring at York, I asked, “What was Ojai doing looking at her belly?”
“Is that your way of confirming he’s right?”
Barely restraining my anger, I snarled, “Did he share this theory with more than you?”
“Probably.”
“Did it occur to him that sharing those theories might put a target on the round part of Elle?”
York shrugged. “He was rightfully confused about why you’d let her stay over.”
“Her being hot wasn’t enough of a reason?”
“No, not really. You’ve fucked plenty of hot women, but you don’t let them into your space. Not even that sweet little thing with stars in her eyes. What was her name?”
“I don’t know.”
“Kerrie, I think.”
“Sure.”
“She worshipped the ground you walked on, but you blew her off once she asked to go upstairs.”
“I don’t let women in my space.”
Holding my gaze, York pointed out, “Elle is a woman.”
“No, she’s Clint Reed’s little sister.”
“And your baby mama.”
Shrugging, I admitted, “Well, there’s that, too.”
York studied me for a long time while I texted our guys around town. Once I told them to show up for the night at the clubhouse, I frowned at my road captain.
“What?”
“You’re going soft.”
“Fuck off.”
“Elle comes from our world. Is that what you want?”
Exhaling, I rolled my eyes and wished York had kept his mouth shut. I didn’t want to talk about my damn feelings, but I also needed my guys to understand my balls remained intact.
“Elle clicked for me, but that doesn’t mean I plan to marry her. The kid was an accident. But he’s mine, meaning he has value and will be a target. I need you to get past your confusion at how I possess a heart and remember what happened with Nova.”
“I know you have a heart. I just didn’t think it was silly like a girl’s,” York taunted and grinned. “You were so damn funny when we showed up. All nervous like your parents caught you with a girl in the house.”
“I was half-asleep. That’s why I didn’t think to mention for you fuckers not to gossip.”
“You were awake enough to worry about Elle touching Ojai and me,” York said and laughed. “You’re such a possessive little bitch.”
“No, not possessive. I was just worried she’d catch a disease from you fucks and get my boy sick.”
York chuckled. “Look at you being a silly goose.”
Flashing him a dirty look, I growled, “Have your fun, asshole.”
“Do you know for sure it’s a boy?”
“Yeah. We’re naming him Megatron.”
“Sure, why not? Elle named her other kid Sutter Cane.”
“Do you know where that name came from?”
“Yeah, it’s from a movie.”
Frowning, I wondered what would have happened if York had been the one to answer her “Do you read Sutter Cane?” question. Would she be carrying his kid?
I fought the urge to shit on my feelings for Elle. If I could stop caring about her, I’d be less restless right now. She felt too far away. My home seemed empty and unappealing. The woman had fucked up my life!
Even before the baby, Elle had me wrapped up in the palm of her hand. I hadn’t been interested in any other pussy. Tonight was no different.
When the clubhouse opened up to the public, hot and horny women arrived to party. I stood at the bar, blowing off one chick after another.
My mood worsened until Elle texted to say she missed me.
“I’m too fond of you,” she said. “Reply with something to make me miss you less.”
I texted, “I think you gave me crabs.”
Elle responded with a laughing gif. “Lula and Exile are cool with me driving down with them to help York move. I hope you get your crabs taken care of before I arrive.”
“What about your boy?”
“Sutter’s coming with us. He’ll stay at Lula’s house while I hang out at the clubhouse and submit to your charms.”
Looking around the clubhouse, I felt uneasy. This was my place. Though I knew ninety-nine percent of the people, I didn’t feel like the bar was safe.
“No,” I texted to Elle. “On both you and Sutter. Don’t come here.”
Elle replied with an “I can’t hear you” gif.
Walking to the back office, I dialed her up. She didn’t answer, and my call went to voicemail. When I called again, she picked up.
“Why didn’t you answer?”
“I was on the toilet. Talking while peeing is rude. If you had better parents, you’d know that, lover.”
Kicking the office door shut, I growled, “Don’t come to Baton Rouge.”
“Don’t you miss me at all?” she demanded. “It’s not like I gave you crabs on purpose.”
Shaking my head, I needed Elle to take me seriously. “It’s not safe here.”
“I know. That’s why I’m coming with your VP. Sutter can enjoy Lula’s pool and get used to the humidity for when he visits Baton Rouge with Wilbur.”
“Just listen to me.”
“I am listening. I hear you. If you decide you don’t want to hang out when I’m there, so be it. But I’m still coming. This visit is happening. Just accept that fact and adjust to it.”
“I hate you sometimes.”
“Oh, my, God, you do miss me!” she squealed, making me both hate her more and smile at her bullshit.
“Ojai likely blabbed about your situation.”
“How did he know about my situation?”
“You’ve gotten thick.”
I nearly yelled when I realized Elle had hung up on me. Dialing her back, I was ready to give her shit.
“What’s up, lover?” she asked casually as if nothing just happened.
“Don’t come here.”
“I miss you.”
Elle killed me when she turned off the feisty shit and spoke from her heart. She stole my balls every single fucking time!
“I’ll come see you,” I said when she wouldn’t budge.
“That’s a bad plan. Wouldn’t it be easier to kill one guy on the highway than an SUV full of targets?”
“No.”
“I feel like my math checks out, so just accept I’ll be down in a week to help York move. I won’t ask to visit your clubhouse if that’s a step too far. But Sutter and I are curious about life down there. We know Wilbur will want to visit you a lot.”
Her words gutted me. Elle Reed has officially torn off my balls and stolen my manhood.
I could picture my son. He felt so damn real. I got a flash of Sutter and my boy walking together with Elle close behind. They were a perfect little unit, and I wanted to be a part of it.
For the first time, I accepted I was different now. Living as a lone wolf would never be enough.