Chapter 18 #3
Wide-eyed, his lips twitched, color once more appearing in his cheeks. He took another mouthful, looked me dead in the eye, and moaned. The sound was too quiet to reach the other people in the room, but fuck if it didn’t have my cock jerking awake.
“Dude… you really want to play that game?”
He tilted his head, and a familiar warmth flooded his gaze when he answered, “Always.”
Air rushed out of my lungs. Fuck, I so needed to hear that. Today had been an unequivocal nightmare. Eddie’s strange, almost wary reactions adding fuel to my nerves. That one word helped unravel the pit of dread sitting heavily in my body.
He finished eating in silence, while I kept half an eye on Lottie, watching the progress of the cast.
The rustling of wrappers drew my attention back to Eddie. “I didn’t realize I was so hungry. Thanks for bringing us food.”
“You’re welcome. Feeling better?”
After flicking his gaze in Lottie’s general direction, he answered, “Yeah. Less panicked. More human.”
“Good. My work here is almost done.”
“Almost?”
“When Lottie’s fast asleep, I can show you.”
Eddie shifted in his seat, sent me a look of warning, and glanced quickly away. I chuckled quietly, loving I could distract him so easily.
“Okay, we’re all done.” The doctor stood, drawing our attention her way.
Both Eddie and I eased out of our uncomfortable chairs and made our way over. Lottie was supporting a bright red cast. Despite her drooping eyes, she smiled. “Thank you.”
“I would say anytime, but hopefully this will be the last time you have to pay a visit to the hospital,” the doctor responded kindly, then peered up at Eddie. “Nurse Madison will just collect the necessary paperwork you’ll need to sign, then you’ll be able to head on home.”
Eddie responded with a tired smile and shook the doctor’s hand. “We really appreciate you taking such good care of her.”
My heart stuttered and I extended my hand for a shake, realizing the “we” included me. “Absolutely. Thanks, Doctor.”
“My pleasure. You all take care.” She turned back to Lottie. “And how many legs do chairs have so they’re stable?”
Pink trickled into Lottie’s cheeks, and a shifty smile appeared. “Four.”
“That’s right.” She followed up with a wink and headed out of the room.
I set about tidying away our takeout containers while Eddie got Lottie ready.
By the time the room was straightened up, the nurse returned with the insurance paperwork and discharge papers.
And then finally, at close to midnight, we were being escorted to Eddie’s car before we were making our way back to his home.
A comfortable silence filled the car on the drive, the three of us flagging after our stressful evening. I was relieved Eddie’s place was so close, else I was sure I’d have been snoring with the lull of the moving vehicle.
By the time we pulled into the garage space, Lottie was barely awake. Eddie guided her out of the car and helped her get ready for bed, while I grabbed us two bottles of water and said goodnight to Lottie with a kiss on her brow before making my way directly to Eddie’s room.
I just hoped like hell he wouldn’t kick me out to sleep in the spare room. Not tonight. We both need the comfort of each other’s arms.
“Hey.” He entered his bedroom and closed the door behind him. I took that as a good start and made my way over to him.
Pressing my mouth against his, I sighed into the kiss, bubbles of relief coming to life when he kissed me back, wrapping his arms around me. Our kiss was slow, tender, gentle brushes of our lips and swipes of our tongues.
When he eased out of the touch, rather than breaking free, Eddie buried his face against my neck. Warm breath tickled my skin, and I squeezed him closer, knowing he needed this as much as I did.
“I’m so sorry we missed the game.” There was a tentative husk to his voice that I didn’t like, but I wasn’t quite ready to let him go yet.
“You don’t need to apologize for Lottie hurting herself.”
At my words, he pulled out of my hold, an unhappy expression on his face. He sighed and offered me a fake-as-fuck smile as he stepped around me and made his way to the bed. When he sat down on the mattress, he clasped his hands and stared down at them.
“What is it?” I asked.
Without meeting my eyes, he said, “You were off your game.”
The statement, while true, was a fuck of a thing to hear from him, especially with such a despondent voice. Something twisted in my chest, but I remained silent.
“Did it…” He huffed out a breath, giving me the quickest of glances.
“Were you distracted?” Once again, his gaze connected with mine.
Whatever he saw in my expression had him continuing.
“I mean, it’s so unlike you, and you didn’t play like you usually do.
” A shadow of remorse flickered in his eyes, and understanding slammed into me.
Guilt encompassed him.
“While I like the fact that you only have eyes for me,” I jested, hating the heaviness between us, “you know I wasn’t the only player on the team, right?”
He didn’t laugh. “Pearce, I’m serious.”
“That’s pretty obvious,” I said, feeling suddenly awkward standing in the middle of his room. Nothing about his body language screamed he wanted my comfort.
A frustrated line appeared on his mouth.
“Eddie, just say what’s on your mind and stop dancing around it, okay?” Him taking on this kicked-puppy look freaked me out. In five years I’d never seen him behave this was before.
“I think,” he started, sitting up straight and making a valiant effort to meet my eyes, “you were expecting me there and when I didn’t show, it put you off your game.
I know you’re not the only player, and I watched enough of the game to see there were a variety of decisions that were poor ones, but I’m focused on you.
My concern is for you and how this thing between us messed up your chances at getting to the finals. ”
“Thing?” I jolted back, my eyes widening as hurt flared to life. “What the fuck’s that meant to mean? Thing?”
Eddie blanched. “I didn’t mean…” He shook his head. “This has just been all so fast and now it’s impacting your game. Your dreams.”
Emotion, thick and fast, threatened to bowl me other. At the pinnacle was a punch of incredulous anger. “Five fucking years I’ve been in love with you.” The words shot out. “If that’s fucking fast, we need to work on the definition.” I clenched my jaw and pulled in a deep breath.
“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to ignore our time together, our friendship—”
“Really?” I gave a humorless laugh. “’Cause I have to say, Eddie, right now it feels like the past five years were completely irrelevant and my feelings are invalid.”
“No.” He stood up quickly and I was so, so tempted to take a step back. This was not how tonight was meant to go down. “Of course your feelings are valid, and real. I’m sorry. I’m doing a shit job at apologizing and a worse job at telling you how I feel.”
I loosened my tight jaw and took a big breath. “And how do you feel?” My voice was tight and low while my pulse picked up speed, freakin’ terrified at what would fall from his mouth.
Automatically, my muscles contracted, and I held my breath, preparing to protect myself.
“I love you so much that just the thought of you hurting because of me breaks my fucking heart.”
A fast, unsteady breath whooshed out of me. “You’re a fucking idiot,” I whispered shakily and took the necessary steps to engulf him in a hug. “Jesus, I thought you were trying to end this thing between us.”
He squeezed my waist. “That’s the last thing I want.
” He shook his head and blew out a breath.
“I just wish you’d been able to see my message before the game so at least you knew what was happening.
I wasn’t trying to say you’re incapable.
My head’s just a mess and I freaked the fuck out.
I’m sorry. I definitely don’t want to be ending things between us. ”
I swore my heart tripped over itself at his words. “It’s a good job, as there’s not a chance I’m letting you go.” I searched for his mouth, capturing it a second later, pouring everything I felt for this man into every touch.
Passion burned in my veins, fueling me to show Eddie just how much his words meant. Dragging my mouth away and panting, I stared at him, realizing I hadn’t said the words back. Sure, I’d shouted them at him, but that wasn’t quite the same.
“What?” Confusion furrowed his brow, but he didn’t lose the desire in his gaze.
“I swear it feels like I’ve loved you forever.”
His mouth curved at my words. “Forever, huh?”
I grinned, affection clogging my throat. “Five years… forever… same difference.”
Rather than answer, he drew me back in for a kiss, our lips exploring, never letting up. Each movement, each taste seeped beneath my skin, burrowing its way even deeper into my soul.
The clusterfuck of a day didn’t matter. Not when Eddie in my arms was so right, so perfect. More than that, it was everything. And I could barely get my head around the fact that we were finally here.
When I pulled away for the second time, he growled, the sound scorching my skin in the best of ways.
“Tomorrow,” I said, once more capturing his gaze. “I want us to tell Lottie that we’re together tomorrow.” I held my breath, waiting for his response. While his telling Lottie was ultimately his decision, it didn’t mean I wasn’t prepared to push or plead if necessary.
I wanted to be able to hold this man’s hand whenever and wherever. I wanted to share his bed and wake up beside him. Sure, the reality of my career was a huge fucking elephant between us, let alone in the room, but I had to believe we’d figure it out.
“Okay.” He nodded. “We can tell her first thing.”
“Yeah?” The grin on my face was wide and so full of relief, his smile softened.
“Yeah, definitely.”
“Thank Christ.” And then I was on him, tearing free of our clothes, our kisses fast and messy as we stumbled while undressing, trying to get to the bed. “I want inside you.”
His breath caught and body shuddered at my words. “Yes.” Eddie clambered onto the bed, turned so his ass was before me, and dug around in his bedside drawer.
“Holy fuck, yeah, just like this.”
A sultry smirk that told me he’d known exactly what he was up to when he’d searched for the lube lifted his lips as he glanced at me. He threw the lube on the bed, and I swiped it up, opening the cap as I kneeled behind him and showered him with kisses.
A soft sigh slipped from his lips when I finally inserted a slick finger. He leaned further, head resting on his hands on the mattress, his perfect ass in the air, waiting for me to take good care of preparing him.
“Be fast. Little prep. I just need you inside me,” he said with a wispy sigh as I inserted a second finger.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I said reverently, loosening him up.
“You could never hurt me.”
The conviction in his words embraced me, shrouded me so damn tight that I swallowed hard and trembled.
Slicking myself up, I pressed more kisses to his back before whispering, “I love you so much.” A moment later, I eased into him, pausing at the tightness, carefully easing in further until his muscles loosened, welcoming me in.
And finally, fucking finally, I entered him fully, as deep as my dick could go. Not giving him time for an extra breath, I pulled back before penetrating him in long, sure strokes. With each drag of my cock in his ass, he gasped and groaned, getting to the point he all but vibrated beneath me.
“So fucking hot,” I praised, driving into him.
“I need…”
I leaned over him and pulled him back up with me, his back to my chest as I thrust deep and hard. “I’ve got you.” Gripping his cock, I smoothed my fingers over him, rubbing in the slick still on my fingers.
Eddie’s trembling increased, and he gasped as I jerked him off in time with fucking him.
“That’s it, baby,” I whispered against his neck, kissing up his jaw, chasing his mouth.
The groan when he angled and captured my mouth was so fucking hot and dirty that I sucked on his tongue, wishing I could do the same to his dick. My kiss was possessive, full of need, and filled with so much love that my heart clenched and threatened to explode.
I’d gladly let it happen, too, if this was the beginning of the rest of our life. “I want this with you forever,” I whispered after breaking our kiss. I didn’t give a shit that I was spilling my guts as easily as I spilled my cum. Eddie deserved all of my truths.
“Okay.” He followed up with a kiss, but I pulled back, my heart hammering in my chest.
“No, I mean it.” I stilled, the reality of what I wanted so bright and clear in my vision that I had no choice but to continue.
Eddie frowned, staring at me wide-eyed from his awkward angle.
Shit, I really needed to do this. Now.
I pulled out of him.
“What the—”
I cut him off by manhandling him so we faced each other. Concern bled into his eyes, but all I focused on were his flushed cheeks and just how amazing and gorgeous he was.
“Marry me.” The words tumbled free. When he startled, his brows lifting, I held on tight. “I mean it. I love you so fucking much. Marry me.”
His mouth fell open before closing again, his gaze darting around my face. “But…” He trailed off, still staring, still trying to read me.
“But marry me.”
And then it happened. The slightest curve of his lips. The flare of his eyes. The added tremble in his hands as they clutched me back. “You mean it? You want this with me…?” He paused before saying, “With Lottie?”
With my heart in my throat, I managed a nod, smiling so wide it hurt. “I’ve never been more certain about anything. Ever. I think we’re an amazing family.”
His gaze softened, hearing the present tense of my words. It didn’t matter that we hadn’t been romantically together for long. We’d been a family for over five years.
“I think we’re an amazing family too,” he whispered, tears springing to his eyes.
My tear ducts took note and reacted in kind when I asked, “So… marry me.”
“Yeah… yes… okay.” The last word came out on a broken laugh, and I fell against him, pushing him deep into the mattress.
Wordlessly, my chest so full of wonder and love, I positioned once more at his entrance and pushed into him. I caught his gasp with my mouth and kissed him slowly, tenderly, so fucking reverently that I knew it would leave no room for Eddie to not feel soul-deep the depth of my love.