Chapter 40
Chapter Forty
Ken
Once they emerged from the meeting, Trent took point giving the other attendees the rundown and announcing Badger as the acting Pack Alpha.
As predicted, every face mirrored the shock Ken felt over first hearing the news.
Eerie silence descended over the group as they processed what it meant before everyone dropped to their knee and offered their throats.
Ken didn’t know why the sight of that sent a shiver through him—not a pleasant one, either—but he hoped he’d never again see it in his lifetime.
“An’ we’re not tellin’ anyone else yet,” Badger said, eying the crowd once they all stood. “If yer not sure ye can keep it a secret, speak up now so one of us Primes can help ye wi’ that.” Badger indicated for Trent to continue.
“Official word will go out through the usual pack notification system,” Trent said. “Obviously, if Peyton shows up in the next day or so, we don’t want this news getting out until he’s ready to announce what happened.”
“And I want to notify all the Enforcers first before the pack at large learns about it,” Dewi grimly added.
Once they finished, Asia walked over, looking a mix of shocked and angry. She crooked a finger at Trent and motioned for him to follow her into the office, where they closed the door behind them.
Dewi leaned in close to Ken, her arm touching his. “Well, she’s about to give him an ass-reaming.”
Ken tried to disguise his laughter as a cough. “Should we go in and help him?” Ken silently asked.
Dewi snorted. “You couldn’t pay me enough money to walk into that room right now,” she whispered. “I’d rather go ten rounds with a rabid grizzly bear with both hands tied behind my back while wearing a suit made out of raw flank steaks than walk into that room.”
When they emerged a few minutes later, Asia immediately sought out Gillian, and they retreated to the master bedroom, closing the door behind them.
“Well, he’s still got his balls,” Dewi snarked. “That’s a plus.”
“How mad is she that we didn’t tell her sooner?” Ken wondered.
“It was Peyton’s instructions,” Dewi said. “Not our call to make. Trent is her mate and Peyton’s second. Although with the kids, it would have been harder for her to hide from them that something was wrong before the announcement was made.”
Ken forced himself to eat and noticed he wasn’t the only one with a reduced appetite. Normally, at a gathering like this, there would be boisterous laughter and talking.
Not tonight.
He didn’t like to think about the word “wake,” but that was exactly what it felt like.
About an hour later, Badger walked up to Ken.
Earlier, Badger had made the rounds of the attendees to personally reinforce the command not to reveal the information, then walked over to Trent and Asia’s with them to break the news to Tamsin and the kids—and put a little Prime spin on the command to the kids to not spill the beans.
Now, what attendees were left were in the process of helping clean up.
“Well?” Badger asked, looking like he felt as sick inside as Ken did. “Shall we get this over wit’?”
Ken nodded.
“Where ye wanna do it?”
“Office, please,” Ken said.
“And yer sure we don’t need Dewi or Trent or Duncan?”
Duncan had walked over. “No,” he said before Ken could respond, once again meeting Ken’s gaze.
“Because I know the talk I had with Charlie when I handed over control to him. And while Charlie died before Peyton was named Pack Alpha, I’m willing to bet he pre-loaded certain info to him the way Peyton did with you, Ken. Right?”
Nodding, Ken wished they could just get this over with.
Duncan reached out and laid a hand on Ken’s shoulder. While he felt the Prime’s power, he knew Duncan wasn’t using it on Ken, per se. “You let me know what you need from me, son. Okay?”
It wasn’t a silent statement about his deeper meaning so much as a feeling Ken got. “You mean if Badger somehow can’t completely erase it?” Ken confirmed.
“Because Dewi isn’t supposed to know any of it,” Duncan silently mouthed. “Not yet, at least.”
Ken nodded.
“And I bet that you hold certain triggers that will unlock info Badger holds, too.”
Feeling even more nauseous, Ken nodded again.
Badger looked from Ken to Duncan and back again. “Why can’t I have Duncan in the room wi’ us?” Badger asked. “If I’m the actin’ Pack Alpha, ain’t that my prerogative?”
Duncan and Ken both shook their heads but Ken spoke. “My orders are it’s for your ears only. What you do with certain items of information after our talk is up to you.”
“He’s siloed everything,” Duncan said, focusing on Badger. “Peyton, I mean. And rightfully so. If you’ll recall, it’s what I did with you and Charlie.” His jaw tensed. “And likely what Charlie did with you and Peyton, as well. And that’s another reason it should be you, Badger. Because it’s—”
“Institutional knowledge,” Ken numbly said, recalling exactly what Peyton had dubbed it.
“Exactly,” Duncan grimly agreed, giving Ken’s shoulder a paternal squeeze before releasing him.
“Much of it knowledge that might still be in your own brain, Badger. Also siloed. But I will sit outside the door and make sure you aren’t interrupted.
Once you do whatever’s necessary, if either of you need to call me in, please do. ”
“Because we need a Prime at the door to keep Dewi out,” Badger silently mouthed, and Ken and Duncan nodded.
Ken followed Badger inside while Duncan pulled the door closed behind them after Duncan gave Ken a final encouraging nod.
Badger cleared his throat. “Eh, I don’t know what we have to do, lad.”
“Let’s sit,” Ken suggested.
“Might take a while, aye?”
“Sure,” he said. “But more because I don’t really want to risk fainting in front of you again.”
Badger barked a soft laugh as Ken sank into one of the chairs in front of Peyton’s desk and shifted it so he faced Badger. Badger lowered his bulk into the other after turning it to face Ken, close enough that the two men could easily touch to silently communicate.
“What now?” Badger grimly asked.
Ken took a deep breath, held out his hand, and said, “You just need to listen with your Prime, and you’ll know what to do.”
When they both finally sat back, Ken felt close to puking.
It didn’t comfort him that Badger looked nearly as ill.
“Holy shite,” the shifter whispered. “Yeah, Duncan, Charlie, and Peyton gave me a bunch of that. The older stuff, obviously,” he continued. “But…” He shook his head. “Now I see why he set it up like this.”
Ken handed him the envelope marked JANUS. “I’m supposed to give this to you to read, too.”
Badger hesitated before his thick finger slipped under the envelope’s flap and he opened it, pulling out the index card.
Then a mask descended over Badger’s features. He slowly slipped the card back into the envelope and took a disquieting amount of time to meet Ken’s gaze.
“Do ye trust me, boyo?” he quietly asked.
Ken’s throat went dry. “Yeah,” he hoarsely said.
Badger heavily sighed. “I have certain…discretion,” he said. “And given the circumstances, I want to institute some insurance of my own.”
Ken nodded.
Badger held out his hand again. “Close yer eyes and just breathe. This won’t take long.”
Ken did.
When Ken opened his eyes, Duncan stood there with a small garbage can and a glass of water in his hand.
Ken grabbed the garbage can and immediately puked into it, although he wasn’t certain why. Fortunately, there was a plastic liner in the can.
Now he knew why Duncan held the glass of water out to him. After retching again, Ken gratefully took the glass, rinsed his mouth, and spit.
He also realized there were things…missing from his mind, disquieting conscious thoughts that he could no longer recall, even though he knew they were there.
And he could recall the feelings those thoughts gave him.
Not good ones.
Both men carefully watched him with nearly identical grim expressions on their faces.
“What?” Ken hoarsely asked.
“Better?” Badger asked.
“I don’t know. Why’d I puke?”
“We had a…chat,” Badger said. “There’s some knowledge I need you to hold on to for me in case it’s needed. And ye told me it was makin’ ye feel sick.”
He watched the shifters for a moment and realized they were talking silently with their Prime. “I don’t want to know what I know, do I?”
They both shook their heads. “I know Peyton wanted me to wipe yer mind completely, but there are…reasons I can’t. I did some of it, things from long ago and even recently that ye have no reason to know, and that others do, so it’s not lost.”
Ken caught sight of the clock on the wall and realized they’d been there nearly two hours. “Holy shit,” he said.
But his stomach had, miraculously, settled.
Duncan took the garbage can from him. “I know some things now, too,” Duncan said. “Some I already knew, a lot I didn’t. I was able to take some of that from you, as well.”
Ken sat back and sipped the water. “I hate this shit,” he said. “I hate having my brain used as a backup drive.”
The men nodded. “I can understand that,” Badger said. “And I don’t blame ye. But as you called it, it’s institutional knowledge too valuable to lose and in some cases too deadly to risk storing it outside someone’s brain.”
“There was also knowledge you recently acquired,” Duncan said. “Things Peyton has you doing. We left you with all of that because we both feel you still need it.”
Ken slumped back in his chair. “Now what?”
“Now we get back to the business of running the pack,” Badger said.
“And preparing for war,” Duncan added.
Ken’s stomach rolled slightly, but didn’t completely upend again. “Fucking terrific,” he muttered.