Chapter 48
On the path.
“Baby, I know what we discussed last night. Can we talk a little bit more about the open marriage when I get back home?” Carter started when he made it to Seattle. He’d left at the crack of dawn, waking me up with more sex, promising me we were still that team...that partnership.
Tossing my purse in the passenger seat, I bit back my annoyance before I climbed into my SUV. Of course, he didn’t really mean we could have an open marriage. He was trying to avoid Chelsea talk. “We said no rules, so there’s nothing to discuss.”
“I meant if we should even do that. It might cause too much confusion and mess. We both get jealous and have tempers.”
“You think? Cheating is never good in a relationship,” I commented sarcastically.
He was being a real jock right now and not using the good common sense he was given.
Backtracking like he was even going to go through with what I suggested in the first place.
“Why can’t you be honest with me? Then, at least, I won’t feel like I’m being played. ”
“You’re not being played. I love you. I don’t think discussing anything about Chelsea is good for our marriage. She is the past. I won’t leave you for her or another woman, so let’s move on, okay?”
“Okay.” I gritted my teeth.
“You still flying in tonight or this weekend?” He asked. This time, his tone sounded hopeful and expectant.
I pressed the ignition and replied through my speakers, “We already talked. Think I want to spend the weekend with Mama and the twins. It’s been a lot.”
“Come on, we can order room service and watch movies. We do need more time away from the children.”
“Not really up for traveling.” I drove down our long driveway to the street.
“You’re still mad.”
“Not mad. Disappointed that you can’t see we won’t survive this way.”
“We will be fine.”
“Really? Oh... then why did I sign a three-year lease on that space I wanted you to see two days ago? You were never going to agree, and I did it for me. Still think we’ll be fine since I made a major decision without you?”
He remained silent for a long time before he finally spoke again. “I will do better as a husband to support you. When I get home, I want to see your new place. Maybe we can sit together and tell me your vision for the pharmacy.”
I stared at my screen. What did he do to be so compliant with whatever I wanted?
“I can tell you’re driving. Where are you going?” Carter asked.
“I told you that I would bring Elle to meet Grey. He works at UCLA and wants me to bring her there to the track.”
He retorted, “So you and he talk on the phone now?”
“He texted me.”
Carter snapped, “Same difference.”
I blew a raspberry.
“Sorry...sorry,” he quieted down.
“You can’t have it both ways, Carter. You want to know everything I’m doing, and I can’t know the same.
Because it regards your daughter, I’m telling you what’s happening.
If you want me to video or FaceTime you later when we get there, I can.
As far as Elle is concerned, I’ll be transparent and keep you in the loop about everything.
I won’t let him take her from you or me, okay? ”
“Does that mean everything else between you and Grey is none of my business?” He asked sharply.
My pressure began to rise as I clamped down on the need to scream at him. “What do you want from me, Carter? I don’t want to fight with you. I can’t make you talk, and I can’t just let you walk all over me. I want us to be honest about everything, but you don’t want to be that way with me.”
“I do. Some things may be hard for you to forgive, okay? I need you and my children too much, and although I ache at the thought of him being around you...being around my daughter, I’m giving you that.
I won’t get in the way of Elle getting to know Grey.
In return, can you just trust that I fucked up in the past and it won’t happen again? ”
I wanted to argue how I could trust him when I had no idea what he’d done in the first place. But he wasn’t going to divulge his secret. At least, not now. “Do you want me to FaceTime you later?”
“No. Not ready to see them together. Just call me later and tell me what happened.” He sighed, “Love you.”
“Okay.” I clicked off the cell, refusing to give him more than I already had.
“SO, HE’S A REAL LIVE Olympic star like Usain Bolt?” Elle practically bounced in the back seat. “I wish E could be here with me.”
“Another time," I promised. "Mr. Jameson asked to see only you so he can give you tips about running. Besides, E’s just as happy that Grandma is taking him to get Boba tea.”
I didn't explain to my mother where I was taking Elle, but told her we would talk later tonight after the children were asleep. I needed my mother's guidance and understanding, and not her judgment.
Her legs swung back and forth from the booster seat. She was small for her age and hated that Ethyn was so much bigger and taller. “You think he will be my coach? E says I run real fast. So does Daddy.”
“When did he see you run?” I’d just discovered last Saturday that she could run. I hadn’t realized Carter had seen her, too.
“The other night, when you were in the shower. I showed him I could run in the hallway. He looked shocked, Mama.” She giggled.
Probably like I did. “Elle, you’re not supposed to run the house.”
“But it’s so big and has a lot of space. Daddy lets us do it all the time.”
“He does? Well, guess Daddy and I need to have a conversation.” He probably was caught up in ESPN while the children ran rampant.
“No, Mama. No more arguing. I won’t run in the house again. I promise.” I checked the rearview mirror, and her light brown, chubby face had reddened.
“It’s all right, my Evening Star. I’m not mad at you or Daddy.” I glanced through the mirror, gauging her reaction. “Sometimes parents argue. There’s nothing to be worried about.”
She met my concerned gaze through the mirror. “I heard Daddy talking to Grandma, telling her he was afraid you would leave him.”
Fuck. “I was mad with Daddy because we were supposed to take a trip, and he had to go to work instead. I’m not leaving him.” Yet.
“Okay.” Her large brown puff swayed when she nodded with a soft smile.
“Okay. Enough talk about Daddy. Let’s go see if Mr. Jameson wants to coach you.”
She clapped her hands. “Yeah, Mama!”
A few minutes later, we parked and headed to the track toward the back of the beautiful sprawling campus. Just walking to Drake Stadium, where the track was located, was enough exercise for the week.
When we finally arrived at the track, sweaty and tired, I spotted Grey with several runners.
He wore a thin red tracksuit as he instructed the two women.
He smiled as he demonstrated with his arms how he expected them to run.
The two women nodded and started running around the track.
Grey looked over his shoulder and waved at us, though his focus was on Elle.
She looked up at me. “Can I, Mama?”
“Yes,” I replied, and she ran to Grey as fast as her legs could carry her, already ready to impress him.
I teared up when he raised his hands for her to jump and high-five him.
A form of praising that Elle loved the most. I approached them slowly, watching their interaction.
Elle talked animatedly, hands flying as she explained whatever he’d asked of her, while Grey stared with an admiring smile.
Elle grabbed my hand and moved me closer to Grey. “Mama, he told me that I probably run faster than he did at my age.”
“That’s a fact because I beat him,” I teased, feeling joyful that Elle and Grey were together in the same space.
Elle’s eyes widened. “You beat him? I never even saw you run.”
Grey chimed in. “We were kids, and it was a lucky break because your mother hated any form of exercise.”
“I learned to like it when I got older.”
Elle’s eyes sparkled. “Daddy makes her exercise. She really hates it, Mr. Jameson.”
He blinked back tears and nodded as I apologized silently. Grey kneeled to be at eye level with Elle, and she squealed. “Mama, his eyes change colors like mine. Isn’t it cool?” She asked Grey.
Grey chuckled. “Never thought about it. I guess it is cool. I think it’s cooler that our eyes are alike, and we both like to run.
” He held his hand out to her. “We didn’t formally introduce ourselves.
I’m Grant Jameson, a four-time Olympic Gold Medalist. My friends and family call me Grey. Tell me about who you are?”
Elle grinned widely. “My name is Elle Star St. Patrick, and I’m seven years old. My mother calls me Evening Star. I’m just Elle to everyone else, and I hope you’ll be my coach so I can win a medal, too.”
“Then call me Coach Grey.” His full lips curved into a smile, and the crinkles around his hazel eyes only made him seem warm and kind. Elle hugged his neck impulsively, and Grey held her to him and closed his eyes. I had to turn away. The moment was too beautiful for me not to ugly cry.
Grey pulled back first and winked. “Want to race? You have to show your Mama you were faster than her, too.”
Elle bragged, “I know I am. She’s old now.”
Laughing, I stepped back and, with clasped hands, watched my best friend instruct his daughter in proper running form before they readied to race.
My throat hurt so much from all my yelling, cheering Elle on as she squeaked past her father at the last second.
Of course, he let her win, but Elle didn’t know that.
Her face shone brightly as he picked her up and swung her around while she raised her arms in victory.
The other runners clapped and cheered, too.
I moved to the bleachers and watched Elle proudly practice with Grey and the other two young ladies, who probably and accurately thought Elle was his daughter. Even if they commented, Elle was too young to make any connection. I doubt he would acknowledge or deny it if asked.
After about twenty minutes, Elle jogged to the other side of the field with his students.
Grey flopped down next to me, reminding me of my years watching him run.
“She’s amazing, and she’s mine.” He looked at me with a proud smile.
“I’ve been a mess all day, wondering how she would react to me and if she would even like me.
This way couldn’t be more perfect, and she really has the makings of a runner.
She’s fast, and more importantly, she loves it, like I did back then. ”
“Crazy, how strong genes are.”
He nodded and rested back on his elbows. “I’m surprised Carter let her come. She’s definitely a Daddy’s girl. She talks about him a lot.”
I touched his hand, which rested next to me. “I’m sorry.”
Grey shrugged. “Still making peace with everything. Can’t say I will ever completely forgive or accept how you handled things, but I can’t live in the past. It isn’t how I operate anymore.
At least he treated her like his own when he didn’t have to do that.
” We both watched Elle laughing and running sprints with the two women. “Did he tell you about Chelsea?”
“The only thing he admitted was fucking Chelsea the day before my birthday and said it was before me.”
Grey shook his head. “Well, I can’t say I regret it. We wouldn’t have happened, and that little angel wouldn’t be here.”
I grinned and nudged him. “This is why I need you in my life. You reminded me why I should at least let that part go.”
“He refused to tell you anything else?”
“Told me that her son wasn’t his and that if I knew everything, it would change how I see him, and he can’t lose me.”
“That was enough for you to stay with him?” He snorted. “You’re so weak when it comes to him.”
I hugged my knees. “Not weak, playing his game for now. It’s how I brought Elle here without his anger or a fight. Basically, he agreed to step back and let you know, Elle, and he doesn’t have to tell me anything else about Chelsea.”
“You agreed to that?” He incredulously asked.
“Carter was scared to tell me, and I don’t know what would be worse than having a child with Chelsea.
I already told him what I thought. I don’t get why he didn’t want to talk.
He just evaded it altogether. I even asked him if he held on to Chelsea because he doubted my love for him, which I could understand on some level. ”
“So, do you want me to tell you what happened between Carter and me?” He looked at me. The sun changed his eyes to blue.
“No. I want Chelsea to tell me. She tried to tell me about Carter in a letter, and I ripped it before I read it. Do you have her number?”
“It’s been a minute, so I’m not sure if it’s a good number. I can check her IG and message her.” He stood up and pulled his cell out of his pocket. “What made you decide to ask her directly? You trust she’ll tell you the truth?”
“I thought about what you said. I did drop both my friends once I got with Carter. I gave him a second chance and was never angry with you. Yet, I wouldn’t even give her a chance to explain why she never told me she had been with Carter.
I know when my husband is lying, and a part of me believes he’s telling the truth that he doesn’t have a child with Chelsea. ”
“Fucking unbelievable.” He exclaimed as he passed me his phone. “Chelsea is in L.A.”
I picked it up. Chelsea smiled while standing in front of the Beverly Hills Wilshire Hotel.
The hotel from the movie Pretty Woman. Chelsea was even more beautiful and stylish than when I’d last seen her.
She was with another woman whose face was half-hidden as she did the fish lips pose.
“Think I need to take a trip to this hotel.”
“It’s only a few minutes away, and it looks like she just took this pic not long ago.”
We both looked across the field at a focused Elle.
Grey waved me on. “Just go. I’ll practice more with her and convince her and my other runners to grab a smoothie on campus or something if you’re not done.”
“You still have my mother’s number?”
“If it’s the same, then yes.”
“You know my Mama hates change. Either call her to pick up Elle or bring Elle to her if I take too long.” I scrambled up and yelled to Elle. “I have to run an errand. Coach Grey and the ladies will take care of you. Is that cool?”
Elle nodded happily and resumed watching the women race.
I kissed Grey’s cheek as I hurried away on a mission to get to the bottom of all this. Fate was on my side. As big as L.A. is, Chelsea stays at a hotel a few minutes from my current location.
Fifteen minutes later, I entered the lobby and went to the counter.
As I was about to ask to be connected to Chelsea’s room, I heard her melodic, raspy voice.
I turned around and looked in the direction of her voice.
She was sitting in the nearby bar, with her back facing me, flirting with a man.
I locked eyes with my husband when she tilted her head to check her phone.