Chapter 8
Blaine shoved a cookie into his mouth. His eyes rolled back into his head and his face went slack with bliss. “Oh, fuck me.”
Pretty sure that was his O face, right there. Great. I could have happily lived my whole life never witnessing it with my own two eyeballs if James Campos hadn’t waltzed in here with fresh-from-the-oven chocolate chip cookies, served up in a plastic container that Blaine now nestled lovingly against his chest.
“Hand them over,” Jesse demanded, reaching for the container.
Blaine swatted his hand and pivoted, curving his body protectively around the cookies like a running back cradling a football.
Steven and Jesse exchanged a glance, silent communication passing between them. It did not bode well for Blaine, although he was too busy devouring another cookie to notice. A second later, it was all over. Blaine rubbed his ribs where Steven got him with an elbow and Jesse held the container over his head. He pranced in a circle, holding the container high like a trophy in a stupid little victory dance.
“Will you shitheads cut it out?” I snapped. “You’re going to spook the horse.”
The four of us were at the ring, watching James work Magpie. Only three days into his training with James, and he was coming along nicely. Essie planned to swing by next week, and I had a feeling she was going to be pleased with his progress. That was a relief. Working with Essie was great for our business, and it never would have happened without James.
“If Magpie is going to be a rodeo horse, he needs to get used to chaos,” Blaine pointed out. “Anyway, James has him in hand.”
That was true. I watched as Magpie fidgeted, hopping and tossing his head like a fool, but James kept her hands calm and steady, refusing to fight. Then she opened one rein wide, giving him freedom to turn into it, and urged him forward in a tight circle.
“You got this, James!” Jesse called encouragingly.
I side-eyed him narrowly. The ranch hands weren’t exactly a touchy-feely group. We showed up, we did our jobs, and we got along, for the most part. What we did not do was holler on the sidelines like fucking cheerleaders.
She’d been here less than a week, and already she was making my men as soft and gooey on the inside as her chocolate chip cookies. I saw the way they fell all over themselves to open doors for her or arrange their chores so they happened to be in her vicinity. Dumbasses.
James widened the circle progressively as Magpie settled down until finally they were loping around the full perimeter of the ring. James had a huge grin on her face and, swear to god, Magpie looked like he was having the time of his life. Damn, there was something gorgeous about the way that woman rode a horse. The deceptive ease of her seat. The strong grip of her thighs wrapped around his belly.
Lucky horse.
She gave him his head and let him pick up more speed before gently bringing him back down again. When she brought him to a halt, she leaned forward and gave him a firm pat on the neck. “Such a good boy!” she cooed.
Apparently, my dick was just as dumb as these assholes because it twitched like her words were meant for me. Jesus.
“Damn fine job.” Blaine grinned. “Guess those pretty pink boots of yours were made for riding, after all.”
“So’s that pretty little ass,” Steven muttered as James swung her leg over Magpie’s back and dismounted.
My hand shot out and smacked the back of his head. “The fuck’s wrong with you?” I growled.
“Damn, boss.” Steven rubbed the back of his head. “I’m just saying what we’re all thinking.”
The fact that it was true made it not one whit better. I still wanted to personally remove his eyeballs from his head to keep him from looking at her the exact same way I had. She was just doing her job, and we were all staring at her like goddamn perverts. It was hard to say who I hated more in that moment: him or me.
Oh, who the hell was I kidding? It was me. It was definitely me.
I was her boss. I could hear Brax’s lecture in my head every bit as loudly as if he were standing next to me, shouting in my ear. The fine folks of Aspen Springs liked to claim that we were two peas in a pod, Brax and me, both of us living life with a stick shoved right up the ass. But I knew the nature of that stick was different for each of us.
I had never cared much for rules. Duty was what got my ass out of bed every morning—working my dad’s ranch, keeping the family together as best I could, and making sure Ben wanted for nothing. Brax, on the other hand, liked to say a man had to live his own way. He cared not one bit about duty, but good lord, how that man loved rules. He especially loved enforcing them.
And the way I was looking at James was wrong on both counts. Shirking duty and breaking rules.
“I’m not here to police your thoughts, but you need to keep that shit to yourself. Have some goddamn respect.”
“Yes, sir.”
Disgusted with myself, I pushed away from the rail. “I’ve got work to do. And so do the rest of you. I don’t pay you to stand around eating cookies all day.”
That got their attention. Steven disappeared into the stable. Jesse ducked between the rails to take Magpie’s reins from James. They headed off to the cool-down station out behind the barn, chatting away like old friends.
Blaine gave me a long look.
“What?” I grunted.
“Nothing,” he said, in a way that clearly meant something.
“You think I was too hard on him?”
“Nah. Steven needs to learn some manners.” He shook his head. “He can’t go running his mouth with every fool thing that pops into his head.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I don’t have a problem. Do you have a problem?”
“I don’t have a problem,” I ground out. “Except for this stupid conversation.”
He held out the container of cookies and gave it an inviting shake. “Have a cookie.”
I glowered at the container. Damn, they looked good. Smelled good, too. “I don’t want a cookie.”
Blaine’s lips twitched. “See, I think maybe that’s your problem right there. You do want a cookie. You just don’t want to admit it.”
My mood did not improve as the morning went on. I couldn’t get my mind off those cookies. Around noon, I finally caved, but of course they were long gone by then. I hadn’t seen Ben since breakfast. He had texted an hour ago, so I knew he was alive, but there was no sign of him anywhere—or James, for that matter. That meant they were probably together.
Like everyone else, Ben had taken a shine to James. I wasn’t sure what to make of that. He had always been a barn rat, but mostly he stuck to the horses, not the people. When he wasn’t hanging around the stables, he was in his room, reading—also alone. He had two close friends at school, but both of them lived far enough away that he didn’t see much of them when school was out. I felt guilty about that. I worried that he was lonely, that I wasn’t doing enough to give him the kind of childhood a kid should have.
His quick attachment to James was just one more thing to worry about. Was it weird? Did he miss his mom? His grandma? Or maybe he—
The sound of laughter jerked me out of my thoughts. It was the same laugh I first heard at Jo’s. Full and robust, like she pulled it deep from her soul. Something in me shifted at the sound. I headed toward it, exiting the barn, blinking in the sunlight.
There she was. On horseback, Ben riding next to her on Ginger, coming down the dirt path back to the barn. Her head was thrown back as she laughed at something Ben said. And Ben? Ben looked at her like she hung the damn moon.
Irritation rolled through me in a wave. Of course he did. She was fun. She didn’t have to worry about things like rules and duty and responsibility.
“What the hell is this?” I demanded.
James’s pink lips popped open in surprise at my tone. “A trail ride? I wanted—”
“I don’t care what you wanted,” I cut her off. “You took my kid for a ride without telling me. I had no idea where he was.”
Ben blanched. “Dad—”
I held up my hand. “Ben, you know the rule.”
James’s head whipped in his direction. Her eyebrows went up in a question. “We didn’t leave the property.”
“He knows he’s supposed to tell me before he goes for a ride. If he’s on horseback, I need to know where he is, even if it’s only in the training ring. You had no business taking him anywhere on horseback without telling me.”
Two red splotches appeared on her cheeks. Her eyes narrowed. “Do I need to remind you that I’m not the babysitter?”
The anger in her dark eyes caught me by surprise. It might have been the first time I had seen her anything but smiling. And why? What the hell did she have to be mad about? “Damn right, you’re not. I would expect anyone I paid to watch my kid to know what is and isn’t acceptable behavior. Untack the horses. When you’re done, I want to see you in my office.”
The heat of her glare scorched my back as I strode back into the barn. Figuring I would get some paperwork done while I waited for James, I threw myself into the rolling chair behind my desk. A wheel popped off, and it wilted on one side. Great. Fucking great.
Fine. I wasn’t in the mood for paperwork anyway. Actually, I was never in the mood for paperwork, but I could usually force myself to focus long enough to get it done. Right now, there was no chance of that happening. I pushed to my feet, resisting the urge to kick the chair on my way out. Because I was an adult.
Needing something to take the edge off, I grabbed a pitchfork and headed for a stall. Nothing like shoveling shit to work out a shitty attitude, Dad always said. And my attitude was shit, I couldn’t deny that. There was no reason for me to lay into James like that. She was right; she wasn’t the babysitter. It was on Ben to tell me he was going riding, not her. He knew the rule.
Goddamn it.
I didn’t want to do this right now. He had just spent the last hour having a fantastic time with James and now I had to come in and dole out the punishment. It was always me. I didn’t have a wife I could share the crappy parenting jobs with. Lord knew my dad wasn’t up to the task—and I didn’t want him to be. Grandparents were for love and sugar, not lectures and punishments. Keeping Ben safe was my responsibility.
Good times came from literally anyone else. Bad times always came from me. Sometimes I worried about what that meant for our relationship. Maybe the second he turned eighteen, he would shake off the ranch dust and get as far from me as he possibly could. I hated the thought of that.
My shoulders felt tight, like a heavy weight had been set there. Whether by someone else or my own stupid self, who was to say?
I leaned the pitchfork against the wall and rested my forehead there, too. Stalling.
“Are you mad?” Ben’s voice was quiet. Anxious.
I raised my head wearily, prepared to give him the whole, I’m not mad, just disappointed speech when I realized he wasn’t talking to me. He was talking to someone outside the stall.
“Yeah, Ben, I’m mad,” James said.
Immediately my hackles went up, whatever the hell hackles were. My instinct was to jump in and defend Ben. But from what? The truth of the matter was, she had a right to be mad. And she wasn’t raising her voice at him. She was just stating a fact.
“The thing is, you knew the rule, and I didn’t. I didn’t know that you had to tell your dad before you got on a horse. You put me in a bad spot with him and now he’s mad at me. Why didn’t you tell him what we were doing?”
I could hear the sound of Ben shuffling his feet against the straw-covered dirt. “I don’t know,” he muttered.
There was a pause. “Yes, you do.”
“Yeah.” More shuffling. “I left my phone in the breakroom when I went to get some water. You were mostly tacked up already. I figured you wouldn’t want to wait for me to text my dad and tack up Ginger.”
My ribcage squeezed tight.
“I didn’t think you’d get in trouble,” Ben went on. “I thought as long as we were back before lunch, he wouldn’t find out I went without telling him. Dad never says no to riding, as long as I’m with someone. He would have said yes if I had told him. That’s almost the same thing as actually saying yes, right?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, choking back a laugh and a sigh. Goddamn, this kid.
“Compelling logic, but no.” There was a hint of a smile in James’s voice. “I would have waited for you.”
“Yeah?” His voice was full of hope.
“Of course. I could have managed on my own. I like exploring. But it’s better having someone along who can show you where all the cool stuff is. You’re a great trail guide.” Her voice turned serious when she said, “But you broke my trust, Ben. That can’t happen again.”
“It won’t,” he said hastily. “I don’t break rules.”
That was true. He and his uncle had that in common. I shook my head. Funny how I found it a lot more endearing in my kid than in my brother.
“Why not?” she asked, that same curiosity she had about Belle now directed at my kid.
“Never had a reason to, I guess. Dad doesn’t make a lot of rules and they’re not all that hard to stick to, usually.”
“Huh.” She sounded surprised by that. “Good for you, I guess, but that’s not always going to be the way of it. There are going to be rules you want to break, sometimes for a good reason and sometimes for no reason at all. And when that happens, I want you to ask yourself: Who is it going to hurt if I break this rule? If the answer is no one but yourself, have at it, but understand the consequences might not be all that fun. Learn your lessons.”
I frowned. I didn’t want Ben hurt. Ever.
That wasn’t exactly a reasonable request of the universe. Of course he was going to do dumb shit. Of course he was going to get hurt.
“But if the answer is anyone else at all, I want you to stop and think twice. That’s what friends do for each other. Okay?”
“Okay,” he said softly.
“Good,” she said. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He let out a big breath and so did I. Like that weight on my shoulders had lifted somewhat. It didn’t disappear entirely, but it got a little lighter. I was just so used to doing this alone.
Imparting life lessons to my son wasn’t her job, but here she was anyway, nudging him gently in the direction of being a decent human being. Not in the same way I would have done it, but maybe that was a good thing. Maybe he would actually hear it coming from her. And it was such a goddamn relief not to be the mean guy for once.
I heard them move off—Ben heading toward the big house, where Dad had a sandwich for him, and James turning in the direction of my office—and counted to ten before slipping out of the stall and following her.
I caught up with her right when she slapped open the door and found my office empty.
Her hands went to her hips. “That mother fucker,” she muttered.
The placement of her hands drew my attention to the way her hips and ass curved from her small waist. I allowed myself a single second to eye-fuck her as I leaned against the doorframe behind her. What Brax didn’t know, he couldn’t lecture me on.
“Now, that’s not fair. Haven’t fucked a mother even once, to my knowledge,” I drawled.
She let out a startled yip and spun on her toes, clutching her throat. She recovered quickly and narrowed her eyes at me. “Was that a joke?”
Well, shit. I guessed it was. The words had rolled off my tongue all natural and easy without me thinking much about it. I cocked my head, studying her. It had been a long time since I had joked around with anyone, but I was pretty sure the point of it was to make someone laugh.
James wasn’t laughing.
She was scowling.
Might have something to do with the way I lectured her in front of my kid and then summoned her to my office for more of the same. She probably expected me to yell at her again. Although, come to think of it, she didn’t look meek or apologetic, the way I would expect an employee to look when they were about to get reprimanded by their boss.
No, she looked like she was squaring off for a fight.
“Well?” she demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.
It suddenly occurred to me that, compared to her lower body, her upper region was oddly…shapeless. Almost androgynous. She could have an A-cup or Dolly Parton tits under her tee shirt for all I knew.
“Do you have something you want to say or not?” James pressed. “Because I have somewhere to be.”
I jerked my gaze to her face. The size and shape of her breasts wasn’t a mystery I was going to unravel today…or ever. “Where are you going?”
“Jo’s. I’m meeting a friend for coffee.” She glanced at her watchless wrist, like she could tell the time by her freckles. “And now it’s my lunch break, so…”
James had been in Aspen Springs for less than a week. As far as I knew, she didn’t have any friends here yet. Unless she had hit it off with one of the ranch hands. She and Jesse had seemed pretty friendly this morning. That didn’t give me a good feeling.
“I’ll drive,” I said. “No use in wasting gas when we’re both heading in the same direction anyway.”
She eyed me with deep suspicion. “You’re going to Jo’s?”
“Thereabouts.”
Her lips pursed. My gaze snagged there, on that plush pink mouth. Hard to believe my mouth had ever touched hers. Brutally unfair that it would never happen again.
“Fine,” she said. “But this is my break. Not an excuse to trap me in a car so you can yell at me some more. In fact, no work talk at all. Got it?”
I grunted noncommittedly. Not that I had any intention of yelling at her, but what the hell were we supposed to talk about, if not work?
“I mean it,” she insisted. “The second we’re off Lodestar Ranch, you’re not my boss.”
Ah, hell. There were lots of reasons to keep my mouth off Ms. Pink Boots, but that right there was the best of them. And she had just stripped it away.