Chapter 13 A GOLDEN CAGE #2
“So, he was notified of his cousin’s death?” Attes questioned from where he stood by the wall. “Does that mean Valyn’s wife was also notified?”
“Ty would’ve known—he would’ve felt it.” I dragged a hand over my face. “Eloana… she doesn’t know. That kind of news needs to be delivered in person, and…”
And I didn’t need to say more. For different reasons, neither Cas nor Malik would leave to do it. Or could.
Attes nodded. “I can do it.”
A frown pulled at my lips as I crossed my arms. “From what I know, Eloana has no knowledge of Valyn’s true bloodline. So, I don’t think her seeing you and then receiving that kind of news is a good idea.”
“You have a point.” He hesitated a moment. “But waiting much longer runs the risk of her learning.”
I knew that. Gods, did I ever know.
Reaver dropped onto the sofa, and I did something rather miraculous and didn’t tell him to get his ass off what had become my bed. At least there was something between the cushion and said ass.
“What’s the slightly concerning news?” I followed up, turning my attention back to Emil. “Or was that it?”
“Yeah, no, that wasn’t it,” he said, then went quiet.
I waited as he suddenly found the golden embroidery on the front of his surcoat fascinating. “And?”
“I’ll tell you,” Reaver announced. “It’s your best friend, the Dark Lord.”
Clearly, someone had been spending time with Millicent.
Tension crept into my neck. “What about him?”
Reaver leaned back, kicking his legs onto the upholstered stool. “He’s missing.”
I blinked once, then twice. “What do you mean he’s missing? I know he hasn’t left Carsodonia. I can feel him.”
“He’s not missing,” Emil said, casting a narrowed-eye look at the draken. “He’s just not where he’s normally at.”
As in he wasn’t in the Great Hall. And when he wasn’t there…
Well, shit either ended up in ruin or in ashes.
Fuck.
My stomach knotted. “Please tell me he has not discovered where Callum is.”
“As far as I know, he hasn’t,” Emil replied. “We know where he is.”
I frowned. “Then he’s not missing.”
“Yeah, I never said he was.” Emil jerked his chin at Reaver. “That one did.”
Reaver lifted a shoulder.
“So, where is he?” The options were limitless, as was why his presence in any of those locations could be concerning.
“He’s on the Cliffs of Sorrow.”
My gaze shot to Attes. “What?”
“That’s where he is,” the Primal said.
I stared at him.
“He’s been going up there a lot,” Attes added, and fuck if that didn’t shock me again. “I considered checking in on him but thought twice about it. He’s going to say something that irritates me, and I didn’t want to end up having to punch my great-grandson.”
“I don’t see a problem with that,” Reaver commented. “He could benefit from several punches.”
“Good luck to the fool who carries out that benefit,” Emil murmured. “Don’t think it’ll be the Dark Lord who ends up bruised and bloody.”
“You all need to stop calling him the Dark Lord,” I bit out, unfolding my arms.
“Why?” Emil laughed, but it wasn’t his normal deep laugh. I hadn’t heard one of those since shit had gone down. “He’d probably love it.”
“Which is why he’d benefit from a good punch in the di—”
“Enough,” I snapped, silencing the draken. “Believe it or not, he wouldn’t be humored by it.” My stare met Emil’s. “As you should know.”
The Elemental ducked his chin, having the decency to look embarrassed.
“I’ll go see what he’s up to.” I pushed off the desk.
“Should we wish you luck?” Reaver asked.
“Should you go fuck yourself?” I countered.
The draken snorted.
Attes’s eyes met mine briefly as I passed him. He didn’t say anything, seeming to be the only one in the room who knew when to keep their mouth shut.
Entering the narrow hall, I avoided the vines. Wayfair was eerily silent, empty of voices, the flutter of wings, and the croaks of ravens.
Fucking creepy birds.
Bypassing the Great Hall, I headed for a door without ornate decor. Pushing it open, I entered one of the many servant halls. The castle was a damn maze of them, but it was the quickest way to get outside.
Snow was now falling in lazy flakes, but I stayed under the roof of the colonnade. I turned my head to the east, toward the Cliffs. Without the inner wall, they loomed over the elms, their jagged edges dusted with snow.
What the fuck was he doing up there?
I eased the tension from my jaw and settled my breathing. Saddling a horse would take too long, and while I loathed the shadowstepping shit, I had to get over it.
Summoning the essence as I pictured the Cliffs, it responded in a hot rush that melted the snow that had drifted in under the roof and lay along the tiled floor.
A thin strip of silver eather appeared before me, crackling and hissing as it lengthened and widened.
The smell of damp wood and soil mixed with Cas’s and drifted from the tear.
And his scent? The crisp pine scent now mingled with something darker than the hint of spice that always clung to Cas.
Something that reminded me of fire but wasn’t smoke.
I couldn’t place it, but I felt like I’d breathed it in before.
Hands fisting, I walked through the tear. My entire body did that tingling thing I hated, and then there was that split second where it felt like my fucking body had come apart and pieced itself back together. It sounded insane, but that was how it felt.
The glow of eather quickly faded, letting my eyes adjust to the gloom of the overcast skies.
My gaze flickered over the meadow now blanketed in white.
Snow was piled along the sharp, jutting outcroppings of rock on the side of the Elysium Peaks that led toward the highest elevation and weighed down the branches of the nearby elms.
“Thought you were afraid of shadowstepping?”
The voice came before I even laid eyes on him, and when I did, my chest clenched.
Casteel sat at the cliff’s edge, the wind ruffling the inky waves of his hair.
Surprise rippled through me. With that hood almost always in place, I hadn’t seen it for any real length of time, so I hadn’t noticed how much it had grown.
His hair was as long as it had been when he’d returned from Carsodonia without his brother and Shea.
I swallowed the sudden thickness in my throat and got my legs moving. “You thinking about jumping?”
Cas didn’t answer for a long moment. “Why would I do that without an audience?”
I smirked at the almost expected response as my boots stirred up snow.
He waited until I was halfway to him before speaking again. “How’d you know I was up here?”
“What you mean to ask is how I knew you were here when you had the notam closed off to me again.”
He didn’t respond to that.
“I’m assuming Reaver saw you.”
“Fucker,” he muttered.
The corners of my lips tugged up. Since he didn’t say some insane shit, I kept walking. As I neared the cliff’s edge, the wind turned more biting and came at me harder. It didn’t bother me that much. Not when my body ran even hotter now.
Reaching him, I lowered myself to sit beside him, letting my legs dangle as the snow rose up from the void below.
Wait.
My eyes narrowed. “Is it just me, or is the snow rising?”
“It’s not just you.”
Twisting at the waist, I looked behind us. The snow fell like, well, normal—because of gravity.
“It’s only happening here.”
“Why…? You know what, I’m not even going to try to figure it out.
” I faced forward without looking at him.
After he’d returned from Carsodonia, he hadn’t liked eye contact and that kind of shit.
Not sure why I figured that was the best way to proceed, but I went with it.
“We received news of an unexpected visitor today.”
There was no reply.
I looked down at the jagged tips of the frosted rocks, the silent, frozen waterfall, and the distant crowns of the snow-covered elms. As messed up as the history of this place was, it was actually quite beautiful. “Ty is en route.”
The reaction was minimal, but I felt the sudden shift, the way his muscles tensed. “He shouldn’t be here.”
“I know.” I sighed.
The breath he let out was barely audible. “How is Perry?”
I didn’t let the relief I felt at hearing him question that show. “Sad. Angry.” I had to force an even breath in. “Naill has been hanging close to him.”
“Good.” That was all he said for a few moments, and I hoped that wasn’t the only thing he’d say. “I assume you spoke with the fuck?”
I knew exactly who that fuck was. “I have.”
“Were you planning to tell me?”
“I was waiting for you to ask,” I told him.
A beat of silence passed. “Asking now.”
I let my hands rest in my lap. “He had no idea about Pensdurth, nor did he seem to know that Kolis had come to the capital.”
“You believe him?”
“Can’t smell shit other than dead flowers when I’m around him, so I can’t say for sure.”
“But…”
“But I think he’s telling the truth.” I paused. “He also doesn’t seem to realize that I’ve changed. Probably the same with you.”
Cas shifted, his shoulder brushing mine. “Learn anything else?”
“He’s not very talkative,” I said with a huff. “For once.”
“Of course,” he replied.
He fell quiet after that, and so did I until I felt his fleeting gaze. Drawing in a deeper breath, I looked over at him—at his profile.
Cas looked like himself. Well, a tired version of himself, but there were no bones. No shadows moving in his flesh. There was, however, a heavy growth of hair along his jaw and around his mouth.
I pulled my gaze from his profile. “You need to sleep and eat.”
“I’ve been sleeping and eating.”
“You need more of both things, then.”
His laugh was low and carried away by the wind so quickly I almost missed it.
“The thing about sleep? About me getting more of it?” Cas said, his voice low. “I keep having these dreams. And not the kind I want. Only had that once.”
I knew what kind he wanted. What he’d only had once. Dream-walking with Poppy. I wanted to ask about that, see if he thought that meant she was waking. But I knew that wasn’t what he wanted to talk about. “What kind of dreams?”
“Like the ones I had when we slept in the Skotos.”
My brows lifted, not expecting that. I glanced at him, and our gazes locked. His eyes were golden shards lit by the low glow of eather.
“It’s like before. She’s…where I can’t reach her. Caged, but…” The breath he took looked like it pained him. His gaze drifted away from mine.
“But what?” I pressed.
“But it’s not the same,” he said. “What she’s in, what I can’t get through? It’s a golden cage.”
Seconds passed, and he didn’t elaborate. I gave him a little more time, and still, he was silent. Knowing him as I did, I knew that meant he wasn’t ready to say more.
But his dreams made sense.
I’d dreamt of her, too.
There were no cages, though.
“Why?” I asked, clearing my throat. I looked over at him. “Why have you been coming here?”
His head tilted. “I found her here once.”
Now, I understood.
Looking forward, I took another breath. “You gonna let me say something you wouldn’t let me get out before?”
Cas was silent.
I took that as a yes. “I should’ve told you about the promise I made to Poppy.”
He inhaled sharply at her name.
“You were right about that,” I continued. “It shouldn’t have blindsided you.”
“I know,” he stated flatly. “And I…I should’ve said something to her. You were also right.”
“We were also both wrong,” I murmured, blinking the snow from my lashes.
“Sounds about right.”
My lips curved upward in a faint grin.
He moved again, erasing nearly all the physical space between us and what felt like a hell of a lot more. “I never really blamed you, Kieran. Not in any way that made a difference.”
“I know,” I acknowledged, but this time, the two words came out hoarse and uneven.
Cas didn’t say anything more. Neither did I. We just sat there in the flurries, shoulders touching with each breath. The shape of the snow blurred.
And for the first time since Poppy left, since everything went sideways, I felt…settled. Calm. Peaceful.
But I knew the peace wouldn’t last.
For either of us.
But in these moments, I didn’t let myself think about what would bring the end of that peace for us. I just let myself be, shoulder to shoulder with Cas, as it always had been.
As it always should be.