Chapter Fifty-Two
It was a sacrifice I was more than willing to make if it meant all my loved ones would survive. I would give so much more than just my life to ensure their continued existence.
One for many.
I set Luna down and she immediately disappeared. I suspected she was going to find Xander, and I didn’t know how much time I had before he came to stop me.
Unsheathing the goddess’s sword, I put it in Zalira’s hands. She immediately stopped talking and looked at me. “What are you doing?”
“It has to be me. I’m going down and switching the lever.”
Silence.
Then everybody began to speak at once.
“That’s madness! You can’t do that!”
“What are you talking about?”
“You can’t be serious!”
Io pleaded with me. “Wait. Let’s talk about this. There has to be another way. I just haven’t thought of it yet.”
“There’s no time,” I said.
“I’ll go.” Suri started taking off her weapons.
“You can’t swim. Io’s not strong enough.
And Zalira and Ahyana are both injured. Every moment has led us here.
It’s supposed to be me. This is what I’m meant to do.
I swore in the temple to give my life to save yours, and that’s what I’m going to do.
We are bound by blood and love, in this life and the next.
It will never be broken. I will see you again. ”
“No!” Io protested.
“The prophecy,” I reminded her.
“You don’t even believe in the prophecy!”
I took both of her hands, trying to give her what comfort I could. “You do. And I believe in you. Now I need you to believe in me.”
She shook her head, tears streaming. “I take it back. You’re not the savior.”
“This is what’s supposed to happen.” I hugged her, and the rest of my sisters came over so that we could all hug each other, their bodies shaking as they cried.
Io lifted her head long enough to say, “There is a ladder built in on the left side, and you can use it to reach the bottom. When you get there, you have to pull the lever until you feel it click. That will seal the door and stop the others from opening. Then you need to swim as fast as you can for the surface.”
I nodded. “Please tell my family how much I love them.”
“We will.” Ahyana’s voice was broken.
“And always remember how much I love all of you.” There wasn’t time to say everything I wanted. Xander’s light inside me turned brighter. He was getting close.
I went over to the gate and tried to pull it, but it was stuck.
“Why are you closing the gate?” Zalira asked.
“Because Xander’s coming and he won’t let me do this. It has to be this way. I can’t explain. Please help me.”
They all hesitated for a moment, and then they came over and began to pull with me. I didn’t want to use my aspect yet. I was going to need it in the water. The gate groaned and protested but started to move. We pulled and pulled on the stiff metal, using all our strength.
I looked at the hole, and all I could think of was the dream I’d had, when I’d been told that my fate was in the water.
I found the ladder, and the cold water was a shock to my skin as I climbed down.
My sisters continued to push the gate closed over me until they finally fit it into the correct position.
“The trial of water,” Io said miserably.
“Lock it,” I said, my teeth chattering as I held on to one of the bars from the gate.
Suri did that for me, and Io let out a loud wail when the lock clicked into place.
Ahyana reached her arm through the bars and I moved over to her, taking her hand. My sisters all grabbed me, so that we were all touching.
“One for many,” Ahyana said through her tears.
“Many for one,” I told her. I was glad they were here. I didn’t want to die alone.
“Lia?”
Xander came into the room and I immediately released my sisters and backed up. He moved them out of the way and reached for me, pushing against the gate.
“What are you doing? Give me your hand!”
“I can’t do that.”
“We will open this gate and I will go in your stead,” he said.
“No, it has to be me.” Xander needed to live. The goddess had blessed him as her warrior. He would fight Artemisia and do what I’d failed to accomplish. He would save everyone.
This was my task—to save him. “I’m doing this for you.”
“You are not doing this for me! You’re not doing this at all!” He strained against the bars, pulling with all his might. I heard a creaking sound. If he was able to get it open . . .
“Xander.” I said his name calmly, quietly.
That got him to stop.
“It’s going to be all right. You will be all right, and that’s all that matters to me.”
He was frantic, shoving his arm through the bars, reaching for me. “Lia, don’t do this. Grab on to me! Take my hand!”
“Xander, look at me.”
His eyes were desperate, his expression frenzied. I knew exactly how he felt—just as I had when Quynh had been pulled from my grasp. I understood why she had made that choice. She had done it to save me, and I was doing this to save him.
Because of how I felt. How much he mattered to me.
And I wanted him to know that.
“I love you,” I said.
And I felt the moment our souls connected, my name permanently written into his heart. This could never be undone. I should have given him the words sooner. I should have spent hours, days, weeks, telling him the truth.
I had loved him for so long.
And I saw the moment when he realized why I was telling him now, and the desperation, the terror, I saw on his face was almost more than I could bear.
He stretched through the gate bars, as far as he could. More than anything I wanted to go over to him and take his hand, comfort him as best I could.
But I couldn’t. I knew what he would do. He would hold on to me tightly and not let go. It’s what I would have done had our situations been reversed.
“Swim over here and take my hand,” he said, still reaching for me.
“Xander, you have to let me go.”
“Please.” The word was desperate and broken, as if it had been wrenched from deep inside him, frantically begging me not to leave him.
That single word, the way he said it—it very nearly broke my resolve.
“I will always love you,” I said. “Find me in the next world.”
He started hollering for Thrax to bring him something to tear open the gate, and I got ready to dive.
Xander yelled out, “No!”
“Dea Erinys,” I said. And then I went under.
I heard the muffled sound of him screaming my name as I started swimming toward the bottom. The pressure of the water rushing past me was so intense that, even with the strength from my aspect, I had to use the ladder to pull myself down.
Part of me pleaded to turn around. Drowning was my greatest fear, and I was rushing into it headfirst. I thought of Demaratus’s words—that only those who wanted to live would die with honor.
I would die with honor. And as he used to say, that was all I could ask for.
This was what had to happen. I was meant to lay down my life for my enemies. To protect Ilion. To make up for the sin that Ajax the Lesser had committed. I was Aianteioi—I would recompense for the sacrilege that had been done.
And I was doing it because of the love I had in my heart. The oracle had told me that love would be a tool or a weapon, and I had chosen for it to be a tool. It made impossible things possible, made me capable of things I didn’t think I could do.
A silver light appeared next to me. It was Luna.
For one terrible moment I thought she was here to save me, to transport me out of the water, but she swam alongside me. Somehow she was causing her silver scales to light up, and that made it so I could see what I was doing.
My ears popped as my lungs began to scream for air. Begging me to take one breath, just one.
Sucking in water would be the worst thing I could do.
Down, down, down I went. My cheeks began puffing out as I tried desperately not to breathe. My lungs burned and burned, and my limbs started to feel heavy. My head pounded and my ears rang.
Little black dots appeared at the edges of my vision and then . . . there! I saw something shiny beneath me.
The lever.
I grabbed on to it and used the ladder for leverage so that I could push the lever in the opposite direction. Despite using my aspect, my strength felt nearly depleted. I fought against all my instincts to breathe, to swim up, so that I could finish this task.
Please help me.
Then I felt the click that Io had promised, and the water stopped rushing against me.
But it was still heavy as I struggled to swim. I tried reaching for Luna. She could save me and transport me out of here.
It had gone dark. I couldn’t see her, couldn’t feel her in the water.
Up and up I swam, my lungs feeling like they would burst as the water weighed heavily against me. It was like I was being burned alive, from the inside out. Everything hurt.
My arms and legs felt slow and clumsy. The black spots in my vision got bigger and bigger until I couldn’t see at all. I was so dizzy.
I wished it had been anything besides drowning.
It would have been so much better if I could have—