Chapter Sixteen
Patrick
Icouldn’t remember the last time I’d been nervous to have sex.
When had I begun using my role as a Dom as a mask to create distance between me and my partner?
It hadn’t started like that. Being a Dom had felt like stepping into myself finally and had been more intimate than any sex I’d had prior, but somewhere along the way that had changed.
When I really thought about it, that had changed before Max and I had even broken up. I’d stopped being vulnerable around him, and now I needed to learn how again.
It was strange how I could be in total awe of how Cooper stripped himself bare for me in every sense of the word, and yet my hands trembled at the thought of doing the same for him.
Today there were no props. No toys. No “outfits.” Just us, laid bare.
There was no sense of urgency, our energy closer to cautious exploration, like we were seeing each other naked for the first time. In a lot of ways, we were.
We stood facing each other in the centre of my room, and I reached out to pop the button on Cooper’s jeans before unzipping them.
I ran blunt fingernails along his thighs as I pulled the denim down and he stepped out of them.
Cooper threaded his fingers through my hair as I remained kneeling at his feet.
I kissed his knees and up his thighs and mouthed at his cock that remained trapped behind the soft cotton of his white briefs.
He reached for the hem of his T-shirt and tugged it off. I kissed him everywhere I could reach and then pressed my nose into the crease of his thigh, inhaling deeply the scent of his skin and musk that was so uniquely him.
From my spot on the floor, I glanced up at him to see his pink lip tugged between his teeth and his eyes dilated. “Can I suck you?” I asked.
Cooper nodded but added, “Could we go on the bed?”
I smiled up at him and got to my feet, pressing my lips to his and trying to steal his breath. Holding his head between the palms of my hands like I might almost lose him again if I let go, I pushed my tongue in between his soft, parted lips and tried to fuse us together.
We stumbled towards the bed, and I stripped my clothes clumsily as we went. Cooper fell back onto my mattress, and I kicked my jeans off before joining him, both of us left only in our underwear.
“Lie in the middle for me?” I asked.
Cooper scooched up the bed and got comfortable on his back, and the sight of him there almost broke me.
“You are so beautiful, Cooper.” He blushed immediately.
“Not just your body, but how you carry yourself and how who you are shines through. I need you to know that one day, when you’re ready, I want to end and begin every day with you in this bed.
” It terrified me to be that honest with him about what I really wanted without knowing how he’d take it, but if there was any hope for us, I needed to show him I could be vulnerable for him too.
Cooper gulped and his eyes glistened.
“You shouldn’t say that. I might not leave,” he whispered.
“You don’t ever have to leave unless you want to.” And I meant it.
I was done trying to keep my heart locked away and safe. Done pretending I hadn’t fallen head over heels for my little fox. Done with living a stagnant life out of fear of ever being hurt again.
I’d asked Jack if he’d do it all over again with Rory, even knowing how things were between them now, and he told me he’d do it in a heartbeat. In the end, I realised I’d rather risk heartbreak than the kind of regret I’d have if I never gave this budding love with Cooper a chance to be more.
Cooper trembled before me, but he didn’t look cold. Starting at his feet, I kissed the tip of his toes, the arch of his foot, his ankle, the inside of his knee. He giggled when I brushed featherlight kisses over the sensitive part of his ribs and then gasped when I sucked his nipple into my mouth.
I worshipped Cooper the best way I knew how. Showering his supple skin with gentle caresses and pouring love into every divot with my kisses.
When he was so wound up he was lifting his hips off the bed, I finally tugged his underwear down and turned my attention to that beautiful alpha cock of his.
His heavy length sat hard against his stomach, arousal dribbling onto his happy trail.
“How is even your belly button cute?” I asked, and Cooper’s abs tensed as he chuckled.
“Belly buttons are not cute,” he insisted.
“Not generally, but yours is. Maybe I’ll start writing Cooper Bailey belly button inspired poetry I can read to you every night,” I said, playfully nipping at the skin on his stomach.
The moment turned more sincere. “Thank you for reading to me last night,” Cooper whispered, reaching out to rub his thumb over my cheek.
I turned my head to kiss the palm of his hand. “I’d read to you every night.”
Cooper’s smile turned from a little shy to mischievous. “What else would you do to me every night?”
Anything you wanted.
“How about I show you?” I crawled up his body and pressed open-mouthed kisses to his collarbone and up his neck, making a delicious whimper fall from his lips. He didn’t reply, but I could feel his nod.
“Turn onto your front,” I whispered into his ear before gently nibbling the lobe.
As Cooper twisted to lie on his stomach, I quickly ditched my now very restrictive underwear and parted Cooper’s thighs to make room. Tucking my hands under his hips, I lifted him slightly off the mattress and buried my face between the sweetest cheeks I’d ever held.
When I spread them apart to run the flat of my tongue over his hole and up his crease, Cooper moaned and fisted the sheets.
I loved rimming Cooper. He was so responsive and vocal, letting me know exactly how good it felt. He tasted like skin, and him, and mine. I kept going, licking, kissing, sucking, and humming against his hole until Cooper was panting and shaking in my hands.
Relaxing my grip, I gently lowered Cooper back down and shuffled up to straddle the backs of his thighs.
Nestling my weeping cock between his cheeks, I reached for some massage oil I kept on my bedside table and dribbled it down Cooper’s spine and crease.
“Ohmygod,” Cooper mumbled when I dug my thumbs into the tight muscles of his shoulders. “Wow. Holy shit.”
Sometimes I had to remind myself how young Cooper was and the responsibility that came with that.
He was a grown man, but he hadn’t had a partner before, hadn’t had an alpha show him what it was like to be loved and adored before.
This time it didn’t scare me, though. What a privilege it was to be the alpha who would spoil him rotten with love and affection.
Once Cooper was a limp noodle under me, I leaned over his back and kissed him on the cheek. “What do you want, sweetheart? Do you want to nap or do you want me to make you come?”
“Can you… um. Can… um…” Cooper struggled to get his request out.
I kissed a soft trail along the dusting of freckles along his shoulders. “Ask for anything you want and it’s yours, okay?”
Cooper let out a deep breath and whispered, “Can you make love to me?”
I buried my face into his soft, oiled up back and took a breath. Cooper was too precious for this world, too precious for me, but I was greedy and selfish, so I’d keep him anyway.
“Of course, baby boy. I’d love to.” I kissed down his back and poured more oil between his cheeks before pressing one finger inside his soft hole.
He was relaxed and open for me, so I quickly added a second, scissoring them slightly to stretch him. I occasionally crooked my fingers to give his prostate some attention but not too much, as Cooper came quickly from that, and I didn’t want him to be overstimulated for this.
My boy loved being fingered, which was a blessing for me because I’d become a bit obsessed with it. His body wasn’t quite as accustomed to it as an omega’s might be, but it was made for it all the same.
When I could comfortably push three fingers in and out of him with ease, I asked him to turn over to face me.
Skin flushed and eyes glazed, Cooper was a sight. I licked up the length of his big cock and pulled his foreskin back, swirling my tongue around the head to collect the precum which had gathered there.
“You taste good everywhere, sweetheart,” I said, lowering my attention to his balls to suck them into my mouth one at a time.
“I don’t think I’m gonna last very long,” Cooper whimpered.
“All I want is for you to feel good. If you want to come, come. No rules right now.”
Cooper nodded. “I want it to last, though. I want to… remember this.”
I love you so fucking much already. I might not survive you.
“How about I promise to make love to you so often you don’t ever have to remember it?” I swallowed past a lump in my throat.
A tear tracked down Cooper’s cheek. “Will we still… do the other stuff, too?”
“When we’re both ready again, yeah. I… Leaving you to come down on your own after that scene and not giving you any aftercare was…
” I squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to remember Cooper’s face when he left the car.
“It was the worst thing I’ve ever done as a Dom.
It’s something we’ll need to build back up to, I think.
And it doesn’t have to be one or the other. We’ll find what works for us, okay?”
“Both sounds good to me.” Cooper smiled before reaching for the oil and passing it to me with a very clear request in his eyes.
I poured some over my cock and stroked my length a few times before adding a little more to his hole. Pushing his knees back, I leaned over him so the moment he let me inside his body, my lips would be pressed to his.
I worked my way in with gentle thrusts until I bottomed out, my balls resting against his.
“You okay?” I checked.
“Perfect,” he whispered.
“You have no idea how perfect.” I kissed all over his face and neck, giving him a moment to adjust before I pulled out slightly and then slowly worked my way in and out of him with gliding strokes.
I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and pulled him down so I could bury myself as deeply inside him as possible.
“You feel incredible. So beautiful. So perfect,” I murmured into his skin like it could absorb the words.
Cooper moaned and pressed his fingers into my muscled back as he chased friction for his cock against my stomach. I sped up, finding the rhythm that I knew undid Cooper.
“Too good. Feels too good. I’m so close already,” he cried.
“Spill for me, sweetheart. Show me how good it feels.”
I angled my hips to peg his prostate relentlessly, and Cooper writhed and trembled beneath me. Hot tears streamed down his cheeks, and I licked them from his face like a man who’d been denied water for days.
“Let it out. Let go, baby. I’ve got you. I promise I’ve got you. I love you so fucking much.”
Cooper cried out, and then he was shaking in my arms as his cum pooled between our stomachs. I followed him swiftly over the crest of the hill and gripped him tightly as my release filled him.
A loud sob ripped from his chest, and all I could do was hold him as he fell apart.
Sit with a heavy heart because I’d hurt him, and he needed to show me.
Let the anguish on his face imprint into my soul as a permanent reminder to protect him forever even if some days that was from the worst of myself.
I rearranged us so Cooper could curl up on his side and I could wrap myself around him. He cried, and I held on tight until his breathing slowly evened out and he drifted off to sleep.
I’m so sorry. I love you. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.